A Little Secret (The Little Things #4)

Chapter 16

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

FINLEY

I ncessant buzzing rouses me from sleep. Peeling my eyelids open, I search the dark room, feeling like I’m being pinned to the mattress by a dead body. Nope. It’s only Griffin’s arm.

Holy shit, it’s Griffin’s arm. I’m in bed with Griffin.

Flashes from earlier tonight—er, last night?—rise to the surface. I can’t believe I kissed Griff. I can’t believe he rejected me. I can’t believe I slept beside him after he rejected me.

Shit.

The buzzing continues while I try to piece together the here and now instead of drowning in the hazy memory of last night. My phone’s on the nightstand. Its screen glows in the pitch black room, blinding me. Slipping out from beneath him, I reach for it, silence the call, and tiptoe into the bathroom to answer it.

“Hello?” I whisper.

“Where the hell are you?” my brother snaps.

I pull the phone away from my ear before bringing it back. “Why hello to you, too, Oscar. ”

“It’s Everett.”

“I know it’s you.” I roll my eyes. “I called you Oscar because you’re acting like Oscar the Grouch, which is kind of ironic since you're supposedly on a beach sipping Pina Coladas with your hot girlfriend, so why the hell are you calling me?” I fight a yawn, adding, “And what time is it?”

“Maybe because I'm not on vacation anymore,” he replies. “I’m at the house, and you aren’t here.”

My forehead scrunches, and I wipe at my tired eyes, trying to convince my brain to wake up and compute this conversation. “Why are you at the house? I thought you and the guys were flying straight to Minnesota for the away games after New Year’s, then coming back with the team?”

“Mom and Dad told me about the seizure,” he mutters. The bastard sounds almost apologetic for gossiping behind my back, but it isn’t enough to let him off the hook.

Leaning my shoulder against the bathroom wall, I grumble, “Should’ve known they’d blabber to you.”

“You still haven’t answered my question. Where are you? And where the hell is Griff? He was supposed to have his meeting this morning.”

My heart ratchets at the mention of Griffin. “Meeting?”

“Yeah. With the Tornadoes.”

The Tornadoes is the NHL team Griffin signed with during his senior year of high school. He’ll play for them after this season. Well, if he plays well on the farm team next season. Man, how time flies. The reminder is bittersweet, and I peek through the barely cracked open bathroom door.

The first rays of morning light filter through the blackout curtains, highlighting Griffin’s strong arms and bare chest. The same chest I snuggled up against all night. I’m still not sure how it happened. How I wound up spilling all of my insecurities, kissing him, and managing to fall asleep in his arms after he politely ended the said kiss, even though I’m pretty sure I would’ve gone all the way with him in a heartbeat. It was a mistake, obviously, but I can’t make myself regret it despite his rejection. I needed to be held, and he welcomed me with open arms. No hesitation. No conditions. Just him and me and a night I’ll never forget.

I tear my attention from the man’s muscular forearm tossed over his eyes and attempt to focus on my conversation. “Why was he supposed to meet with the Tornadoes?”

“Technically, we don’t know since he hasn’t met with them yet, but there was an injury during last week’s game, and since they’re well within range of the Stanley Cup, and Griffin plays Caruthers’ position, and Griffin’s been killing it this season, well, I have a hunch.”

“Spell it out for me, then,” I push. “You know how I feel about all the hockey mumbo jumbo.”

“I think the Tornadoes want him to pull out of the rest of LAU’s season and move straight to the bench so he can fill in for Caruthers.”

“What?” I ask. “I didn’t think that was possible.”

“It’s rare but not impossible,” he clarifies.

“Passing up on his degree, let alone missing out on the last quarter of his NCAA career? That’s…that’s a big deal, isn’t it?”

“It’s huge, which is why I was surprised neither of you are here,” he says, bringing up his original reason for calling.

Oh. Right.

I clear my throat. “Yeah, that’s…strange, isn’t it.”

“Finley,” he warns.

My expression pinches. “Oo, someone’s bossy today.”

“I’m always bossy. Now, where are you? ”

“Griffin drove me to see Drew.”

“Why?”

I grimace, considering all the things I could say and how much they would piss Everett off if he heard them. Oh, you know, I’m kinda sorta pregnant, and Griffin twisted my arm into telling the father face to face, but it blew up in my face, and now I’m going to be a single mom forever. Yay me. Oh, and PS, I also kissed your best friend last night and slept next to him, so that’s new.

“Fin?” Everett prods.

I clear my throat and try to choose my next words carefully. “I, uh, I had a hunch Drew was cheating on me, and I wanted to talk to him face to face, and since my driver’s license is now suspended thanks to my seizure Mom and Dad blabbered to you about, the next best thing was to…swing by.” I cringe as the words roll off my tongue.

“Swing by?” Everett laughs. “Swing by is a thirty-minute drive. An hour, tops. Drew lives across multiple states, Finley. That isn’t a quick drop-in kind of visit. You don’t just swing by?—”

“Wrap it up, Everett. It’s early, and I’m too tired for this conversation.”

“Someone’s sassy today,” he notes, twisting my own words back at me.

“Someone woke up to a grouchy phone call.”

“Because someone flew home early from their vacation to check on you,” he volleys back at me.

“Fine,” I grumble. “Unnecessary, but thank you for being sweet and ending your vacation early even though you most definitely could’ve called like a normal human being.”

“You’re welcome,” he answers shamelessly. “Besides, it was supposed to rain for the rest of the trip, so we weren’t missing too much. Figured flying back with the girls and checking on you was the way to go.”

I snort. “Gee, thanks.”

“It also doesn’t hurt that Raine misses her family,” he adds. “Not sure what we’re gonna do next season with the Rockets.”

“You mean, other than kick butt and make a splash in the NHL?”

“And take her from her family,” he mutters.

“Whoa, there. Trouble in paradise, big brother?”

“Nah, we’re good. It’s just…I dunno.”

“Come on,” I push, grateful for the topic change. “Pretty sure being a solid sounding board is part of any little sister’s resume. Spit it out.”

“I dunno,” he repeats. “Her ex was good at keeping her from her family. And I know it was always the plan for me to move away and play for the Rockets, but I don’t wanna do the same thing. Not when they’re finally on good terms again.”

Despite Everett not being able to see me, I find myself nodding. He’s right. Raine’s ex was an abusive asshole who gave her crap anytime she wanted to see her family, so she stopped seeing them. I don’t think it happened overnight or anything, but sometimes it’s easier to avoid fights than to wade through them. With Raine coming around her family more now, I can see why she might be hesitant to move across the country to be with Everett.

“You’re nothing like Drake, though,” I remind him. “And besides, there are airplanes, right? I have no doubt you’ll bring her back to Lockwood Heights every chance you get.”

“Yeah, that’s true.” He sighs. “But now, she’s working with her dad, and…” Another sigh escapes him. “When are you coming home? ”

“Subtle subject change,” I quip. “And today. We should be home around dinner time.”

“Sounds good. I’ll make you guys something to eat.”

“Don’t bother. We can grab food on the way.”

“You sure?”

“Yup. No big deal.”

“All right. By the way, I know you two have been teetering for a while. How did it go?”

“It?” I squeak. The blood drains from my face as I imagine telling him all the sordid details of what it feels like to kiss his best friend when he interrupts my spiraling thoughts.

“Confronting Drew,” he clarifies.

My body sags against the doorjamb. “Oh.”

“What did you think I was talking about?” Everett demands.

“Nothing,” I lie. “And it went…about as shitty as you would expect.” I rub my tired eyes again and replay the last twenty-four hours. The drive. The fight. Drew’s callousness. Me slapping him.

“And?” my brother prods.

“We broke up.”

It’s such a simple statement. Like the sky is blue or caffeine is life. Leaning my back against the counter, I wait for the sting of betrayal to hit me, but it doesn’t. All I feel is…the slight tingle of my lips.

“So, he was cheating on you?” Everett prods.

He.

As in, Drew.

Right.

“Technically, he says nothing happened,” I offer, “but a girl can read between the lines, you know?”

“Fuck him,” my brother curses. “I never liked him anyway. ”

My lips curve up. “That, you made very clear.”

“Yeah, well, I was right, like always.”

“So humble,” I note.

“It’s genetic,” he quips, pulling another quiet laugh from me before he adds, “Besides. This’ll be good for you.”

“What will be good for me?”

“To take a break from guys and focus on yourself. You were with the asshat for so long you never even had the chance to be young and stupid and reckless. Fuck the responsibilities that come with relationships and do your own thing.”

“Says the guy who's head over heels for Raine,” I toss back at him.

“She’s different,” he argues. “And I’m older than you. Actually, Raine and I are both older than you.”

“Age is only a number, brother.”

“I’m just saying there’s nothing wrong with enjoying life without needing a guy by your side twenty-four-seven. Do you even know what it’s like to be single? You have your entire life to settle down and fall in love. You should enjoy the lack of responsibility. The freedom. The time to be selfish and only think about you. You’ve never had it.”

I’ll never have it. Not anymore. The realization is bittersweet. I look down at my stomach, well aware it looks the exact same way as it did two months ago. This isn’t about me any more. None of this is. It’s about my baby.

I’m going to have a baby.

Deep breath, Fin , I remind myself.

Reading my silence as confirmation that my heart is hurting, Everett adds, “Don’t let the asshole get you down. You might’ve been with him for years, but let’s be honest. Most of that time was spent with you two fighting.”

“Not most of the time,” I defend, no matter how pointless it is. He’s right. Drew and I fought. A lot. The reminder makes me feel like I’m the failure. The one who was unreasonable. Who screwed up. Who was too stubborn to acknowledge that maybe we weren’t a good fit for each other anymore. Maybe I'm not a good fit for anyone anymore.

“Whatever you say, Fin,” Everett mutters. “All I’m saying is he was dead weight. You should celebrate.”

I roll my eyes. “Celebrate, huh?”

“Yeah. Celebrate,” he repeats. “What do you say we have a Game Night tonight? It’s New Year’s Eve. Might as well help the friends lick their wounds since we had to come home early, and it’ll help get your mind off things. It might even be the last one Griffin attends if my hunch is right about the meeting, and he was able to reschedule it.”

The reminder of Griffin missing his meeting and my part in it leaves a dull ache inside me. Why would he do that? Why would he potentially piss off the Tornadoes? Is that why he ended the kiss before it had a chance to turn into anything else? Because he knows he’s leaving sooner rather than later? Not that the timeline matters. He’s moving. Whether it’s today or a month from now or even after graduation. He has a life ahead of him. A life he’s worked so damn hard for, and he deserves my support.

“I think it’s a great idea,” I announce. “A Game Night.”

“Perfect. I’ll tell Reeves to get the ball rolling. Drive safe, yeah?”

“We will. And, Ev?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for being awesome.”

“Love you, too, Fin.”

The call ends, and I set my phone on the counter, grasping the edge of the cool surface. I don’t want to go back to bed. The idea of snuggling next to Griffin is a bad idea, especially after the reality check with Ev, but climbing into cold sheets feels like I’m succumbing to my lackluster future. I peek through the cracked door again, giving myself a minute to appreciate Griffin in all his shirtless glory. Moving toward the shower, I turn the stupid thing to its hottest setting, rest my forehead against the cold tile, and wait for the water to heat up.

My pajamas smell like him. Like the guy I slept next to. He’s leaving. He has to leave. He has plans. Plans I’ve known about for years. Plans he’s worked so hard for. Plans that have nothing to do with me, and honestly, that’s okay. Besides, I’m the one who climbed into his bed. Who threw myself at him. And even though it was a pretty epic kiss last night, maybe that’s all it needs to be. All it should be.

A kiss.

I mean, he’s the one who pulled away first. He probably already knows pursuing something is a bad idea. It just took me a minute longer to come to the same conclusion. That’s all.

I put my hand under the spray, strip down to my birthday suit, and step into the shower, letting the liquid heat flow down my body before grabbing the soap and washing every inch of me.

My brother’s right about one thing. I’ve never been alone, and now that I have a baby inside of me, I never will be. But that’s okay. And so is accepting my situation with Griffin.