A Queen of Ice (A Trial of Sorcerers #5)

Chapter 30

30

T he rest of them spent the remaining part of the afternoon settling into the abode. It was easy to get comfortable in the space, since it was actually designed to be a home, and the weather was fortunately mild.

The hardest part was not making any fires—Eira wasn’t sure how closely the Pillars watched houses that were driven out or abandoned…but she didn’t want to risk someone seeing flames where there shouldn’t be any. An illusion had been considered, but they didn’t want to take even the slight risk of someone passing by and sensing the magic—or Eira’s power wavering when she inevitably slept.

As the twilight filtered through the grime and dust that caked the windows, Alyss closed her journal with a soft sigh. This was her third, or fourth one? The one that the actual story was going into, according to her.

“Is it fighting with you today?” Eira asked as she watched the back stairwell where Lorn had emerged from earlier for signs of Olivin…or of any enemies, passing her dagger from hand to hand while she waited. Every time the grip moved from one palm to the other, Eira thoughtfully made sure no magic was sticking to the blade.

“A bit.” Alyss rolled onto her back. She’d been propped on her elbows for hours, writing away while there was enough light for it in a position that Eira was certain couldn’t have been comfortable. “I’ve put my heroine into a tough situation and I’m not sure how she’s going to get out of it.”

“I’m always happy to bounce ideas, if you’d find it helpful,” Yonlin said over the soft clanking of metal. He’d been tinkering and writing in his own notebook. Though a very different subject matter from Alyss. As he spoke, his eyes darted her way, almost sheepishly.

“Thank you.” Alyss gave him a warm smile that was returned, and the expressions lingered long enough that Eira shifted to make sure her face couldn’t be seen by Yonlin.

When he went back to tinkering, Eira whispered, “So…when is this whatever-it-is between you two going to materialize?”

“There’s no whatever-it-is going on.” Alyss rolled back onto her stomach, grabbing her notebook and flipping it open again. She was only pretending to write, but Eira wasn’t sure for whose benefit. Hers? Or Yonlin’s?

“It’s not nothing.” Eira kept her voice as low as possible.

As if realizing what she was trying to do, Cullen struck up a conversation with Yonlin, distracting him. Eira silently thanked him for the assistance. But she didn’t risk looking back.

“I’m sure it is.” The cap of Alyss’s pen was still on, and she drew endless circles of invisible ink in the corner of her page.

“Sounds like you and he haven’t talked.”

Alyss sighed and sunk her chin into her palm. “He’s…nice. Thoughtful. His obsession with machinations—especially of the weapons variety—is a bit strange, I admit.”

“You adore me, and I’m pretty strange.”

“You’re right about that.” Alyss grinned up at her, briefly. “I think if he loved those things because he loved the destruction they wrought, it might be harder for me. But he’s very academic about it. I deeply admire his mind.”

A small twinge of sorrow twisted in Eira’s heart. Obsessed with the destruction they could reap …like she was. Eira couldn’t stop herself from resting her hand on Alyss’s. In her periphery, she could see her friend’s look of confusion. But Eira didn’t move.

For right now…she wanted a breath, two, ten, where she knew her best friend was still at her side and things were almost like they’d always been…if she pretended. She didn’t want to acknowledge that fate and time were pulling them apart, even if it was only slightly. Even if the paths were parallel. She didn’t want to lose the woman she cared about most in the whole world.

“You should tell him how you feel,” Eira said. She tapped Alyss’s notebook. “Your heroine would.”

“I don’t know, my heroine sometimes makes dumb choices.”

“Wonder who you modeled that after,” Eira said dryly. Alyss snorted. “Seriously, though.”

“I know, it’s just that…I don’t know if he’d want someone like me.” Alyss’s voice had gone tiny with the weight of her insecurity.

“‘Someone like you?’ Someone profoundly kind? Thoughtful? Smart? Immeasurably patient? An incredibly talented artist? Not to mention absolutely gorgeous.” Eira had just been getting started when Alyss interrupted.

“Someone who doesn’t want the carnal acts of passion at all.” Fear of how others would feel about Alyss’s desires—or complete lack thereof—had always held her back. Ever since they were back in the Tower and Alyss realized she was “different” from most in lacking those urges.

“You were the person who taught me that there are many ways love can look, Alyss.” Eira gave her hand one more squeeze. Her friend’s eyes rose to meet hers and she tried to give the most encouraging smile she could muster. “You can’t speak for him and what he wants. You must ask.”

“I know.” Alyss ducked her chin.

“You should do it before we get to Risen. Who knows what’s going to happen…and you don’t want to leave anything unsaid.” Eira’s words went soft.

“Sounds like that’s advice you need to take, too.” Alyss lifted her hand and held out her pinky. “Make me a pact, and we both will be brave about our hearts. After that fighting Ulvarth will be nothing.”

“Absolutely.” Eira hooked her finger with Alyss’s and they looked into one another’s eyes with a nod of conviction. She wasn’t entirely sure what she was swearing herself to, but Eira swore it with her whole heart. Perhaps…what she swore was to figure out that promise to herself. She scanned the windows and made sure the side streets were still empty before standing. “You should all get some sleep.”

“What about you?” Cullen asked.

“I’m going to wait up for Olivin—make sure he gets back all right.” She could feel Cullen studying her, deciphering how to read into the declaration. But his silent inquiry didn’t last very long.

“If you need us, please wake us.” He started for his bedroll. Very little seemed to bother Cullen these days, and she was immensely grateful for it.

“What he said.” Alyss rolled onto her back with a yawn.

Eira left them to settle, descending the staircase in the back of the room where Lorn and Olivin had disappeared earlier. It led to a small cellar. The ceiling was so low that she had to duck. Eira placed her hand on the wall and frost extended out from her fingers, coating the room. She felt the void it sank into behind a large plank of wood. Not a very elegant cover to their tracks. But the operation was no doubt less sophisticated than the Court had once been.

Her magic retreated and she sat on the last step to wait.

It had been about an hour when the wood in the back shifted with a soft grunt. Eira sheathed the dagger she’d been passing from hand to hand as she had been plotting their next steps. She’d slipped it back into its holster on her thigh as Olivin emerged.

“Perfect, you’re here,” he said as soon as his eyes landed on her.

“How did it go?”

“Very well. Lorn has done wonders setting up a real network here. I think tomorrow will go well…” He wasted no time filling Eira in on the state of Risen, which led to comparisons with Hokoh. Then, the plan of attack for tomorrow, how Lorn would rally his allies and they would hit the Pillars where it hurt—the temple.

“He’s sending us into the most dangerous place in the city.” Eira stroked her chin.

“We’re in much better shape than the rest of them. It makes sense.”

“Or Lorn isn’t as loyal as we hope and he’s leading us into a trap.”

Olivin seemed aghast she’d suggest it. “Lorn is loyal and true. He’d never work with the Pillars.”

“He’s been under the influence of Pillars for a long time.” She paused, narrowing her eyes. “Much like my uncle was.”

“Eira.” His tone softened. “I told you I was sorry for how I acted. I was—and am. You’re not going to let bitterness over it impact your judgment here and now, are you?”

“I’m not bitter.” She sighed. Maybe she was, a little . But she quickly let it go on having it pointed out. “It is a valid concern is all.”

“As was mine when I brought it up.”

“You’re right.” Eira relented so they could move on.

Olivin sighed, deflating some. “I know Lorn better than most. He was there when Yonlin and I were figuring out what our lives were going to look like. He helped me join the Court of Shadows. He’s worked at every turn to thwart the Pillars. He hates them for what they’ve done to his city and his people.”

“I believe you.” She tried to make it clear she wasn’t picking a fight with her tone. “But I’m still unsure if we should spearhead this attack. Hokoh doesn’t matter, not when it comes to killing Ulvarth. I do not want any of us getting injured before Risen.”

“I completely agree. And I know you want to— need to be the one to kill Ulvarth. Which is why I’ve ensured there will be no harm that comes to you,” he reassured her, missing the point. “You’ll hang back and keep a perimeter around the temple with your ice to prevent more Pillars from joining as we destroy them from within.”

“What?”

“You overseeing things will help keep the rest of us safe with your power—and you safe most of all.” Olivin’s hands fell on her shoulders, caressing her gently. “We are nothing without our leader. I wouldn’t want to see anything happen to you.”

“You didn’t think to consult me before deciding what I would or wouldn’t do?” The words weren’t harsh, or cold, but matter-of-fact.

Still, they seemed to surprise him. “You had agreed we would help them.”

“I hadn’t agreed to what help looked like yet.” The first lesson Adela had taught her—be careful negotiating and only ever say exactly what you mean. And the idea of her staying back from the front lines was utterly unappealing.

“You’re a smart woman. I trusted you to see logic.”

“Do not compliment me in the same breath that you are using to set aside my worries,” Eira cautioned him.

“I didn’t mean to, just that…I truly thought it for the best. We could help Lorn, free Hokoh, and have a base of resistance—maybe even distract Ulvarth in the process. And you would stay safe and ready to attack him when the time came.”

She sighed and shook her head, at a loss of what to say. There were so many things that she wanted to. Yet, she didn’t know where to start. It wasn’t that what he was saying was wrong … But none of it felt right. Like they were singing the same song but at two different parts.

“You’ve said it yourself, we’re going to need all the help we can get when it comes to defeating Ulvarth.”

“I know.” Eira shifted, looking up at him. Not harsh, not cold, but also showing no hesitation when she said, “In the future, I want to be consulted on these plans before they’re decided, all right?”

He nodded. “Of course.”

Even though that’s what he said, Eira was left wondering just how the man who had once seemed to understand her more than anyone, now seemed to be making such lapses in judgment. Part of her wanted to ask, but she was afraid of what the answer might be.