All I See Is You

6. Porch Swing Angel

Chapter six

Porch Swing Angel

Quinn

H alfway through dinner and I still couldn’t puzzle together what I’d done to make Hux shut down like that. There’d been a definite shift in him when I’d brought up cowboys, but I didn’t know exactly why. His expression, his entire demeanor turned guarded, closed off in an instant. And I didn’t know him enough to know if I could push him for more explanation.

It was just as well, though. Whit might think that the entire purpose of this trip was to find hot cowboys and go buckwild , but I knew better. Not that she wasn’t going to try her hardest to change my mind. She’d made us plans with Travis and the other hands—Wyatt, Dylan, and Brooks—to go out later tonight. And despite my best efforts, a teeny, tiny part of me hoped Hux went too.

If anyone noticed my silence during dinner, no one mentioned it. Georgette told story after story with the occasional chime in from my dad. Like how serendipitous it had been for them to have met at an ocean-side bar in Turks and Caicos. How they’d had the most magical night and felt like they’d met the other half of their soul. All of those were Georgette’s words. Dad didn’t say much on the matter, he just let her rub her hands all over him. Not in an overly gross way, but, like, they were always touching one another or holding each other’s thighs, leaning into and pressing their head to one of their shoulders, pausing mid-sentence to smile and kiss.

Weren’t teenagers the ones supposed to be so handsy? Didn’t Georgette have any sort of decency? Didn’t he? Like, this was my dad. Didn’t he feel weird being so openly affectionate to his girlfr—fiancé in front of me?

I don’t know if Whit was genuinely curious, or if she was keeping Georgette talking for my sake, but I was grateful I wasn’t being expected to interact more than a nod or “wow” here or there.

“So, where are you guys planning on moving after the wedding? Are you going to stay in Texas or maybe come back to California?” Whit asked, sipping her wine. Her words snagged my attention. I’d been wondering the same thing.

Georgette’s forever smile dipped for a moment. “What do you mean?”

A sense of unease simmered to life in the pit of my stomach. “Dad said that you guys were renting this place for the month of the wedding to make planning it on such short notice easier. He hadn’t mentioned where you all were going after.”

She glanced at my dad, her head tilting to the side as she said in that high-pitched, sugary-sweet voice of hers, “I thought you told her.”

I cocked my head to the side, the unease turning to straight up dread. Why did I get the sense I wasn’t going to like this conversation? This feeling had been manifesting, growing all throughout dinner, bubbling to life like water boiling in a pot. It started slow, but gained and gained and gained in intensity until all it could do was bubble over. “Told me what?”

My dad let out a nervous laugh as he leaned back in his chair, cupped a hand over his mouth, and rubbed at his chin. “I was uh…I was planning to tell you just you and me, but, well…this is as good a time as any.” A luminous grin came to his lips as he threw his arms wide. “Surprise, Queenie. This is for you.”

I froze, the only part of me able to move being my eyelids as I blinked over and over and over, trying and failing to puzzle this all together. “Um…what?” I finally managed to sputter out.

He swept a hand out at the gorgeous dining room. It gave off elegant, masculine men’s club vibes with its dark oak walls, ornate chandeliers, and matching sconces that burned low and warm. A wet bar filled with a number of fancy glass decanters full of whiskey took up the entire western wall.

“I wanna turn this place into a full on destination ranch. Weddings, retreats, business trips, you name it. Georgie and I are gonna buy us some of those tiny homes and put them on the property to use as little guest cabins.”

“There’s a herd of about a hundred cattle,” Georgette chimed in, a satisfied grin on her face. “And we’re gonna offer small, all inclusive, elegant cattle drives to those who can afford it. And, well…” She rose from her spot beside my dad and made her way around to grab my hands in hers. Squeezing softly, she offered me a bright smile. “We don’t see anyone better than you runnin’ it, sweetie.”

I know that she wasn’t trying to be condescending, but I hated her so much in that moment. Her stupid smile, the way she held my hands, and how they didn’t even ask me what I thought of this whole business venture.

I know most people would probably be over the moon about this opportunity, and even though I was grateful I found myself saying, “I…I have a job.” Pulling my hands away, I looked across the table to my dad. “You were so excited for me when I told you I officially landed the gig.”

Did he not believe in me being able to make it on my own? Even after putting in the hard work, the four years of college to get to this point, did he think I’d fuck up so royally that he felt the need to coddle me? Or was this some sort of left over guilt from Mom passing away and him basically going off the deep end, leaving me to all care for myself? Was this his way of trying to take care of me?

“I was!” Dad said, his words ringing with sincerity. “But I know you’ll do fantastic running things for me.”

His words hit like a punch to the face. He didn’t even expect me to argue, but to just accept the offer. My heart pitter pattered in my chest like someone learning to tap-dance. Off key and too erratic. Disappointment welled inside me. I should have known that there was more to it than just the wedding. Now, things started to make sense.

Dad was always looking for a way to make more money. I swear, since Mom died, it was his main, driving force. And how convenient was it for him to have a daughter who could work his latest business venture? Yeah, a part of me was honored that he believed in me, even if it might be for selfish reasons, but running an entire event venue? I’d just gotten my BA in Event Management. I’d only just gotten a job with an venue in Beverly Hills, I couldn’t imagine being in charge of an entire event ranch. Not to mention, I couldn’t just drop everything in California and move here on a whim. I mean, I could, technically, but California was home. It was where Mom was buried. The thought of leaving felt like carving out a chunk of my soul.

Tears burned in my eyes. From anger, or frustration, or confusion, I didn’t really know at this point. It didn’t matter in the end, either. I scooted my chair away from the table and met my dad’s stare.

The hopeful smile on his face faded at the emotion he found lurking on mine. “Queenie?”

“I…I need a minute,” I managed to choke out. It was the only thing I could say that wasn’t filled with expletives and made me sound like I was being selfish.

Without giving them time to respond, I walked out of the room. To where, it didn’t matter. I ignored his shouted protest as I stormed out the front doors and off the porch, down the main gravel road leading toward the stables and the rest of the property. Now that the sun had dipped on the horizon, it was almost nice out. The humidity seemed to have lessened a bit, a light breeze picking up and blowing my long hair in the wind. It didn’t stick to me like it had earlier, so that was a plus.

I didn’t try to fight the tears that fell. I’d always been a crier. Something Dad hated, and Mom encouraged. She’d always been going on about being in touch with your emotions, feeling the feelings—all of them. Good and bad. Highs and lows. I wondered what she would think of all of this. Would she be on my dad’s side or mine? She’d always been so good at making us both feel validated. What I wouldn’t give to know her thoughts right now.

Movement caught my eye, and I looked up to find a dark-clothed figure making their way out of the ranch hand barn with a dog at their side. Even though I’d only met him today, I recognized the hat, the broad, muscular build, the shoulder-length hair. And while I was a crying, blubbering mess, I found myself calling his name.

He froze mid-stride, before turning my way slowly. I crossed the thirty or so yards between us, stopping a few feet away from him. “Hey,” I said softly. “It’s—”

“Quinn,” he replied. “I’m blind not an idiot.”

A laugh worked its way out of my mouth at the bluntness in his words.

“Sorry,” he said, the lines of his face softening. “I didn’t mean for that to come off so dick-ish.”

“No worries…” I glanced down at the dog beside him, immediately recognizing it from earlier. “Is this your dog?”

“No.”

I frowned. “Oh…sorry, I—”

“I’m just jokin’,” he replied, holding a hand out at his side. The reddish brown dog leaned into his touch. “This is Rusty.”

“Is he, like, your seeing eye dog?” Was that insensitive to ask?

Hux nodded, one of his shoulders lifting into a casual shrug. “Yes and no. He ain’t registered or anythin’ like that, but he’s a good companion, and he helps me get around.”

I smiled. “He’s gorgeous. What kind of dog is he?”

“A Kelpie.”

“I’ve never heard of it.”

“They aren’t too common. They’re a workin’ breed. Mostly herd and work cattle.”

I liked to think of myself as a dog person, but I hadn't had a pet since I was a teenager and our old family Golden died. She’d been Mom’s and after both of them passed, Dad and I just couldn’t get another.

“That’s cool. What were you doing just now?” I asked.

He was so attractive it was almost painful to look at him. I know it was probably indecent of me, but I liked being able to take him in without the weight of his stare. I could take my time examining his features without seeming like a creeper. Though, that definitely made me sound creeper-ish.

“Checkin’ on the horses one last time for the evenin’. I thought you had dinner with your pare–your dad and Georgette?”

I appreciated the correction. Georgette wasn’t and never would be my parent.

I rolled my eyes and blew out a breath. “I got upset and left.”

“Why?” His brow furrowed as he turned to face me more fully. His sunglasses stare wasn’t directly on me, but aimed in my general direction.

“I had no idea that my dad bought this place with the intent on running it as a destination ranch.” I launched into the details of it all; all the while Hux listened silently. “I don’t know if I’m being dramatic and a bit selfish, but I’m angry that he did this all without even talking to me about it first. And, well, I’m scared. This is…it’s a lot more than I expected to take on so early in my career.”

Hux lifted a shoulder in a shrug. “Ain’t nothin’ wrong with that. If it’s too much, it’s too much. You don’t gotta please him.”

“You don’t get it, I hate disappointing him.” Anyone in general. I was the epitome of a people pleaser. A perfectionist. And I had a problem with saying no. Dad knew it. That’s why he expected this of me.

“Who gives a damn what he thinks? If you live your life for others, you’re gonna lose yourself eventually.” He said the words with such ease, such nonchalance. It should annoy me, he was so blunt and brusque it bordered on being rude or callous, at the very least, but it worked for him. There was a raw honesty to him that I could appreciate.

I huffed. “Easier said than done.”

“Most things that are worth doin’ are hard.”

“You’re probably right…actually, I know you’re right, it’s just…”

“Hard?” he offered.

I nodded, and we descended into stilted silence. I glanced up at him, finding his expression expectant, like he was waiting for me to say something. “Oh shit, yeah. You’re right. Sorry,” I breathed, a soft chuckle floating between us. “I nodded, but you…” my words trailed off, a wave of embarrassment flooding through me.

I’d have to remember to be more vocal. Mom and Dad always joked about how I didn’t even have to say a word, I wore all my expressions on my face. That wouldn’t work if I intended to be around Hux. Just the thought had butterflies fluttering in my chest.

“It’s okay. I get it. Not many folks are used to talkin’ to a blind person.” There was a hard edge to his voice, but I got the feeling it wasn’t aimed at me. More like himself. His circumstance.

I wondered if it was rude to ask him if he’d been born like that or if he’d gone blind. It probably was.

“You wanna know how it happened, don’t you?” he asked, his rough, harsh voice filling the silence between us.

I gaped. “Can you, like, read minds or something?”

A smile cracked on his lips, a genuine laugh escaping him. The rich, deep sound did something to me. And that smile…maybe it was because in the time I’d met him, I’d mostly seen him broody or shut off, but that smile was like a setting sun.

How was it possible to be so attracted to a stranger? I swear, I was majorly crushing on him… It was a good thing he couldn’t see me.

“Most people are curious,” he replied, before sighing. “I wasn’t born like this. I uh…I had an accident.”

There was a finality to the words that gave me the sense that if I pushed, he’d just shut it down.

“I’m sorry. How long ago did it happen?” I asked hesitantly, wondering if that question was off limits too.

“Three years this August.”

About a month from now. Holy God, I couldn’t even imagine how hard that must have been for him. I voiced the thought aloud.

A muscle feathered in his scruffy jaw, and he flexed his hand once more. Rusty leaned into him on instinct. “It’s…shit in a lot of ways. But, I’m not dead, so I guess there’s that.”

“I’m sorry.” That seemed hollow, but I didn’t know what else to say. What could you say to that?

He shrugged, petting Rusty for a long, silent moment. “Why are you apologizin’? It ain’t your fault.”

“I know, I just…” My words fell away again. Why did it feel like everytime I opened my mouth with him I put my foot in it?

“You goin’ out with Travis and the rest of the group tonight?” he asked.

“Yeah, Whit would kill me if I didn’t.” I bit my lip, nerves trickling to life in me. “Are you coming too?”

“Me?” He shook his head. “Nah, probably not.”

My heart sank. “How come?”

Another shrug. “Ain’t really my scene.”

I blew out a breath. “I get that. It’s not really my scene either… but not gonna lie, I was kinda hoping you’d come.”

He rocked back at that, his gaze still not quite fixed on me. The ever-present scowl on his face deepened. “Why?” Disbelief rang in the word.

I shrugged. More for my sake than his, and added, “I like you. You’re easy to talk to.”

“I am?” More disbelief.

I huffed out a soft laugh. “Yes, you are.” An idea came to mind—one Whit might kill me for, but I’m sure she’d forgive me if I groveled enough. “Hey, what if I stayed here and you showed me around instead?”

Bars had always been more Whit’s scene. I never understood why someone would spend so much money on a drink you could make at home for a fraction of the cost. Whit always mentioned something about that’s why you got someone to buy your drinks for you, but that just made me feel…weird. Why would I let some random guy buy me a drink if I had no intention of getting to know him?

The idea of staying here with Hux, maybe walking the property, talking some more—I don’t know, that sounded a lot more up my alley.

“Well,” Hux replied, “You’re, uh, in a much better position to show yourself around than I am. I don’t know what the fuck this place looks like.”

I know it was probably bad of me, but I laughed at that. He was so unapologetically blunt and honest. “I could tell you,” I offered. “Take you around and explain what everything looks like, and you could tell me how it relates to you and your work.”

Some emotion I couldn’t quite place rippled over his features. His lips pulled up into a soft ghost of a smile aimed in my direction. “You’d do that for a stranger?”

I shrugged once more, quickly reminding myself after a silent beat that I needed to respond. “I’d do it for a friend.”

He took a few steps toward me, close enough that I could feel the heat of him on my skin and the smell of his cologne. Something fresh and woodsy, with a hint of sweet. Maybe like teakwood and vanilla? I don’t know, one of the manly smells. My heart fluttered in my chest at his closeness. He stirred something within me I’d never felt before. Not even with Devin. Hux’s unseeing stare bore into me, and a little gasp escaped me at the intensity of it. And he was wearing sunglasses still. I couldn’t imagine how much more intense it would be if he wasn’t.

His words were a low rumble as he asked, “So, we’re friends?”

Why did it feel like he was asking something much more serious? Was it how close he was? How attractive he was?

“I’d like to be,” I breathed.

A grunt of…approval, maybe, escaped him. “I’d like that.”

I bit my lip, completely overwhelmed by the closeness of him, the heat of him, the weight of his stare. He intimidated me as much as he enchanted me. He had a commanding presence, one that demanded all of my attention. I felt like a deer in the headlights. I didn’t know whether to freeze or run. I’d never been around someone like him. Never felt so exposed, so vulnerable just by him looking at me. But as a shiver traversed down the length of my spine, I realized it wasn’t at all the bad kind, but one that whispered of excitement. Adventure. Desire. “Good,” I managed to squeak out.

The smile on his lips grew, pulling up at the corners. “I’ve changed my mind, let’s go out tonight.”

My brow furrowed. “ But, I thought—”

“I wanna take you out. But I am goin’ to take you up on that offer of showin’ me around at some point.” His words rang with finality. There’d be no convincing him otherwise, I could tell from the stubborn set of his jaw.

Another shiver went through me as I thought of going out with him. Honestly, just being around him in general. With a grin, I replied, “I probably should go get ready then.”