Alien Protector’s Mate (Latharian Mate Program #4)

Chapter 14

14

J ade lay awake, curled up into a little ball in the plush bedding of the guest room’s huge bed. It was softer than anything she’d ever slept on, but she couldn’t sleep. Her mind raced instead, replaying the day’s events on an endless loop. The kiss with S’aad, the confrontation in the market, the near-miss with Reav and his gang all swirled together in a dizzying whirlpool of emotion and worry.

She rolled onto her side, pulling the silky sheets to her chin. They whispered against her skin, cool and smooth, and she sighed. She should sleep. She needed to sleep. S’aad had promised he wouldn’t come in here, and she trusted him. Even though she hadn’t known him long, it was easy to see he was honest and genuine. When he gave his word, he meant it.

She opened her eyes, looking at the wall separating her room from S’aad’s, and her heart quickened.

S’aad. The big Latharian warrior-healer who had shown her more kindness in a day than she’d experienced in years… or ever. She couldn’t remember her parents, so she had no idea how they’d treated her. But they’d given her and Jared up. Hadn’t they? So it couldn’t have been that well.

S’aad would never give up his children. She knew that without asking. His handsome face filled her mind, and she shivered… those green eyes that seemed to see right through her, the strong line of his jaw, the way his sandy hair fell across his forehead when he bent over his work. Heat bloomed in her cheeks, and she buried her face in the pillow with a groan.

“Stop it,” she muttered to herself, her voice muffled against the fabric. She was just torturing herself. S’aad thought she was a boy. Didn’t he? So, nothing could happen between them anyway.

Guilt twisted her stomach into knots. She was lying to him. She wanted to tell him the truth, to shed the lies and let him see her for who she really was. But fear wrapped around her heart and squeezed tightly.

What if he was angry? What if he felt betrayed? Worse still, what if he immediately reported her to the mate program? The thought of being thrust into that system, of being separated from him and matched with some asshole alien warrior she didn’t know sent a shiver of dread down her spine.

And then there was Mr. Morgan. He’d sold her. What if he or whoever he’d sold her to discovered where she was through the program? The station suddenly felt less like a sanctuary and more like a gilded cage with danger lurking around every corner. She could almost hear her foster father’s drunken voice… feel the sting of his backhand across her cheek.

Her breath came faster, panic closing her throat over. Sitting up abruptly, she pushed her tangled hair out of her face. She wasn’t sleeping tonight, and her skin felt itchy and uncomfortable. She needed a shower. Needed to wash away the grime of today’s events… and perhaps she could wash away her guilt as well. At the very least being clean might help her fall asleep.

She slipped out of bed, her bare feet silent on the cool floor as she crossed the room to press her ear to the door. The low murmur of S’aad’s voice drifted to her from the main room. He was speaking to someone though she couldn’t make out the words. Perfect. She could sneak into the bathroom without being noticed.

The bathroom was a marvel of alien design, all sleek curves and shimmering surfaces. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and looked away quickly, unable to bear the sight of herself at the moment. Stripping quickly, she started the water, waiting until the steam had fogged the glass on the shower cubicle before stepping inside.

The hot water cascading over her body, washing away the grime and tension of the day, made her groan in relief. She stood there for long moments, her eyes closed, under the hot spray. Then she reached for the shower gel, the scent of the alien soap filling her nostrils. It was vaguely floral but with an underlying spiciness that meant it wasn’t feminine at all. It smelled like S’aad, she realized, and suddenly, she wanted it all over her body.

Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t hear the soft whir of the door mechanism. It wasn’t until a rush of cooler air hit her wet skin that she realized she wasn’t alone anymore. Her eyes flew open, locking with S’aad’s shocked green gaze.

Time froze for a heartbeat. Then with a squeak of panic, she dove for her towel as S’aad whirled around, turning his broad back to her.

“Oh goddess, I’m so sorry!” S’aad’s deep voice was filled with mortification as he ran his hand through his hair. “The door mechanism has been malfunctioning for months. I should have had it fixed, but since I live alone, I never bothered.”

She wrapped the towel around herself in a frantic blur of movement, her heart pounding so hard she was sure he could hear it even over the sound of the running water, and then grabbed another one to drape over her shoulders. Luckily, the towels were made for someone S’aad’s size, so they swamped her, but right now, even a tent wouldn’t cover her enough.

She shivered as water dripped from her hair, running down her neck and back.

“It’s okay,” she managed to croak out, her voice higher than usual in her panic. How much had he seen? The room was pretty fogged up with steam but still… She cleared her throat, forcing her voice back down to a more masculine register. “No harm done. I’ll just… I’ll go get dressed.”

She edged toward her bedroom door, keeping her eyes fixed on his back. He remained perfectly still, clearly trying to give her as much privacy as possible in the awkward situation. Just as she reached the door, he spoke again, his voice low and strained.

“Jay, I… I really am sorry. I hope this doesn’t make you uncomfortable. Your privacy and safety are important to me.”

The sincerity in his words made her chest ache. Here she was, lying to him about who she was, and he was worried about making her uncomfortable. The urge to confess everything bubbled up inside her, but she swallowed it down.

“It’s fine, really,” she said softly. “These things happen. No need to worry about it.”

Before he could respond, she slipped into her room, closing the door behind her with a soft click. Her legs shook as she leaned against the door, closing her eyes and taking deep breaths to calm her racing heart.

Once she felt steadier, she got dressed quickly, pulling on a sweater and jogging pants she’d liberated from one of the boxes in the closet. Her hands shook as she realized how close she’d come to being unmasked. But even as she tried to push the incident from her mind, Jade couldn’t shake the image of S’aad’s shocked expression. Had he seen something? Suspected something? And why did part of her wish he had?

She slumped onto the bed, burying her face in her hands with a groan. This was a mess. A complete and utter mess. She was in way over her head, playing a dangerous game she had no idea how to win.

The sound of the shower starting up again in the bathroom made her whip her head up, her eyes widening. Shit, was S’aad showering now?

She crawled back into bed, pulling the covers up as images of his muscular body flashed through her mind. She shook her head violently, trying to clear it and get rid of the dangerous thoughts…thoughts of what would have happened if she’d walked in on him, seen him in the shower. She squeezed her eyes shut, determined to fall asleep and put this whole embarrassing incident behind her.

But then she heard it… a soft whir as the bathroom door slid open again. Her eyes flew open, and before she could stop herself, her gaze was drawn to the mirror opposite her bed. Through it, she had a clear view into the bathroom… and of S’aad in the shower.

Steam curled around his tall form, water cascading over muscles that rippled with every movement. His skin glistened, marked here and there with scars. Her mouth went dry, her pulse speeding up as her eyes traced the strong line of his back, down to…

She jerked her gaze away, burying her face in her pillow with a muffled groan of frustration. This was wrong. She shouldn’t be looking. S’aad had trusted her, had taken her in and given her a chance when no one else would have. And here she was, ogling him like some lovestruck teenager and violating his privacy when he’d been so distraught at the idea he’d done the same to her.

Even though she told herself to look away, she couldn’t. It was like the sight of him had cast a spell over her, and all she could do was keep looking. Keep watching him. She knew he was powerful, a dangerous warrior, but the way he moved with such quiet confidence, how he handled his responsibilities, and the kindness in his eyes when he looked at her got to her on a soul-deep level.

She bit her lip. What would it be like to join him in the shower as herself? To be held in those strong arms, to feel his skin against hers, and to run her fingers through his damp hair? A rush of longing so intense it took her breath away washed through her.

But then reality crashed back over her in a cold wave. She was lying to him. About everything. He thought she was Jay, and every moment they spent together, every moment he thought he was getting to know Jay was a lie. Even if she told him the truth, and he forgave her… she was human, and he was Latharian. Worse, she was a woman. The first thing they would do would be to register her for the mate program.

All those thoughts were washed away as he turned around in the shower, the spray of water hiding her view of his body for a moment. When the steam parted, her gaze slid down the carved muscles of his chest and torso to lock on to his erection jutting proudly from a nest of sandy curls.

Her eyes widened, a small gasp falling from her lips.

It. Was. Huge.

He was huge.

Way bigger than any human male she’d ever seen in the holo-porno’s she’d managed to stumble onto in the library’s archives. Veiny and thick, his cock arched upward toward his flat stomach, the tapered head flushed a dark violet color that was almost purple. A bead of precum gathered on the tip, glittering in the bathroom lights.

She swallowed around the lump in her throat, unable to tear her eyes away. She’d known he was built, but this… no, she never could have imagined this.

In a heartbeat, her imagination went into overdrive as fantasies filled her mind. Fantasies of stepping into the shower with him…. of wrapping her hand around him and stroking his hot, heavy shaft. Fantasies of feeling him stretch her wide open as he parted her around his thick, wide cock. Fantasies of…

She had to stop. She bit her knuckles to keep from whimpering, fighting the overwhelming urge to crawl out from beneath the covers and join him in the shower like all her instincts wanted her to do.

This was wrong. She should look away. She needed to look away. Right now. But she couldn’t. Instead, she stayed locked in place, watching as he rubbed soap over his wide chest and shoulders, and then as his hand slid down his abs to wrap around…

Her eyes widened so much she was surprised they didn’t pop out of her head.

Holy shit, was he actually?—

Shit, he was. Her breath caught as he pumped his cock. Worked it with long, slow strokes of his fist, the flared head playing peekaboo with her fascinated gaze. He tipped his head back, his eyes screwed shut as he chased his pleasure, oblivious to her watching him.

Her breath lodged in her throat as he sped up, stroking his cock with hard, fast pumps of his hand. Water sluiced over the carved planes of his abdomen, highlighting the ridged muscle she wanted to explore with her lips and tongue. She might not have actually had sex yet, but she’d watched enough of those old movies that she knew exactly what to do.

With a groan, he turned, bracing a hand against the wall and giving her a perfect view of his tight, muscled ass as his hips thrust into his fist.

Ohgodohgodohgod… the words rolled through her mind as she squeezed her thighs together, trying to ignore the ache blooming low in her belly. Between her thighs. Her hands curled into the sheets, knuckles white with restraint. She knew she should look away, that this was a huge intrusion, but she couldn’t bring herself to.

S’aad turned again, leaning against the wall. His eyes were shut, his hair plastered to his head and streaming across his shoulders. His grip turned frantic, his massive length pistoning in his fist as the wet sounds of flesh on flesh seemed obscenely loud despite the rush of water. Low groans poured from his throat, the vibrations seeming to echo through her body.

Then he froze, his muscled body taut as a bowstring and his lips parted on a choked inhale. Her pulse hammered, anticipating the moment of truth. Muscle bunched and flexed as he jackhammered his cock with savage intensity.

“Jay!” A strangled hiss, almost a plea. “Jay, I’m gonna… Draanth! Jay!”

His fist flew over his engorged length, the swollen shaft pulsing and jerking. He slammed his free palm against the tile, his elbow locking as his back arched, his head thrown back in bliss. With a gutteral roar, he erupted, thick ropes of cum sheeting the shower screen in front of him.

She yanked her eyes away from the mirror, her chest heaving as she gulped in great lungfuls of air. Her skin felt flushed, too tight for her body, every nerve ending she had hypersensitized and tingling.

Heart galloping, she squeezed her eyes shut and waited for S’aad to realize the door was open and storm her bedroom, demanding to know what she thought she was doing. But the bathroom stayed quiet save for the running water.

Then it hit her. He’d been stroking himself, made himself come, and called out her name as he did.

Jay . Holy shit. Was S’aad attracted to her? Err… him?

S’aad’s muscles burned as he parried another of Vaarn’s lightning-fast strikes. The clash of their blades echoed through the training room, mingling with the sounds of heavy breathing and boots scuffing against the padded floor. Sweat trickled down S’aad’s spine, soaking the thin fabric of his training shirt as he pivoted, narrowly avoiding a sweeping blow aimed at his midsection.

The familiar scent of leather and metal filled his nostrils, grounding him in the present moment. Yet despite his best efforts to focus solely on the sparring match, S’aad’s mind kept drifting back to the events of the previous night.

The door that had slid open… catching glimpses of soft, pale skin through the distorted screen of the shower… the flash of long, blonde hair around delicate limbs. He hadn’t seen enough to get a good idea of Jay’s body but enough to have him wrap his hand around his cock and make himself come harder than he’d ever come before…

Then he’d realized the door was open. The idea that Jay could have been watching him as he made himself come had fueled his fantasies and kept him tossing and turning all night.

The memories sent a jolt of heat through his body, distracting him from Vaarn’s next attack. He stumbled, barely managing to block the incoming blow.

“You’re distracted,” Vaarn growled, pressing his advantage. The heavier-set warrior’s muscles rippled beneath his skin as he launched into a series of rapid strikes that forced S’aad onto the defensive. “What’s going on in that head of yours, cousin?”

He grunted, focusing on regaining his footing. His arms strained as he blocked blow after blow, the impact of each one reverberating through his very bones. Draanth, Vaarn could hit… and hit hard. Despite the fact that he had more muscle mass than S’aad, they were evenly matched.

“Nothing,” he muttered through gritted teeth. “Just… thinking.”

Vaarn snorted, a sound of disbelief that carried even over the clang of their blades. “Thinking so hard you can barely keep up? That’s not like you, S’aad.”

With a sudden burst of energy, S’aad pushed back, his blade singing through the air as he went on the offensive. The change in rhythm caught Vaarn off guard, and he managed to land a solid hit on his cousin’s shoulder.

He stumbled back, a look of surprise and grudging respect crossing his features. “Now that’s more like it,” he said, rolling his shoulder. “But don’t think this means you’re off the hook. Something’s eating at you, and I want to know what it is.”

S’aad lowered his blade, his chest heaving as he caught his breath.

“It’s… complicated,” he said finally, running a hand through his sweat-dampened hair.

Vaarn raised an eyebrow, his expression a mixture of curiosity and concern. “Complicated how? We’re family. You can talk to me. You know you can.”

S’aad sighed and crossed to the edge of the training mat where they’d left their water bottles. He took a long drink, savoring the cool liquid as it soothed his dry throat.

“It’s about Jay,” he admitted, his voice low.

“The human boy you took in?” Vaarn asked, moving to stand beside him. “What about him?”

S’aad closed his eyes, the memory of Jay’s flushed face and quickened breathing when they’d kissed flashing through his mind.

“I think he’s attracted to me,” he admitted, the words feeling strange on his tongue. “And I think I’m attracted to him.”

Vaarn was silent for a moment, and when S’aad finally looked up, he saw a mix of emotions playing across his cousin’s face. Surprise, understanding, and something that looked suspiciously like amusement.

“And this is a problem because…” Vaarn prompted, his tone carefully neutral.

S’aad felt a surge of frustration, his grip tightening on the water bottle until the plastic creaked in protest.

“Because he’s human, Vaarn. Because he’s young and vulnerable, and I’m… I’m supposed to be protecting him, not…” He trailed off, unable to voice the thoughts tormenting him.

Vaarn’s expression softened, understanding dawning. “And you’re falling for him?” he finished gently. “I get it. I mean, I really get it. Humans are… mesmerizing. Infuriating at times but utterly mesmerizing.”

S’aad nodded, feeling a weight lift from his chest.

“It’s not just that,” he continued, the words tumbling out now that he’d started. “What if I find my match? What then? I can’t… I can’t start something with Jay knowing it might end up hurting him.”

Vaarn was quiet for a moment, frowning in thought. When he spoke, his voice was measured, careful. “S’aad, have you considered that maybe… maybe Jay could be your match?”

The suggestion hit him like a laser bolt, sending a jolt through his system. He shook his head, trying to clear the sudden fog of confusion and hope that threatened to overwhelm him.

“No… That’s impossible,” he managed. “Jay’s male. The matching system isn’t set up for that.”

“Why not?” Vaarn shrugged. “It’s just genetics and personality profiles. Isn’t it? Maybe it’s only set up that way because you don’t have any human males in the system?”

“We don’t—” S’aad paused, the edge of a memory stalling his brain. “Actually, we do.”

Vaarn arched an eyebrow, inviting him to continue.

“Early on, when the program was in development, one of the matches was picked up because a human male’s DNA was in the system,” he said. “We only had a small corpus of data on humans at that point, so we used what we had, and it picked up a match.”

“Between a human male and a warrior?” Vaarn asked in surprise. “I didn’t think there had been any same-sex matches.”

S’aad shook his head. “It was only a partial match, but it led us to pair the warrior with the human male’s mother. So it does work… you’re right. We just don’t have the data because we’ve never looked at it that way before. But… the program is set up for matches that will result in offspring?—”

Silence fell between them at the undeniable truth. Even if there were matches between males out there, they would do the Lathar no good. They needed females to birth the next generation of warriors and save the species from extinction.

Then S’aad noticed Vaarn’s odd expression. “What?”

“It might be nothing,” his cousin said. “But Sadie mentioned something interesting the other day. She said something was ‘different’ about Jay, something she couldn’t quite put her finger on.”

S’aad’s head snapped up, his eyes narrowing.

“Different? Different how?” he demanded, a sudden surge of protectiveness flaring in his chest. The thought of anyone, even Sadie, scrutinizing Jay too closely made him uncomfortable in a way he couldn’t quite explain.

Vaarn held up his hands in surrender. “Easy, cousin. I don’t think she meant anything by it. Just that something about Jay was odd. She didn’t elaborate more than that because Ollie was fussing, and she felt ill again.”

“I see,” he said and then frowned. “Sadie’s feeling ill again?”

Vaarn nodded as he slung his towel over a broad shoulder and picked up his water bottle. They were both pushing time before their duty shift, so training was done for the day. “Yeah, it’s been on and off for a week now.”

He inclined his head thoughtfully. “I think it might be wise for you to book her in at the medical center. Get her checked out.”

Vaarn’s brows snapped together, worry filling his eyes. “Why? Do you think she might be ill with something? I swear… I tell her to say away from that damn market! Half the draanthic in there haven’t had all their shots.”

“No, I don’t think she’s ill.” He grinned, clapping a hand on his cousin’s shoulder. “I think you two might be about to make me an uncle again…”