A Forbidden Night with a Scot (Sins in a Kilt #1)

Chapter 22

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

A fter Katherine’s departure, Samuel stared at the blank surface of his door for several moments, thinking. Like Katherine had said, Alicia was alone. This would be the perfect opportunity to talk to her, the only time he could use in order to truly be around her in the midst of all this chaos. It would be the perfect opportunity to visit her and kiss her and hold her, no one around to disturb them.

It took him a few attempts to convince himself to get up from the chair and make his way to the door, then to Alicia’s rooms. There, he hesitated once more, staring the door down as if it was his opponent.

All I must dae is knock. So why is it so difficult?

Raising his fist, he finally, slowly knocked on the hard wood, and in a few moments, the door opened to reveal Alicia there, preparing for bed and wearing a look of surprise on her face along with the soft nightgown around her shoulders.

“Samuel?” she asked. “What are ye doin’ here so late?”

Samuel hesitated, nervously shifting his weight from one leg to the other. “Katherine… she told me ye would be alone tonight an’ that I should… I should visit ye.”

Alicia smiled softly, slowly, her gaze dropping to the floor as her cheeks flooded with color. Stepping aside, Alicia let Samuel walk into the room and then closed the door behind him, the two of them awkwardly hovering around each other for a moment or two.

There was something different about that night, Samuel thought, and he knew Alicia could feel it, too. They were at the precipice, so close to the moment when they would both have to make a decision and stick with it. Samuel had already made his—he would speak to Gavin. He had to finally tell him the truth, even if that meant fighting off all of his fears in order to achieve it.

“I’ve been thinkin’…” Samuel said as he turned to face Alicia, the two them still standing near the door. “I shall speak with yer faither soon. It is time we resolve this issue, there is nae point in delayin’ it any further. It will only worsen our position against the king. The more I wait, the more he, too, waits fer ye tae wed Laird MacLaine an’ the more disappointed he will be when he finds out that weddin’ willnae happen.”

If the bright, excited smile Alicia gave him was any indication, she was pleased by Samuel’s decision, just as he had expected she would be. All the awkwardness between them dissipated when she threw herself into his arms, wrapping hers around his neck and holding tightly onto him as she buried her face in his shoulder. The solid warmth of her body was a balsam like no other, soothing Samuel’s fears instantly.

Nothing that felt so right, so perfect, could ever be wrong. Nothing could tear them apart, either, not if Samuel didn’t let it.

“Faither is well,” Alicia assured him. “He is gettin’ better every day. I’m sure he is well enough tae listen tae what ye have tae tell him. Dinnae fash about him. He is strong.”

Though Samuel was well aware of his friend’s strength, he was also aware of his weakness: his daughters. Alicia didn’t know how many times Gavin had turned to him when he was at his most desperate, not knowing what to do after their mother’s death, left with three girls he had to raise on his own. They had governesses, of course, and all sorts of servants who helped, but what they lacked was a mother. Gavin had to be father and mother both for them and it crushed him, the thought that he couldn’t step into his wife’s role satisfactorily.

No matter how many times Samuel had reassured him all his girls had been raised to be perfect young women, Gavin still had his concerns he had somehow, inadvertently, hurt them.

Our fears arenae so different, after all.

Leaning closer, Samuel bridged the gap between him and Alicia and captured her lips in a soft kiss, swallowing the soft sigh she let out against his mouth. She truly was perfect, he thought, in every way. Not only beautiful, with her long dark hair and dark eyes, nothing but mystery and allure lurking in their depths, but also sweet and caring and kind—and perhaps cleverer than her own good. How could he possibly resist her?

For a few moments, both of them were silent, gazing into each other’s eyes. Samuel found that he could get lost in Alicia’s gaze, staring at her for hours and hours, but before long, she dragged her hands down his torso and grabbed his hands, a mischievous look in her eyes as she dragged him towards the door, much to his suspicion.

“Where are we goin’?” he asked, raising a curious eyebrow.

“I have an idea,” Alicia said, which could only mean trouble. Alicia’s ideas were never good, and Samuel should not be encouraging this behavior, but he couldn’t help the intrigue bubbling up inside him. He wanted to see where she wanted to take him, and so he followed, after she had quickly dressed, letting Alicia drag him through the castle and out into the courtyard. “There is a loch here, is there nae? Near the walls?”

“Aye,” said Samuel, now more confused than ever. “Is that where we are goin’?”

Alicia nodded, and when Samuel came to a halt, pulling her to a stop next to him, she asked, “Dae ye trust me?”

“O’ course I dae,” said Samuel without hesitation, but he wasn’t fond of the idea of water, especially so late at night, when he could hardly see anything.

“Then come with me.”

It was all Alicia said before she began to drag him along once more, Samuel waving the guards aside as they passed. This would be the talk of the castle the following day, he knew, but he hoped none of it would reach Gavin’s ears before he had had the chance to tell him himself.

The lake Alicia wished to visit sat only a short walk from the castle, its surface glittering under the light of the moon. It was neither large nor deep, but it was still big enough for a person to drown in its depths, and Samuel’s heart stuttered in his chest, the rhythm breaking up erratically as they neared it.

Alicia, though, was a calm presence next to him, guiding him along the way.

When they reached the bank, Alicia came to a stop and turned to face him, her pale skin luminous under the moonlight, her smile radiant. She said nothing as she slowly began to undress, taking off her garments one by one and carefully laying them over the grass until she was nude, her skin erupting in goosebumps under the chill of the breeze. Samuel had the instinct to cover her now that they were outside, but he refrained from doing so when she was so comfortable in her own skin around him, instead choosing to admire the swell of her curves, as sensual as they were seductive, punctuated by the soft light of the moon.

“I dinnae want ye tae fear the water,” she whispered as her hands found his chest once more, palms splaying over it before she began to tug off his own clothes. “Will ye swim with me? There is naething tae fear, ye will see.”

Samuel hesitated, though he didn’t try to stop Alicia from removing his clothes. He wasn’t particularly excited at the prospect of getting into freezing cold waters in the middle of the night, but it was better than leaving Alicia in the water alone, so he nodded, even if a little reluctantly. By the time Alicia removed the last of his clothing, he was mostly distracted by her looks, tracking the lines and curves of her body with his gaze—the way her dark hair fell over her shoulders, the hardened nubs of her nipples, the shape of her buttocks. He wanted to reach out and touch her, pull her into his arms and never let her go.

Instead, before he knew it, Alicia jumped into the lake and Samuel had no choice but to follow. The moment his skin met the water, his breath was punched out of his lungs and his skin stung with the cold, the low temperature seeping all the way into his bones. Next to him, Alicia let out a sound that was half a gasp and half a laugh, as if the temperature had surprised her too and stolen her breath.

Quickly, Samuel swam over to her and pulled her into his arms in an attempt to keep her warm. Alicia snuggled close to him, but the less they were moving, the colder the water seemed, and soon, she pulled back from him just enough to swim a little, moving in circles around him.

“See? It isnae bad at all,” she said.

“It’s cold,” Samuel pointed out.

“O’ course it’s cold!” said Alicia, as if it was not only to be expected, but also tolerated. “But it’s also safe. Naething will happen tae me here.”

Alicia was a seasoned swimmer, Samuel knew, but that didn’t lessen his concern. He watched her for a few moments as he swam in the same spot, making sure to always keep an eye on her, but just as he had been fine that day when the bee had stung him, now Alicia was perfectly fine swimming.

There were no foes there to drown her, and she was skilled enough to be in no danger in the water. Samuel had to understand that, he knew. He had to fight his fear just as he had asked Alicia to fight hers.

When Alicia came close to him once more, Samuel grabbed her by the waist and pulled her even closer. His other hand cradled her cheek, the skin there warmer than his palm or the rest of her. “Thank ye,” he said softly, stealing a quick kiss from her.

“Why are ye thankin’ me?” Alicia asked.

“Fer all this,” said Samuel. “Fer helpin’ me. I… I still fear, Alicia. I fear somethin’ will happen tae ye. I fear Colm MacLaine will dae… somethin’. I dinnae ken what, but he is capable o’ many things an’ it seems he is after me again. An’ I cannae lose ye. I cannae. I love ye too much tae lose ye.”

A part of him had died along with his son that fateful day. Another part of him had died along with his wife. He didn’t know how many more parts of himself he had to give before there was nothing left of him at all.

“I am fine an’ I am here,” Alicia said. “Naething will happen tae me because ye an’ Faither will protect me. I truly believe that, Samuel. Ye willnae let any harm come tae me, will ye?”

“O’ course I willnae,” Samuel promised, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

“Then there is naething tae fear.”

There was a finality in Alicia’s tone that was almost comforting, leaving no room for doubt or argument. It was easy to believe her then. It was easy to believe that everything would be fine, regardless of hardships, regardless of enemies.

It was the kind of optimism Samuel never held, but which he appreciated in Alicia. He loved that she could still see the bright side of things and in that moment, he vowed to always keep that optimism alive.

As she held onto his shoulders, Samuel’s hands found her hips under the water just as their lips met in a kiss, soft and tender, but quickly turning passionate. When Alicia moaned against his lips, all Samuel wanted was to make her repeat that sound again and again and again.