All I See Is You

19. In The End

Chapter nineteen

In The End

Quinn

I ’d hoped that maybe some sleep would miraculously fix all of my feelings from the night before, but the next day I still felt just as shitty. I think the biggest issue I had with this all was why. Why the sudden change in Hux? Why was the thought of me leaving in a month now a problem when it hadn’t even been a topic of conversation either of us had brought up at this point?

It couldn’t be just that. I doubt he’d admit it, but I’m sure it had, at least, something to do with the fact that my dad was marrying that god awful woman and Hux would have to be around her now and then if he pursued me. I didn’t really blame him if that was the case. I wouldn’t want to come around and subject myself to her ignorance if I were him.

I glanced at my phone, which I’d forgotten to put on the charger last night, and bolted upright. 9:45 AM. Shit . Whit had a flight home in, like, a couple hours, which meant we needed to get our asses in gear to get her back into San Antonio on time.

I pulled up her name on my call log and listened to it ring until it went to voicemail, then proceeded to send her a text telling her to get her ass back here.

All I got back was an: on my way.

Which was annoying and vague and told me absolutely not enough details. Where was she on her way from? The bedroom across the hall? The bunkhouse? A different place entirely? How long until she was here? Did I need to get her things ready? Speaking of getting ready, I needed to get myself ready.

So after asking her how long she’d be, I hopped in the shower, trying to wash away all of the feelings of the night before. Surprise, surprise, it didn’t work, and I hated the fact that I was being mopey and sad and letting this affect me so much.

Hux was just a guy. One guy—a guy who managed to make me feel more wanted in a day than Devin had made me feel in the entirety of our relationship. One who was kind, and honest, and hot as hell, and really, really, really knew how to make a girl swoon—

Oh my god, stop. You’re being ridiculous.

I could just imagine myself telling any of my friends back home about this and they’d probably all roll their eyes and tell me it was just an infatuation. That Hux was just a crush and these feelings couldn’t possibly be real.

Why did it feel so real then? This was the problem with feeling things so strongly. It wass hard to decide what was actually something big or small when every emotion pouring out of me felt so big. Mom always said it was a gift, Dad saw too much emotion as weakness though. So, as a result, I was constantly at odds with myself. Trying to feel my feels and temper my emotions all at the same time. It was exhausting.

By the time I got out of the shower and changed, Whit was in my room, packing up the last of her things into her carryon backpack.

“You know, when you sent me that panicky where are you text, I assumed you’d be ready when I got here,” she said, turning to look at me. The grin she wore on her face fell the moment she took me in. “You okay?”

I shrugged, a shitty idea coming to mind. Walking over to my suitcase and tossing everything into it, I said, “I’m fine.”

“Why are you packing?” Whit asked.

I refused to look at her as I retrieved my book off the nightstand and my charger.

“Quinn, what’s going on?”

I sighed and turned to look at her, fighting back the sting of tears in my eyes. “I wanna go home. I don’t want to be here anymore. I don’t want to plan my dad’s stupid wedding. I don’t want to run into Hux every day and see him and be reminded that I royally fucked things up.”

Whit was in front of me in an instant, wiping tears from my cheeks. “What the hell happened when I was gone? Why didn’t you text me? Do I need to kick Hux’s ass?”

I laughed through the traitorous tears that trickled down my cheeks and sniffled. “Please don’t. It’s not his fault.”

“Why didn’t you call me or text me? I’d have come back home last night.”

I broke away from her and finished grabbing the last of my things. “At least one of us deserved to have a good night. I was okay. I am okay.”

She gave me an are-you-sure-about-that look, which made me laugh.

“Really,” I went on. “I promise.”

“How about you tell me everything that happened on the way to the airport?”

“Or you could tell me about how awesome your date was with Travis?” I asked hopefully.

Even though a soft chuckle escaped her, I could sense her concern as she glanced at me once more. “ After you tell me about your night.”

“ S o, wait, let me get this straight,” Whit asked as we drove back to the airport. I hadn’t bothered saying goodbye to my dad. I was still ridiculously pissed about what had happened last night and Georgette’s inexcusable actions, and his, well, his lack thereof. I was pulling a trick from his book this time, and just up and leaving with nothing more than a text or a quick call from the airport. Guilt welled in me at the thought, but Whit’s next words dragged my attention back to her. “Hux basically admits that he knows he’s falling for you and doesn’t want to dive into things for fear that you’ll essentially break his heart when you leave, and then he kisses you?”

I swear, I could still feel the pressure of his lips against mine, the weight of that moment crashing around me. “I mean, yeah. And it wasn’t even just, like, a peck or a forehead kiss. It was, like, in the book we’re reading right now for book club.”

“The one with the super hot, morally grey shifter?”

I nodded, while keeping my eyes on the road. “Yep. Whit, when he kissed me, it gave me those same kick-your-feet, heart stopping feels that I felt the moment that the couple realized they were soulmates.”

“Spoilers! I’m not at that part yet.”

I let out a weak huff of laughter, shrugging my shoulders. “Read quicker.”

She laughed, but sobered a moment later. “Okay, being serious, though. So, your telling me that some hot as fuck cowboy kissed you like that, and you’re leaving ?” Her voice rose a couple octaves on the last word, complete and utter shock ringing in her tone.

“Whit, I can’t leave California. My job’s there.”

“Quinn…” I glanced over to find her dark brown eyes burning with a seriousness that she never, ever wore. “I understand how much getting this job meant to you, but you have an awesome opportunity right now to work for your dad as well.”

“I don’t even know any detai—”

But she cut me off. “So, sit your dad down, have him come up with a business plan, a job title, a salary and all the back-end aspects, take the month to get to know Hux, see if this is something more serious than a hookup, and then make a decision.”

“What about Georgette? I can’t live with her. I can’t plan her wedding.”

“Fuck, Georgette,” she huffed, before giving me a guilty grin and shrug. “Okay, but seriously. Think of it as a learning experience. You’re not always going to like your clients, trust me, I know. So, this is an opportunity to show that you can be unbiased and work with someone you absolutely despise but still give them the best event ever.”

I groaned, the thought already seeming like too big of a task. “She’s so fucking awful though.”

“I know. I mean, I haven’t seen as much as you have, but from what I have, I know .”

I sighed and glanced her way. “This is crazy. I can’t. What if it doesn’t work out with Hux?”

“Then it doesn’t! You’ll have gotten to spend a couple weeks sleeping with a hot AF bull rider that you can think back on as some wild adventure. Not everything has to be weighed and measured and done only because it’s beneficial. You’re allowed to do some things just for pleasure, you know—” she waggled her eyebrows. “Like Hux. Multiple times a day.”

There was no way to stop the laugh that bubbled out of my throat, but the minute I thought of last night, the light feelings in my chest withered to ash. “You really think I should stay?”

“Girl, you just had a guy give you a fucking mating bond worthy kiss and you’re really asking me that?”

I blew out a breath, my mind going back to that kiss for like the umpteenth time. Okay, maybe Whit had a point.

The GPS spouted off instructions about the exit coming up and I glanced over at Whit. “I’m sorry that I dragged you all the way out here to Texas, and then we didn’t even spend any time together.”

“Girl, I am definitely not complaining. Besides, I’ve already booked myself a flight back out here Friday morning for a redo girls' weekend. By the way, can you pick me up from the airport?”

I loved that she didn’t even try to pretend that I was getting a flight home today. She knew me more than I knew myself sometimes.

“Is that even a question?” I grinned. “So, are you and Travis an item?”

Whit smirked and offered a noncommittal shrug. “Nah, just keeping it casual. He’s cute and kinda oblivious, which I like. he's definitely not boyfriend material, though, but he is nice to look at.”

I shook my head and laughed. Well, in a world that was always changing and oftentimes overwhelming, at least I could always depend on Whit to make me feel better.

The world needed more friends like her.

I checked my reflection in the mirror for like the tenth time. I’d picked out another sundress and gotten myself done up to go talk to Hux and ask him for a repeat date. One that didn’t involve Georgette, or my dad, or talk of his past.

It was half past six, so I figured he’d be done working by now.

My heart fluttered in my chest faster than hummingbird wings. What if I walked all the way down there and he wasn’t there? What if he said no? I don’t think my heart could take a second rejection in just as many days.

You’ve got this. You’re making it a bigger deal than it is. Just go talk to him.

I blew out a breath, smoothing out the skirt of my dress.

Well, here went nothing.

It was surprisingly nice out as I made my way toward the ranch hands’ bunkhouse. It was still really sunny and warm, but there was a nice breeze that kept it from feeling too humid.

The motor of one of the Gators rumbled up behind me just as I heard a familiar voice shout out, “Hey, Queenie! Queenie!”

I held back a groan. The last thing I wanted was to talk to Dad right now. I was still raw and angry from last night, even if he hadn’t specifically done anything. But in this case, doing nothing was just as bad. At least Georgette wasn’t with him. I wondered where she was. Probably hot yoga again or something.

With a loud, outward sigh, I turned to face him. “What Dad?”

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his face full of concern.

I waved him off. “Nothing. I’m fine.”

“You sure?” His blue-gold gaze pegged me in place. Looking into his eyes was like looking into a mirror. They were the same as mine.

“Yep,” I replied with a curt nod.

Maybe he’d just leave it alone, not push for answers, but when his head cocked to the side and he quirked his eyebrow, I knew he wasn’t going to let it go.

With a sigh, I placed my hands on my hips. “I don’t like what happened last night.”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“You know, after Hux got mad and walked out, he broke things off with me and even though he’ll never admit it, I’m pretty positive it has something to do with your gem of a fiancé.”

“Queenie, I’m so sor—”

I cut him off. “Dad, what she said was absolutely fucking horrible. How are you okay with that? Like, that was mean and ignorant and completely unacceptable.”

“I know, I know.” Dad lifted his hands in a placating gesture. “She was drunk. Not that—” he said over me when I tried to cut in once more “—it makes it okay. We got into it last night and she feels awful. She plans to apologize.”

I snorted. “That’s the least she can do. Maybe she can spend a fraction of her time meant for working out trying to learn how to not be so damn ignorant and rude.”

His gaze filled with sadness. “I don’t want you to hate her.”

A little ember of guilt welled inside me. Not for her. God, no. But for my dad. I knew what it was like to have someone I cared about not like my significant other. I didn’t want him to feel that way, but I couldn’t help it. She was horrid. “I don’t hate her, Dad, but I can’t really say I like her either. She hasn’t given me much reason to.”

He hung his head, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand, and when he looked up at me, he looked so much older than normal. Weathered and beat down, like all the fight had left him. “I know. I don’t know what’s going on with her. I’ve never seen this side of her before.”

Maybe if you didn’t jump this marriage so quickly you’d have noticed and thought twice . I bit back the urge to clap back. It wouldn’t do any good.

Seeing Dad so sad and lost and beaten down hurt my heart. I wanted him to be happy, he deserved to be happy, and I hated that he was suddenly having problems with Georgette now that I’d come around. I couldn’t stop myself from pegging him with a questioning look though. I found it hard to believe that Georgette was anything other than awful.

He huffed a weak laugh. “I’m serious. I’ve never seen her act like that before. She’s usually warm and fun and lively. She’s the light of every party. She makes me laugh, a lot. Makes me feel young.”

My heart cracked a little hearing that. I sighed. “Look, I don’t have to be her best friend or even like her. In the end, it’s your relationship. If you love her, then it is what it is. But I didn’t come here to plan her wedding. I came here to plan yours. I’m not doing this if you aren’t going to be involved.”

He sucked in a breath and for a moment I thought he would try to argue. That stubborn look he got when he was being confrontational flickered in his gaze for a moment, but after expelling a breath, he nodded. “That’s fair. I wish you didn’t feel that way about her, but I can’t expect you to feel any different after the last couple days. You don’t have to plan the wedding, Quinn.”

I balked. He almost never used my name. It was one of those unspoken rules between us. As much as Queenie grated on my nerves, it was what I associated with my dad. Him calling me Quinn would be like me calling him Carl. “No, I said I would do it, so I’m going to do it.”

“But you don’t like her.”

“So, you’re my dad, and I want to help you.”

The look he gave me let me know he wasn’t convinced.

I offered what I hoped was a soft, reassuring smile and not a grimace. “I want you to have the day you deserve.”

His gaze turned glassy, and I was so taken back by the honest emotion shining on his face that tears of my own welled in my eyes.

I took a deep breath. “I also wanted to sit down and talk to you about your business proposal.”

Surprise replaced any softer emotions. “You want to work with me?”

With me. Not for me. That was a bit of a shock.

“I want to see what you can offer me and how it compares to my job back home,” I replied, keeping my tone even, professional almost. Any tiredness that lingered in his limbs vanished in that instant, excitement and exuberance taking its place, making him instantly look ten years younger. I continued on before he could say anything though. “I’m not committing to anything long-term yet, but I’d like to treat the rest of my time here before the wedding as a trial run to see if we can work together and come up with some ideas for the ranch.”

He nodded, and I knew I was losing him to his enthusiasm. He was like a kid in a candy shop. A dog with a bone. He only could focus on so many things at once. “That’s a fantastic idea! It’ll be great! We can…” he rattled on idea after idea but I wasn’t entirely listening. Not to mention, he spoke so quickly even I couldn’t keep track of what he was saying.

“Dad…Dad! Slow down.” I let out a huff of laughter. “I was thinking, though, if I’m going to stay here, I don’t want to be in the house with you and Georgette.” The thought of spending one more night under the same roof as the woman, let alone an entire month did not sit well with me.

Dad gave a quick nod. “How about you stay in one of the guest houses on the property? They’re both vacant. I’ve got the keys up at the house. Hop in and we can grab them.”

I looked down the road, toward the general direction of the bunkhouse. I mean, I guess I could go get the keys then see Hux right? As much as I wanted—no, needed to talk to Hux, I got the feeling my dad needed this moment with the two of us more.

With a huff, I met my dad’s gaze and nodded.

The wind blew my hair from the speed of the Gator as we made our way back toward the main house.

“So, this decision…” My dad said, glancing at me from the driver’s seat. “Does it have anything to do with Hux?”

I scoffed, my heart squeezing tight at the mention of him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

His lips tugged up into a knowing smirk. “That’s where you were headed, weren’t you?”

I shrugged. I was so not talking about guys with Dad. I’d hardly even been comfortable talking about them with Mom before she passed.

My dad’s grin turned wolfish. “I wasn’t lying last night when I said I liked him.”

“He’s the first guy I’ve dated that you’ve liked. How come?”

“He’s honest,” Dad replied after a moment. “And I like that he doesn’t let his circumstance keep him from living.”

“So no more of this ‘he’s got a bad attitude’ bullshit?” My stare was hard and unyielding as I remembered dad’s words from yesterday.

“No more.”

T urns out, getting the keys became a whole damn night affair. First, Dad couldn’t find them, so him and I searched his office for, like, an hour before finally, begrudgingly, I’d given in and let him involve Georgette, who was all but useless. But after another half hour of searching, we found them in Dad’s garage with a whole key ring of spares for all the buildings on the property.

After that, Georgette apologized so profusely that I thought I might claw my eyes out if I had to watch her fake cry for a minute longer. Then she’d practically demanded that I stay for dinner, which as much as I hated it, went decent and served as an opportunity to get some wedding input from my dad.

By the time I managed to get away from them though, it was nearly midnight, and the thought of taking my things and settling into one of the guesthouses was just too exhausting. A part of me was still tempted to go find Hux and talk to him, at the very least, but would he or any of the other hands appreciate me knocking on the bunkhouse door in the middle of the night when they all basically rose with the dawn?

As much as I needed to talk to him at this point, that could wait until the morning.

Tomorrow, then. I’d make things right tomorrow.