Beautifully Complicated (Front Range University #4)

23. Kier

Chapter twenty-three

Kier

MARCH

“ W hat’s next?” Aiden asks me as he stirs diced tomato, olive oil and a bunch of seasonings in a bowl while I brown some chicken.

We’re attempting to make chicken bruschetta, one of the twenty-four easiest recipes for beginners, so we don’t have to order in all the time or feed ourselves from a meal kit. Jury’s out on whether this will be better than the meal kits—I prefer when the ingredients come to my door instead of having to get them at the grocery, but so far it smells good.

I check the recipe. “Spoon the topping onto the chicken, sprinkle parmesan on top, and we cook it until the internal temperature reaches one-sixty-five.”

“This isn’t terrible,” Aiden remarks as he covers the chicken with the tomato topping. “When you said we should figure out how to cook I was a little worried, but I don’t hate this. It’s easier than the house mom makes it look.”

“The house mom?”

“Yeah, the woman who cooks for the fraternity. She feeds dozens of us and the kitchen always looks like a war zone when she’s done.” He swivels his head to check out the damage we’ve done, which isn’t much. “We’ve barely even spilled anything.”

“I thought you lived with three other couples?”

“I do, but I grab dinner at the fraternity house most nights. It’s easier than feeding myself. Plus, my roommates are all athletes so they’re uber strict about their diets and I like my food to have flavor.”

“You never told me you were in a fraternity.” I put the pan under the broiler like the recipe instructs to brown the cheese.

Aiden nods absently. “Joined freshman year. My dad was a legacy and wanted me to follow in his footsteps so to speak. Same with Bennet. That’s how we met. Neither of us was interested but felt obligated to make our dads proud. It ended up being a much better experience than I expected though.”

“How so?”

“Well, they’re cool with a gay nerd, for one. They throw some good parties, and the house mom feeds us really well.”

I pull the pan out and add a piece of chicken to the plates Aiden hands me. “When was the last time you went to one of those parties?”

Aiden shrugs and carries the plates to the table while I grab the wine. “Beginning of fall semester maybe?”

Beginning of… That’s close to six months ago. It’s his senior year and instead of living it up he’s playing house with his older boyfriend.

“Leanbh, you shouldn’t be missing parties with your friends to hang out with me.”

“I don’t feel like I’m missing them.” He cuts into his meal. “And before you get the wrong idea, that has nothing to do with you. I was getting tired of cheap beer and loud music almost a full year before you showed up. Besides, I see a lot of the guys when I stop for dinner, so it’s not like I’ve gone into hiding.”

“What about your roommates? When do you hang out with them?”

“We all went to see Liam’s lacrosse game two days ago.” He pops a bite into his mouth and mms . “This is really good.”

I take my own bite—it really isn’t bad—but I can’t fully enjoy our accomplishment since I’m worried about what he’s missing by spending all his time with me.

“Remember what I said about me being here no matter what?” He eyes me curiously but at least nods his head, so I continue. “We have our whole lives to make dinner together and spend our nights on the couch. You only have a few more months to enjoy the life you’ve built at school. Don’t miss out on them to start the rest of your life early.”

“What did you do your senior year of college?” He chews another bite.

“Studied. Drank too much. Had more sex than I should’ve, and just tried to enjoy my last carefree months before I had to become an adult.”

“That’s exactly what I’m doing, minus the too much drinking part.” He sips his wine and adds, “And maybe the sex part because I don’t think we’re having too much of that.”

“Leanbh, you’re spending all your weekends inside this house.” I gesture to the walls surrounding us. “That’s no way to enjoy your senior year.”

“Actually, I was thinking I might spend all of next week here, since it’s spring break.”

God, he’s incorrigible.

“You should be taking a trip. I bet your roommates are all doing something.”

“They’re going snowboarding.” He takes another bite.

“Have you even done that at all this year?” When he shakes his head I say, “You should go with them?”

“I live with them. You think I want to spend a week in a house with three horny couples that won’t have any classes or practice to give me any peace? Besides, I’d rather not be the lone single guy on vacation.”

“Wouldn’t you enjoy the chance to go snowboarding?”

Aiden’s eyes narrow somewhat playfully, though there’s a hint of unease in his gaze. “Are you trying to get rid of me?”

“Of course not. I just don’t want you to look back on this time and think you missed out on things to be with me when I’m the one who will be there the rest of your life.”

I really do hate the idea of a week without him, but it’s selfish of me to monopolize this time in his life. I’m doing the right thing by trying to get him to enjoy these last few months with his friends.

“What if you came with me?”

I pound my chest to dislodge the bite that gets stuck there. “What?” Reaching for my wine to wash it down I rasp, “I can’t vacation with a bunch of students.”

“They aren’t your students.” Aiden bites his lip. Little minx- he knows what that does to me.

“I don’t even know how to snowboard.” I shake my head.

“I’ll teach you.”

“What if someone we know recognizes me?”

“You’re so averse to the cold you’ll be unrecognizably bundled. And we won’t leave the house except to go to the mountain.”

There’s a spark in Aiden’s eyes I don’t want to be responsible for snuffing out, so even though it goes against all common sense I find myself asking, “When do we leave?”

***

My stomach pitches violently as I stand at the top of the hill looking down, but I don’t think it’s the slope of the hill that has me so worked up.

It’s actually not that steep—the sledding hill might have been worse—so my trepidation isn’t about careening down the hill out of control. It’s about making a fool of myself in front of Aiden’s friends, all of whom are here to help me down the hill.

It’s not that I don’t appreciate their willingness to be here when they could be on more advanced terrain, but learning a sport in front of accomplished athletes is a little daunting. At least they all seem like decent, if slightly immature, guys.

“I hope you took a piss already, because it’s gonna take you thirty minutes at least to find your dick under all those layers,” Jagger cackles.

“Can you even lower your arms?” Cam chimes in.

“I can feel them, so no frostbite,” I justify my oversized coat.

“I actually think it’s pretty toasty, and I’m from Arizona,” Liam says.

At least they’re treating me like one of them.

“Did we decide which foot you lead with when we set up your bindings?” Aiden asks as he sets my board on the ground.

Back at the house they had me stand on the board to get the straps over my boots positioned—something about making sure I had the right center of gravity—but no one said anything about leading feet.

“I don’t know what that means,” I tell him.

“Which foot do you want in the front?” he clarifies.

“Which foot do you have in front?”

“It doesn’t work like that,” Cam says. “You have to lead with the foot that feels natural to you.”

“How do I know what that is?”

A firm shove from behind has me pitching forward so I have to take a step to avoid falling.

“Left foot,” Jagger declares, probably because that’s the foot that broke my fall.

“You could’ve warned him, Kitcat,” Cam tells his boyfriend, using some nickname Aiden tells me has a top secret meaning. I assume the guy just has a weakness for the candy bar.

“Warnings defeat the purpose of acting on instinct,” Liam says.

“Exactly,” Jagger agrees.

Aiden gives me an apologetic look from under his helmet and kneels before me to help me get my feet in. When his are similarly positioned he reminds me of the pointers we went over on the gondola on the way up.

“Your front leg does the steering, back controls speed. Keep your weight over the front.”

I lean forward in what’s supposed to be a lunge but isn’t really since both feet are strapped to the board. Before I even move an inch, Aiden is guiding me to stand upright.

“Don’t lean so much, just try to carry your weight on your front leg.”

“How do I do that without leaning?” I ask.

“Pretend like you’re standing on one leg,” Cruz says. I open my mouth to object—I can’t pretend to do that if they’re both strapped down—but he cuts me off. “Don’t compensate by leaning forward, just give that leg your weight. That’ll increase the pressure on the front of the board and gravity will do the rest.”

Despite being mostly vertical, I do slide forward a bit.

A chorus of nice and good job echoes around me, but it’s Aiden’s that’s it, Maoin that means the most.

As we come to the section of the hill where the slope increases, Aiden instructs me to stop. “Remember to keep your weight forward. If you lean back, you’ll pick up speed.”

“ When that happens,” Jagger says, “because it will. Try to center your weight and rock back on your heels. It’s like putting on the brake.”

I get going again, and for a few seconds everything is great. I feel stable, I’m coasting along nicely, and it’s actually fun. Then suddenly I’m going a little too fast for comfort, so I rock back on my heels, turn somewhat left and end up on my ass.

Aiden glides up beside me and drops to his knees. “Are you okay?”

“Tell me again why I couldn’t stay at the house with Damien?” He’s the only other person in the group that’s never done this, but he got a free pass since he doesn’t want to get injured before the draft.

“Bennet’s there.” I turn to see Liam over my left shoulder.

“So?”

“So, they’re probably taking advantage of an empty house.” I turn to see Cam over my right shoulder.

“Ah,” I say.

“Okay, let’s go again.” Aiden pulls me to standing with the help of a push from Cam so I can give it another go. And promptly fall.

“This is futile,” I grumble as the group helps me to stand.

“I have an idea.” Cruz hops on his board until he’s standing directly in front of me, hands outstretched.

Glancing nervously at his boyfriend, Liam, I ask, “Do you know what this is about?”

“I have a guess,” he answers.

Figuring that’s as good as permission, I put my hands in Cruz’s.

“I ride with my right foot in front, so we’re like a mirror, and I’m strong enough to keep you under control. I’ll help you get a feel for how to ride.”

With Cruz to control our speed and guiding the motion of our turns, we make it the rest of the way down the hill without stopping. And I have to admit, Aiden was right. Once you get moving you don’t notice the cold.

I take another run with Cruz, who’s strength helps counter my lack of skill, and for my final run of the day Aiden takes his place, which is a little less productive since he’s not strong enough to muscle me into position, but just as fun since it’s the two of us together.

Later, when we’re all melting into the couches since we’re too sore for much else, Aiden tucks himself into my side, snuggling against me the way all the other couples are positioned. I can’t help but recall how he once mentioned living with three happy couples, and being surrounded by all this affection when he’s been alone must have been so depressing. It makes me a little relieved that a condition of him coming on this trip was that I join him, so that he’s not left out of these moments.

I kiss the top of his head, just because I can.

“I’m just saying, Kier survived and he’s old enough to be Aiden’s dad,” Jagger tells Damien from his spot on Cam’s lap.

“Hey,” Aiden objects. “Ten years is not old enough to be my dad.”

Jagger gives him a dismissive wave. “You know what I mean.” He turns back to Damien. “You’re missing out.”

“Better he miss out on snowboarding than a career.” Bennet rolls his eyes at Jagger.

“I do both,” Jagger says.

“Because you’ve been boarding your whole life,” Bennet retorts.

“If you go pro a team might have a clause in your contract that you can’t do things that bring unnecessary risk.” Cam kisses the back of Jagger’s neck.

“So I’ll stick to black diamond instead of double black diamond,” Jagger rationalizes.

“And when you break a leg?” Bennet prompts.

“Liam will bandage me up and Cam will get me back in playing shape,” he says.

“Liam is pre-med, and Cam is physical therapy,” Aiden whispers in my ear.

“That’s not the kind of medicine I want to practice.” Liam tells Jagger.

“Yeah, but don’t you have to learn the basics? Setting bones seems like it would be pretty basic.” Jagger says.

“Only if you’re lucky,” Damien says. “My teammate broke his leg in a game once; guy hasn’t walked right since.”

“Maybe a bunch of athletes wanting to go pro shouldn’t talk about broken bones,” Cruz says with a visible shudder.

There’s a chorus of yeahs .

“Where are you hoping to get drafted?” I ask Damien. Apparently, he’s the only one trying to go pro this year. Jagger and Cruz will try for next.

“It’s not so much where as when. I’d like to go early,” he answers.

“Yeah, but if you go early you go to a shit team,” Bennet says.

“Maybe they’ll be better with me on it,” Damien says, and it’s so genuine I think he believes it.

“Damien’s a perpetual glass half full guy,” Aiden whispers.

“That’s the spirit babe.” Bennet pats Damien’s leg but rolls his eyes when Damien can’t see.

“I felt that,” Damien says.

“That supportive pat on the knee. I would hope so.” Bennet feigns ignorance.

“I don’t care what kind of team the early picks go to. Early means you’re one of the best, so I’d rather go early,” Jagger says.

“Me, too,” Cruz agrees.

“You play too, right?” I ask Cam. “Why aren’t you going pro?”

“Don’t want to be split up from Jagger.”

“We’re ridiculously codependent.” Jagger draws a line between the two of them.

“Is that good or bad?” I’m genuinely curious, since I know some people will think I’ve developed an unhealthy attachment to Aiden when they learn about us, and I’d like to be armed with a credible response.

“It works for us,” Jagger says.

That’s… a brilliant answer. I’m going to steal it.

“So, is Aiden going to be a co-CEO of this company you’re building?” Liam asks.

I’ve learned that while the residents of Aiden’s house keep each other’s secrets, there aren’t any secrets between residents. Not anymore.

“We haven’t talked about titles. What do you want yours to be, Leanbh?”

“Do consulting firms have partners like law firms? If they do, he could be your partner and your partner.” Damien beams.

Glass half full. I see it.

“Do you like that idea?” I ask Aiden.

He stops himself just before biting down on that full lower lip, leaving my dignity intact. “Yes, I do. That way we don’t have to specify if we’re talking about work or not, we can just be partners.”

“Perfect.” I kiss those gorgeous lips and excuse myself to use the restroom, running into Bennet when I come out. I try to sidestep so he can use the facilities, but he stops me with a hand to the chest.

“You’re good for him,” he says as he drops his hand. “I wasn’t sure at first, the whole working for you thing, but I see it.”

“Thank you,” I reply, since I’m not sure what else to say to that.

“He’s going to have it rough, isn’t he?” Bennet’s brow furrows. “When this all comes out, peoples’ first instinct will be to think he’s riding your success? That he earned it in the bedroom and not the lab?”

“That’s my fear, yes.”

“Is there any way to stop it? He’s too brilliant to get caught up in that crap.”

“I’m not sure we can stop it, but I’m going to do everything I can to minimize it. And since he is brilliant, I know people will eventually see that.”

“How long will that take?” Bennet presses his lips into a firm line.

“I don’t know. But while I may have the experience, he’s my intellectual equal. Once people see us work together, the way we can bounce things off one another, the talk will shift toward what an asset he is. As soon as we have clients, we’ll start to make the case that he earned the role in the lab.”

“I worry about him, you know.” Bennet turns toward the living room we can just barely see from where we’re standing in the hall. “He just feels everything so deeply.”

Bennet’s not wrong, though I do find it ironic he’s aware of that particular trait while being completely oblivious to Aiden’s prior feelings for him. I know he means well though, so I don’t say anything.

“That’s one of the reasons I love him. But he’s stronger than he looks, and he’s not going to let anyone else’s opinions stop him from leading the life he wants.”

Bennet nods and sticks out his hand. “That’s what I wanted to hear. Thanks.”

I shake it, feeling oddly relieved. I was never concerned about getting Bennet’s approval, but I’m glad to have it all the same.