A Surrender Of Hope (Umbra Hunters #3)

14. Lennox

FOURTEEN

Lennox

M y magic swirls in delight around me as my eyes slam closed. Jesthren just royally screwed me over with his simple words, and anger rushes to the surface, despite knowing he wasn't actually trying to get me in trouble. I can hear Meyer freeze in place before she turns, and I sigh, bringing my hand up to drag over my face and down my beard before I open my eyes and face my tiny, furious mate.

“I… I don't believe I heard you correctly. What did you just say?” she says, her soft voice pitched into a low, calm tone. I know it means the exact opposite as what it sounds like. Valen instantly steps back from me, and I grind my teeth at the pussy. He won’t say or do a single thing to make Meyer unnecessarily angry, where I seem to only aggravate her whenever I open my mouth.

“You’re his…” Jesthren trails off as he looks up and notices Creed and Valen shaking their head. “Oh… well, shit! You have to tell me when things are supposed to be kept a secret! This isn't my fault! You can't be mad at me for this, Lennox! If you expect it not to get back to her, which is shady as fuck, by the way, then you have to tell me these things!”

Meyer spins to glare at me, and I hold my hands out in front of her before dropping them to cover my balls when I see her expression. Yeah, I don't think I’m walking away from this without her taking a swing at them. And honestly, I can’t even be mad at the fact. I totally deserve it right now.

“Creed,” I growl, and he nods, moving to give Meyer a peck on the cheek before grabbing Jesthren and rushing after Razar. “Valen, in our rush, I don't think we closed the Veil. Could you—” I don't finish the sentence before Valen nods and practically runs up the hill toward the rift. Slowly I turn my attention toward my tiny, seething mate and inwardly groan, wishing I knew how to stop pissing her off so much. I had planned to tell her everything on our trip to Versipellis, and go into more detail about what happened between her and Inanis when I was trying to bring her back to life. But of course, Jesthren had to open his mouth only minutes before the scheduled conversation.

“You’ve been keeping secrets?” she asks, her dark eyes twinkling with sparks of powerful red magic. The feeling of it rushes over my skin, and my knees almost give way to the feeling of my mate's magic brushing against mine. I bite my lip to stifle the groan that threatens to break loose. I don't need to piss her off any more than I already have, but there is absolutely no way to stop the hard as fuck erection in my pants.

My little mate is strong… so much stronger than I thought she would be here. I knew bringing her to this realm would open her up more to the natural magic inside her, but I hadn't expected this amount. From what I can feel, she already rivals Creed’s, and something tells me there is more lurking under the surface.

“No! Not a secret! I said you were mine, that we were bound together,” I rush out, stepping back when she storms toward me. I try not to get distracted by how stunning this angry creature is as she plots my death. I love the anger and power that radiates from her petite body. The way her eyes promise death as her pretty full lips entrance you, making you think everything is fine until she strikes out with words that slice you to the fucking core.

I had been attracted to Meyer the moment I saw her in that damn cabin back in Idaho. Then I grew obsessed when she walked into the Council room full of corrupt Seniors and met my eye without a flicker of fear, something most Hunters and Demons alike have trouble doing. Once I got a taste of her, I knew my future was set despite how much I fought it, and now that I’m here, I can't help but think how fucking lucky I am that she’s bound to me.

“Queen? A freaking Queen, Lennox? That wasn't in the memo you gave me,” she hisses through her teeth, her hands balling into fists as she approaches. “I can’t even keep Razar from kidnapping Milo, and you want me to be a Queen?”

“To be fair, I told you we should hold on a moment when we were talking so I could explain things to you, and you didn't like the idea.” Meyer yanks herself to a stop, her cheeks flaming bright red as I remind her of that fact. Does it make me not telling her the whole truth any better? No. Not really, but I can say I at least tried, and then when my control was slipping, I ensured it was truly her who wanted me and not the newly formed mate bond. That had to give me some points… right?

I grimace at my thoughts, knowing I’m a complete asshole for not having a long and detailed talk with her prior to this moment, but I don't regret binding her to me; Meyer is mine. My mate, mine to love, to protect, and mine to piss off every fucking day. She’s going to have to get used to it. I’m not giving her up even if there was a way to undo what I did, which there’s not. But, maybe I should try to figure out how to talk to her more. Communication has never been my strong suit, and I hate that it's now negatively affecting my mate.

“I said there would be no going back for us, Little Demon. What did you think that meant?”

“You have a way of saying and doing things one moment, then acting differently the next, Lennox,” she rasps, looking conflicted. I can see and feel her panic, which draws a growl to my lips, hating that she’s standing in front of me upset. She knows what I’m implying, but I think I might have brought this whole denial issue on us with my hot and cold behavior before mating her. “I was too scared to think about it. I didn't want to get hurt again. I just figured you meant I was like a girlfriend or something,” she mutters, her hands flexing at her sides as she tries to calm herself down.

My magic inches out and I can feel her panic and fear radiating off her in waves, making me step forward, the need to soothe the feeling away an instinct I have trouble ignoring. When she shoots me a look that withers my soul a little, I pause and sigh, tilting my head to the side and keeping my voice low and calm, knowing I need to stay level-headed since I’m the reason for her panic.

“You can look at it that way,” I offer with a shrug, trying to calm her a little. Her brows pull together in question, and I offer her a smile. “But more like a… permanent girlfriend.”

“A mate… what does that mean to you? What’s the equivalent in the human world?” she asks, swallowing hard, her eyes flicking over my face with a strained expression. She already knows what it means. My Little Demon isn't stupid, but it looks like she needs verbal confirmation, and I’m not sure I want to give it to her when I feel a slight sense of betrayal emanating from her.

Dammit. How did I fuck this up so much?

“You already know what it means, Meyer,” I murmur. I watch her closely as she rolls her lips together and nods, her shaking hands moving to weave through her longer-than-normal hair as she spins in a circle, looking around us with wide eyes.

“Yeah… I do.” Her voice is small as she nods.

“Do you hate the idea so much?” I ask, biting the inside of my cheek as I wait for her response. If she does, if the idea is completely intolerable, then I will do everything in my power to figure a way to free her, despite how much the idea sends physical pain through me. She shakes her head and I puff out a choked sigh of relief.

“No. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t scare me. We’re always at each other’s throats,” she grumbles, eyes refusing to meet my mine, and I grind my teeth together when the action hurts more than I would like. She’s my mate and should never look away from me, but I also know she’s trying to get used to this new world she's been thrown into, and I need to attempt to control my instincts no matter how hard they press against me. But when a single tear tracks down her smooth cheek, my control snaps, and I take a step toward her, hand moving to her chin. “No,” she rasps, stepping back and shaking her head. “You tied me to you. You mentioned our lives are twined together?”

I nod, hand frozen between us as I watch her every move. “That's right,” I confirm.

“Spell that out for me. You already felt my emotions, right? What else does this mean besides being… yours?” I try not to groan at her admission of being mine as I take a deep breath.

“Everything Jesthren said is true. You will be Queen when I ascend to the throne, but that’s still decades if not centuries away, Meyer. My father is still in his prime, and I won't claim the throne until he can no longer defend the kingdom. This isn’t a pressing matter for you to worry about right now. I will handle everything in order to ensure you have time to mentally and physically handle this new adjustment to your life. I would have asked beforehand, but you were already…” I trail off, not wanting to remind myself how close we all were to losing this woman.

“Dead,” she finishes for me. “Would I have lived without you mating me?” she suddenly asks, no longer sounding upset, more curious.

“No.” She nods and sighs. “I’m sorry, Meyer. This is my fault. I should’ve told you all of this before we were together physically, and I didn’t. There is no excuse for it.”

“Why didn’t you say something before Jesthren?” she asks and I cringe.

“I knew the rift was going to take a toll. I planned to tell you before we got to the castle, but not before so you wouldn’t have extra stress.”

“Are you mad at me?” I frown and shake my head. Yeah, her constant need to push me to my limits and not submit makes my Demon side feral with need, but I’m not mad at her.

“No?” I answer hesitantly, wondering how the hell she could think that. I thought I was the one in trouble here. I wish, more than anything, I could’ve asked her permission before mating her. It would’ve been the fair and right thing to do, however she was already dead and I couldn’t. It was let her die, or take her as my mate.

“You mated me.”

“Yes?” I tilt my head, still not understanding. She sighs like I’m the daft one here as she shifts nervously on her feet.

“You didn't have the option. I would have died. Are you mad that you tied yourself to me? I didn’t have a say, but it doesn’t seem like you did either.” Realization dawns, and I try and fail not to smile, making her scowl deepen. Holy shit, she’s actually concerend for my feelings? Me … when I’ve been the biggest asshole to her this entire time. Fuck, I really don’t deserve this beautiful girl. “Don't laugh at me!” she snaps, and I have to bite my lip so I don't actually laugh.

“I didn't laugh. And no. I'm not mad, Meyer.” I step forward and grab her hand, making her glare up at me as I tug her close, loving how her small body fits against mine. Tucking my finger under her chin, I smirk at her. “What am I?” I ask, already knowing what her answer will be.

“An asshole,” she growls, eyes flashing with anger and heat as my gaze moves to her soft lips, wondering if I could convince her to kiss me again without jeopardizing a kick to my balls. Why is this girl so damn addictive? It's entirely frustrating. I don't think I’ve had a single clear thought since binding her sweet ass to me on the battlefield. Yet my barely there control scares me enough to try and keep my distance as much as I can tolerate. I’m a Demon and there’s a primal need and urge to be with her in a way that I can’t stifle. I want to pick my mate up and steal her away to have her all to myself. But if I accidentally hurt her… My stomach rolls at the thought and I have to swallow down bile as I answer her.

“Correct. So, do you truly think I would mate a girl and tie her soul to mine for eternity if I didn't want her?” I ask, showing way more of my hand than I’m comfortable revealing but it’s necessary if Meyer and I are going to turn our turbulent relationship into more than a single hot fuck.

I’m not going to lie; I love the push and pull between us. Her anger only fuels my need to have her by my side during the day and under me at night. There’s a tension that forms between us and tortures me on a daily basis. But I also know I need to offer her more, to give her something of me I haven't given others for this to work. The lies that started our relationship still hang over us like a heavy weight, and I know I need to make up for them. Meyer knows I will keep her physically safe; I’ve felt as much when she's near me. But I know she wouldn't trust me with more than that. I can feel her guard go up when I come into a room or move to her side, which won't do. I may not have planned for this girl to crash into my life, but now that she’s here, I refuse to let her go.

Meyer’s brows draw together, her lips parting slightly as she stares at me. I think I might have shocked her into silence for the first time ever, and I instantly feel uncomfortable, wishing I just stayed quiet and let her believe what she wanted. Pursing my lips together, I look over her, my magic warning me of several Demons approaching. I see Creed poke his head from around a tree a few hundred feet away, and he nods, letting me know he has them in his sights. The convoy Father sent to meet us is close.

“Let’s go,” I grumble, not wanting to make this any more awkward than I already have. I move to step around her, but her small hand darts out, grabbing mine and surprising me enough to jerk to a stop.

“Wait.” Meyer frowns up at me, her head shaking the slightest amount like she’s trying to clear it. “Do you actually mean that?” My eyes narrow on her, my defenses back up as I look at her. “Don't lie,” she threatens, and I roll my eyes, hating how she likes to parrot my words back to me. It's not like she would know if I was lying or not… I think.

My frown deepens as I tug on our mate bond, my cock throbbing in response to Meyer’s sweet citrus scent in such a close proximity. The males of our race feel the mate bond more than females. Meyer will want to be closer to me and have an instinctual need to protect those she's mated to, but for the males, the bond is a primal drive, heightening our awareness of our mates and our protective instincts.

Meyer was already the most protected female in the realm the moment she had Valen and Creed wrapped around her little finger. Now, she won't be able to breathe or move without me knowing. Something I’m incredibly grateful for since she likes to dance with death far too much for comfort.

“Elaborate,” I demand, refusing to make myself look like more of a fool.

“How the hell do I elaborate that Lennox? Are you lying to me, or is what you said the truth? I don't want your pretty words if they’re only to calm me down!” she fumes in front of me, hands placed on her curvy hips and nose wrinkling in frustration. Fuck she’s so damn cute when she's mad. “Are… are you smiling? I swear to God I’ll kick you in the?—”

I cut off her angry tangent, scooping her up and kissing the hell out of her, trying not to chuckle against her lips as I hold her close. “I wasn't lying,” I rasp against her lips. I damn near whimper when her hot little tongue darts out, swiping against mine and making my body fucking ignite. My hands move to her ass, holding her in place as I continue to kiss her the way I want, wishing we were somewhere private rather than out in the open.

“Unless you want to give Andras and his Unit a show, I would maybe put her down,” Valen says at my side, his voice like a bucket of cold water as I tear my lips from my Little Demon’s. I glower at my brother, my head falling to Meyer's shoulder as she gasps for breath. Her fingers, which had made their way into my hair, tighten for a moment until the sounds of hooves striking the ground nearby make her wiggle in my arms, wanting to be set down.

I relent, placing her back on her feet before standing to my full height at her side as I sigh in frustration. I did it agin. Fuck.

“Meyer?”

“Hmm?”

“There’s a reason Demons don’t mate this young. I’m a pushy bastard and overstep when I shouldn’t. It’s a flaw, one that I will immediately work on,” I promise as she looks up at me. “I’m sorry. I should’ve asked before kissing you again.”

“Yeah. But I’ll probably overstep at times as well. Let's try to figure it out together, alright?” she offers, and I nod, beyond grateful that she’s quick to temper, but also quick to forgive. Creed and Jesthren step out from the trees and wave down Andras and the eight Demons traveling with him as they ride into view. A soft gasp at my side has me looking down, watching as Meyer gets her first look at a Demonic creature besides the Therion and Beastia.

“What are those?” she asks, eyes wide as she shuffles closer to my side, hand darting out to grab Valen’s and tugging him close.

“Nuckelavee,” Valen answers as I lean down, grabbing her other hand.

“Demonic horses,” I elaborate, my grin widening as I look up and spot the large black beast tethered to Andras’ saddle. A few of the men call out to Creed and Jesthren, stopping to offer smiles and slaps on the back in greeting. Some of Andras’ men dismount their horses and bring Creed and Jesthren their own mounts.

“Those are not horses,” Meyer disagrees. I smile at Andras, who grins and nods his head in greeting as he and four others pull their horses to a stop, and he dismounts.

“Valen!” he shouts, happiness radiating off him in waves as he stomps over and grabs my brother in a half-hug, half-choke-hold, shaking him a little as Valen laughs and returns his embrace. “It's been too long, my friend!”

“It’s good to be home,” Valen admits, patting Andras’ shoulder while keeping hold of Meyer's hand.

“Your mother is in a tizzy. King Orcus wouldn't allow her to ride out and meet you,” he explains. I wince, knowing Father will regret that, but understanding why he did as I look at Meyer, who is watching Andras and Valen with keen eyes.

The Nuckelavee in front of Meyer snorts, smoke billowing from its grey flared nostrils, and she startles back, her hand tightening on mine. “She won't hurt you,” Andras says, letting Valen go and turning to stand in front of us. His eyes rake over my Little Demon, surprise and wonder etching his expression as he looks from her to Valen, then back again. He is undoubtedly in awe that another Dream Walker is in front of him. “Prince Drakas,” he dips his head in a respectful nod to me when he finally regains his composure, and I raise a brow.

“Really?” I scoff, making Andras peek up at me with a telling smile and wink before he looks at Meyer and smiles way too charmingly at her. A growl breaks from my chest before I can control it, and I grind my teeth in annoyance at my lack of self-control. Andras is the furthest thing from a threat to Meyer. He’s been happily mated and a part of a complete Legion for decades. Andras jumps back from me, hands up and shock plain to see on his face.

“It's like that, is it?” he asks, and I grimace but nod. He let out a low whistle under his breath as he stares at me. “Boy, your father is going to roast your ass.”

“Don't I know it,” I growl, looking up at the four other men behind Andras. He waves them back, eyeing me like I might kill them all, and to be fair, the thought did cross my mind for a moment. By the Gods, I need to get a hold of myself.

“I’m assuming she is the reason Yannos said we are to speak in English?” I nod, my hand curling possessivly around my Little Demon’s.

“I’ll be riding up front,” I instruct, tugging Meyer to me when Valen gently pushes her my way. “You take center front and have Creed to my right. Jesthren can trail with Andras.”

“Uh, that's not Royal protocol,” Andras mutters, looking uneasy at my command. His job is to safely transport us back to Versipellis and deliver us to our parents, but I can't have them too close right now, so we’re going to alter things a bit.

“We’ve been away for over a year without your protection, Andras. We can manage a day's ride home with you as backup.”

“Your Father?—”

“Will understand. I’ll take full blame. He’s already going to be mad at me. You’ll be the least of his problems,” I reassure him, striding over to Hectate, leading a hesitant Meyer along with me. Dipping my head, I brush a hand against her soft fur, carefully avoiding the spines that protrude from her brows as I run my fingers over her wiry black and red mane.

“Nox,” Meyer whispers as Hectate shifts on her paws, bringing her large horse-like body closer to us. Clicking my tongue, I pat her strong neck in greeting, chuckling when she snorts, bright orange eyes flaring as smoke billows in the air around us.

“I missed you too,” I whisper before turning to Meyer and heaving her into my arms.

“No! Nope. I’ll walk,” she practically shrieks, making Creed laugh as he rides up next to us on his horse.

“That will take ages, and we don't have the time,” I tell her, tossing her onto the soft leather saddle and shoving her to the front as I press my foot to the stirrup and mount behind her. Hectate tosses her head, stepping back on her hind legs as I shift my weight onto the saddle.

“Oh, Jesus! I hate you so much right now,” Meyer rasps, her hands gripping my thighs that cradle hers.

“You really need to get better at riding horses, Lemon Drop. You have to do that on Earth, too. Ranger Drakos is about fed up with you not figuring it out by now,” Creed teases.

“Theo can stuff it! And this… thing is not a horse!”

“Mount up!” Andras shouts at the other men who are still talking with Jesthren.

“Wait, where’s Razar?” Meyer gasps, looking around us, worried eyes scanning the trees.

“He’s shifted and will be guarding the convoy,” I tell her as I turn Hectate toward home, more excited than I thought I would be to see it again. Sure, it felt like a cage these last few years that Father had been training me, but I must admit that I missed this realm. The familiar smells and sounds. The boost in magic and lack of lies and concealment on a daily basis.

“Is he okay?” Meyer asks, and Creed nods as Valen rides up next to us.

“I’m keeping track of him, Mi Sol. Try to relax and maybe get some rest on the ride,” he suggests.

“Yeah, like that's going to happen while riding a monster,” she scoffs, melting into me and I grin, leaning down and nipping at her ear.

“You’ve ridden much more terrifying monsters than this one, Little Demon,” I rasp, then grunt when her elbow flies back and hits me in the ribs.

“Knock it off, someone might hear you.” Meyer tips her head back to glare at me, and I can't help but wrap my hand gently around the thin column of her throat, tipping her chin up.

“Good. I want them to hear who I belong to,” I growl as she gapes up at me in surprise. “May I?”

“Yes,” she breaths out before I can finish the question and I slam my lips down on her’s in a possessive and demanding kiss. “You're impossible. You know that right?” she growls against my lips, and I nod, agreeing as my head pounds. “I love the sentiment, but I think asking me for a kiss everytime you want one will get annoying,” she admits and I smile, pressing a kiss to her hair.

“Alright, so how should I handle this?”

“I’ll just kick you in the balls if I don’t want one,” she teases and I laugh, both worried and amused at her words.

“It’s a deal,” I whisper to her, eyes closing for a moment as I enjoy the feel of her in my arms. It's been a long few days, and I can't wait to have a moment to relax. I tuck Meyer close to my chest, her tight little ass pressed against my groin, and I curse myself for ending up in this position. Now I’ll have to ride all day with a hard cock rubbing against her.

I let my arms band around her as I take Hectate’s reins, grinning when she paws at the ground, ready to run. I feel Meyer shiver slightly, the tiny blonde hairs on her arms standing on end and I smirk, glad I’m not the only one affected by a simple touch. Her reaction only reaffirms my need for her and the relationship starting to grow between us. The timing might be wrong for our mating, but I won't let it fail just because I’m an asshole.