Autumn After (Waiting Hearts World)

2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Cedric

I love my family. I do. I love spending time with them. I love going places with them. I love how they gave me my space when I needed it. They were the perfect family for me. Any wolf my age would be lucky to have the accepting parents and grandparents that I had. Except lately, being around them was getting kind of weird—and not because of anything they did, but because of my wolf.

He was feeling antsy.

Fine, antsy was an understatement. He growled within me with a ferocity that rivaled a cornered raccoon. Feral was the word that more accurately described his state. I wasn’t sure what to do about it, even if I did have a pretty good guess as to why

My beast was keenly aware of everyone around us getting mated, and he longed for that too.

It started after attending my younger brother’s mating ceremony at the full moon celebration in July. He—an alpha like me—stood next to the Alpha of our pack and accepted an omega we’d known our whole lives as his life mate. And he was happy. So gloriously happy. I was happy for him! My wolf on the other hand… was jealous.

It wasn’t like I didn’t also want a mate. Of course, I wanted to settle down, find a nice omega, grow a family, live happily ever after. Heck, I could even be convinced to get a white picket fence. But that wasn’t in the cards for me, which was something my parents didn’t understand.

They saw that more than once, one of the pack members approached me about potentially mating—almost as if it was a business transaction. In their mind I was just being picky, and at my age I couldn’t afford to do that. And maybe I wasn’t a pup anymore, but that didn’t change things. I didn’t want my mating to be a business transaction. I wanted it to be a love match. One arranged by fate, not by paperwork.

My parents were right, I was getting older. And yes, waiting for a love match might not work out for me, but I also saw the downfall of more than one alpha who got mated, not by fate but by personal selection, only to have one or the other find their true mate years in. What a mess that was, with the only ending including a boatload of heartache.

The person who finds their true mate felt horrible for leaving their mate, and the person who’s left—while they understand in their head what happened—in their heart, it hurts. And then, if there are children, that was a whole other thing. No, thank you. I was going to take a hard pass on that one.

So it was best to wait. Even if waiting meant being alone.

Sadly, my father didn’t agree, and instead of just telling me about it, he waited until we were out hunting to shift and tell me to shift too.

“We need to talk, Son,” he said. “When an alpha becomes a certain age...”

Dear Goddess, I already knew what he was going to say before he did. But I tried not to be rude.

“I know, Dad.”

“Listen, your wolf...he is on edge. We can feel it. Everyone can feel it. I know your younger brother taking a mate before you was unorthodox, but he couldn’t wait forever for you to make a move on an eligible omega.”

That caught my attention because I thought it was only me who was feeling my wolf’s unease. Was it projecting out? Was that why my brother had missed the last few family dinners? I assumed he and his mate had holed up in their new home, but perhaps I had inadvertently pushed him away. Maybe I was looking at all this wrong.

“Okay, I’ll work on that.” Meditation was an option. Perhaps a yoga session or two.

I could also talk to my brother.

“You can work on it all you want, but it’s because he needs to settle down. He’s longing for pups of his own. Once you see your brother with his pup, it will hit you even harder.”

Wait. Sid was expecting?

I bit back a growl. My wolf wanted to snap. “Well, it’s not like I can go to the corner store and buy one.” I flinched, knowing I’d way overstepped my bounds. Instead, my father started to laugh.

“Okay, but if your wolf gets too far out of hand, you’re going to have to do something, right? It will only get worse unless you address it now.”

And by address it, he meant get mated. Like it was that easy. The alternative would be to come to terms with the single life. “Yeah, I know, Dad. Can we go finish tracking down that deer we just scented? I was more in the mood for fox.”

“I’m serious, Cedric.” He put a hand on my shoulder. “If you feel you need to search for a mate outside the pack, we understand. There are other packs you can visit. We will support you.”

I appreciated that. So much. Only, my wolf didn’t want to leave this pack, not for any reason, even if we would come back once we found our mate. I was rooted here, and this was where we were staying. It wasn’t like I could use logic on the animal—he was illogical.

“I know that. And I am taking it seriously. I promise.”

He nodded.

I felt I should say more, but we both shifted and began our hunt.

Talking through my feelings with my family wasn’t exactly easy. As the oldest in the family, I felt that I needed to remain strong. Sid was the one who could better communicate with our parents and others. Perhaps that was why he was able to find an omega first. Meanwhile, I was alone.

Our hunt lasted a while, I was too distracted with my melancholy thoughts to accomplish much. In the end, we wound up with neither fox nor deer. Instead, a couple of rabbits crossed our paths and were too good to pass up. But we didn’t have time to keep going out, because the pack was starting to get ready for our harvest festival, or as we called it, the Autumn’s Howl Festival.

We arrived back at my home which was on the outskirts of the pack territory, where we hung our catch up. Sid would come later and do the dirty work.

The whole territory was drenched in golden and red leaves as the seasons shifted from summer to fall.

“Are you helping gather pumpkins for the festival?” my dad asked.

I shook my head. “I wish, but I promised Jenks I’d go into town to pick up the supplies he ordered. Janet has some grand plan for a harvest project for the kids. Something that will keep them occupied once the adults start hitting the hard cider.”

He chuckled. “I’m glad you’re helping out. Give a shout to your mom and me when you get back. There’s a storm coming in. I can feel it in my bones.”

The festival was originally an event that celebrated the Harvest Moon, but it had become so much more than that. It had become a massive pack social event, and it mimicked those that the humans had. We’d carve pumpkins, we had apple pies—including a lucrative pie contest, we made fancy candies. We decorated with leaves and pretty corn, and even had a scarecrow contest. Only, instead of crows being in human form, they were all in wolf form. It was a good time to be had by all.

Each year we added new and different events to keep the festival fresh. This year, in order to distract myself from my pathetic single life, I had joined the committee. Boy, did I learn a lot about how much work it took to make the event what it was.

Being one of the unmated ones, you got to shoulder a lot of that work. It was time to get to it. We only had limited days to prepare. As the event got closer, the to-do list seemed to grow longer and despite my best efforts, it seemed like we were adding more events and activities each day.

Yesterday Janet asked if we could have a petting zoo! Never mind the fact that we couldn’t get one scheduled in time, but we were wolves. Bringing prey animals into the area would be a recipe for disaster. In the end, she agreed that logistically it wouldn’t work out, and instead, we opted to have a photograph gallery. Which was another item on my list—make a space where the photos could be put up.

I ran a hand through my hair and went to my truck. The to-do list wasn’t going to get itself done.