A Matchmaking Mismatch (Romance Retold #3)

Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

N or was there any mistaking the way Topher held Miss Devenish’s hand within his, clasped up by his chest in a manner that left little doubt of their relationship. Far from repulsing Topher’s intimacy, Miss Devenish was looking up into his eyes, a shy smile on her lips. A quick glance told Ruth that Miss Parkham and Mrs. Devenish were walking together, ahead of Topher and Miss Devenish, who seemed to have stopped when they came upon the obliging grove of trees.

Ruth pulled at the reins, slowing her horse to a bare walk, unable to take her eyes from the scene before her as panic welled inside her. All of Topher’s time away from Upper Brook Street, his abnormally good humor, his unwillingness to tell her anything of his activities during their stay in Town…was this truly what he had been at? Courting Miss Devenish?

How foolish Ruth had been to assume his good humor was merely a result of being in Town! She should have noticed before what she saw now, clear as day: the flush of infatuation.

She swung down from her horse, tugging it along with her as she swallowed down the bile rising in her throat.

“Franks!” she said as she came upon them.

Their heads whipped around, and unwelcome surprise immediately shadowed Topher’s eyes.

“Mr. Ruth,” said Miss Devenish, showing far less embarrassment than Topher. “We meet again.”

Ruth forced a smile. “Indeed. It is always a pleasure to come upon you, Miss Devenish.” That was certainly an untruth in this situation, but Ruth wasn’t so angry to realize that Miss Devenish bore no blame here. “I am afraid I have to spirit Mr. Franks away from you, though. We have an engagement that we cannot forgo.” She resisted the impulse to seize her brother’s arm and perhaps drag him behind her horse through the Park.

Topher looked at her warily but nodded. “Just so. I must have lost track of the time. Allow me to accompany you back to your mother and Miss Parkham.”

“No,” Ruth said blankly. Realizing how authoritative she sounded, she forced a brittle-sounding chuckle. “It looks as though they are waiting for you, Miss Devenish.” She nodded to indicate where the two women stood twenty yards distant.

Ruth and Topher both executed their bows, and Miss Devenish sent the latter a smile that made Ruth’s stomach plummet to the ground. Heaven help all of them. She didn’t dare consider the ramifications of what she had just witnessed.

When Miss Devenish had disappeared, Ruth swung around toward her horse. Her jaw was so tightly clenched, she didn’t know if she could have spoken even if she wanted to. As it was, she had no desire to treat everyone at the Park to the display Topher would be subjected to when they arrived back in Upper Brook Street.

He seemed to sense that trouble was brewing and forbore speaking with Ruth. Everything within her pushed her to ride the remainder of the way at a gallop, but Topher was on foot, and she had to content herself with keeping a pace that forced him to take long strides, interspersed with a few skips here and there to keep up.

She said nothing as she handed the horse off to the groom, and maintained her silence as they walked up the three steps to the townhouse, nor did she say a word as they scaled the stairs inside. Not until the door closed behind them in Topher’s bedchamber did she turn toward her twin.

“Have you lost your senses?”

He sighed and pulled off his hat. “ I know , Ruth. She is so far above my reach that it seems like madness! But she loves me. And I love her.”

Ruth tossed her hat onto the bed and rubbed her forehead harshly, not trusting herself to say anything even approaching civility to her brother. She felt trapped in a nightmare.

“I wasn’t even aware you were acquainted with her,” Topher said, “but if you are, I imagine you understand why I feel the way I do.”

Ruth whipped around, staring at him with round eyes and knit brows. “ Acquainted with her? What kind of fool’s prank is this?”

He blinked at her. “Prank? I assure you it is no prank. I am in earnest, Ruth. And I should think you might understand now why I didn’t wish to tell you of Rebecca. Only look how you are reacting.”

“Rebecca?” She covered her eyes with both of her hands, groaning. Her anger reared its head again, and she let her hands drop to her sides. “Topher, you can never see her again.” She stared at him with as much force as she could muster. “Ever. Do you understand? Go back to Marsbrooke if you cannot muster the discipline for such an arrangement, but you cannot continue seeing her.”

His brow blackened. “I cannot, can I? You would have me abandon the woman I love—and who loves me in return?”

She was momentarily bereft of speech. “And you would risk everything I am working toward for a woman who doesn’t even know your true name?”

He looked away. “I am going to tell her. She will understand. She loves me for who I am—not for my name.”

“Does she? Does she know that you haven’t a penny to your name and have taken to smuggling to help feed your family?”

“She won’t care. She doesn’t care about money, Ruth. She is better than that.”

Ruth scoffed. “So you shall tell her, shall you? And will you tell Oxley as well? Will he be so understanding? For I can assure you that it is you and not I who will tell him.”

Topher shot her an annoyed glance. “Of course I shan’t tell Oxley. It is none of his business.”

“None of—” Ruth stared at her twin, uncomprehending. “He is paying me two hundred pounds to help him win her over! No doubt you wish for me to continue on as usual, defrauding him of his money while my own brother pays his addresses to her?”

Topher’s face went pale, his eyes round, as though he was staring at a ghost. His cravat bobbed. “You mean Miss Devenish is the woman Oxley wishes to marry?”

“Of course she is!”

His head shook slowly from side to side in horror.

Ruth stared at him, trying to understand his reaction—there was no acting or artifice in it. “You…you mean to say you didn’t know?”

“No! No. I was certain that…I…I…you must not have said her name.”

“Surely I have!” But she was not sure. They had spoken little of the specifics of Oxley’s situation. Topher was rarely at home to speak with. And now she knew why.

Topher shook his head again. “I swear I never knew, Ruth, I…” Grief began to dispel the horror in his eyes, and he slumped down upon his bed, eyes unfocused.

Ruth forced herself to take a deep breath. Topher hadn’t intentionally undermined what she was doing with Oxley. It was a mistake.

A terrible mistake.

She sat down beside him and put a hand on his back, speaking softly. “I am sorry, Topher. I am. But you must end things with her.”

His jaw hardened, and his nostrils flared. “I cannot.”

Ruth’s hand dropped, and anger warmed her blood again as she shifted to face him. “You can, and you must. I did not make all of these sacrifices only for you to—”

Topher let out a caustic laugh. “Sacrifices? Sacrifices? You aren’t sacrificing anything! You are in love with Oxley, Ruth! I’m not so blind I couldn’t see that after five minutes at his house with you.”

Heat seared Ruth’s cheeks. “I am not. He is a friend. It is business.”

Topher raised a brow at her. “Well, which is it? You may be deceiving Oxley, and you may be deceiving yourself, but you aren’t deceiving me.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Ruth turned her body and jerked at the cravat around her neck, mortified to find that tears had sprung to her eyes. “The fact is, I cannot have Oxley any more than you can have Miss Devenish. For a dozen reasons.”

“She loves me, Ruth,” Topher said, rising to a stand so that he looked down at her.

Ruth rose to face him. “I don’t care.” Her chest heaved.

“No,” Topher said, disgust and rage on his face. “You don’t care. You cannot have your precious viscount, so you want me to be as miserable as you are.” He whirled around and walked toward the escritoire, kicking at one of the legs.

All at once, Ruth’s energy withered. She slumped over and let her head fall into her hands. Her spectacles dug into the bridge of her nose, and she tore them off, tossing them on the bed and rubbing at the area. “I don’t wish you to be miserable, Topher. You say Miss Devenish loves you, but does she know you? Does she know that you are poor?”

He swallowed and looked away.

“You wear a disguise just as I do, Topher. And, kind and good as her heart may be, she will not marry a poor man, especially one who has deceived her. Her family won’t allow it. I spoke to her mother only today, and while they will let her choose her husband, there are limits to how far that boundary extends. We are well outside of those limits.”

“Her parents like me,” Topher said. But she could hear the doubt in his voice.

“Of course they do. They would be foolish not to—you are charming and kind. But, while their love for their daughter might extend to her choosing a mere gentleman over a viscount, you cannot possibly think that they would look upon the match with equanimity when they discover the true state of things.”

Topher’s nostrils flared, and his chin quivered slightly as he sat down slowly in the desk chair, resting his elbows on his knees. He scrubbed a hand over his face.

Ruth swallowed the lump in her throat and looked away. In her brother’s face, she saw her own pain—the pain of admitting that what he wanted with all his heart simply could not be. She rose from the bed and stepped toward him, kneeling so that she could look up into his face.

“In less than a fortnight, we will return home to Mama.” She took one of his hands in hers. “We may both return with broken hearts, but we will not return empty-handed. And I cannot help hoping that, when we see the relief and joy upon Mama’s face, and when we watch the children delight in a full meal, it will be a bit of salve on our wounds.” She pressed his hand.

They remained in silence for a few minutes, and when Ruth spoke again, she kept her voice soft. “How did this happen, Toph?”

He didn’t respond for a moment, and when he did, his voice sounded heavy. “I met her that first night in Town. I’d made friends with Rowney over a hand of cards and a glass of port at a brewery not far from here, and he insisted I join him at a small party near his lodgings. I agreed—I liked the fellow, and it seemed like my best chance of spending an amusing evening. Rebecca was there—the most angelic creature I have ever laid eyes on.”

His eyes glazed over with memory, and some of the pain on his face dissipated. “When an impromptu dance began, I excused myself, not knowing the figures well enough to join in with confidence. Rebecca was sitting out, of course, for she hasn’t danced in more than a year. Rowney suggested we keep one another company, and so we did. And she was every bit as angelic in person as I had thought her from across the room. More so, even. I knew I would likely never see her again—we would be leaving Town soon. And that knowledge gave me confidence.”

His mouth turned up in a small half-smile. “I made her laugh, asked her question after question. I wanted to know everything about her. And when she asked me about myself, I did as you suggested.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I tried to forget we ever left Dunburn—answered as if she was meeting the Topher Hawthorn of two years ago—the heir of Dunburn instead of the Topher Hawthorn who shares a room with his three younger brothers.” His head moved slowly from side to side. “I could see and feel the connection between us—so much that when Rowney and I returned to his lodgings after the party, I felt like I had lost my future all over again.”

He let out a sigh and dropped his head. “I drank deeply that night and slept until late. Didn’t want to wake up to reality, I suppose. So when you told me Oxley was willing to pay you to stay on, I was elated. I couldn’t help myself—couldn’t keep myself from seeking her out wherever I could. And she wanted me to, Ruth. She welcomed it.”

Ruth nodded.

“But you are right.” He watched his fingers twiddling in his lap. “She doesn’t know me or my name—or that I haven’t two shillings to rub together. She deserves better. She deserves someone like Oxley.”

Ruth blinked quickly and dashed away a tear from her eye. She knew his pain. But at least Miss Devenish loved him in return. Or perhaps that made him more to be pitied—what he wanted was within reach, and that would make giving it up all the more painful. Ruth’s desires were mere foolish fantasies.

Topher looked up at Ruth again. “Does Oxley love her?”

Ruth pressed her lips together. “He respects and admires her. And I think he will come to love her in time.”

Topher looked away, clenching his eyes shut. Silence reigned for some time, both of them lost in the pain of the reality they faced.

“I will tell her,” Topher finally said.

“Tell her what? You cannot tell her the truth.”

He lifted his shoulders. “I will figure something out.”

Ruth sighed. “Even if you do, there is no guarantee she will take Oxley. Not if she is so deeply in love with you .”

His hand balled into a fist within hers, and he met her gaze, his forehead heavy-laden with soberness. “She will if I make it clear that there is no chance of a future for us—if I inspire her with dislike of me. Besides, you can make them love each other. It is what you do.”

Ruth shut her eyes. “I don’t know if I can, Topher. I am not, much as I wish I were, an unbiased observer.” She lowered her gaze. “But I have to try.” Her chin attempted to quiver, and she set her jaw. “They are both good people, and they stand a very good chance at happiness together.”

He stood abruptly, as if her words had singed him. “I will tell her tomorrow.” He stood by the door, as if inviting her to leave.

She rose slowly and walked toward him, stopping for a moment. “I am sorry, Topher. I truly am.”