Are You Ready? (Everlasting Ink #3)

Chapter 10

CHAPTER

TEN

Briar

When I told Forrest he could text and call me, I didn’t think it would be something he’d do every single day. That was Wednesday. It’s now Saturday morning and I’m staring at the same text I’ve woken up to the last three days.

Forrest: Morning, beautiful.

In the sanctuary of my bedroom, I don’t hide my smile at seeing his message. Forrest is unlike anyone I’ve ever met. He’s kind, funny, and direct. He doesn’t hide away from discussing how he’s feeling. My heart flutters when I think about him. That’s been a lot lately, more so since dinner at his place earlier this week.

I desperately want to trust in him and his intentions. I know there are smooth-talking men. I fell for one once, and it ended in pain and a night that changed the course of my life.

Me: Good morning.

The pitter-patter of feet on the hardwood floor has me throwing off the covers and climbing out of bed. The girls will need breakfast, and then we need to go grocery shopping. We’re all getting together tonight at Emerson’s house for girls’ night. The kids will be there. Emerson wanted the twins to come and have a play date with Lilly, and all the other ladies are coming so we can have a “big girls’ and little girls’” day. Those are Emerson’s words, not mine.

I’m a little worried about hanging out with all of them tonight. I don’t know what Forrest has told them—if anything—and he’s going to be right next door. I’m out of my element here. Not only that, but here’s this man who is older than me and has his life together. He says he’s interested, but I have two little girls to think about. I can’t just dive headfirst into whatever this is and hope for the best.

Forrest says he knows there are four hearts involved, and I’ll admit that was sweet. His words relaxed me and endeared me to him even more, but they’re words. I know words can be empty. It’s actions and time that speak volumes. Time to make sure it’s not an act. Time to get to know him and for him to know me. There is still so much he doesn’t know, and there is this huge fear that when he finds out, he’ll change his mind.

“Mommy!” the girls sing when I reach the living room. They’re sitting on the couch with their blankets and Rayne has the remote in her hand. At four, they are smarter than most adults. The TV is on and their favorite cartoon is playing.

“Good morning.” I smile as I take a seat next to them on the couch. “What do you want for breakfast?”

“Pancakes.” Their reply is instant.

“Pancakes it is.” I kiss their cheeks and then head toward the kitchen to make breakfast.

“Mommy, can we hold the baby?” Rayne asks.

My eyes find Emerson’s and she nods. “Sure, but you have to sit on the couch.” The girls scramble to the couch, sit side by side, and pat their laps.

“Who’s first?” Emerson asks.

“We can hold her together,” River tells her.

“Right. I should have thought of that.” Emerson smiles. She places Lilly in their laps and bends to make sure she doesn’t fall .

“Hi, Lilly,” River says.

“We’re your friends,” Rayne says.

“My heart,” Monroe says. “How in the he—heck do you stand the cuteness?” she asks me.

“We used to be the cuteness.” Brogan chuckles. “I guess we’re just used to it.”

“Mommy, we want a baby,” River tells me.

“Oh, you do, do you?” I ask, smiling at my daughters.

“Yep,” they answer proudly.

“Monroe is going to have a baby. Then you’ll have one for each of you,” I tell them. I’m not ashamed that I’m directing their interest from me to Monroe.

“Another baby?” Their eyes are wide.

“I’m going to need your help. You girls are so good with Lilly. I’ll need help with this baby too,” Monroe tells them.

“We’re good helpers,” Rayne tells her.

“Real good,” River adds.

We’re all laughing when the front door opens.

“Was there a party I wasn’t invited to?” a male voice asks. It’s a voice I recognize all too well, one that I hear in my sleep these days.

“Forty!” the girls cheer.

Forrest walks into the room, and his eyes immediately find mine. He doesn’t stop until he’s standing in front of the couch. He crouches down and smiles at my girls. “Razzle, Dazzle, I didn’t know you were going to be here.”

“We’re having girls' night,” River explains.

“And we’re helping with the baby,” Rayne adds.

“I can see that.” He smiles at them as he offers Lilly his finger, which she holds onto and turns his smile on me. “Hey, Momma.”

“Hi.”

Emerson lifts Lilly from the twins’ laps and stands. “I thought you were at the shop with Rome tonight?” Emerson asks.

“I was. I finished the piece I was working on. We just had some shading to wrap it up. Rome is almost finished, and he’ll be on his way home. ”

“Well, y’all need to go to your place,” Emerson tells him.

“Or mine,” Monroe offers. “Legend is there.”

“I actually came to take Lilly to my place,” he tells his sister.

“Lills, you want to go hang out with Uncle Forrest?” she asks her daughter. Forrest stands and reaches for Lilly. She leans into him as he pulls her into his arms.

“Of course she does,” Forrest answers, placing a kiss to her cheek. Lilly rests her head on his shoulder, and he snuggles her close.

“Mommy, we want to go with Forty too,” Rayne says.

“Can we, Mommy? Please?” Rayne asks.

They’re bouncing on the balls of their feet, anxious for my answer. “Girls—” I start, but Forrest interrupts me.

“If your mommy says it’s okay, it’s fine with me,” Forrest tells them. All three turn to look at me.

“Three is a lot to handle,” I tell him.

“Pfft, we’ve got this. Razzle and Dazzle will be my big helpers with Lilly bug.”

“Yeah, we’re helpers,” the girls announce proudly.

“Girls, Forrest has worked all day. He needs to rest.”

“Mommy, he said we could. Right, Forrest?” River asks.

“You girls are always welcome, but we have to listen to your mom.”

“Please?” Their lips jut out and I know tears are about to flow.

“Girls, let’s go get a snack,” Brogan suggests.

“We don’t want a snack,” Rayne says.

Forrest nods for me to follow him into the hallway. I stand, aware that all eyes are on us. He hands Lilly off to Emerson, and with his hand on the small of my back, leads me away from all the eyes and ears.

In the hallway, he moves us so that I’m standing with my back against the wall, and steps in close. “Hi.” His voice is husky.

“Hi.”

He tucks my hair behind my ear. “Tell me what you’re thinking? ”

How am I supposed to think with him this close to me? Touching me? I take a deep breath and gather my thoughts. “I’m thinking you don’t want to spend the rest of your Saturday night watching my daughters.”

“You’d think wrong. I’d love for them to come and help me with Lilly. You and your girls are welcome at my place anytime, Briar.”

“How old are you?” I blurt.

“I’m thirty-two.”

“I’m a twenty-two-year-old single mom.” He’s ten years older than me. Surely, he wants his own family, not a ready-made one. I can hear Brogan’s voice in my head telling me I have to stop looking for and thinking the worst of everyone because of my past. I need to keep looking forward.

“You’re a twenty-two-year-old beautiful, single mom with two adorable daughters who I happen to adore as much as I do their mother.”

“Sweet words.”

“I promise you they will be safe with me, Briar. I’d never let anything happen to them.” His gaze is penetrating as he wills me to believe him.

“Trust is hard for me.”

“I know. Baby steps. I’ll be right next door. You can come and check on them or text me anytime you want. Let me take them with Lilly, and you ladies can have some adult time. Ask them about me. Sure, it’s my sister and her best friend, but they won’t bullshit you.”

“I would never do that to you.”

“I know, which is why I’m telling you to.”

“I don’t know if I’m ready for this.”

“For what? Me watching the girls?”

“ You , Forrest. I don’t know if I’m ready for you. For this… invisible string that seems to keep me tethered to you even when you’re not around. I just don’t know.”

“I’m not rushing you. You know where I stand. Regardless, I made a promise that I would always be there for the girls, and this will give you a small breather. Every parent needs a break now and then.”

I process his words. I’m being unreasonable, but I don’t know how to get past it. I want more than anything to not fear every man’s intentions, but I’m scarred. Damaged goods, if you will.

“Come here.” He stands back to his full height and tugs me into his arms, and I go willingly. He embraces me so tightly, it’s hard to understand why I’m pushing back with him. “You can trust me, Briar. I’ll prove it to you.”

“Okay.” The words slip from my lips, and I know I need to take this step. I want this with him. I want to be free to have relationships, and being in his arms, it feels right. I’ve never been hugged like this by anyone other than Brogan and our dad, and Forrest. He gives the best hugs.

“Yeah?” He releases his hold on me, but not completely, as he keeps an arm around my waist.

“Yes. Don’t complain when I send you a million texts.”

“No complaints here.” He bends his head and kisses my lips softly. “Thank you. Come on. Let’s go tell the girls.” He reaches for my hand, but I pull away.

“One day you’ll let me show the world you’re my choice,” he whispers before walking ahead of me into the living room. “Razzle, Dazzle, Lilly, it’s time to party.”

The twins cheer.

By the time I join them, he already has Lilly back in his arms, who is content to rest her head against his shoulder. The girls are holding hands, with River’s hand in his. “Come, give me a hug,” I tell the twins. They look reluctant to let go of Forrest—worried that I might change my mind.

“Go tell your mom goodbye before we go,” he urges them. They walk toward me, and I crouch down and open my arms for them.

“Love you. Please be good for Forrest.”

“We’ll be so good,” Rayne tells me.

“And help with Lilly,” River adds .

“Okay. I’ll be over to get you in a little while.” With a hug and a kiss from each, they race back to Forrest's side, taking the same formation, holding hands, and River’s hand in his.

“Take care of my babies,” I tell him.

“Always, Momma.” He winks and leads the girls out of the house with Lilly on his hip.

I watch them leave before turning back to the room. I find four pairs of eyes watching me intently.

“Damn.” Maggie waves her hand in front of her face. “Was it just me or were there some major sparks flying?”

“He’s like my brother, but even I’m a little turned on with how he called you momma with the wink,” Monroe says.

“You’ve been holding out on me,” Brogan says, crossing her arms over her chest.

“My brother wants you,” Emerson adds.

“He’s just being nice.”

“Is that why your face is all flushed?” Maggie teases.

My answer is to cover my face with my hands. “I don’t know,” I confess.

“He’s a good guy,” Monroe offers. “They all are. They’re sexy, tattooed teddy bears.”

“Don’t let your husband hear you say that,” Emerson teases her.

Monroe waves her off. “I’d say the same thing to him.”

Emerson sits on the couch and pats the cushion next to her. “Come sit.”

I want to run and hide, but I know that’s not an option, so I take the cushion next to her. “He’s my brother, but you’re my friend. This is a safe place, Briar. You can tell us, and there will be no judgment, and nothing will get back to the guys. Especially Forrest.”

“He says he wants to date me,” I blurt, feeling my face heat even more. I’m sure I’m as red as a tomato. I’m a twenty-two-year-old single mom who has no dating experience. I’m acting like a teenager.

Emerson nods. “Then he means it. ”

“I’m… a mess, Emerson. I have no dating experience past a few dates in high school. I’m a single mom of twins. What could he possibly see?”

“He sees a beautiful woman with adorable daughters,” Maggie says.

“Briar, Forrest isn’t the kind of man to take advantage of a situation.” Monroe eyes me carefully. “He’s a man of his word. I’ve known him my entire life. He’s one of my husband’s best friends and my best friend’s older brother. He’s one of the good ones.”

“It’s just hard for me to trust,” I tell them.

“Briar.” Brogan says my name, and I feel a lecture coming on. I turn to face her, knowing I can’t avoid my twin. “He’s been to the house. He let the girls put his hair in bows and paint his nails. He invited you and the twins and even extended the invitation to me to his house for dinner. He just offered to take your daughters for a couple of hours so you could get a break. Let all of that sink in, sister. How many times has he tried to sleep with you with the interactions the two of you have had?”

“None. Well, I mean, he hugged me, and he’s kissed me. Just quick… a couple of times.”

“Aw, my big brother has a crush,” Emerson coos.

“I don’t know that I’m ready for casual or serious. I have to think about the girls,” I tell my friends and my sister.

“Forrest has the patience of a saint.” Monroe laughs. “He put up with us when we were younger.” She points to Emerson. “He was nineteen when he moved out. We were nine. I can still remember when he came to my house and sat down with my parents. He told them that he was Emerson’s big brother, and….” Her voice trails off.

“Our parents suck.” Emerson picks up where Monroe left off. “Forrest moved out and would get me as much as my parents allowed. The minute I turned eighteen, he moved me in with him. Before that, he would let me spend the weekends and breaks from school with him; sometimes, even during school. It’s not like my parents cared. If his schedule allowed, I was with him. He went to Monroe’s parents and told them all of that. He told them that Monroe was my best friend, and he’d very much like for them to allow Monroe to come and stay with me sometimes when I was with him. At nineteen, he had more maturity than our mom and dad put together.”

“What we’re trying to tell you is that it’s not an act. It’s who he is,” Monroe jumps back in.

“I’m scared,” I admit.

Brogan takes the seat next to me and wraps me in a hug. “We can’t let the past define us, Briar. You light up when he’s around, and so do the girls. Take this at your pace. But promise me you’ll keep an open mind. Let him show you.”

I nod. “Fine, can we move the heat off me? What about you?” I ask my sister. “Your dating history matches mine.” I give her a pointed look. Our stories differ, yet they’re similar. She’s been there with me every step of the way since that night, and I know calling her out is a shitty thing to do.

“If and when there is a man that comes into my life who proves he’s worth my time, I’ll hold on to him with all I’ve got,” Brogan announces. She didn’t hesitate with her reply.

“And you?” Monroe asks Maggie.

“What they said.” She grins. “It’s so damn hard to find the good ones. Emerson and Monroe, well, and now, Briar.” She wags her eyebrows. “You’re the lucky ones to have found good men.”

She’s calling Forrest mine, and I don’t know what to do with that. What would that look like? Being his. Him being mine. It’s a dream to find a man to love all three of us. Sure, I’m scared and trusting is hard for me, but I’m still me, and finding the love of a man who will love me and my daughters with all he’s got, even I can dream about that.

Thankfully, the conversation changes to Monroe’s baby shower, which somehow leads to Brogan telling them that our birthday is next weekend.

“We have to celebrate,” Monroe tells us.

“My place or yours?” Emerson asks her.

“We’ll figure it out and let you all know. Bring a side dish. We’ll handle the meat and the birthday cake,” Monroe replies .

“What?” I laugh. “No, you don’t have to do this.”

“We want to. That’s what friends are for.” Maggie shrugs.

I part my lips to argue, and Emerson shakes her head. “Nope. It’s happening. We celebrate all the small things to all the large things. Birthdays are a part of that. Next Saturday night, you four better be there. Monroe and I will get all the details worked out and let everyone know the time and location.”

Brogan lifts her lips, pulling up into a grin.

“Thank you,” I concede.

The rest of the night, we talk and laugh and enjoy each other's company. I only text Forrest a few times, and each time he sends a picture back of the girls. They’re having the time of their lives, and it makes me happy to know he’s doing that for them.

“I better go get the girls.”

“I’ll walk with you to get Lilly,” Emerson tells me. “Roman is over there with them.”

“You should have told us. We’ve overstayed our welcome.”

“No, you most certainly did not. He’s got our little girl, his best friend, and your girls to keep him company. He’s fine. He knew I was having girls’ night here tonight.”

I follow her out the front door as she leads the way to Forrest’s house next door. She doesn’t knock as she pushes open the door and steps inside. The house is quiet, and I start to worry until I bump into Emerson, where she’s standing just outside of the living room. Moving to stand beside her, my heart melts at the sight before me.

Roman is asleep in the chair with Lilly on his chest. Forrest is on the couch with a twin on either side. He has his arms wrapped around them, holding them close, as if he’s afraid to let them go.

“Oh my God,” I whisper.

Emerson reaches over and grabs my hand. “This. This is why you trust him,” she murmurs. “He’ll love them with all he has. He’ll love you with that same intensity.”

“It’s a little soon to talk about love,” I mumble.

“Just let it happen, Briar. I don’t know what’s in your past—and if you ever want to tell me, I’m here for you—but I can tell you it doesn’t matter. Trust me. Forrest and I are the last people to judge someone for their past or where they came from.” With that, she drops my hand and steps into the room. She moves to Roman and runs her hands through his hair. His eyes pop open, but they soften when they land on his wife.

“Baby girl,” he rumbles as he slides his palm behind her neck and kisses her.

I move to the couch and sit next to River, who is sitting to the left of Forrest. The urge to take a picture to remember this moment is strong, but I hold back.

“We’ll see you at ours. You need help carrying them over?” Emerson asks.

“No. I’ll be fine.”

“You sure?” Roman asks.

“I got it,” a deep, gruff voice replies.

I whip my head around to see Forrest’s eyes on me.

“Hey, Momma.” He smiles. After lifting his hand, he palms my cheek. “How was your night?”

“Good. Yours?”

“Perfect. This house is too big, too empty. It was nice to have it full again.”

“Thank you for watching them.”

“Thank you for letting me.” He manages to stand and not wake the girls. He lifts his index finger to his lips, telling me to be quiet as he does. Once he’s on his feet and it’s obvious the girls are not going to wake up, he offers me his hand and I take it, allowing him to help me stand. I follow him to the kitchen.

“What are we—” I’m cut off when Forrest spins, grips my hips, and lifts me to sit on the kitchen island.

His hands cradle my cheeks, and he moves in close. My legs open for him without question, allowing him to be close. So close I’m not sure where he ends and I begin. “If you don’t want me to kiss you, tell me now.”

I do. I do want him to kiss me. But— “I might be bad at it.”

Forrest shakes his head. “Impossible. ”

“The last time I was kissed, really kissed, I was eighteen, and I didn’t exactly have a lot of experience.”

“Good.”

“Good?”

“I get to show you. I get to be the one to make you realize that you’re not bad at it. Just me. You’re only going to be kissing me.”

“Just you, huh?” I ask. I try to hide my smile, but it’s no use.

“Are you ready?” he asks.

I hesitate, then nod. My hands are shaking, and I’m glad I’m sitting because I’m sure my knees would have buckled by now.

Forrest leans in and presses his lips to mine. He slides his large, calloused hand behind the base of my neck and holds me close. His other hand wraps around me and pulls me into his chest. I feel his hard length and I gasp. He takes that as his opening to slide his tongue past my lips. I don’t know what I’m doing, but I meet him stroke for stroke, hoping I’m not making a fool of myself. He’s got years of experience on me, and me, well, I’ve got a few fumbling events that led up to that night.

Shaking out of my thoughts, I can’t think about that. Not right now. This is my moment. My time with him. And even though I don’t know if this is going to be more than this, I’m savoring every second.

When he pulls away, we’re both breathing heavily. He rests his forehead against mine. “I don’t want you to go.”

“I need to get the girls home and in bed. Brogan is next door.”

“Fine. Let’s get the girls in the car.” He gives me one more peck on the lips before lifting me from the counter and leading me to the living room.

The girls are sound asleep. He takes Rayne and I take River, and we walk them to my car and get them strapped in. “I need to go get Brogan and say goodbye to the girls.”

“I’ll wait here with them.” He snags an arm around my waist and kisses me again before I force myself to pull away and make my way back into the house.

“Thank you for having us,” I tell Emerson. “Forrest is at the car with the girls, so we need to go. ”

“This was fun,” Brogan says, standing and hugging Maggie, Monroe, and Emerson. I do the same, and with a final wave, we’re out the door.

“Brogan, good to see you.”

“You, too, Forrest.” My sister climbs into the passenger seat and shuts the door.

“Call me when you get home.”

“It’s late.”

“Fine. At least text me and let me know you made it home, okay.”

“I can do that.”

“Thank you. Night, beautiful.”

“Night, Forrest.”

One more kiss and I’m climbing behind the wheel and pulling out of the driveway.

Brogan reaches over and places her hand on my arm. “Baby steps, sister, but I have a good feeling about that man.”

“Yeah,” I tell her. All my fears aside, I do too. I just hope neither of us are wrong.