Beast, Part Two (The Church #5)

Wake Up

chapter four

Summer

T he slow beeping sound is driving me crazy. I first noticed it in the dream I was having. It was low at the time, but the more the dream started to fade the louder the noise grew.

Slowly, I open my eyes hoping to find the noise and turn it off. The moment my eyes open, I immediately close them again. The lights are extremely bright. I groan as I try to lift my arm to shield my eyes.

“Whoa. Take it easy,” a deep male voice says.

However, the voice isn’t foreign to me. I’ve heard that voice a lot lately. It’s in those brief moments when I’m lucid, it’s even in my sleep talking to me.

Opening my eyes, I turn my head toward the sound. It takes a moment for my sight to adjust. My breath catches in my throat when I take in the man sitting beside me.

I recognized him from that day in my school parking lot. He’s the guy that appeared when that asshole refused to move for me. He’s attractive with his square jaw, broad nose, and dark hair. But it’s the eyes that have me gasping. I never saw his eyes the day in the parking lot.

“Your eyes?”

He smiles. “I’m Maksim. I’m Beast’s brother.”

“That explains the parking lot,” I croak out.

He chuckles. I attempt to sit up and immediately cry out when sharp pain goes through my shoulder.

“Hey, take it easy.” He shoots out of his seat. Wrapping his arms around my waist he helps me sit up. He then places three pillows behind my back.

“Doc said you should move slow for the next few days,” he says as he retakes his seat. “He left these pills.” He picks up a bottle of medicine and shakes it in front of me.

“No, no meds,” I quickly say. He looks confused by my outburst. Apparently, his brother did not tell him about my past.

“I used to be an addict. Opioids were my preferred drug of choice. I try to avoid them as best I can.”

He nods his head. Not an ounce of judgement on his face. “Alright, we can get rid of these, and I’ll get you something less addictive.”

I smile, liking his energy already.

“So, how did you end up on babysitting duty?”

He grins showing off his white teeth. “Actually, I volunteered for it.”

I must’ve looked shocked cause he again laughs before continuing. “Everyone else had their hands full, and I didn’t want you to be alone. Beastie was going through some things, so he couldn’t be here.”

The moment he mentioned Gabriel my heart started racing and so did that beeping sound.

“Is he okay?”

“Relax,” Maksim runs a hand through his hair. “Beast is fine.”

“And Gabe?”

A wide smile spreads over his face. “Gabe is doing well too. He asks about you every day and even comes to sit with you sometimes.”

That makes my heart smile. I can only imagine the fear my baby felt watching me lying here unresponsive. Not only that, but he wasn’t home in his normal domain, I know it was probably an adjustment for him.

“What happened to me?” I ask the most obvious question. The last thing I remember is standing at the stove flipping pancakes when all of a sudden, the patio door shattered and then I don’t remember much after that.

“You were shot,” he says point blank, pointing to my left shoulder. “The way the bullet traveled, you’re lucky to be alive.”

Damn, that cat analogy must be still in effect, because I’m still using up lives. It’s like I owe death something and he keeps trying to collect. It’s even more alarming that I was shot in the same shoulder my dad hit. This is the most unlucky shoulder ever.

Scrunching my brow, I ask. “Who shot me?” I want to add ‘this time’ but I leave that part out.

“Our other brother.”

I’m so confused. “I thought Gabriel was close to all his brothers?” I remember the stories he told me about Hawk, Zel, Seth, Lucien and Many. Every story led me to believe they were a tight group.

Maksim shakes his head. “Not those brothers.”

For the next twenty minutes, he fills me in on their father and his other siblings, along with the excommunication order on Beast and his brothers.

I feel like I’ve missed a lifetime of information rather than the four days he says I’ve been out. Even though there has been a lot going on, and I should be more concerned about the fact that I was shot and nearly killed, my only concern is Gabriel.

“How is Gabriel taking all of this?” Like his son, Gabriel also doesn’t do well with too many changes. Finding out that not only does he have a father and a bunch of siblings, but they’re also trying to kill him, is probably messing with his head.

Maksim scratches his chin. His gaze bouncing to the wall over my head. I’ve only known this man for a few minutes, but I can already tell whatever he’s about to say isn’t exactly the truth. The way he looks over my head and avoids eye contact is a dead giveaway.

“He’s doing fine.”

I didn’t have to see the lie on his face to know it was one. I know Gabriel enough to know he’s not alright.

Before I could respond, the room door opens, and I see the sweet face of my baby boy.

“Mama!” Gabe shouts before running into the room.

I prepare myself for him to leap onto the bed. However, just as he gets close, the deep voice that has my heart beating and my thighs squeezing calls out his name.

“Gabe. Easy. Mama’s still hurt.”

I look up toward the open door and my eyes connect to Gabriel’s. Every time I see him, it’s as if the air in my lungs is being sucked out. Seeing him now feels like the time I first saw him at that restaurant after five years. I can’t take my gaze off him.

He stares back at me just as hard as I look at him. Gabe climbs up in the bed and gently wraps his arms around my neck. I shut my eyes, basking in the joy of my son hugging me without me asking or hugging him first. He leans back on his knees and smiles up at me.

“You were sleeping a lot.”

I hold back the tears that are fighting to fall. “I know. I’m up now though. What’s been going on?”

He smiles as he starts to tell me about his papa Priest and his uncles along with his cousin Emory.

The entire time he’s talking, my eyes keep going back to the doorway where his father is still silently watching me. He has not once made a move to come into the room.

Finally, Gabe takes a break in his conversation. “Wow, seems like you’ve been having fun.”

He smiles at me.

“Yeah, I have a lot more family now, mama.”

My heart cracks open at his words. Even when he was spending time with my mother and sister he never once referred to them as family. He knew who they were. He understood that my mom was his grandma and Raina was his aunt, but he never called them family. Hearing him say this about Gabriel’s brothers and father really warms my soul.

“You’re right,” I say, my voice cracking. “You do.”

“Hey, nephew,” Maksim says getting Gabe’s attention. “How about you and I go find papa Priest and let your mom and dad have a few minutes.”

Gabe nods before climbing off my bed. Maksim stands and holds out a hand for Gabe. Gabe takes the outstretched hand and they both walk side by side to the door. Maksim stops in front of Gabriel. Although nothing is said, they stare at each other for a moment letting me know something is being communicated. Finally, Gabriel moves aside, and Maksim and Gabe walk out the room.

Gabriel still does not enter. I study his face. A sinking feeling hits my gut. I know that look in his eyes. He’s scared. Gabriel and I have had many conversations about his fear of losing me and Gabe. He always feared he would be the one that would hurt us unintentionally. Even though he didn’t pull that trigger, I already know he is taking the blame for it.

The look on his face tells me he wants to run. But he won’t. He can’t, because he promised me he would stay.

“Summer,” the way he says my name, as if it pains him, makes my heart beat erratically. The beeping in the room matches the rapid thumping against my chest.

“You know getting shot hurts like hell,” I say, my brain going into overdrive. The mouth diarrhea is about to spew.

“Summer,” he says again pushing away from the doorframe.

I continue as If I didn’t hear him. If I don’t let him speak, he can’t say anything I don’t want to hear.

“But at least I have another story to tell. I can now retire the ‘my daddy shot me story.’ Plus, this one sounds better anyway. I got shot by my boyfriend’s brother has a better draw to it than daddy issues.” I chuckle at my own dark joke.

“Summer.” He stands at the foot of my bed. Those gorgeous eyes staring at me with so much regret and pain.

“Talk about an ice breaker right. I’ll be all the rave at parties.”

“Summer,” he calls my name once again. This time I shut my eyes unwilling to see that look on his face.

“Stop it,” I demand.

Silence fills the room.

“Whatever you think you’re going to say to me, I don’t want to hear it.” I finally open my eyes and glare at him.

“I love you,” he says. However, those words don’t bring me the joy they usually would.

His tone is off, and that pain and regret are still in his eyes.

“I love you too, Gabriel.”

He shakes his head. “You will never understand how much I love you. I love you more than I love my own life. You and Gabe are the best things that have ever happened to me. But.”

Just that one simple word has tears spilling down my face. He hasn’t even said anything else, but pressure starts to build in my chest. My breath seems to be caught in my lungs.

He continues, ignoring my tears and pain. “We can’t be together.”

I shake my head refusing to accept his words. “No. No. I will not accept that. I won’t let you run away from us.”

He shoves his hands down the front pockets of his jeans. “It has to be this way.”

“It doesn’t,” I shout. “Yes, I got shot. But I’m still here. Gabe and I are both still here.”

He turns away from me, staring at the wall to my left.

“This is over.”

I gasp as my hands begin to shake. The tears fall faster now. My brain runs through so many emotions. I question myself and my values. I question if I’m at fault and what makes me so disposable to so many people. How can you tell me you love me and then toss me aside in the same sentence.

“You promised,” I choke out through my tears. “You promised you wouldn’t leave me again.”

He still doesn’t turn to look at me. His eyes are bloodshot red, and his shoulders are almost touching his ears they are so tensed.

“I know,” he simply replies.

I wait for him to say something else. For him to explain how he can so easily throw away what we have. Yet, he doesn’t say anything more.

“Please, Gabriel. Please don’t do this.” I hated that I’m reduced to begging this man. My pride is yelling at me to let him go if he doesn’t want to be here. But my heart is much louder right now. It is hemorrhaging in my chest.

“It’s done,” he says it as if it’s so easy for him.

Is it that simple for him to walk away from me? My entire world is crumbling because the man I love, the man I saw myself spending the rest of my life with is telling me we can’t be together. How is he able to walk away from me so calmly.

Gabriel turns and walks to the door. My tears continue to flow down my face as I fight to catch my breath.

He stops at the door without turning to me. “If you need anything, I’ll be here.”

“I need you,” I whisper.

He turns and looks at me over his shoulder. “I would give you the world, Summer. But I can’t give you that.”

Fighting back my tears, I lift my chin. “Then you have nothing to offer me.”

Gabriel is silent for a moment. He then dips his head and walks out of the room shutting the door behind him.

And just like that, I fall apart. My shoulders shake as sobs rake through my body. My wound burns but I don’t care because my heart hurts worse.

Not even seconds later, the door opens and Maksim walks in. He doesn’t say anything as he shuts the door and makes his way over to his chair. He takes a seat, hands me a tissue and sits back without saying a word. I now know what that look was about before he left. He knew this was going to happen. Which is also why he took Gabe out.

For longer than I’d like to admit, I cried. I cried until there were no more tears to fall. I cried until my head and my injury hurt so bad I could no longer take the pain. When Maksim finally left my room that night, I took one of the pain pills the doctor left.

Oblivion pulled me into its embrace. Darkness took me under, and the joy of dullness swallowed me. The feeling was everything I remembered it to be. Why did I ever give it up?