A Mountain Man Christmas Crush (Mountain Men of Granite Junction #1)

Chapter 5

Chapter Five

T he next several days passed in much the same way, with both of them keeping a wary distance. Once the driveway was plowed, Gene headed back to the workshop, but he cut his days short. He came back to work on repairs he’d noted around the house and barn, especially the goat pen, knowing they’d take off once the weather got better. Sarah caught him once, when she came out to feed and milk the goats, but she only stood there watching for several long minutes, then went back inside, letting him continue his work.

At night was the most awkward, with Sarah and him watching each other carefully. No repeat of the chess game was attempted, not during the week, though he often found Sarah sitting in the living room in front of the fire reading. He wanted to join her, wanted to chase away the loneliness that haunted him, but he was mindful of his own words the morning after the storm. It wouldn’t be fair to her to lead her on. And, to be honest, it was torture for him too, to be close to her, knowing he couldn’t have her.

Bo didn’t have a single problem with it. He spent as much time as possible at her feet, eventually worming his way onto the couch next to her, spread out on the blanket with his head in her lap while she stroked his head and he groaned in pure joy. Gene feared he would have to leave his dog behind when he moved on.

That Friday, he came home from work and Sarah wasn’t around. Not with the goats, nor in the kitchen, which was unusual. In a room off the kitchen area, he found her working, the smell of various scents and lye permeating the air. He knocked to get her attention, and she jerked around.

She was fully covered in gloves, an apron, mask and even goggles and a hair covering. The look of initial panic in her eyes was replaced with relief. “It’s you, Gene. Sorry. I got carried away making soap and lotion and didn’t realize the time.”

He walked into the room but not too close to the table since he wasn’t dressed for lye. “Is this the soap I’ve been using in my room?”

She nodded, and a hint of color showed above the mask. “I’m sorry about the scent when you first got here. I had nothing more neutral. I swapped it out as soon as I could.”

He grunted. “Cam Miller teased me for days about the flowery scent, then asked where he could get some for Molly. I thought he was kidding.”

She grinned, the lines around her eyes showing her amusement. “Molly is one of my best customers. She carries my soaps and lotions in her salon.”

He sniffed the cooling mixture. “What scent is that?”

“It’s something new I’m trying for the holidays. I hope it will be ready. Takes a couple of weeks to cure. Just in time for Christmas.”

“Cutting it close. Where do you sell it?” He remembered she’d mentioned she made soap, but this was a bigger operation than he thought, not a side gig as he’d first expected. This explained all the goats and milk she got from the herd.

She poured the mixture into a silicone mold. “A few places in town right now. Sierra’s spa. Molly’s salon. Tara has even used it at the guest ranch. It’s a little extra money to help.”

He leaned against the table and folded his arms. “You keep mentioning extra money. And turning this place into a bed-and-breakfast. Your dad always talked about how he left money for you after he was gone. What happened to that?”

She put the mold in the old refrigerator next to several other molds already in place, clearly avoiding his gaze. Then she cleaned up, putting bowls and mixers in the industrial sink. “Health care can be so expensive these days, especially home care. I did what I had to do to keep dad home and cared for. I told you this. It was best for dad.”

He did a rapid calculation in his head, not really knowing the cost of healthcare, but knowing her father had been sick for over two years and needing almost round-the-clock care the last year or so added up to a sickening number. “How much is left?”

She turned her back and began washing dishes. “Not enough.”

He studied the young woman who he was realizing was stronger than he’d given credit for, tougher and more mature than her years, possibly. And he wanted to kick himself for being so wrapped up in himself and his own woes that he was blind to the people who helped him, cared for him as a family member when he first came to Granite Junction. Was he that much of a self-centered prick that he took from others and gave nothing back? Harold would have been disappointed in him, retreating from the world and not offering a helping hand to Sarah.

Clearly, though, she didn’t want his pity. But he could find other ways to help, including the small help he’d been offering, including rent and fixing up the place.

He pushed off the table. “Don’t worry about dinner. You look beat. I’ll get us something and bring it here. Unless you’d rather go out. Have a nice evening away from all of this?”

That was the absolute last thing he wanted, but when she turned shining eyes to him, with a hint of hesitation, he was lost. “Do you mean it? I’d love a night out. It’s been so long.”

He stifled a sigh. He couldn’t refuse her anything. “Whenever you’re ready, we’ll go.”

Maybe he wasn’t the best boyfriend material, but he could offer her a fun evening with friends. He headed for his room to make a few calls.

* * *

S arah sat at the table in the middle of The Rock, Granite Junction’s bar and grill, surrounded by several friends, completely overwhelmed by the evening. Over the past few years, she had rarely gone out because of her father’s illness, settling for occasional cups of coffee or lunches with friends in the beginning, then those slowly dwindling as his health declined. Sure, she had a nurse, but her father could be difficult at best and she was most adept at handling him, and he preferred her for most of his moods, even as the nurse handled his physical needs. Being around so many people was almost like a tsunami of sound and emotion crashing over her, threatening to pull her under and drown her. Only Gene’s arm at her lower back settled her, grounded her.

She leaned into him for a moment, grateful that he was willing to give up his loner ways to give her this evening. “Thank you.”

He leaned closer until his beard tickled her cheek. “For what?”

“For putting this together. It’s been a long time since I’ve gone anywhere,” she admitted.

A ghost of a smile creased his lips. “I suspected as much. Your friends were thrilled to hear you wanted to come out tonight. I suspect it won’t be an early evening.”

She frowned, worried that he would be tense and nervous about the night. “We can leave whenever you want. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”

He rubbed her lower back, warmth spreading wherever he touched. “Don’t worry about that, Sarah. They’re my friends too. You have fun.”

And with that statement, she allowed herself to be pulled into the conversation and even into some dancing with the girls. Finally, after a couple of hours and a few drinks later, a slow song came on and she turned to head back to her seat when Gene appeared at her side. She froze, surprised at his presence.

“May I have this dance?”

His words sobered her immediately, reminding her of their previous weekend and their kiss, even as her heart leaped in her chest like some cliched romance heroine. “Gene, I don’t want to cause confusion.”

“It’s just a dance, Sarah.”

Her eyes stared up at him, and she knew her heart was in them. It could never be just a dance, not for her. She feared, if she took his hand, she was headed for a heartbreak, but she wanted that dance so much, wanted to be held by him just once. She was coming to life again, and she wanted this one night, even if it hurt at the end.

Sarah took his hand and let him pull her close. He tucked her against him, her head against his shoulder, one arm wrapped around his neck and the other tangled with his hand. His beard rubbed against her ear and they swayed to the music, slowly, quietly, peacefully. For the first time in forever, she felt safe, protected, loved, encircled in his arms like a cherished partner.

But she knew the truth. This was an illusion. He wanted nothing more than the moment, swept up in the evening. He’d been explicit in stating that, even as he tortured her with this dance. She was drawn in despite knowing the reality and she didn’t care. She’d rather have this one chance with him, one memory, then let him go free, than never take the chance at all.

She’d lived her life by being careful, not doing anything but what had been expected of her. Take care of her father. Be the good daughter. The only rebellion was not marrying her father’s protégé at the law office. Thank God he’d tired of waiting for her, tired of her playing nursemaid, and chased another girl down and married her. So she’d have a second rebellion by having a dance with fire, by taking a chance with Gene, as far as he would let her, then nurse her broken heart and move on, eventually. She was strong. She could do it.

The music slowly wound down, and he sighed against her, reluctantly letting her go. “Should we go home now?”

She nodded, slowly pulling away. But he wouldn’t let her go far, holding her hand as if this were an actual date. They headed for the table to make their goodbyes.

Sierra pulled her in for a quick hug. “When the holidays are over, we should talk about your soaps and lotions. I can’t keep them in the shop. You need to consider doing something more with them, if you have the product.”

Sarah cocked her head. “What do you mean?”

Molly poked her head over. “I agree. Daniel, the guy who helps Gene and Cam sell their stuff online? He could set you up with an online store or even Etsy. You could really do well with your stuff, Sarah. I’ve tried other goat’s milk products, but your soaps and lotions are the best. And Tara said she’d stock it in their gift shop too next season. You need to consider expanding.”

Sarah nodded, unsure of how to respond. She had started it to use up the milk and add a unique touch to her rooms. But without having guests, selling it seemed a needed option. Now, maybe it could be more. But how?

Gene laid a hand on her lower back. “Ready?”

The girls gave her a knowing look. “Talk to you later!”

She blushed and let him lead her out of The Rock.