A Vine Mess (Love on the Vine #4)

9. Ella

I tried to listen to Dori as she pointed out landmarks along the way to the spot where we’d anchor and take the kayaks out, but I was having difficulty focusing over the blissful emptiness in my head.

All my thoughts seemed to have evaporated on the wind until there was nothing but the rush of the waves and the roar of the boat engine.

Liam stood next to me, content to let me enjoy the silence, and I was grateful for it. His hands, those broad palms and long, thick fingers, curled over the railing exactly as mine were, and I stole furtive glances at his tattoos.

Alfie didn’t have any ink, and god, something about seeing Liam’s skin marked—about recognizing how polar opposite he was from everything my ex stood for—awoke something positively feral in my chest.

That delicate rose on the back of his left hand.

The letters on each knuckle, spelling out “overcome. ”

The dark hair dusting over the lines etched into the tan skin of his arms.

Every inch of Liam Danvers was sexy as sin, what should’ve been a walking red flag wrapped in flannel and tight cotton tees.

But I’d be damned if I could find a single viable reason to stop myself from appreciating every single thing about him.

As though sensing my attention, he turned toward me, offering me a little smirk that did nothing to quell my body’s reaction to him. To avoid him seeing my face heat, I turned away, and I swore I heard a faint chuckle on the wind.

In truth, I had no idea what I was doing here.

What we were doing.

I desperately wanted to find out.

We cruised past the shoreline of the island, and an old, weathered lighthouse came into view. The shoreline below it was heavily fortified with posts forming a break wall of sorts.

“That’s the East Channel Light,” Liam said, pointing at the structure. “It was once in danger of collapsing into the lake as the soil below it eroded, but a group of people constructed that seawall to save the structure. It’s not operational anymore, but it’s been fully restored and is one of the most recognizable landmarks in the area.”

“It’s beautiful.”

“You should see it in the fall!” Dori shouted over the wind. “With the colors in the hills behind it? It’s unlike anything else.”

I looked at Liam. “Maybe we’ll have to come back.”

“Whatever you want,” he said quickly.

The words were a caress, and inherently, I knew it was a promise he’d make good on if I asked. Why did that thrill me so much?

Eventually, after lapping around the entire perimeter, Dori puttered to a stop in a small bay, one side lined by rocky cliffs that sloped into a beach on the other side.

“This is Trout Bay,” Dori said when the engine noise died down. “It’s the larger of Grand Island’s two bays and a popular spot for cliff jumping, swimming, and pulling up the pontoon onto the beach for some socialization.”

I took in the shore, where the leaves on the trees were budding and the sand was almost blindingly light. I could easily imagine it filled with people, laughter, children squealing, good drinks, and good food.

I inhaled deeply yet again, branding the silence and peace on my memory.

“Do we want to paddle around here?” Liam asked.

I shook my head. “No. I want to see the actual rocks.”

Dori gave me a salute, flipped the controls, and revved the engine out of there.

“We can explore the island next time,” Liam said.

Next time .

Damn I liked the sound of that.

Dori once again stopped and dropped the anchor in open water probably a hundred yards off the cliff faces.

To be perfectly honest, I was terrified of being on such a large body of water in such a tiny vessel, but the surface was incredibly smooth, showing barely a ripple, waves gently lapping at the base of the rocks. Dori assured us these were perfect kayaking conditions, and I trusted her. Given her weathered face and relaxed but vigilant demeanor, I knew she’d been doing this a long time and wouldn’t send us into any dangerous situations.

Plus, I had Liam nearby, and we wore lifejackets, so there was no reason to be afraid.

Once I got over the initial trembling in my hands as Marshall launched us off the boat, I marveled at how peaceful it was. The gentle sluicing of our paddles through the water, the birds cawing overhead, Dori’s voice as she explained how Pictured Rocks had formed. I tipped my face to the sun, letting it warm me right down to my core, making a silent promise to myself.

I wanted—no, needed —to be better.

And not as a human, though I thought we could all use work in that arena. I meant to be better to myself. I needed to stop letting the circumstances of my breakup and the things that had happened in the past control so much of my future.

“I should exercise more,” I said almost absently on the tail end of that train of thought, though I knew Liam could hear me.

“Why is that?” he asked, though his attention remained on the cliffs looming over us.

“My mind is…quiet.”

“You seem a lot more settled since we got here,” he mused. “Like maybe things aren’t bothering you as much?”

I nodded in agreement.

I’d felt that way too, and I loved that he’d noticed. It was impossible to focus on the bad shit that often swirled in my brain when confronted with so much natural beauty. It was hard to remain sullen and withdrawn when reminded that there was so much goodness in the world and in this life. I simply had to look for it and accept it.

Liam had no idea what allowing me to come on this trip with him meant to me—and for me—but I vowed to give him my gratitude at every possible opportunity.

By the time we returned to shore, my arm muscles were deliciously sore, and my mind was blissfully calm. I never expected something as simple as rowing a paddle through the water to be so difficult, but it ended up being a killer workout. With the sun on my face, Liam nearby, and Dori giving us all sorts of fun facts and history about the area, I hadn’t been so content in a long time.

But now, I was starving, and before I could say anything to Liam, my stomach made him aware of it.

He laughed and patted my tummy. “Don’t worry, Wildflower. We’ll get you filled up.”

The touch was so unexpected that I didn’t move, didn’t dare breathe for a few moments. Liam went about his business, helping Dori unload stuff from the boat and carry it up the hill toward headquarters, completely unaware of my minor internal freak out.

By the time he finished helping Dori and Marshall, I’d managed to unglue my feet from the docks and trek toward the building, meeting Liam at the door.

“So what’re you thinking for dinner?” he asked. “We could go to a sit-down restaurant, have some drinks and eat, or…”

He trailed off, eyes fixed on something over my shoulder, and I turned to find a white food truck fifty or so yards away, the words FRESH FISH emblazoned in blue on the side.

“Or…we could have fresh fish,” I said excitedly.

“My kinda girl,” he grinned, then gestured for me to lead the way.

There was a short line, and while we waited, I took the opportunity to just soak the day in. The sun was beginning to set, turning the sky a dusky pink and painting all the buildings golden.

When it was our turn to order, we went for a ten piece basket with fries, coleslaw, and beans. Before Liam could even reach for his, I’d already inserted my card into the reader, sticking my tongue out when he frowned at me.

“For today,” I said when I removed it.

“I don’t like it when you don’t let me pay,” he grumbled.

“That makes two of us,” I quipped as we stepped to the side to let the next people in line order.

Our fish was ready in minutes, and I pretty much drooled all over the to-go containers on the short trip between there and our campsite.

Actually, campsite was a misnomer.

We were spending the night in yurts .

Truly, I didn’t think people actually did that, but Liam informed me that, up here, there were a number of places that offered yurt accommodations, and I was wildly pleased.

So far, everything about this trip had been unlike anything I’d ever experienced before, and we were less than twelve hours into it. I couldn’t wait to see what the rest of the journey would bring.

Liam checked us in while I waited in the van, nibbling on a piece of fish and groaning loudly at its deliciousness. Crispy breading that gave way to tender, perfectly seasoned meat beneath. The coleslaw added a nice fresh, acidic burst of flavor to the heavier textures of the fish.

I was in heaven.

In fact, when Liam returned to the van, just as he slid behind the wheel to direct us into a parking space closer to our accommodations, I let out a low, long moan around a particular bite that had his head whipping toward me.

“Ella,” he warned.

“Yeah?” I asked, not bothering to look at him as I licked crumbs from my fingers.

“You can’t make sounds like that.”

My forehead creased as I turned to him. “Why not?”

He cleared his throat awkwardly, a flush appearing high on his sharp cheekbones. “I’m a man,” he growled. “I can’t—”

Helplessly, he gestured at his crotch, and it took everything in me not to allow my eyes to drift there. It all clicked anyway.

I was turning him on, and he was asking me to knock it off.

Putting the van in gear, he drove around the building and rolled us to a stop in a little lot along the tree line where a silty path disappeared into the woods.

The tension between us was so thick, you could cut it with a rusty spoon.

“Sorry,” I murmured.

Liam huffed out a laugh. “It’s okay. Just…part of the job description.”

“Of being a guy?”

“Of being around you,” he said quickly, then clapped a hand over his mouth, eyes wide. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. ”

I gave him what I’d hoped was a reassuring smile but it felt forced and brittle. “It’s okay.”

Clearing his throat again, he unceremoniously opened his door and threw himself from the van in an effort to get away from me.

I met him at the back of the vehicle, which he’d already opened and began digging through in search of his things.

“What will you need for tonight?” he asked, his tone clipped.

I stared at the side of his face, equal parts annoyed and confused by his change in mood. I couldn’t fucking control how people reacted to me, and the fact that he’d so quickly gone from… flirting with me—there was no other way to describe it—to this was disconcerting and disheartening.

When he didn’t acknowledge me further, I surveyed my luggage and pointed at one of the duffels, my backpack, and the reusable shopping bag I knew was layered at the bottom with a sweat suit and my toiletries.

He raised a skeptical brow but still kept his eyes off my face. “That’s it?”

I shrugged. “That’s it.”

Liam pulled the bags free and, arms laden with both my things and his, he jerked his head in the direction of the path, a sign pointing us toward Paddler’s Village.

“Wow,” I breathed when the wooded area opened up onto a large swath of sand, several yurts constructed sporadically along the water. They were a mix of red and green, draped in some sort of waterproofing material, and bigger than I expected.

Liam shot me a quick smile over his shoulder—though it was forced and brittle. “Pretty neat setup. ”

Neat wasn’t the word I’d use.

Peaceful was more like it.

It was early enough in the season that no one was here but us, and I relished that fact. That we had this entire stretch of beach, with the cold Lake Superior waters gently lapping at the shore, a canopy of budding trees at our backs, and the soft sand between my toes.

“This one is yours,” Liam said, walking up the steps to a yurt with an iron number two affixed beside the door.

I followed him, excitedly dancing on the balls of my feet while he unlocked it, then handed me the key before he pushed inside.

Truthfully, I had no idea what to expect. I wasn’t exactly well-versed in the camping experience. But I was pleasantly surprised.

“This isn’t so bad,” I told him as I pushed past—careful not to come into contact with his body; he didn’t need any more ammo to be a jackass—and into my home for the night.

First, I was most surprised by its spaciousness given its circular shape and how small it appeared from the outside. The walls were treated wood, stained lightly to let the natural grain shine through. The scent of fresh pine hung in the air, mixed with some sort of artificial freshener that reminded me of fall. It was clean, well lit, and both the bunk beds and sofa pushed to opposite sides looked plenty comfortable.

Liam snorted. “Don’t get used to it, Wildflower. There are some points on this trip when we’ll definitely be roughing it.”

“I can handle rough,” I quipped.

Liam’s gaze dipped to my mouth before jerking back to my eyes. “I’m sure you can. ”

Fuck. I’d really stepped in it with that comment, and now my mind wouldn’t stop conjuring images of Liam’s strong, working-man’s hands on my body. Throwing me around. Pulling my hair and leaving fingerprints on my thighs.

And he really had to stop replying so suggestively. In the same way he was a man, I was just a girl, and I could only handle so much. We’d only been together for eight hours and the constant back and forth was already giving me whiplash.

He scrubbed at the back of his neck, breaking the tense silence by saying, “Want to eat at a picnic table and watch the sunset?”

“Sure,” I said, gesturing the way out.

He left well ahead of me, and when I was alone, I rifled through one of my bags until I came away with a small brown paper envelope that held a collection of wildflower seeds. Seeds I’d been carefully collecting and mixing into packets for the past few years, waiting for the perfect opportunity to start spreading them around.

And what better time than a cross-country road trip?

I still carried the food so, seeds stowed in my back pocket, I made my way toward a table up the beach a ways while Liam dropped his things in his own yurt—right next to mine.

I refused to let that knowledge burrow in, to consider the fact that we were alone on this trip, on this beach, and tonight only a few walls and a short walk would separate us. If we wanted to, we could easily say “fuck it” and let our errant words turn from mere ideas into the real deal.

But hopping into bed with a new guy wasn’t what I’d been thinking when I vowed to be better to myself. I need to focus on me and only me , full stop .

Liam was doing me a solid here, letting me tag along on this trip. I could easily ignore the tension as well as admire him—the way he moved, how he filled out those jeans, his tattoos—from afar and not make it weird. I wasn’t even trying to pretend I wouldn’t ogle him. The man was fucking gorgeous, impossible to look away from.

But what I desperately needed right now was a friend. Someone who wasn’t related to me but maybe wouldn’t mind listening to me if I needed to get some things off my chest in order to heal on this journey. Someone who took me at face value, good days and bad, and didn’t try to fix me like everyone else in my life seemed to want to.

Liam was a calming presence in that he made it okay for me to feel my feelings without hiding them behind a mask.

Even if my body was having other ideas about him. And even if he’d been acting like a bit of a dick for the last twenty minutes.

With him safely out of sight, I set the food on the table, then withdrew the packet of seeds, opened it up, and casually walked along the tree line, sprinkling them as I walked until they were all gone.

I had no idea if they’d be able to take root in this particular soil, but I figured if the trees could grow, so could flowers.

A few minutes later, Liam exited his yurt and, barefoot, padded down the beach toward the table I’d selected, dropping down next to me. Wordlessly, I handed him one of the takeout containers, which I’d split half of the fish into, and equally as silently, Liam tore into the meal.

My own was half-eaten, so I mostly picked at it while we sat there, not talking, watching the sun sink below the horizon, turning everything brilliant orange before the darkness descended.

A short while later, Liam cleared our trash and bid me good night, disappearing into his yurt without a backward glance.

I couldn’t help feeling like I’d once again done something wrong, but instead of going after him and demanding an explanation for why he’d suddenly gone cold and mute around me, I tipped my head back to look at the sky.