A Kingdom of Lies (Realm of Fey #2)

CHAPTER 3

Magic sparked across my hands. Rings of sharp, crackling ice turned my skin a violent white. I let it devour me, forging my fist into a weapon of jagged ice, only to melt and reform over and over.

The power didn’t conform. It spread with wild intention, devouring the brick wall beneath my fingers and my boots. If I didn’t focus, the magic would soon spread across the room entirely until it glittered in silver and white. Part of me wanted to let go of my control, to allow my emotions to storm outwards until I felt some space within me for more positive thoughts.

Instead, as I listened to Gyah and Althea discuss our pending journey, I held the magic at bay. My full energy would be required soon enough, even if Althea’s warning still echoed through me. The day had melted into late afternoon, yet the hours between this morning’s discussions had not dampened the threats that came with it.

Welhaven is recognised as the creation point of the fey at the beginning of time. The land is unclaimed by any of the four Courts, and thus may not be a place for war, hate, or the spilling of blood. It is sacred land and was historically used as a neutral ground for disagreements between the Courts to be discussed peacefully.

It made sense as to why Queen Lyra wanted my meeting with Doran to be there. A way of ensuring he didn’t go against the law of the land and anger his God. Yet deep down I knew there was nothing stopping me from unleashing this storm, not if the moment required it. After all, I would petition Doran to give back my father peacefully, or I would pry him from Doran’s cold, dead hands.

“… then our focus may return to our shared enemy, the Hand.”

I looked back at Gyah who spoke, running the whetstone across her sword.

“We have not heard from him since the Passing.” Althea shifted on her seat, visibly disturbed by the mention of the mysterious figure who hid within the human realm of Durmain. “Nor have our guards sent word of Hunters… or the warped, powered humans that we saw weeks ago.”

“They haven’t just disappeared,” Gyah added, not taking her focus from the edge of her sword. She flicked her thumb across the metal, inspecting just how sharp it was. “They will return. My suggestion is, we don’t wait for them to make the first move. Little is known about this Hand and his creations. It is pure luck he has stepped back from the forefront of our minds whilst we deal with the more… immediate threats this side of the border.”

“I know what you are doing, Gyah,” Althea said, one brow raised as she surveyed the Cedarfall soldier.

Gyah shrugged her broad shoulders as if she didn’t know what Althea suggested. But even I knew. Gyah hadn’t withdrawn her request to join the frontline and monitor the Wychwood border alongside the Cedarfall soldiers. Since the powered human had walked through the Mists of Deyalnar, Queen Lyra had sent countless numbers of her legion to prevent another from stepping through alive. Gyah wished to be there, doing her duty, not babysitting a capable princess.

But since Briar had disappeared, it was safer for Althea not to be alone. The assassin, like the Hand’s powered humans, would also return.

We all knew that Gyah wanted to join the efforts with a burning desire. She’d made that very clear. And yet, whilst other enemies still lingered in the shadows, it was important we had an Eldrae close by. Her ability to shift into a wyvern was rare, which made her presence paramount.

“There will come a time when I am required to be there, Althea,” Gyah said, looking up from her weapon for only a moment. “There are many others capable and skilled to protect you.”

“And until that time I am going to need you by my side,” Althea replied curtly. “Why settle for anything less than the best?”

Gyah blushed, turning her head to the side to hide the reaction. But what I noticed from Althea’s words was there was something that troubled her deeply. It had her losing herself to dark thoughts which devoured her in quiet moments. Althea did it now, fixating her gaze on a spot on the floor. Gyah briefly looked to me, both of us sharing our concern with a single glance.

“Does she frighten you, Althea?” I asked, sitting with them in the small circle we created.

There wasn’t a need to speak the name aloud for fear of triggering Althea.

“Nothing has the power to cause me fear, Robin.” Althea snapped her gaze to mine. She almost spat flame with the sudden reaction. “I only hope Briar is foolish enough to come and see me. There is much I have to say to her when she finally decides to show her face again.”

“And she will.” Gyah narrowed her golden eyes, the skin around them pinched into the pattern of crow’s feet.

“You said that no one disappears forever, but the Children of the Asp have never been found. I want to find their burrow and burn it from the inside.” I winced as heat radiated from the princess’s skin. Gyah noticed it too. I’d never thought it possible to see a person spit flame but could tell it was moments away from happening.

“You could encourage her out of the shadows, if you offered the right amount of coin then surely the assassins would show themselves again?” I said, clenching my hands into fists to call in the power that gloved them.

They both turned to face me at the same time.

“What are you suggesting?” Althea asked, curiosity dripping from her tone.

“The Asps kill because of coin; Briar made that clear. Would there not be a way of putting forward an abundance of money that would even entice an assassin out of retirement? It doesn’t need to be Briar who presents herself, only another sloppy initiate. Then we can find the burrow. Follow the lone Asp until it returns to its nest.”

“Just like that, aye?” Gyah scoffed.

There were other reasons I could want the help of an assassin. Perhaps, if Doran refused what I had to say to him, I would find a way to hire one myself.

I gritted my teeth, growing bored of my ideas being brushed aside. “Yes, just like that. Unless you have a better suggestion. I’m sure we would all love to hear it.”

Gyah forced a smile before returning to the sword across her lap.

I watched Althea contemplate my words. Her stare was lost to a painting on the wall behind me.

“Anyway, how is it we went from having an Asp at every corner before the Passing, but now there has not even been a whisper of one?” I said.

“Their benefactor had his head caved in by…” Althea cut herself off as she glanced at me. The name was on the tip of her tongue.

Flashes of his bloodied fists and twisted face of anger filled my head. “Erix.”

Althea swallowed her next words, changing the course of the conversation before I could dwell on his loss of control for another moment. “If I was to gather the funds to put forward then I would need Mother’s involvement. I may be a Cedarfall, but I cannot simply walk into the royal bank and demand the papers required. Such decisions and commands are not as simple as that. I hardly imagine Mother would allow it; finding Briar is not exactly on her list of current importance.”

Althea was right. Our conversations bounced between the Hand or King Doran. The guild of assassins was solely a topic of discussion that kept our small group distracted from those other matters. That and the fact that Althea felt scorned and used; I’d come to learn those two emotions didn’t sit well with the Cedarfall Princess.

“Could I help fund it?” I asked. The idea of having access to money was strange and new. It was still incredibly hard to imagine.

Althea’s gaze brightened for a moment. “Perhaps. The Icethorn court should have access to coin, however it has been many years since anyone occupied the capital of Icethorn. The Court’s vault has likely been ransacked during your family’s… absence. Without visiting it’s impossible to know whether the funds survived the storm, or if they were stolen during it.”

And for that, we had to leave Farrador. Except we couldn’t, not with King Doran’s desire to capture Erix, making visiting anywhere but this castle impossible.

There was much to being a king that I’d not had the luxury of uncovering yet. Queen Lyra encouraged the idea of creating a council who’d help with my future ruling, since I had close to no idea how to rule anything besides a ramshackle pub, and those days were long gone.

Surrounding myself with people who had knowledge on courtly affairs and what it meant to be a ruler was a good idea. But creating a council required finding people who wished to see me take my place within Icethorn. So far the Council consisted of myself and Eroan – the seamster who dressed me – and I couldn’t imagine the gentle threadmaster had much experience in courtly matters beside what they would have worn during important meetings. However, Eroan had been the only fey from Icethorn who had shown interest in returning.

I was a king of one.

Erix’s voice filled my head, echoing amongst my anxieties. A king of one is still a king.

“When this is all over with Doran and his attention is diverted from me, then I will leave for Icethorn. I cannot be expected to hide within Farrador’s walls forever. I have a responsibility now, I just need the chance to locate it.”

“Hear, hear,” Gyah cheered. “If I cannot visit the Wychwood border, then I require an excuse to stretch my wings.”

“A little trip may be exactly what is required,” Althea agreed, a fleeting smile flittering across her face. “I was never one for sitting still. And castle life is rather dull. It was why I left and threw myself into the missions of infiltrating Hunter camps and taking back the stolen fey. Gives life more purpose, you know? Makes it less boring.”

“Life is far from boring.” The comment slipped out of me without much thought. Deep down a small part of me would have traded this all for the chance of being back in Grove, sleeping in bed after a long shift at the tavern. My shoulders were less heavy, the burden almost non-existent.

“Could be worse.” Althea nudged my knee with her own. “You might never have met us.”

That conjured a smile, a small but genuine one that warmed my chest. Althea was right. I had never had friends like them before.

“Or me.” Our heads snapped towards the door to my chamber to see Erix leaning up against the frame. His arms were crossed, his chest standing out prominently through the formfitting black top he still wore from our morning training.

Althea rolled her eyes, gesturing with a nod towards Gyah. “And that is our cue to leave.”

“Oh, do not rush out on my behalf,” Erix purred, striding into the room with his chin held high. “I just got here.”

“Exactly, Erix,” Althea said, turning her focus to me. “Robin, I suggest you get some rest tonight. You are going to need a clear head for tomorrow.”

“I will try.”

Althea raised a brow, her expression smug and knowing. “Say the word and I will dismiss him for the evening. I don’t imagine the nights are restful with your personal guard warming the bed.”

“Or messing up the bedsheets,” Gyah added.

I leaned into Althea, mischief twisting in my chest. “Believe me, I have always slept better in a warm bed. And even if you dismissed him, do you truly believe he would listen to your command?”

“Not at all.” The corner of her lip tugged upwards as she exhaled a light chuckle. “Gyah, I am going to need a drink to remove a certain image from my brain.”

Erix cleared his throat, a sly grin creeping up his cheeks. “Thinking about me, princess?”

Gyah’s chortled laugh was a mix between a bark and a grunt. “Actually, I think we will need more than one drink.”

I woke to darkness. It was not noise that roused me, but the shifting of Erix’s hard body as he peeled himself away from me. For a moment it felt as though we’d only just fallen asleep, but a single glance towards the endless black beyond the window told me otherwise.

“Where are you going?” I asked, voice croaky. Rolling over, I was met with the outline of Erix’s bare back. He sat on the edge of the bed, just out of reach.

“You should go back to sleep,” he replied softly.

“Then join me,” I said, reaching out, fingers grazing his back.

Erix shrugged me off, his head turning enough to the side that I could see his sharp jaw and taut expression. I pushed myself up and crawled over until I was behind him on my knees. Reaching out again, I let my fingers trace the curve of his shoulder. This time he let me touch him. His skin was cold and coated in gooseflesh. Erix shivered as I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and brought my lips towards his ear.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, already knowing the answer but being unable to shy away from it.

“My mind is just… busy. That’s all. Robin, please. Go back to sleep. I will be okay.”

“Firstly, you’re not permitted to tell me what to do. Secondly, are we back to using my name, because I was beginning to enjoy the nickname.”

My attempt to lighten the tension worked, evident as Erix sighed slowly. Two strong arms snaked around me and in one great motion I was sitting upon his lap, nothing but his firm hands holding me in place. Erix had a tendency to sleep without the constraints of clothing, however I noticed he wore trousers.

“Are you planning on leaving me?”

“I could never leave you, little bird.” His nose pressed against my own as two strong hands ran down my back and cupped my hips. “I just could not sleep and needed some fresh air. I thought a walk would help. I never meant to wake you.”

So that was why he was so cold.

I looked beyond the window, the sky pure obsidian – not even the stars had come out, hiding behind the dense, winter clouds that drifted through the night.

“Well, I’m awake now. And I command that you take off your trousers and get back into bed.”

Erix pouted, fingers slipping and gripping slightly harder upon my butt. “Then as your personal guard I would have to obey.”

“Good. Then stay.” I pressed a small kiss upon his face, inches beside his lips.

It should have alarmed me how quickly his demeaner changed. One moment his expression was distant, but the next it sparked with emotion as though there had never been a problem.

“Do you have any other requests for me? I am awake, after all… perhaps a walk is not the only activity that would clear my mind.”

I didn’t want to acknowledge what worried him, because the same thought also filled my mind. Morning was not far away and with it came the meeting with King Doran. Erix would stay behind, as agreed, and let me petition for the safety of everyone I cared about.

Clearly, he struggled with that idea. But he had to learn to trust me, just as I trusted him.

“Hmm,” I replied, voice light and full of innocence. “Now, what else could we do? I can’t think of anything else but sleep…”

That was, in fact, a lie. There was something else we could do – something that would distract us both.

“That is a shame.” Erix stood from the bed, picking me up with him. My legs wrapped around his middle to keep myself aloft. His hold was unwavering, hands still splayed and firmly grasping my ass. He moved away from the bed, my stomach jolting with sudden excitement.

“Because my mind is full of ideas,” he finished. “Would you like me to share them with you?”

Erix stopped only when my back was pressed up against the wall. There was something thrilling about sharing the night with him. It was as though the fear of darkness vanished when he touched me.

It was easy to keep a hold of his eye contact for the silver glint pierced through even the darkest of shadows. Although I enjoyed the moments in the dark, when only my sense of touch was useful.

“Erix?” I said.

“Yes, little bird,” he replied, so close to me his breath tickled my cheek.

“Why did you offer yourself up so freely?” I asked, as though the volume of my question determined the mood of the room. I’d not braved the question yet. There was nothing good about this time to ask it, but then there never would be.

Erix didn’t reply straight away. Instead, he leaned into me, nestling his face into my neck, pressing his lips to my skin. It was a good distraction technique, but I read his actions for what they were.

Erix was hiding from me.

“I know what you are doing, Erix,” I said.

“Please.” His voice was muffled as his mouth pressed into my neck. “Can we talk about something else?”

I gripped the back of his head and tried to pry him from me. “Only if you promise to never do it again. Never say you will leave me so easily. You are supposed to be my constant. I cannot imagine a time when you would not be.”

Erix’s lips stilled on my skin, teeth grazing slightly, enough to cause a shiver to race up my spine. He leaned back enough that his reply was clear when he spoke. I wished he hadn’t, because his expression was twisted in turmoil. “How do you look at me and see someone who does not deserve pain for what I have done?”

The air stilled at the sudden depth of his voice.

“You did what you had to do.”

You killed Tarron because of what he did to me.

“Did I?” Erix interjected so quickly it snatched my breath away. “It could have ended differently. Tarron deserved to suffer, but I took that possibility away during my mindless loss of control. Deciding who lives, and who dies, is not my decision to make. I… I lost control.”

Erix dropped me slowly until I was standing on the ground, no longer supported by his hungry hands. He stepped back from me, face obscured by the lack of moonlight. Part of me wanted to reach for him, to apologise for ruining the moment, to beg for him to return his lips to my skin.

I didn’t. There was no hiding from this anymore.

“What can I do to help you ease this burden, Erix?”

Erix turned his back on me, stepping away. “You cannot offer me what I require. No one can.”

“And what is that? If you know I can’t give you reprieve, then you know what you are looking for,” I said, voice breaking slightly. “Perhaps you should give me the chance to help you instead of turning your back on the possibility that someone else can help you carry your burden. Tell me, Erix, what can I give you that will help?”

“Forgiveness. Not from you. From the people who are no longer walking this realm to give it.”

Silence thrummed painfully, the cord finally snapping after days of unspoken tension. “Then you will punish yourself until the end of days searching for such a thing.”

“If that is my penance, then I must pay it. But there is something I can do that will lighten the burden. If I return myself to the Oakstorm Court and right my wrong by ensuring you have your father back, that will lighten the load.”

“No, my answer stays the same.” I raised a hand and placed it upon his upper arm, stopping him from moving any further away. It lasted all but a moment before he shrugged me off.

“You do not know me. Not entirely.” It was impossible not to hear the undercurrents of deep sadness as he spoke. “You either do not wish to see what I am, or you are ignorant to it.”

“I do know you,” I snapped, unable to hold it in. “I have explored far more with you than I have with another before.”

“What I am and who I am are two starkly different things. It was a mistake ever getting this close to you. I had to feel a connection that I had not in a long time. A silly dream. And it now ends the same way as it did before.” Erix faced me slowly, his eyes glazed with tears, not a single one brave enough to take the first fall. “After tomorrow I retire as your personal guard. How can I keep you safe from others if I am not confident that I can keep you safe from me?”

I shook my head, confusion mixing with annoyance. “I have never heard something more ridiculous in my life. Stop speaking in riddles, Erix. It is late and you are clearly tired. Can we please just talk this through tomorrow morning? When our minds are clear and we are rested. It is always harder to face our anxieties in the dark of night. I promise, this will be easier come dawn.”

Erix just stood there and stared at me, shadows creating shapes across his face. “Ask me what I am.”

“No, it doesn’t matter.” I shouted. My breathing grew frantic, chest rising and falling in an awkward, unnatural rhythm. “I refuse to play this game, Erix. It’s not what you are, but who you are that matters.”

“Ask me,” Erix snarled, his eyes darkening.

I didn’t flinch away, but the urge was simmering.

I shook my head, unable to look into his wide, panicked eyes. “I said no.”

“Robin.” His voice deepened, his fists balled. “Ask me.”

“No!” My shout was muffled by a rush of frozen air that exploded outwards. It silenced Erix, snatching away those same two words he was about to repeat. As he studied me and the curling of freezing mists that danced at my feet, it was not with fear… It was with something else entirely. “I do not care to know what it is you think is so deeply important. What you are, Erix, is the gentle soul who saved me from the Hunters and helped me through this unexpected and frankly unwanted transition in my life. You are not a result of your actions. Do you hear me?”

I waited for him to reply, to say something… anything that would take back this entire evening. There was a part of me that wished I had the capacity to sleep without him by my side.

“Then I ask that you promise me one thing,” Erix began, his deep voice gruff with emotion. Even in the dim light I could see the sharp rise and fall of his shoulders as he also struggled to even out his breathing.

I had heard enough. “Erix, it’s time we try and sleep.”

“Robin, please .” It was the use of my name that stilled my refusal to listen. “Tomorrow, no matter what happens, I want you to know that I will forever be sorry. Sorry for what I have done. Sorry for what I will no doubt do again. I hope you see me for the man you have come to know, and not the monster I have fought hard to hide.”

I couldn’t find the words to answer him.

Then, Erix left the room, leaving behind his shirt and boots in his desperation to flee. And worst of all, I didn’t stop him. Not that I had the chance.

Bathed in darkness as my guard dismissed himself from my presence, I was numb to the core. I opened my mouth to call his name, to demand that he return to me at once. But no sound came out. I failed to even catch a confident breath. All I could do was listen to the slap of Erix’s feet as he left me behind, until only silence and emptiness accompanied me within my chambers.