A Forbidden Night with a Scot (Sins in a Kilt #1)

Chapter 5

CHAPTER FIVE

B y the time Alicia and Samuel made it to the stables, her tears had dried. Samuel had even made her laugh a few times, though the cheer was always short-lived, the knowledge that she would soon be married off to Laird MacTavish still looming over her.

She didn’t think she would ever get over it. If anything, as the wedding approached, she would surely fall deeper and deeper into despair.

But for now, she was with Samuel and the two of them were riding to the loch near the castle, where Alicia had spent many summers of her childhood. She had always liked that place—cool in the summer and the water freezing over in the winters. As a child, some winters had been so cold that it had allowed her and Katherine to play on its icy surface without fear of falling inside, but it had been a long while since she had last dared such a thing.

Now, it was one of those rare days when the air was nice and warm, the sun shining brightly in the sky. The recent storms had passed and it seemed to Alicia that they would get a couple of days, at least, of this fine weather.

Perfect fer swimmin’. I should bring Katherine here too on the morrow.

It struck her then, the thought that they wouldn’t have many of these days left together. If there was no way for her to avoid this marriage with Laird MacTavish, then she would soon be whisked away to his castle and would rarely, if ever, visit her home and her family, just like Emmeline. Even if Castle MacTavish was closer, easier to travel back and forth from, she would be expected to spend her days there, with nothing but short visits home, if she was lucky enough to have them.

Had she known she would be forced to wed for convenience, she would have made sure to cherish every moment she had with her sister.

“It’s too bonnie o’ a day fer ye tae be so gloomy,” said Samuel, pulling Alicia out of her thoughts. “This willnae happen fer a while still. Dinnae think about it right the now.”

“That is easy fer ye tae say,” said Alicia as the two of them rode leisurely down the path to the lake. Already she could see it stretching over the green valley that sprawled under the hill where Castle MacCallum stood, its blue waters glittering in the sunlight like a jewel. “If ye were in me position, ye wouldnae be able tae think about anythin’ else either.”

“Ach, lass… have ye nae learnt yet that I can distract ye from all yer troubles?” Samuel asked. “Remember when ye were a wee lassie an’ ye were so upset because ye kissed that lad?—”

“We’re nae talkin’ about that!” Alicia shrieked, her face instantly flooding with color at the memory. “An’ I wasnae a wee lassie! It was only… seven, eight years ago?”

That only worsened her case, Alicia realized, but only after she had already spoken. She had been around fifteen years of age when her father had thrown a ball in celebration of Emmeline’s eighteenth day of birth, which also happened to be the first time she had visited home after marrying Laird Macfie. The son of one of the nobles had kissed her that night—a handsome boy a year or two older than her, the kind of boy who should have made her stomach flutter and her heart skip a beat or two. And yet the kiss had only upset her, not only because, even then, she had been infatuated with Samuel, but also because she couldn’t escape the thought that Emmeline had been forced to marry her husband at the same age as Alicia was then.

No one would force her to wed that boy, of course; Alicia had known as much. But the thought of her sister, still so young, with Laird Macfie sickened her, and she had run to her chambers in the middle of the feast, only to bump into Samuel on the way.

Much like now, when I ran out o’ faither’s study.

Samuel had comforted her then, too. He had pulled her in his arms and calmed her, reassuring her that no matter what had happened, it would all be fine.

“I’m only sayin’ that ye didnae think about that kiss fer too long, did ye?” Samuel asked with an amused chuckle, undoubtedly remembering her ridiculous overreaction to that kiss. “Ye cried fer a while an’ then we went back tae the ball an’ we danced an’ ye forgot everythin’ about it.”

“That may be true, but this isnae the same,” Alicia pointed out. “This isnae merely a kiss. They want me tae wed an old man!”

Samuel sighed, nodding slowly. “Aye, I suppose ye’re right,” he said. “But that doesnae mean that we cannae enjoy the day today. Look around ye. Have ye ever seen such a bonnie day?”

As pretty as the day was, Alicia couldn’t bring herself to fully enjoy it. Even as they dismounted their horses and walked to the bank of the lake, Alicia kneeling by the waters to dip her hand inside its cool depths, she still felt as though a cold, vicious hand was wrapped around her heart, squeezing relentlessly. Sitting down next to her, Samuel placed a hand on her shoulder, and Alicia leaned into the comforting touch, allowing herself to be selfish for a moment.

What did it matter, after all? Sooner or later, she wouldn’t have the chance for such touches.

“Ye must think me a foolish bairn,” Alicia said with a humorless laugh. “All I dae is complain.”

“I would never think such a thing,” Samuel assured her, his hand rubbing soothing circles over her shoulder. “Nay one thinks this is easy fer ye, Alicia. An’ nay one wants this marriage any more than ye dae.”

“Laird MacTavish daes,” Alicia pointed out.

“Well, Laird MacTavish is the fool,” said Samuel. “If I could…”

His voice trailed off, but when Alicia looked at him, she could see the clench of his jaw, tight and painful, a small muscle there jumping with every breath he took. She could practically feel the rage radiating off him, but after a few moments, he pulled himself back together, drawing in a deep breath. It was only a mask, Alicia knew, just for her sake. That rage wasn’t simply going to dissipate like that.

Instead of lingering on Laird MacTavish, Samuel reached towards the edge of the bank and plucked a small, white flower from a small patch that grew on the ground, handing it to Alicia. She took it, cheeks heating at the gesture, and she hoped Samuel would blame it on the sun rather than her embarrassment. It was so sweet that her stomach fluttered now.

“A bonnie flower fer a bonnie lass,” he said with a smile, and Alicia had to remind herself that it didn’t mean anything—at least it didn’t mean what she wanted it to mean. Samuel was simply being nice, as he had always been to her.

Somehow, without Alicia realizing it, they had leaned closer to each other, and now nothing but a few inches was separating them. Alicia could see every detail of Samuel’s eyes, the golden flecks in the blue, the colors bright and vibrant under the light of the sun. She could feel his gentle exhale on her lips, the warmth his body radiated.

All she would need to do to kiss him would be to lean just a little closer, bridge the gap between them and brush her lips against his. But what would Samuel do then? Alicia doubted he would kiss her back. No, it would simply make everything awkward between them. Perhaps it would even anger him, and that was the last thing Alicia wanted.

She had few joys in her life now—her family and Samuel. She wasn’t going to risk losing him like this.

Samuel was the first to pull back, abruptly, and Alicia couldn’t help but fear that he had somehow managed to read her mind. Had her desire been clearly written on her face? Had he realized how much she wanted him?

Is there anythin’ I can say tae fix this?

It turned out she didn’t have to. Before she could think of something to say, Samuel asked, “What dae ye wish tae dae then today?”

Alicia hesitated for a moment. They did have the whole day ahead of them since it was still early, but she hadn’t thought she would be spending it with Samuel.

“Dinnae ye wish tae see me faither?”

“There is time fer that,” Samuel assured her. “What dae ye wish tae dae?”

So much fer tryin’ tae stay away from him.

Alicia couldn’t help the grin that spread over her lips, excitement coursing through her at the thought that they could spend some time together, just the two of them. Maybe she could forget about Laird MacTavish, after all, even if it was just for one day.

“I’d like tae swim,” she said. “Since we’re here already, we may as well.”

Before she could stand on both legs, though, Samuel grabbed her arm and stilled her. “Nay,” he said firmly, the command so harsh and sudden than Alicia promptly sat back down, surprised by the outburst.

Samuel’s eyes were wide and fearful when Alicia looked at him, but slowly, the grip on her arm relaxed, though it never released her entirely.

“Nay,” he said again, this time sounding calmer. “I think it’s best if ye stay on land. The water…”

Once again, his voice trailed off and for a few moments, Alicia was left to wonder why he was so strongly against it, before she remembered his fear of the sea—or rather the fear that the sea would take another of his loved ones. She had never thought it extended to all kinds of water, though, even a small lake whose waters were mostly shallow.

“Alright,” she said, nodding reassuringly. “I willnae go in the loch, I promise. Perhaps… perhaps we can go back tae the castle an’ ye can show me how tae shoot a bow? I loved it when ye taught me as a bairn but I cannae dae it anymore.”

Her easy acceptance seemed to calm Samuel even further and he smiled at Alicia as he stood, offering her his hand to help her up. “How did ye forget? I spent hours teachin’ ye how tae shoot.”

“It’s been a long time!” Alicia protested. “An’ Faither didnae want me tae shoot bows. He says it doesnae become a lady an’ I should spend me time embroiderin’ or paintin’.”

“Well, yer faither doesnae ken anythin’,” Samuel teased. “Dinnae listen tae him. Lasses should ken how tae fight. Maybe if ye kent, then ye wouldnae have been in that situation at the tavern.”

“Ach but then how would ye come tae save me?” Alicia teased right back. “I wouldnae deprive ye o’ the opportunity tae act like a hero, since ye seem tae enjoy it so much.”

“I should have left ye there,” said Samuel and Alicia stuck her tongue out childishly at him before she jumped on her horse, riding ahead of him just to make him chase her. Just as she expected, Samuel rushed after her, the hooves of his horse thundering against the ground, before he fell into step next to her. “Or maybe I should have told yer faither.”

“Ye willnae tell him now,” said Alicia with the kind of confidence that came with years of experience. Whenever Samuel promised her something, he always delivered. “If ye wished tae tell him the truth, ye would have already done so.”

“Ye sound very certain.”

“I am.”

Next to her, Samuel laughed, but he didn’t try to claim she was wrong. Instead, he fell silent, and the two of them rode like that up the path, Alicia keeping a slow pace for the sake of the horses.

It was only when they were reaching the top of the hill that Alicia saw something from the corner of her eye that made her freeze, instinctively tightening her grip on the reins and bringing her horse to a halt. Samuel, noticing she had come to a stop, stilled his horse a few steps away, turning around to look at her in concern.

It’s a bee. I ken it’s a bee. I saw it.

It had been little more than a shadow in her field of vision, but Alicia knew a bee when she saw one. She could hear its buzz, too, so loud in her ears that she was certain it had to be somewhere close, but she was too fearful to turn her head and look.

Slowly, Samuel approached her, but Alicia was quick to shout, “Stay back!”

“What’s wrong?” he asked. He didn’t listen to her at all and despite her warning, he approached until he was right next to her once more. “What happened?”

“There’s a… a bee,” said Alicia, voice trembling with fear just as her whole body did. “Dinnae move. It’s still here.”

“It’s alright,” Samuel assured her. “It’s alright, Alicia. It’s only a bee.”

That did nothing to help with her panic. If anything, the lack of panic in Samuel, the lack of urgency, only served to strengthen her fear. If Samuel didn’t see the bee as a threat at all, then they were both in danger. What if it stung him? What if Alicia managed to escape it, fleeing fast enough from the area, only for the bee to attack Samuel?

Would she lose him, too?

Before she could insist that they had to leave, the bee buzzed by her once more, this time heading for Samuel, and Alicia didn’t think at all before she threw herself at him, pulling him away from its flight path. In her panic, though, she neglected to hold onto the saddle and slipped from her horse, dragging Samuel down to the ground with her as her fingers clawed at his clothes, tangling into the fabric of his shirt.

Their backs collided with the earth, a dull thud echoing around them. Spooked, the horses ran off a little farther down the path, but Alicia couldn’t pay them any mind when all the air had been knocked out of her lungs from the impact and—more importantly—she could still hear the bee.

Next to her, Samuel groaned, pushing himself upright with some effort before dusting his hands. “Are ye alright?” he asked. “Are ye hurt?”

“I’m nae hurt but I’m nae alright either!” said Alicia, frantically looking left and right to search for the bee. “Where is it? Dae ye see it?”

“Calm down,” Samuel urged her, once again offering her his hand to help her up. Alicia took it, this time a little apprehensively, still searching for the threat in the air around them. “It’s only a bee, Alicia, one bee. Even if it stings ye, it willnae hurt ye too badly.”

“Ye dinnae ken that!”

If it stung her, then she could die. If it stung Samuel, then he could die, too. Alicia had witnessed it with her own eyes and she wasn’t going to trust anyone when they told her that bees were harmless.

There it was, the buzz of the bee, once again coming near them and Alicia waved her arms wildly around her head, trying to get it to fly away. The more she panicked, though, the closer the bee came, and in the end, she heard Samuel draw in a sharp breath, followed by a quiet curse—and then silence. The bee was nowhere to be heard.

Alicia hadn’t realized that she had closed her eyes, but now she opened them, blinking at Samuel in confusion. Within moments, she spotted the redness near his wrist, where his skin had been exposed, uncovered by the fabric of his sleeve.

“Did it sting ye?” she asked, her voice high and reedy and filled with terror. “Samuel, did it sting ye?”

“It did,” Samuel confirmed, calm as ever. “An’ it hurts but it isnae so bad. I promise ye. See? I am fine, lass.”

“We must get ye tae the healer! Perhaps he’ll ken what tae dae. Perhaps there is an antidote or something he can give ye tae?—”

“Alicia,” said Samuel calmly, reaching for her hands and holding them tightly in his. “I am fine. Look at me. Naething has happened.”

Alicia looked for any signs of swelling or anything that would indicate something was wrong, but found none. Still, perhaps it was too early for him to show any signs at all, so she was not fully reassured.

Perhaps sensing her apprehension, Samuel only tightened his hold on her. “I will see the healer if it pleases ye,” he said. “An’ then ye will see that everythin’ is fine.”

Alicia nodded, thinking this was the best course of action. Samuel had already been stung, after all. There was nothing she could do to change that or to protect him from it anymore. All she could do was hope he was right and that nothing bad would happen to him.

“It isnae the first time I’ve been stung by a bee,” he said, as he pulled her to her feet and the two of them walked back to the horses. “Dinnae fash. I didnae ken ye were so scared o’ them.”

“There’s plenty ye dinnae ken,” Alicia mumbled, the fear and adrenaline leaving her exhausted as they drained out of her. Samuel looked at her, puzzled, but she only climbed onto her horse, waiting for him to do the same before they continued up the path.

She could never tell him the truth. She could never reveal to him just how much she wanted him.