A Truth Revealed (The Heart of Cheyenne #3)

Chapter 13

13

There had been some great celebrations in Cheyenne for Lincoln’s birthday, but the real celebratory plans were slated for the birthday of George Washington. At the Evans house, a grand party of outrageous proportions was being planned. It had already been decided that most of the larger pieces of furniture would be stored in tents behind the house to leave plenty of space for musicians and food tables inside.

Will had heard from Mrs. Duffy about Granite Evans’s plans for some of the town’s wealthier bachelors to meet his daughter. Having been able to join them at the dinner table for the evening meals, Will was surprised to hear Mr. Evans talk openly about the reason behind the party. Evans spoke as if Laura were a commodity to be auctioned and was confident that she would be able to pick a husband by the end of the evening. Will was appalled and even commented that he thought the idea ridiculous. He had suggested that a deep abiding love needed time to develop, but Granite Evans just waved him off.

“I’m not talking about deep abiding love. That will come in time,” he had said. “No, what I’m talking about is the most advantageous union that might bring benefit to both families. Laura can tell immediately if she will get along with someone. She’s a brilliant woman of deep feeling. I’m confident of this.”

Will could still hear Laura’s tactful reply, explaining she had plans to not hurry into marriage. She had been quite surprised at her father’s confidence that she’d know by the end of the night who she’d want to marry. Will had been glad to see her take a stand, but her father was insistent and even verged on being angry at times. He reminded her that a lot of planning had gone into this party—and into his career—and he hoped he could count on her to be helpful rather than harmful.

“You look a million miles away,” Laura said, joining Will in the foyer. “Are you all right?”

“I am.” Will balanced on his crutches. “I’ll be so glad when the doctor removes this cast. He said it should just be another couple of weeks.”

“I know. I’m excited for you to be able to walk around unimpeded, but I’ll be sorry to lose my houseguest. Are you ready for our walk?”

He pulled his felt hat low as she opened the front door. “I am. But as for your sorrow over losing your patient, I’m sure you have better things to do than take care of me.”

“Like pick out a husband?”

Will maneuvered the crutches as he stepped from the house. “No. Not that.”

Laura pulled on her gloves. “Shall we walk around the block? The snow is nearly all gone. I don’t think you’ll have any problems.” She closed the door and turned to face Will.

He thought she looked quite lovely in her plum-colored full-length coat, white scarf, and plum-and-white wool bonnet. She was pretty as a picture.

“Are you all right, Will? You look ... well, I can’t really say, but your silence concerns me.”

“I’m fine. I was just thinking that I’ve not seen this coat and bonnet before.”

“No, it’s new. Father insisted I have it. It just arrived with the store inventory. It is quite warm, and giving it to me seemed to please him so much.” She gave a shrug. “I didn’t really need it, but I couldn’t deny him. He insisted on a new gown for the party as well.”

“The coat and bonnet suit you, even with auburn hair.”

“I never really worry about such things. I once had a house mother at one of the boarding schools who refused to allow me to wear any shade of red or pink. She said redheads had no business in such colors. It was most annoying and never sat well with me at all. When I moved to another school, the first thing I did was buy a red hair sash.”

Will couldn’t help smiling. Her cheerful demeanor was like good medicine. “I’m glad you don’t worry about such things.”

She chuckled. “Oh, by the way, did you ever get a letter off to your aunt?”

“I did. It was probably the hardest letter I ever had to write.”

“I’m sure it was.”

They began to walk toward the street in silence. Will concentrated on the path to make sure he didn’t hit any hidden patches of ice, but all the while, he wanted to watch Laura.

“The party plans are coming together in good order,” Laura continued. “Mrs. Murphy has all sorts of delicacies planned. She makes the most delicious pastries.”

“You forget I’ve been eating her food for a month now. I’m quite aware that she’s gifted,” Will admitted.

“Well, I hope you’ll enjoy yourself at the party. I know it hasn’t been that long since ...” She let the words trail off.

“I have to say that your positive outlook and kindness have helped me a great deal. Then there’s the encouraging visits from the pastor and my friends. Those have also helped. I’m sorry I’ve been so depleted of hope. I’m still wrestling with all that’s happened. Just when I think I have some sort of understanding, something comes to discourage me and causes confusion over the entire matter.

“The other day I was speaking to your father about salvation and the priceless gift God gave us in His Son. The words came easily, and I felt confident, but later that night, I awoke from a nightmare and was saturated in doubt and despair. I’ve never had a crisis of faith like this before, and I honestly don’t know what to do.”

“Have you talked to the pastor or even to one of your Christian friends?” she asked, her voice soft and not in the least condemning.

“I’m talking to you.”

Laura smiled. “I meant have you talked to one of the men you call a close friend?”

“Some, but not as I suppose I should. Look, I know the answers. I can quote the Bible from front to back. I can tell you about times of doubt in the lives of many biblical patriarchs. I can tell you the words Jesus had for those in despair. I know what I ought to know, but I can’t seem to ... take it into the deepest part of me ... past the hurt and anger. I need to talk it through with someone.”

They turned the corner and came back in view of the house. Laura pointed. “There are Edward and Charlie. Ask and it shall be given.”

“What do you mean?” Will looked at her oddly and then back down the street to where his two best friends were waiting.

“God knew what you needed and has sent your friends to help.”

“You were helping me just fine.”

She smiled again. “I’m hardly qualified for this one, Will. I can pray and will do so, but I have no insight for this situation. You see, when God allowed everything to be taken from me, I clung to Him all the more. The thought of putting Him from me—of blaming Him or of turning away—never entered my mind. My faith was all that got me through. Knowing that God was there and would never leave me was everything I longed for because everyone else had gone. You aren’t in a place where you want to receive that kind of reassurance.” She stopped as they reached the house and turned toward him.

“But from the stories I’ve heard them tell, I’m almost certain that either Edward or Charlie knows exactly how you feel. Talk to them. And when you get it figured out, I’d love to hear all about it. I am confident that you won’t walk away from God. I think you know that as well.”

Will couldn’t help but nod. Laura reached out and touched his arm with her gloved hand. “You are an amazing man. You’ve served God all your life and never doubted Him, never considered your life without Him at the helm. You aren’t truly doing that now either, but I know you’re hurting and need some help. I also know that this is a test of your faith. Sometimes God allows those moments so that our faith might grow. How else will we make it stronger for the more difficult times in life?”

She squeezed his arm through the heavy coat he wore, but to Will it felt like a branding iron. It was as if she knew exactly what his heart had been telling him for days, while his mind acted in protest like a small child. Even so, there was no condemnation.

Laura moved away without another word. Will heard her speak in a soft, welcoming manner to Edward and Charlie, and he moved forward to join them.

“I’ll have Mrs. Murphy put on some coffee and bring out refreshments. If you need anything at all, just have Will ring for it.” She went into the house while Will worked his way forward on the crutches.

“Laura seemed to think you were hoping we’d stop by,” Edward said.

“I guess I was.” Will shook his head. “Sometimes I think she knows me better than I know myself.”

“Uh-oh,” Charlie said, laughing. “Sounds like maybe you two have been together too much.”

“I’m not sure that’s possible,” Will replied, staring at the closed front door.

After an hour of talking to Edward and Charlie, Will knew that God had sent them to help him through the mire.

Will spoke of his mother and sister as he considered all that they’d discussed. “I know I will mourn their death for a long time to come, just as I am still mourning my father’s passing.”

“Of course you will,” Edward said, setting aside Will’s Bible. “I still mourn the loss of my loved ones. I still wonder what it might have been like had my boy lived. There are all sorts of things that come to mind from time to time.”

“We all still carry the scars of battle. Those friends who stood side by side with us will remain in our memories, both the good and the bad,” Charlie offered. “Death is a constant companion in life, but we must keep our eyes on Jesus. He’s overcome death, and we can overcome it as well—through Him.”

Will rubbed his left knee. “I know you’re right.”

“But don’t think either of us is saying you don’t have a right to grieve,” Edward added. “I needed a long time to move beyond losing Janey and the boy. You may need a long time to deal with your family’s passing. We’re here to help, and I know Marybeth and Melody feel the same way. Laura obviously cares a great deal too. You have people who want to walk this path with you. You don’t have to walk it alone. God hasn’t abandoned you, and neither have we.”

Tears formed in Will’s eyes. It was as if all the pain surfaced at once. A sob broke from deep within, and he buried his face in his hands. He hadn’t yet allowed the tears of grief. Not even for his father. Back then, he had tried to be strong for his mother and sister and hadn’t allowed himself to face the sadness of loss.

As he wept, he heard Edward begin to pray. The whispers were barely audible, but Will knew that was what he was doing. When he stopped, Charlie picked it up and continued. They went back and forth like that for some time, and all the while Will wept.

Laura heard her father’s raised voice at the back of the house and went to investigate. He was shaking his fist at Curtis. When he saw her, his expression softened, and he looked embarrassed. He dismissed Curtis and tried to ad dress her as if nothing had been amiss, but Laura wasn’t about to allow it to pass unnoticed.

“What in the world happened to make you so angry at Curtis?”

“It’s none of your concern.”

“I think it is. I live here too, and I feel that I am constantly coming upon you in one rage or another. Not only that but ...” She stopped, wondering if she dared go on.

I can’t leave things unsaid. They must be resolved , or it will harden my heart against him.

“I overheard you tell your man to drown my kitten.” She stared at him, waiting to see if he would deny it.

“That was a terrible thing, and I am sorry,” her father admitted. “But you must understand ... since you returned ...” He sighed, walked into the kitchen, and took a chair at the empty table where the cook took her meals.

Watching him bury his face in his hands, Laura was surprised by his reaction. For several long moments he said nothing, prompting Laura to take the chair opposite him.

“You have to understand.” He looked up to meet her gaze. “I’ve been so afraid that something might happen to you. Afraid that you wouldn’t make it here, and then when you arrived, well, I was afraid something might hurt you or that you wouldn’t like me. When you announced that you’d brought a wild animal into the house, I’m afraid I didn’t handle it well. I feared diseases and the harm that might come. I didn’t want to see you hurt. I still don’t.”

“But a kitten wasn’t going to harm me.”

Her father shook his head. “It could have. We’ve had cases of rabies around here. People have died. I couldn’t bear the thought that you could be infected.”

Laura hadn’t considered that, and seeing her father’s obvious distress, her anger faded. “It’s just that you’ve been so different from what I expected. You’ve yelled and threatened many people while I’ve been here, and ... well, that’s not the father I remember from when I was little.”

“We’ve both changed, Laura. You must allow for that, but I suppose my anger has been a bit out of control. I just wanted things to be perfect for you. I wanted you to be safe and happy. I feel like such a failure as a father.”

Laura could see there were tears in his eyes. “I’m so sorry you feel that way. I don’t think that at all. You’ve been a wonderful father.”

“I deserted you. I left you alone when you needed me most. I failed to do what I promised your mother I would do.”

Laura reached out and took hold of his hand. “You did what you thought was best for us both. You are a good father and a kindhearted man. You didn’t fail me at all. I’ve grown stronger because of all you did. I might have fallen apart or become a weak and desperate woman. Instead, I learned to put my faith in God and hold fast to my beliefs. I remained convinced that we would one day be rejoined, and that our love for each other would see us through the sorrow of losing Mother. And it has.”

“You’re an impressive young woman full of kindness and love. Your ability to forgive is humbling. I pray you forgive me for whatever flaws I have. I want to do right by you, and I’m sorry that I grieved you with the kitten. We didn’t kill it.”

Laura nodded. “I know. I gave him to the Vogel family. I couldn’t allow him to be killed.”

“I’m so sorry. Please understand, what I did was out of my fear of harm coming to you.”

“I do understand, Father, and I don’t hold it against you. I just wish that next time you will talk to me and explain why you feel as you do. I want to understand and grow closer to you, but I can’t do that if I feel I cannot trust you.”

He squeezed her hand. “You can trust me, Laura. Everything I do—everything I’ve done—has been for you.”

“Do you need anything before we leave?” Edward asked Will.

“No, not a thing. I’m exhausted and plan to go straight to bed. But thank you both for helping me. I know God sent you to break through my iron heart. I have a long way to go, but at least I don’t feel that terrible separation from God any longer.”

“I’m glad to hear it. By the way, Charlie and I came today for an entirely different reason. We were wondering if you could make us a couple of baby cradles.”

“Cradles?” Will repeated. “That’s easy enough. I’m not sure where I’d work on them. I could talk to Mr. Bradley.”

“No need. I have a woodworking shop behind my house. I’m sure you will find everything you need. Just come over when you’re up and around.”

“I would like to do that,” Will admitted. “It sounds like a perfect arrangement. I could work at Bradley’s during the day and then come over there in the evening.”

“What about your work with the Indians?” Charlie asked.

Will shook his head. “I had decided that I wasn’t cut out for it, but now I feel it’s such a part of who I am that I can’t refuse. Still, I’m not sure that it will ever happen. Mr. Blevins said he had to move forward, and he couldn’t wait for me to mend. I wasn’t sure if he meant emotionally or physically, but either way I knew I wasn’t going to get a job offer.”

“I’m sorry about that, Will,” Edward said. “I guess we have a lot to pray about.”

“Yeah,” Charlie said, smiling, “just because Mr. Blevins has given up on you doesn’t mean God has.”

“I know He hasn’t given up on me,” Will said with a sigh. “I’m just not sure what it is He wants me to do now. Granite Evans offered me a job, so that’s another possibility. I don’t know what I’d do for him, but at least I’m not without options. Hopefully, the Lord will make things clearer than they are now.”