AJ’s Fire (Hampstead Valley #3)

Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty-One

AJ

In our matching sweatpants, holding hands at Jackson’s insistence, we exited his bedroom and took the short walk down the hall, Mr. and Mrs. Dorso’s glare making the few steps feel like miles. I’d never met the couple, but their work and innovations had made them famous years ago, and their philanthropic endeavors and movie studio aspirations had kept them in the news ever since.

The coffee table was still askew, and I could see a greasy stain where the lube and butt plug had sat. This left us space to walk to the center of the room and stand in front of the two famous people, which is where Jackson dragged us.

“Mom, Dad. This is AJ Gordon. He’s my boyfriend.” Jackson’s father sat up straighter, like he was going to speak, but Jax continued. “I wasn’t expecting you this evening, obviously.” He muttered that last word. “But I’m glad you’re here, and I’m glad you get to meet AJ. He’s very important to me.”

Jackson paused to collect his thoughts, and his father respected it this time, keeping quiet. His eyes were on Jackson, hers were on me. I gave a soft smile in acknowledgment.

“I’ve been working up the courage to tell you I’m bisexual, and I was planning to do so this weekend. But you’re here now, and I’m happy to have you all meet, though I’m sorry”—he turned and said the last part directly to me—“I’m sorry it happened this way.” Turning back to his parents, he continued. “We had this whole plan. Come tell you guys next weekend, then tell AJ’s family and let them know at work. AJ and I work together. I’ve told you about him.” Jackson had done the hard part, and words were spilling out of him. “Who needs a drink? Dad? Aje? Beer? Mom, I’ve got some wine in the fridge.”

He took off, never letting go of my hand. His parents sat in silence as we bolted past them. In the kitchen, still clinging to my hand, he turned, wide-eyed, his breathing heavy.

“Deep breaths, cari?o . In, out. In, out.”

I took a step back, continuing to breathe in an exaggerated fashion before turning to the refrigerator and pulling out three beers. “Red or white for your mom?”

In, out, in, out before he answered with a weak smile, “White.”

“Okay.” I handed him a bottle opener for the beer and uncorked the wine.

When we returned, I handed both Mr. and Mrs. Dorso their drinks. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” I said before taking the chair opposite Jackson’s mother. Jackson remained standing.

Mrs. Dorso smiled cautiously at me as she took her drink. “You’ll have to forgive us. This is a lot to take in. We thought … Emily moved to the city. She’s expanding Wyecrest Entertainment. We’re expanding Wyecrest Entertainment, and we thought …”

“Mom, I know you think I’m going to come back to DE, and I know you think that Ems and I are going to get together, but I’ve never so much as intimated that. Think on it, just for a second, and you’ll see that I’ve never said it. I know the great Mandy Dorso is used to getting her way, and I’m so proud of the things you’ve accomplished because of it. But I’m a firefighter, and a Brooklynite, and I’m AJ Gordon’s partner.” He looked at me after he said it, and I smiled brightly. “I’ve been those things for the past five years, and I plan to be them for a long time.”

I wanted to jump up and hug him, but I remained where I was, nodding in agreement at his words. He looked at me, nervous but strong, and I smiled in encouragement. He took the cue and sat down, chugging his beer before continuing.

“Five years! I don’t understand, you’ve been with this … man for five years? I thought …” His mother looked at his father, who sat stoically looking at his son. Really looking at his son. “What about Emily? What about the company! Who …”

“Sorry.” Jackson glanced my way again, like he was filling up on strength through our connection. I was happy to be that for him. “Let me be clear. AJ and I haven’t been dating for five years. I haven’t been hiding anything from you for that long. I didn’t really realize I was bisexual until about a year ago. And then …” He looked at me and couldn’t help but smile. I noticed his parents take it in, and Mr. Dorso narrowed his eyes.

“I know it’s just another thing.” Jax stood and came to my side, sitting on the arm of my chair and taking my hand again. “I get that it’s just another way that I’ve othered myself in your eyes. Wrong profession, wrong sexuality.” He looked at me. “Wrong boyfriend. But I need you to understand that those things, those things are the most right things about me. I’m so sick of being a disappointment to you. I was going to tell you, I promise, next weekend. I’m sorry you think everything I do is wrong. But this is my life. AJ is my life.”

The flame that lived in my stomach surged, and I hoped Jackson could sense my love and my pride from his perch even as he focused on his parents.

“You led us to believe you were with Emily!” His mother was agitated.

“I never …” Jackson began, but his father spoke over him.

“He was never with Emily, Mandy. Think about it. We knew that. Just because we wished it doesn’t make it true.”

Mr. Dorso was looking at me as he said that last part, and then he continued. “You have to forgive us, Mr. Gordon, my son is right; we’ve become somewhat used to getting our way. And ever since Jackson moved to Brooklyn, we figured it would be an acceptable compromise if he ended up with Emily, and she managed our holdings for the family. Emily would be a safe choice, a logical choice.” Riley Dorso smiled for the first time since I’d entered the room. “I suppose we never should have assumed that a man who enjoys running into burning buildings would make a safe choice.” He stood and headed our way, and Jackson and I stood to face him.

“We’ve heard a lot about you over the years, Mr. Gordon.”

“AJ,” I interrupted as he extended his hand for me to shake.

“AJ.” He nodded as we shook. “Your father is the poet, no?”

“Clifford Gordon, yes, sir.”

“We look forward to meeting him,” Mr. Dorso said, emphasis on the word “we” as he turned toward his wife.

“We have some things to sort out, Jackson. About the trust and how it will run. Your father and I, we do want to retire, eventually. If Emily is not going to take over, we need to figure out how to structure … everything.” She looked at me with narrow eyes.

“Yeah, Mom. I get that. It’s probably time that we figure this shit out.”

She stood as well, and I stepped aside to give the family some space.

“And you’ll need a prenup.”

“Mom!” Jackson’s face turned adorably red, and he turned to look at me. My eyes crinkled in a way he’d told me he loved, and I laughed and shrugged.

“Yes. Of course!” I agreed without hesitation.

“Oh my God, Mom,” Jackson spoke over me. Mrs. Dorso hugged her son.

“We’ll see you on Easter?” she asked.

“We'll see you both on Easter?” Mr. Dorso asked before Jackson could respond.

Jackson looked close to tears as he nodded at his parents.

“Come on, Mandy. Let's give these boys some privacy. We’ll talk to them more next week. Maybe convince Jackson that a seat on the board of trustees wouldn’t be too much of a commitment.” Mr. Dorso wrapped his hands around Jackson’s forearms and looked at him before pulling him in for a hug.

Mrs. Dorso offered her hand to me and I enveloped it in both of mine.. “It is lovely to finally meet you, AJ. Jackson really has told us so much about you over the years. Your stepmother is Natalie Marchetti-Gordon?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Mrs. Dorso’s face truly relaxed for the first time. “We read one of her works recently in my women’s reading group.” Mrs. Dorso’s tone softened as she dropped my hand and wrapped her arms around her son. “We’ll see you boys next weekend.”

We walked the couple to the front door. Jackson closed the door on his parents and slumped against it, heaving a sigh of relief.

“You might as well tell me now.” He smirked at me, his hands behind his back, gripping the doorknob as if he was worried his parents might barge back in.

“Tell you what?”

“My parents are going to do a full background check on you. Skeletons in your closet? Secretly divorced? Filed for bankruptcy? I’ll know it all in a week.”

I walked to him and put my hands on his hips. “Well, there is the one secret.”

His eyes went wide. “What’s that?”

“I’ve been secretly in the closet and banging my best friend for the past eleven weeks and six days.”

He ran a hand down my arm, smiling softly as he did so, a look of love causing the color in his eyes to pop in new and remarkable ways. His hand traveled to meet mine at my hip, and he walked us back toward the bedroom.

“Making love, not banging. And I can’t believe you counted.”

“I think I’m right,” I muttered. “Might be off by a couple of days. So do we pull off the bandage and talk to my family tomorrow?”

Jackson flopped on the bed as he whined, “No!” He sat up and looked at me. “Oh god, I mean, you should come out on your own time. I support you fully.” I could practically hear the words “blah, blah, blah” at the end of that sentence. “But I don’t think I can go through this again so soon. Can we stick to the very excellent plan where we hide from your family until after Easter and then go up to Hampstead and tell them?”

I pushed Jackson back down on the bed and straddled him. “’Course, cari?o . Let’s stick to the plan.”

We rolled around on the bed until we were both sweaty and coming over Jackson’s hand, a stress relief we both needed. I thought I heard a text come through somewhere mid-romp, but I ignored my phone until the next morning.

I woke up with Jackson wrapped around me and had difficulty extricating myself. “Don’t wake up. Just running to the bathroom.”

I propped myself up in bed when I returned and spent a few minutes lost in looking at Jackson sleeping peacefully next to me. It may not have gone according to plan, but Jackson was out to his parents. I hoped that meant he’d find some peace.

I finally grabbed my phone from the nightstand that I’d come to think of as mine and discovered a text that had come in from Nat the night before.

Nat: Everything ok with you and Jackson? You didn’t seem quite as in sync as you always do. Jamie said an old girlfriend of his moved to town. Are you both finally settling down?

Nat was so obviously fishing. Ignoring all that, I texted Jamie instead.

AJ: Skipping brunch. Love to the fam. Congrats on coming out.

Jamie: No! Who will save me from making a fool of myself at brunch with Dev?

“It’s Dev now,” I whispered out loud. Jackson stirred, adorably, but didn’t wake.

AJ: Shit going on. All good. Can we talk this week?

Jamie: Busy pre-Easter week. After dance on Thursday?

I looked at Jackson, who had been joining me for dance lessons of late, and decided that would be the perfect time for the two of us to fill Jamie in on our shockingly similar secret.

AJ: Perfect. Love to the fam … and “Dev.”

My very mature brother responded with an emoji whose tongue was sticking out at me.

I called Nat later that night, knowing she would have been in the car with my dad, Josh, and Devon most of the day and hoping to catch her alone.

“Hey, Nat. I’m sorry about next week. We have to work Easter Sunday until eight a.m. and then I’m going to go with Jackson for Easter. He, um. He’s never invited me to spend time with his parents, and he finally has. I hope you understand I can't pass up the opportunity to finally spend the holiday with the Dorsos.”

“Oh, yeah, I can see how you’d want to take advantage of that.” The phrase “take advantage” rubbed me the wrong way, but I knew Nat didn't mean anything by it.

Hoping to steer the conversation away from Jackson, I continued, “Thanks for making everyone come down for Family Fun Day. I think Vera enjoyed it.”

“It looks like everyone had fun.” How did she make that sound like an accusation? “We worked with two really lovely kids who are living at the Center. They do such important work there, AJ. I just don’t understand how someone can toss kids away like that. It’s disgusting.”

“That's why we wanted to help.”

“I understand Jackson’s family gave a big donation, and the Center will be able to do some renovations.” Nat had turned the conversation back to Jackson.

“It’s not like they can’t afford it.”

“It’s really nice of them, supporting Jackson by giving to a small charity in Brooklyn. They fund whole foundations. I know he doesn’t always feel like he has their support. It’s important that they did this, for him as much as for the Center.”

“You’re worried about him?”

“I was worried about him. And you. Jamie said you two have been off. Did you have a fight?”

The phrase sounded so immature coming out of my stepmother’s mouth. I laughed as I responded, “We’re not in junior high, Nat.”

She lowered her voice. “Around the holidays you told me you might be seeing someone. Is he upset that you guys don’t … hang out like you used to?”

“It’s not exactly that either, Nat. We're not fighting.” How did she extract information out of me like that? I swear she should be recruited by the FBI. I sighed. “I shouldn’t be doing this over the phone, Nat. We’re gonna come up and talk to you, soon, so you can’t say anything before then, okay? Jackson and I are dating.”

“Oh!” Nat tried but didn’t sound all that surprised.

“He came out this year, and, I don’t know, I just realized that I like him like that too.” I laughed. “Sorry, now I do sound like I’m in junior high. Jackson and I are dating, and it’s pretty serious. I haven’t told anyone yet. Not even Jamie.”

“But you and Jamie were going through the same thing!”

“I know. But you know how he is, Nat. Always trying to help everyone else. He needed me, and I didn’t want to burden him. Jax and I have been working our shit out. And we’re ready to come out. We’re going to tell Jamie this week, and then we’ll travel up to Hampstead soon. I know you guys have met before, but I’m really excited for you to get to know him. To get to know us,” I added.

“That’s so sweet, AJ.”

Later that week Jamie met us at the Y for Vera’s dance lesson.

“Jackson, hey. Vera said you’ve been showing up occasionally.” Jax had been with me every week of the last six, but I didn’t correct my brother. “Wasn’t sure we’d see you tonight. I thought we could grab dinner after. No school tomorrow.”

Jackson nodded imperceptibly at me; a questioning look on his face. “Sounds good!” I responded.

We were in the front section of O’Doyle’s, Vera recapping her dance lesson while I ordered drinks. When the water arrived, and Jamie insisted Vera take a sip, it was the first time she’d paused in her narration of what had happened in the class that we had all been there to witness.

“You’re skipping Easter,” Jamie started.

“You talked to Nat,” I countered.

Vera had been provided with a children’s menu and crayons.

“Hey, Miss Vee.” Jackson drew her attention away from her father. “Pick a color.”

He held up the crayons, and she pulled one away. “Now let’s read this menu and decide what you’re having for dinner.”

“I always have the mac and cheese, Uncle Jax.” We may not have told anyone about us, but we spent enough time with Vera that she may have picked up on the change in our relationship. She had started calling Jackson Uncle Jax of her own accord. He pulled the menu between the two of them and started coloring. Vera joined in and started telling Jackson about the upcoming Easter holiday.

“We’re driving to Grandma and Grandpa Gordon’s house. Uncle Vance is there, and Uncle Joshy, and Uncle Hunter, but Uncle AJ’s not coming this year. Uncle Jackson, since you come to my dance practices, you're going to come to my recital, right?”

“Of course, princess,” I heard Jackson enthuse.

“Is Nat terribly disappointed?” I asked Jamie.

“Actually, I would say she’s thrilled, based on her tone when she told me, but she wouldn’t tell me why. Is this what you wanted to talk to me about?”

I slid my chair back, eyeing Vera, and Jamie did the same so that we were a foot or two away from the table. We scooched our chairs closer together, and I gave an up nod in Jackson’s direction. He and Vera were having a sword fight with their crayons, and occasionally Vera would “win” and get to color on the paper.

“I’m going to Scarsdale with him.”

“Holy shit, finally going to meet the Dorsos? Wow, like, actual famous people! Oh my God, you’re not going to end up just like Dad and Nat, are you? They still name drop President Fisher because they met him one time when he taught at HU.”

“It’s not like that, Jamie. I’m not going because I want to meet the famous people. Besides, I’ve already met them.” I looked at Vera and Jackson again. He may have been trying to listen in, but he was focused on keeping my niece distracted. I looked at my brother. “I’m going to spend the holiday with my boyfriend.”

You would think with what Jamie was going through at the time, he would have been able to process what I was saying. It took him longer than I would have thought. He stared at me. He took a sip of beer. He watched Jackson and Vera hovering over the menu. He looked at me again.

“You and Jackson?”

I nodded slowly. “Me and Jackson.”

“Since when?”

“Since the day I met him if I’m being honest.” Jackson looked up at me and smiled. A look I was happy to return as I continued. “But technically since New Year’s Eve, or last New Year’s Eve.” I shook my head. “It’s complicated.”

“You should have told me!”

“Jamie, you’ve been dealing with your own shit.”

“I’ve been dealing with my own shit for many years; that doesn’t mean I don’t want to help my brother!” The agitation in Jamie’s voice drew Vera’s attention, and she scowled in a way that reminded me of her mother. Jamie would be dealing with reminders of Anna for the rest of his life. He deserved to have a little fun with a younger guy, and he deserved to not have to worry about his brother while he did it.

“I will tell you the whole story. I promise. I’ll even lie on the couch while you push your glasses up your nose and ask me pointed questions.”

“You know it only works that way in cartoons, right?”

I glowered. “But for now, the short version. Me, him. Dating.” Jackson looked up again and winked at me before nodding and smiling at my brother.

“His parents know, but they’re … adjusting. That’s why Easter is important. It will be our first time being out. Being together. Nat knows because seriously, can anyone in this family keep a fucking secret from Nat? She asked one question, and I caved like I was caught in Wonder Woman’s lasso.”

“Vance,” Jamie muttered.

“Huh?”

I think Vance has a secret, and I think it drives Nat crazy.”

“Yeah, that’s probably right. He’s a pretty private guy. You okay with all this?” I asked.

“I mean, of course. I just wish you’d said something. We could have been going through this together.”

“Yeah, well, we can go through it now. You deserved your time.” I shouldered him. “Your experiment.”

Jamie lowered his voice. “You and Jax? Is it an experiment?” He’d heard his name despite Jamie’s whisper, so Jackson looked up again.

“Nah. I love him. Always have. I was just too stupid to understand what that meant.”

“Holy fuck.”

“Holy fuck,” I concurred.

Jamie lowered his head and his voice even more. “You know how Josh always talks about …”

“Anal?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Uh-huh,” I agreed, and we grinned at each other like idiots.

“You dumbasses,” Jackson countered, which earned him a “language,” from my niece. Jamie and I pulled in closer to the table, and Jamie reached a hand out for Jackson to shake. Jackson nodded as he shook it.

I positioned my chair closer to Jackson and placed a possessive arm around the top of his chair as I watched him play tic-tac-toe with Vera.