A Brooding Christmas Promise (Christmas Matches of Worth #2)

Chapter Fourteen

I have done nothing but think of Charlotte. Samuel let out a frustrated sigh and rubbed one hand over his eyes. He had been attempting to keep abreast of his correspondence and sign each of the invitations to his planned ball; however, he had struggled to do so. All he had done thus far was think about the lady and wonder about how they were to find out the truth about her father’s will, only to then remind himself that it had nothing whatsoever to do with him given that he was not a part of that family!

Scowling, Samuel set down his quill and rose to his feet, walking to pour himself a small measure of brandy. His thoughts had been fixed upon her ever since the previous afternoon and though he had tried to stop thinking about her and what her present situation was, it had been difficult.

“I must complete these.” Muttering to himself, he threw back his brandy and made his way back to his desk. He only had a few more invitations to sign before they could be sent out but it was taking him an age to complete them!

“Good afternoon. I hope you do not mind the intrusion?”

Samuel looked up from his desk, glad to see Lord Trenton. “Not at all, otherwise why would I have told the butler to always permit your entry without any need for introduction?” He grinned as his friend chuckled, a welcome relief from his own frustration. “Come. Sit down and tell me all that you have been doing.”

“Well.” Lord Trenton sat down and slapped one hand across his knee. “I have been doing a great many things, including sending my servants out to fetch the Yule log!”

“Something I am still to do,” Samuel murmured, his thoughts turning again to Miss Millerton, wondering if she would like to come out to the nearby forest in search of the best Yule log. “Though I have made certain that the cook knows to prepare the Twelfth Day cakes.”

“And you recall that St Thomas’ Day is very soon?”

Samuel nodded, recalling that there would soon be widows in need coming to the house in the hope of some gifts of food or coin by which they might survive the winter. “I shall also have to have my Christmas boxes soon prepared for the servants.”

“Indeed you shall – though there is to be much gaiety before then!”

Samuel gestured to the pile of invitations sitting on his desk. “Gaiety that I intend to add to! I have decided to have a masquerade ball.”

Lord Trenton’s eyebrows lifted. “Indeed. That is interesting. I do not think you have thrown a ball in many a year.”

“That is because I have been absent from London and endured all of Christmas alone,” Samuel answered, a wry smile on his lips and a heaviness in his heart as he recalled all he had tolerated and suffered – though his previous loneliness had been by his own hand. “I did say that I would do what I could to make certain that Miss Millerton was given some events to attend where Lady Foster would not be present and I do intend to do that.”

“An excellent thing,” his friend answered, still smiling. “I am to have a soiree this week, if you recall?”

Samuel laughed, seeing Lord Trenton’s smile grow to a grin. “Indeed, you have done very well also. The soiree shall be an excellent one, I am sure, and she will be delighted to be present there without Lady Foster’s attendance.” He tipped his head, his lips bunching for a moment as he thought about whether he ought to confess the difficulty he was having in removing the lady from his thoughts. “I should also tell you that –”

A scratch came at the door and Samuel, a little frustrated, called for the butler to enter. “Yes?”

“A caller, my lord. She is most insistent and –”

“I must speak with you.”

Samuel’s heart leapt – though not with delight – as Lady Grifford hurried into the room, her eyes fixing to his.

“Forgive the intrusion but I have been waiting for many a day now for you to call on me but that has not taken place. I had to speak with you, I had to – ”

“As you can see, I am in company at the present moment, Lady Grifford.” Irritation crept up as a flush in Samuel’s skin, reaching up to his neck. “I did not expect you to call, given that we have not arranged anything.”

“But that is precisely my point!” the lady exclaimed, clearly ignoring all that Samuel had said. “I must speak with you! There is so much that I wish to say, so much that I desire to share with you that I feel as though it is a heavy burden upon my shoulders and I am struggling to bear it!”

Samuel bit back his first response, wanting to inform her of just how much he had suffered and endured after her decision to step away from him and into the arms of another. Instead, he looked to Lord Trenton who, it seemed, was watching the situation with interest, though Samuel knew that he would not think well of Lady Grifford in all of this.

“With Grifford now gone, my heart is torn into pieces, my shame spread out for all to see.” Lady Grifford’s voice grew softer, her head lowering just a little. “I am sure that the ton now all whisper about me, speaking of my foolishness and of the scoundrel I once called husband. Not that I do not deserve such a thing.” Her head dropped even more, her shoulders rounding. “I am also well aware that I do not deserve even the slightest consideration from you, Crestwood. Yet, here I am.”

The familiarity with which she spoke his name sent fire shooting up Samuel’s spine, though it was not a pleasant sensation. All the same, he did feel a little sympathy for the lady, but there was no stirring of his affections. “I shall always be cordial with you, Lady Grifford,” he stated, hoping that she would see the emphasis he placed on speaking her title correctly rather than with the familiarity that she had. “However, I do have many other matters which concern me at present. I am sorry to speak plainly but you must recognise that your considerations are no longer something that I think on.”

Her head lifted, her eyes fixing to his. “I am no longer of significance to you,” she said, a sadness in her voice which, much to Samuel’s frustration, aroused his sympathy. “I understand. Though, despite my rudeness and my thoughtless interruption, might you please come to call on me soon? I promise it will not be more than a few minutes of your time.”

Samuel took in a slow breath, studying her. He did not want to spend any time in her company; that he knew very well. Everything in him was pushing back from her, pushing away, so why should he want to linger in her company? But there was still something there between them, something that he could not ignore. Perhaps it was only sympathy and sympathy alone which called him to her, Samuel did not know. But he found himself spreading out his hands and promising that yes, he would call upon her very soon.

“Very soon?” Lady Grifford took a step closer to him, her hand reaching out though she did not touch his hand or arm. “When, Crestwood? In two days’ time? Three? Or will I be forced to wait sennight upon sennight, telling myself that there is going to come a day when you will remember what you have said and will come to call.”

A flickering annoyance pushed through Samuel’s heart but he kept his expression clear. “I will call upon you within the week,” he promised, seeing how her eyes cleared and how what seemed to his eyes to be relief, begin to flood her expression. “I give you my word.”

“Oh, I thank you.” This time, she did catch his hand in hers, did press his fingers and smile up at him – and inwardly, Samuel pulled back though he did not forcibly yank his hand out of hers. Instead, he merely let her release his hand and felt himself glad when she had done so, moving back slowly so that she would not think to do such a thing again.

“Within the week,” he said again, as Lady Grifford made for the door, hurrying towards it as though she could not now be eager enough to step away from him. “Good afternoon, Lady Grifford.”

She smiled, waved and then without a word, quit the room, leaving Samuel to close his eyes, blow out a breath and then shake his head as he looked to Lord Trenton. “Whatever was that about?”

Lord Trenton chuckled mirthlessly. “To my mind, that was Lady Grifford’s attempts to coerce you into calling upon her, which, unfortunately, she succeeded in.”

“Coerce?” Samuel shook his head. “Hardly.” Seeing his friend’s eyebrow lift, he winced and then shrugged. “I am afraid that there was nothing within mε willing to refuse her.”

“Because you care for her still?”

The harsh response which jumped to Samuel’s lips was held back solely by sheer effort. Taking a moment, he went to pour another measure of brandy for himself and another for Lord Trenton. “I can assure you, I felt no gladness, no happiness or the like.”

“Then what did you feel?”

Samuel took a sip of his brandy rather than speaking. Waiting for a few moments, he let out a slow breath and then shook his head. “I believe it was sympathy,” he said, as Lord Trenton’s eyebrows lifted. “We had a strong connection even though it was some years ago.”

“Or so you thought.”

Wincing, Samuel spread out both arms wide, one hand still gripping his glass of brandy. “We had a connection still! I do not believe that everything she ever said to me was false and we did share a great deal.” He let his arms go back to his sides. “I would not have come to care for her as I did had I not known her. Yes, she did not love me as I loved her but we were well acquainted. It is that which I feel still, I suppose.”

Lord Trenton clicked his tongue. “I would say that she is using that to her advantage. You must be careful, my friend.”

“Careful?” Samuel chuckled ruefully. “I can assure you, when it comes to Lady Grifford, there is no danger there for me whatsoever.”

Another lifted eyebrow.

“I do not even think of her any longer,” Samuel promised, speaking the truth wholeheartedly. “She is not in my thoughts, whether it be in a good or bad way. I spent years doing so and I can assure you, I do not permit her into my thoughts for even a moment.”

“I am surprised, I confess, though I am glad to hear it.” Lord Trenton smiled briefly. “I did think that, in seeing her again, you might find yourself a little… tangled.”

Without warning, Miss Millerton swept her way back into Samuel’s thoughts and he smiled without meaning to. Seeing his friend’s look of surprise growing, Samuel shook his head, dismissing the questions Lord Trenton might be about to ask. “I have had other things on my mind of late, that is all – including these invitations to the masquerade ball which I fear I shall never finish!”

“I see.” Lord Trenton rose to his feet and, finishing his brandy, set it down on the table. “Then I shall take my leave of you and permit you to complete them without further interruption.” Without smiling, he came closer to Samuel and, putting a hand on his shoulder, gazed at him steadily. “I do hope that you will take a great deal of care when it comes to Lady Grifford. I fear that she is just as deceptive as she was before.”

Samuel nodded, wanting to tell his friend that he had no need to concern himself but instead, simply accepting Lord Trenton’s warning. “I shall be.”

“Good.” With a nod, Lord Trenton stepped away. “I shall see you this evening.” He grinned over his shoulder. “Mayhap they shall have a kissing bough again this evening!”

“A kissing bough at a soiree?” Samuel scoffed, shaking his head. “I hardly think so.”

“Oh, but do you not know that our host, Lord Howden, has decided to make it a good deal grander than he first thought?” Lord Trenton’s grin grew all the wider. “There is an orchestra and the ballroom shall be adorned accordingly, as well as having the Christmas soiree in the other rooms of the house. There will be a feast and cards and all manner of entertainment – in short, I believe he is trying to outdo my own magnificent Christmas event!”

Samuel laughed as Lord Trenton opened the door. “And you are still to attend?”

“But of course. It sounds quite marvelous and I am determined not to miss it, even if he does prove himself to be a better host than I!” With another laugh, Lord Trenton quit the room and left Samuel to his own thoughts.

“A kissing bough,” Samuel murmured to himself, his smile slowly beginning to fade as he made his way back to his desk, the invitations waiting for him still. The thought was a pleasant one, he had to confess, made all the pleasing by the thought of having Miss Millerton in his arms and stealing a kiss from her.

The thought was a startling one but it brought him no shock nor dread. Instead, he let himself linger on it, thinking about all that might be and wondering, silently, what it was that made him consider such a sweetness.

I have already assured her that I have no intention of courtship or matrimony, he reminded himself, sitting back down and picking up his quill. There can be no reason for my thoughts to turn to her in such a way as this.

Determining to consider only his invitations, Samuel dipped his quill in the ink and began to write – only for his quill to lift as a vision of Miss Millerton cast itself before his eyes. It was as if, in hearing that she might be freed from her vow to live as a spinster and companion to her stepmother, his heart had found a new sense of freedom also – even if it seemed, very much, to want to be captured anew… though this time, by someone who would treat it with a good deal more care and consideration than Lady Grifford ever had.