Auctioned to the Prisoners (Auctioned #4)

12

HYDE

BLOODY HANDS

“I can’t do this,” I tell Rock as I rinse the bowl in my hand.

“We have to share the chores, man, or this place will stink.”

“I don’t mean the stupid dishes.”

I dump the bowl on the drainboard and rinse my hands under the stream of warm water.

Kinkaid just fucked Lory, and soon it’ll be my turn, and I don’t fucking trust myself. Rock and Kinkaid don’t trust me, either. They wanted to hold me down last night. Only Lory’s objection made them leave, but it proved to me they didn’t believe it was worth the risk to leave me alone with her.

Maybe they’re right. Maybe last night was just a fluke. I controlled myself with her tender hands on me and her soft voice whispering in my ear. She dialed back all the buzzing in my head, and I could lay still and quiet against her body. I slept deeper than I have in years, waking with my face between her warm breasts and her hand in my hair.

“You mean with Lory?”

I lean against the counter and run my wet hands through my hair. It flops over my forehead and eyes, the curls slick and separated. “Yeah. One of you should be there.”

“You think Lory would be okay with that?”

“She wasn’t last night,” I admit, although I think that was more about her concerns over my mental health than her inhibitions.

“Maybe you should try something different.” Rock unfastens the tie that holds his hair, giving it a shake, and then combs it back to refasten it. I’ve noticed it’s something he does when he needs time to think.

“What kind of different ?”

“I just mean, maybe you should just fool around with her in front of the TV. Me and Kinkaid will play cards or something. You get her in your lap and…” He waves his hand to fill the blanks. “We’ll be nearby, but it won’t be like we’re observing.”

“Yeah. That could work.”

I stuff my hands in my pockets, trying to stop my fingers from twitching out a beat on the counter. I blink a few times, fast, as my nervous system fires out of control. I need something to do to burn off energy.

“I’m going to work out.”

I pass Rock on the way out of the kitchenette, then drop to the floor for twenty push-ups. After completing those, I roll over and begin my sit-up regime, pulling my abs towards my spine for maximum effect. I count the numbers, which gives me focus. I repeat the process twice, and I’m sweating by the time Kinkaid opens the door and strolls out.

He doesn’t smile often. He’ll laugh if a joke is really funny, but I’ve never seen him with more than a fleeting grin on his face until now. There’s a floppiness to him that freaks me the fuck out like his muscles have relaxed and turned to jelly. He fucked Lory, and now he looks like a different man.

I felt like a different man this morning, but as soon as she slid out of my arms and I looked around the bleak room we slept in, all that peace shriveled into a sharp ball in my chest. I pretended it didn’t. I tried hard to keep my outward mood light, but inside, all my doubts crept back like evening shadows in a dumpster-filled alleyway.

Lory follows, dressed again in her borrowed clothes. Her cheeks are flushed pink, and her dark eyes have a twinkle that floods me with fury. She likes Kinkaid. She enjoyed fucking him. She likes him better than me.

Jealousy roars in my veins, and I scramble to my feet, plummeting into the inky dark part of my soul that yawns to consume me. Kinkaid’s expression falls as soon as he senses the change in me, putting himself between me and Lory.

“Hyde,” he warns.

“She’s not yours, Kinkaid,” I growl, spinning from of a place that makes sense. “You’re acting like she’s yours.”

“That’s not what I’m doing.” He holds out his hands and keeps his voice even, but even with his attempts to pacify me, my fists still shake at my sides.

I try to get around him, but my brain is fogged, and my body jerks out of control. “You give me my turn, Kinkaid. I handled Whitaker as much as you did. I deserve my turn.”

Lory gasps, and I’m close enough to grab her arm, but Kinkaid uses his bulk as a barrier. His blue eyes flash with a warning, and I sense Rock closing in behind me.

“We talked about this, Hyde,” Rock rumbles. “Why’re you changing what we decided?”

“Because FUCK ALL OF THIS. Fuck waiting around for Kinkaid to get his dick wet. Fuck this place, sucking me dry. Fuck Grady for wanting us to take the revenge he didn’t have balls to take himself.” I grip my hair, pulling it hard enough to hurt. “FUCK EVERYTHING.”

“Hyde.” Lory’s voice is so soft, it’s shocking in the aftermath of my rage. She peers around Kinkaid, and her eyes are soft. “I don’t belong to anyone. I’m just here for a while to have fun with you guys. Do you want to have some fun with me?”

“No fucking way,” Kinkaid says.

“Kinkaid,” Rock warns. “You’re only going to make this worse.”

“Yeah, Kinkaid.” I step forward quickly, reaching for Lory’s wrist and pulling her into my arms. She gasps as her face hits my chest, and I wrap her in a tight embrace. He’s not going to take what’s mine. Not now. Not ever.

“Hyde, fuck.” Kinkaid’s eyes are wide now, and I’m lost to the darkness, blinking too fast, the urge to pace making my whole body shake.

“Hyde.” Lory’s voice is soothing, but her body is tight. She must be scared. I’m a huge criminal who’s spinning out in front of her. She touches my arm, and everything goes still. “If you want me, you can have me. That’s what I’m here for.”

“I’ll hurt you,” I admit. “I’ll hurt you so bad.”

“No, you won’t,” she says. The tremble in her voice tells me she’s lying, or at least, she’s not as sure as she’s pretending she is. “You’ll make me feel good like you did last night.”

“I won’t be able to hold back.”

“Maybe you don’t need to.”

Her words coil the vibrating darkness in my chest into a ball that weighs like lead beneath my lungs. This girl is dangerous. She’s dangerous because she’s trying to get inside our heads with her softness and easy ways. She wants to make us weak.

Or maybe she’s just trying to stay alive.

I back away from Kinkaid, and Rock skirts around us with his hands spread. Lory’s still clutched tightly against me, and neither of my friends want to risk setting me off.

I don’t take her into the room that she just fucked Kinkaid in. I don’t want to be filled with the scent of their sex. He’s already marked her, but I can wipe all that away.

I slam the door to the other room and Lory flinches. A stabbing sensation makes me gasp a guilty breath.

Stroking her cheek, I lean down until we’re eye to eye. “I’m trying really hard,” I whisper.

“I know you are.” She blinks her wide eyes and covers the scorpion on my cheek with her hand. I want to close my eyes and let her hold me like she did last night. When we’re close like that, the years fall away, and I’m just James, the person I was before the world fucked me up and made me a monster.

But I can’t because the dick between my legs is a snake poised to strike. The darkness in me wants to use Lory’s body without tenderness or any kind of goodness. It wants to swallow her whole.

“Hyde.” Kinkaid’s outside the door. “Let Lory come out, okay? Let her come out here, and I won’t call the warden. If you hurt her, this whole thing will be over. He’ll take her home, and we’ll have to go back to hell.”

She looks at me with her wide eyes that aren’t judgmental but should be. I can’t stand to be looked at when I’m like this, with all my frayed edges and badness leaking out of me like an oil slick across a perfect ocean. I turn her and force her over the bed until she’s bent at the waist and face down.

Her leggings are stretchy, and I get them over her hips quickly. Her ass is as beautiful as the moon in a fucking desolate prison sky; the soft pink space between her legs is all I care about right now. I pull out my cock as I spread her open and slick my finger over her clit. She bucks, still sensitive from Kinkaid. The thought is pure white-hot rage.

“This is mine.” I push a finger into her, then another. She’s not as tight as last night, so maybe she’ll take me after all.

She tries to spread her legs when I force in a third finger, but her leggings keep her thighs pressed tight.

With my free hand, I jack my cock hard until it’s leaking pre-cum, then I use the fingers I had inside her to coat it with her juices. The smell of her pussy sends me spinning hard and fast. My cock is halfway inside her before I realize what I’m doing.

Taking.

Forcing.

My hands tremble on her hips, and I freeze.

Lory’s hand rests over mine, and she twists to look at me. I close my eyes as the darkness behind my lids gulps me down. Fuck. This isn’t the man I want to be, repeating the fucked-up things that happened to me in my life, hurting someone else the way they hurt me.

I grab my hair and step back, slipping from inside her. I close my eyes against what I’ve done.

“Hyde.” Lory’s hands grip my face, and my cheeks are wet, but I don’t know why. “Hyde.”

I don’t want her to call me that, but she doesn’t know better. In this fucking underworld, it’s all anyone knows me as. She wraps her arms around my waist, and I hold onto my hair because if I let go, my hands will hurt her again. She holds me tightly, pressing her face into my neck, breathing softly against my skin. “It’s okay,” she whispers. “It’s okay. You don’t have to take what I’m willing to give.”

My throat burns because no one has touched me so softly or held me with so much tenderness before. Even when I was a kid, any kindness came with a backhand of cruelty.

“Let me give it to you.” She takes my hand in hers, slowly prizing my fingers away. I open my eyes, finding them swimming and blurry. Am I fucking crying? Jesus. I’m losing it.

When she slides my hand up her ribs and over her breast, I know I’m losing it. She’s letting me touch her after what I did. I don’t deserve this. She should slap me across the face, punch me, kick me. She should call me all the bad names under the sun because I’d deserve them. All of them.

I could recite them to her because they’re etched into my brain.

Piece of shit, fucking brat, dirty little punk, crybaby, sissy.

I fight the voices, but they slice into me anyway.

She eases her leggings down and encourages me to follow her to the bed. “We need a condom,” she says matter-of-factly like this is just work to her. I guess it is because she’s getting paid, working off the warden’s debt by taking my cock. Doesn’t seem fair to her.

“Kinkaid, I need a condom,” I yell, knowing full well it’ll piss him off but also that he’ll be grateful for the excuse to check on Lory. She’s on her back with her legs spread, staring up at me as I rub the back of my head.

Behind me, the door opens, and Kinkaid’s feet thump against the floor.

He hands me the packet, looking down at Lory, who doesn’t cover herself. I guess he’s seen it all already.

“You okay?” he asks her.

“I’m good.” She looks at me when she speaks, and her reassurance settles in my bones.

“We’re just outside.” Kinkaid shoots me a warning look, but he leaves, closing the door behind him.

With fumbling hands, I sheath my dick, forgetting the tight grip of the condom and the way it deadens the sensation of my own hand.

“You’re good, huh?”

I brush Lory’s clit with the pad of my index finger, fascinated as her pussy flutters from such a simple touch. Another day, when I’m less jacked up for this, I’m going to edge the fuck out of her, make her whimper and beg for release. I reckon she could take it. I reckon she’d like it, too.

“Yeah,” she replies as I get close enough to press my dick just an inch inside. She arches her back and closes her eyes, and when I push deeper, she makes a low groan that sounds a lot like pleasure. Is she really enjoying this or just playing along to keep me sweet?

I don’t like being lied to. I don’t like being made to feel like an idiot.

I shove in deeper, and her eyes meet mine. They’re not fearful but heavy-lidded. She’s wet and panting as I thrust into her. She’s not faking; this is real.

“Fuck, Sunshine,” I grind out as I move in long slick deep strokes that make me feel like a god. I take her legs and rest them over my shoulders, folding her for deeper penetration. My mouth crashes into hers, and she takes my tongue, licking into my mouth in a way that draws my balls tight. Her hands grip my hair, angling my head, hungry for the ferocity I can’t contain.

Does she realize that being inside her is unraveling me? Can she sense my loss of control?

I close my eyes, trying to maintain a rhythm, holding off until her orgasm pulses around me. Then I look. She’s beautiful when she comes, like an angel seeing heaven for the first time.

She’s everything that was never meant for me.

My hands are bloody. My body is dirty. I’m a broken pot, glued back together, out of place, with pieces missing.

The rising tide of my release is swift. It’s a punch to the gut, curling my body inwards. My soul is ragged, my mind shattered, and I hold on to Lory like a life raft.

“It’s okay,” she soothes. “It’s okay.”

Her hands on me are like water, but nothing can wash away my scars and my sins, no matter how much I wish they could.

Nothing.