Accidentally Under Your Tree (Grand Ridge Christmas #1)

9. Will

One night before Christmas

I ignored my phone buzzing in my pocket. Jim stapled a piece of trim into place as I held it along the ceiling.

When a family party was canceled because of the treacherous roads, I’d wondered how I would withstand another day in this house. The roads were also why I was still Kelly and Jim's guest. I was stuck right where I was.

Early in the morning, I'd gone into the kitchen in search of coffee. To find Jim drinking from a mug. "Wanna help me with my 'Honey-do' list? A couple of things would be easier with two people. Lizzy would help, but she's been busy with work. Anyway, you in?"

I was. I really was.

Holding still was challenging for me under normal circumstances. Holding still while snowed in with a woman I couldn't stop thinking about—a woman who had already turned me down…

I was desperate for distraction.

Kelly was ecstatic to find us working through the list.

It was mid-morning, but we'd already crossed a few things off the list. We should move slower. I dreaded finding the end of the work.

My phone buzzed insistently as we took a step back, inspecting the trim now secure to the wall. Finally, the vibrating stopped only to start back up.

"Looks good," Jim jerked his head in approval.

I'd done a hell of a lot harder carpentry than this. Which made it laughable how much his approval meant. He'd painted the black crown molding to match the black built in shelving. It was an intense look. But the more I'd gotten to know Kelly, the more it fit.

"You gonna answer that?" he asked, my phone starting up again.

"Seems like maybe I should." I pulled my phone from my pocket to find Rose on the caller ID. Pressing it to my ear, I asked, "Aren't you in the other room?"

" Finally ," she groaned.

"What's up?"

"Check the Live that just posted."

"On our page?"

She made a disgusted sound. "Yes."

Foregoing the social structures of a 'goodbye', she disconnected the call. My lips pressed into a thin line. I searched for patience to deal with her bossing me around—all the time. In her defense, I was usually fine with it. I was slightly more irritable than usual.

"Uh, if you'll give me just a second," I said to Jim, taking a step toward the spare room. He grunted his agreement.

I opened the app to find the most recent post featured Lizzy and Rose sitting side-by-side wearing Christmas sweaters. Rose beamed at the camera, but Lizzy was giving it a side-eye that I felt in my chest. She'd signed her name on my heart with those knives for eyes. Even if it'd been a brief time, her effect would last.

I moved down the hall to find privacy in the spare room. With the door closed behind me, I breathed out a calming breath. My thumb hovered over the reel. Tilting my head, a crease pressed between my eyebrows. I tapped on the post. Through my speaker, Rose spoke to Lizzy, "Can you pretend to be happy to be here?"

Scoffing, she replied, "No."

Rose laughed, rolling her eyes. "Fine. Hello everyone, I hope you're enjoying your holidays! It’s been a really interesting time…here."

"Interesting," Lizzy agreed.

"Anyway, I don't know how much I've mentioned my twin sister, Anne, or I guess sometimes you go by Lizzy."

Looking square in the camera, she said, "Like, all the time."

With a smirk, Rose shook her head. "Fine. I'm the only one that wants to call you Anne. The point of all of this is that she will be around more. She is moving in with me, and you might catch glimpses of her—like a beloved house cat skittering out of the shot."

My heart swelled too big for my ribs. It was such a different message than that metaphor had served earlier this week. Instead of derision, she used it with affection. They would be okay and could continue repairing the damage done to their relationship. If I couldn't be with Lizzy, at least she and Rose could have each other.

Lizzy would continue to be in my orbit. I'd just have to ignore her gravity. Just like the moon could ignore the pull of earth.

I resented the jealousy I felt taking away from the appreciation I had for Lizzy and Rose's healing relationship, but I couldn't help the knowing that Lizzy would tolerate some attention for Rose, but not for me. Even if it was fair that their relationship was more meaningful than hers and mine.

"This concession, if you can't tell by how she is glaring at the camera," Rose went on, "is truly an act of love on her part. So, we wanted to introduce her to you. But we have a greater purpose for showing up on your feeds."

She turned her head, giving the camera her profile and directing the attention to Lizzy. Her cheeks were bright pink, and she'd gone still.

I knew they'd already filmed and posted, but I still felt the urge to tell Rose to back off. To put my body between Lizzy and the people watching on the livestream. Their reactions floating up the side of the screen like silent announcements that all eyes were on her.

Taking her hand, Rose squeezed it.

Lizzy kept her eyes down on her lap. Her voice was almost too quiet for the microphone to pick up, as she said, "I take it back."

Blind, stupid hope surged through me. There was no knowing what "it" was, but I wanted that sentence to be for me. I begged for it in the whispering corners of my heart to be for me.

"I hope you'll let me take it back." Lizzy's softened gaze met the camera. "I want to try."

A flurry of hearts fluttered up the screen—like butterflies taking flight.

Rose grinned at her sister with tender pride. "Good job," she mouthed.

"Thanks," Lizzy mouthed back.

"That's it from us. Anne and I hope you're having happy holidays, too."

The video stopped, frozen, with Lizzy focused on the camera through her eyelashes. My pulse thundered in my ears.

'I want to try.'

'Us' equaled her and me.

I'd spent the last two days fighting, and losing, against my disappointment. Struggling to accept that the relationship I desperately wanted with her wasn't possible. And in just a few short sentences, she'd changed the trajectory. We weren't written in the stars just yet, but if she would try, then we could be.

I would. Happily.

Before exiting the room, I grabbed the only gift I hadn't already placed under the Christmas tree. The hallway was empty. It only took two footsteps to stand outside of Lizzy's bedroom door. But it took me two attempts at knocking before I was successful.

Sweat prickled at the back of my neck, waiting the few seconds for her to open the door. A hallow of moisture formed around my fingers on the shiny wrapping paper in my hands.

The latch clicked as she twisted the knob. She leaned a shoulder against the doorjamb, biting her lower lip. Still clad in the adorable, ridiculous Christmas sweater she'd worn in the video—a kitten lying on its back playing with a Christmas tree ornament. She rolled the fabric between her fingertips.

Hugging the present to my chest in a way that did not make me feel masculine, I pinched it under one arm instead. I stuffed my hands in the pockets of my jeans to keep from fidgeting with my hands. Or pulling her against me. She'd said we could try, but she hadn't said that we could with her parents just down the hall. She might still want to be private.

"Did you see it?" she asked.

A smile split across my face. "Yeah."

Her head remained pointed toward her slippers. "I'm so sorry to go back and forth like this. It's not fair, and if you've changed your mind."

The need to touch her grew too strong, even if she wanted to keep us a secret for a while longer. Hooking a knuckle under her chin, I eased her to meet my gaze. "I haven't."

Her brown eyes slipped over my face, taking in my smile and the happiness alight in my gaze. "You're still willing to try?"

"I'm desperate to."

The soft pressure of her touch sliding up my chest to my shoulders drew hot lines across my skin. Even through my clothes, my body remembered her touch as if she were tattooing me. Forever branded by her.

I cupped her face in one hand and pressed my palm to her back, my fingers splayed.

The gift smacked on the carpeted floor. At least it wasn't breakable. But it was distracting enough. She paused, looking at it laying between our feet.

"What's that?" she asked.

My voice caught in my throat, suddenly self-conscious that I'd brought it. "It's just a little gift. It's probably lame to give it to you now."

"I like it when you're lame." She beamed at me as she bent to pick it up. "Can I open it now?"

I shrugged. "Sure. Just don't make fun of me too badly."

"I don't make any promises." She pulled on the ribbon I'd tied around the package. The tape released with a pop, and in only a few seconds, the paper pealed away revealing the planner's pink cover.

She blinked up at me.

My toes curled and uncurled on the carpet. "If you want to collect planners and never use them…you should collect planners and never use them."

Her lips pulled up at the corners, and I melted in her warmth. The space between our bodies closed in increments. Her mouth pulled mine to hers. Breath by breath. She possessed a magnetism I could surrender to.

"Thank you." she whispered, peppermint on her breath.

I pulled her against my chest. Where I knew she belonged. I'd known it since the moment I'd sat next to her in the hotel bar.

She fit. We fit.

Her mouth was warm and soft.

Finally, I could give her all of me. We didn't have to be secretive or hide.

At the end of the hall, Jim mumbled, "I told you so."

I could practically hear Kelly roll her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, you called it."

Lizzy pulled away, leaving me drunk on just her kiss. Tucking her head into my neck, she held me and let me hold her. It was a rare moment.

It was right.

Lizzy

Christmas Day

"It's freezing out there," Will hissed, slipping back under the covers of my bed.

His toes touched my calf, and I yipped. "Jesus! Did you go to the bathroom or the arctic?"

"Oo"—he wrapped powerful arms around my waist, pulling me back to his chest—"you're so warm."

Giggling, I squirmed. "I was. You're taking my heat."

He shifted his hips, nestling closer to my ass, his erection against the round curve of my cheek. Suddenly inspired, I shifted closer instead of further away. Gliding a hand down my thigh, he groaned. "The wiggling is nice."

"You're nice."

"Not as nice as you."

I burst out laughing. He shushed me, pressing his rough fingertips to my lips.

My shoulders shook, but I managed to stay quiet. I whispered, "You're so much nicer than me. Remember when you met me?"

His fingers traced the seam of my lips. Heat pooled in my core. A call and response.

He ran his hand down the column of my throat. He had to feel my blood rushing hot just under the tender skin. "I remember everything about meeting you."

"Then you should recall that I'm not very nice." My words were barely more than puffs of air.

"Clearly, we have two different versions of that night." Palming my ass, he squeezed. "Goddamn."

In the back of my throat, I moaned.

"Stay quiet. I want to stay here, and I definitely don't want to wake up your family. This is the best Christmas morning I've ever had."

"The absolute best?"

"Couldn't get better."

I ground my hips into his, thrilled at his sharp intake of breath. "Couldn't?"

"I don't think you can stay quiet enough."

"I can."

"What about the basement?"

"That was one time."

My body arched at the progress of his touch.

"Lizzy," he breathed my name in my ear, then pressed a kiss to my neck. "We have time. We'll have other mornings like this"—he pulled me tighter against him, his arms solid bans around my ribs—"just let me hold you."

I sighed. The heat and tension in my body were still there, but his words helped calm me. With the intimacy I found just being with him, I snuggled even closer.

"This is more than enough," he whispered

"Will had the idea of giving you my favorite things." I handed Rose the heavy overstuffed basket. Initially, I'd felt trepidation about the suggestion. That was gone now. I wanted her to know me. They were just things , but we'd shared so many before. The line between hers and mine were blurred when we were young. This gift was a little like that.

"So cute!" Mom beamed. She cuddled into my dad's side on the loveseat, his arm pulling her closer. Logs burned in the fireplace. It crackled and smelled like past Christmases trapped in the amber of my memory.

Mom, Rose, and I had fuzzy socks pulled up our calves. We'd discarded the blankets that had been on our laps. They lay in knitted puddles on the carpet. Dad kept eyeing the windows behind me and Will. He would open one any minute now.

But the fire would continue burning.

Just another Christmas tradition.

I sat crisscross applesauce next to Will, with the tree on my other side. He had one leg stretched out in front of him. His elbow propped on the knee of the other. Every once in a while, I'd glance in his direction, he'd look back with the most heartwarming affection.

I couldn't stop grinning.

We were one of those weird families that took turns opening presents.

All eyes were on Rose as she unfolded the chunky knit blanket off the top of the basket. I'd had to wash mine before giving it to her. There wasn’t time to order a new one. It made me happy to give her mine. Being overly sentimental seemed to be the theme of the day.

She held it to her face. "My God this is so soft."

"Isn't it lovely?"

"Hey," she exclaimed, setting the blanket aside and pulling two jars out, "I have these candles!"

"Do you really?!"

"Yes! They're my favorite too!"

We shared matching smiles, and Will rubbed a thumb up and down the back of my neck. My heart rate jumped, not just at his touch, but because it wasn't in secret. Once Will and I had made up yesterday, Rose posted about her and Will's breakup. She told their fans not to be sad, that they were both happier as friends. That their time trying out a romantic relationship had been the strangest few days of their lives. That it was a relief to be nothing more than pals again.

I hadn't ventured to the Internet since then.

Rose's mouth pulled to one side, looking down at the basket's contents. "This is the weirdest chess set."

Mom lifted her eyebrows, her lips pursed.

"It’s so funny," Rose continued.

I shot my mom an, I told you so face.

She rolled her eyes, but there was a pleased glint in them.

"Why are the elves so happy?" Holding the box, Rose showed the front image to everyone. "They're pawns. They're being used."

"That's what I said! And the gingerbread men bishops? That implies a strange religion."

"Mr. And Mrs. Clause hold an interesting court."

"I love the reindeer knights, though."

"They are cute."

"What was the other one?" Will leaned forward for a better look. The curve where his neck and shoulder connected became my sole focus until I remembered he'd asked a question.

"The rooks are snowmen." Rose and I said in unison.

"Gotcha." Settling back, he draped an arm around my waist.

She nodded. "Yeah, they're kinda a bummer."

"The elves are the big winners," I agreed.

"Clearly."

The combination of my relationship with Rose repairing, and the love blooming in my heart for Will, had me giddy with Christmas spirit. I was practically Buddy the Elf.

Stop being so corny .

But I couldn't help it. My sister and I were not only on speaking terms, but friends again. My parents were being incredibly cool about the turn of events.

And Will, with his sexy hands, was mine.

I was happy and grateful.

Being bold was really paying off.

Will's arms wrapped around my ribs. I breathed in the clean smell of his skin.

He kissed the top of my head. "God, I want time to stop."

Laying my head on his chest, I tried to nuzzle into him as much as I could. "Me too."

"Maybe I could push back my flight."

He and Rose were scheduled to fly home in four days.

"I won't be far behind you. I'm going to start packing within the minute you leave."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

I ignored the movie on the basement television screen, too busy absorbing every detail that I could of Will. It would only be a few weeks of missing him. I could make it.

Even if I didn't want to.

Deprivation had never concerned me much. It did this time.

There are phones and the Internet. It'll be fine.

He might have been thinking the same thing or sensed how my heart was growing heavy because his arms pulled me in even tighter.

Footsteps moved down the hall. Unlike our first time alone in the basement, we didn't have to pray that we wouldn't be caught.

The door to the garage opened, and the sound of large boots on the floor overhead was distinct and out of place—considering it was well after midnight. A man's voice drifted down the stairs. I recognized it was Lawrence, but he and Rose were too quiet to make out any of their words. They went back and forth, their tones changing from irritated to vulnerable.

"There's no logic in the way I feel about you." His voice had notched a little louder, anger biting at every word. When he continued, he was too quiet again.

But his pain echoed in my head.

They must have been standing so close. Close enough to hold each other. It lasted for minutes.

Why can't they just be together?

I'd asked myself this question so many times over the years. Every time, I recalled all the steps that had brought them down this path. Even just the few fights I'd seen were full of words sharp enough to cut. They were never careful enough. Never kind enough.

Eventually, he left. One step after another was all it took, but the weight of him lingered. Rose remained, glued to her spot for a few moments after the door closed, before retreating to her bedroom.

When it was clear she was gone, Will said, "That seemed…depressing."

"I don't ever want to hurt like that." I used to think that I didn't want to ever love like that either, but I suspected it was too late for me now.

Will hooked a finger under my chin. His eyes held mine with a burning intensity. He was staring into the deepest parts of me and wasn't looking away.

"I just want to be good to you," he promised.