Behaving Badly in Vegas (Vegas Love #3)

12. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Hunter

Giving Charlotte the night off wasn’t completely selfless.

Although I’d only had her a brief time, I missed my daughter and thought about her all day. I didn’t want to be an absentee father. It was bad enough her mother took off without a second thought. One thing I could say about my father, is he was always there for me. He didn’t miss Little League games because of meetings or skip out on school functions. I always knew I could depend on him.

Carina deserved someone she could depend on.

Despite Charlotte’s pitiful résumé and lack of experience with children, there was no doubt she’d taken good care of my daughter today. I even caught her singing that stupid song when I walked in. Her voice was absolutely awful, but Carina liked it. She needed someone like Charlotte in her life because the last words anyone would ever use to describe me were warm and nurturing.

Also, I liked finding Charlotte in the kitchen making dinner a little too much. I didn’t expect her to cook, but she did. Coming home to an empty apartment was my norm. I usually heated something in the microwave or picked up takeout on the way home. It’d been a while since someone cooked for me. Sitting together at the table with Carina felt like we were a family.

We weren’t.

I didn’t have any delusions about that, but it still felt nice.

I didn’t do relationships. Never had anything more than a few repeat dates in my life. I didn’t have the time or the inclination. There was no sense getting attached to a woman. When she realized I wasn’t a decent human being and I couldn’t treat her right, she’d leave anyway.

Sex was easy, love was complicated. I’d never felt that tingly sensation people talked about. Never fell head over heels for a woman. Never needed to have someone to come home to.

I was perfectly happy as a lone wolf. I could do what I wanted when I wanted without having to report to anyone. When I had needs to be satisfied, it wasn’t hard to fill them. And when I got the release I craved, I left. No strings. No complications.

It was a good life.

Charlotte was a complication. The less I was around her, the better. I didn’t need to see her making my daughter giggle. I didn’t need to hear her terrible singing. And I definitely didn’t need to see her long legs or perky little tits.

After I cleaned up the kitchen, I took Carina for her nightly bath. Charlotte had lined up all of Carina’s new tub toys along the ledge of the tub like little soldiers. I filled the tub with a few inches of warm water, stripped Carina down, and set her in the tub seat. She kicked her little legs in the warm water and giggled.

“You like this, don’t you?” I handed her the rubber turtle and let her go to town, squeaking the thing until my ears hurt. She played while I kneeled next to the tub and gently washed her soft skin from her squash-covered face to her tiny toes. She made a grabby motion with her hands, so I tossed a few more toys into the tub. The rubber frog squeaked as she chewed on his eye. She didn’t have any teeth yet, but from what I’d read, I expected to see some popping through on the bottom soon .

“You got crap luck, kid. Anyone would have been a better father than me. I’ve got no idea what I’m doing, but I promise I’ll try. You’ll never want for anything. If you need me, I’ll be there. But just so you know, when you get old enough to start dating, I’m going to be a total dick to any boy you bring home. You should know that up front, so there’re no surprises later. And don’t even think about sneaking out at night. I’ve done every trick in the book, so you won’t get away with it. If necessary, I’ll build a moat around our house to keep you safe. What do you think of that?”

Carina reached her arms out to me. “Gah, dah, bah.”

I chuckled. “You say that now, but I’m sure when you’re a teenager, you’ll think I’m an overprotective asshole. And you’ll be right. That’s exactly what I’m going to be.” I picked up her foot and looked at her wrinkly toes. “Time to get out, princess.”

I lifted her out of the tub, and she let out a huge fart. It stunk. “Jesus Christ, how can something so little smell so bad?” She kicked her legs and laughed at me. That’s when I noticed the brown sludge dripping down the backs of her legs. With one more kick, it splattered across the front of my shirt. “You’ve got to be kidding me.” I held her in the air over the tub. I couldn’t put her back in the water and I’d left the towel on the other side of the bathroom.

My stomach turned. I could feel the vomit making its way up my esophagus. I took a deep breath and pushed it down. “Oh, god. Charlotte!” The smell invaded my nose, and my stomach flipped again. The poop dripped off her heels and splashed into the water. I turned and dry heaved over my shoulder. “Charlotte! Goddamn it, where are you? CHAR-LOTTE!”

Her feet pounded on the hardwood floor and into the bathroom. “What...”

“Help me!”

She stood there slack-jawed. “Oh my god! There’s poop everywhere.”

“No shit, Sherlock! Do something!” My stomach rumbled and I dry heaved again. If she didn’t hurry my spaghetti was going to make a reappearance .

“Are you gonna puke?”

“Charlotte!”

“Right…” She grabbed the pink towel off the counter and held it up, twisting it this way and that. “I don’t know where to begin.”

“That’ll smear it. Grab the showerhead and rinse her off!”

“Smart thinking.” She scrambled over me, her crotch practically in my face, and pulled the showerhead down. She turned on the water and the tub began to fill. “I don’t know how to work this thing.” Charlotte pounded her hand on the sprayer like that was a logical way to turn it on.

“There’s a button on the side,” I growled.

“Wher—” Water burst from the nozzle, hitting her in the face. She screamed, then frantically aimed it at me. Water drenched my chest and sprayed all over the bathroom.

“Jesus Christ! Get her ass and legs!” My arms were getting tired, and I was afraid of dropping her.

Charlotte finally aimed the sprayer at Carina and began rinsing her off. “I’m so sorry,” she apologized as brown water ran down my daughter’s legs. “That should be… oh my god, she’s doing it again!”

Carina laughed and kicked as more poop ran down her legs.

Fuck! We were never going to get her clean. “Switch places with me! Hurry!” Charlotte dropped the sprayer, and I handed Carina to her. “Hold her over the tub!” I rinsed the poop off, then quickly grabbed a washcloth and some soap, wiped her down, and rinsed her again. I swiped the towel from where Charlotte had dropped it on the floor and wrapped Carina in it. “Quick, go get a diaper!”

Charlotte dashed from the bathroom, nearly falling as her bare feet slipped on the wet floor. She came back with a diaper and a package of wipes. “Just in case,” she said as she held them up.

When I finally got the diaper on Carina, I laid her on the dry rug and sat on the floor. Charlotte slid down the wall next to me, looking like a drowned cat. The bathroom still stunk, the tub was full of murky water, and there were flecks of brown on the shower walls. It was as if a bomb went off. A poop bomb .

“That was intense,” she whispered as her wet hair dripped down her face.

“Ya think?”

She tilted her head to the side. “Were you really gonna throw up?”

“I have a weak stomach.” There was no sense denying it since she’d seen me retching.

“Then maybe I shouldn’t tell you… you’ve got a little… poop on your shirt.”

I’d forgotten about that. I looked down and it was even worse now that my shirt was plastered to my chest. Without another thought, I ripped the wet shirt off and threw it to the side. “Hand me the wipes.”

“You want one or two?” she asked, pulling them from the container.

“Give me the whole damn box.” I could literally feel the poop soaking into my skin as I scrubbed furiously.

“You think it was the squash?”

“I’ve got no fucking idea, but that was horrible.”

“It really was.” She laughed. “You should have seen your face.” She laughed again, then snorted, which made her laugh even harder. “You were all like… bleh, bleh.” Her imitation of my dry heaving made me smile.

“It wasn’t that bad.”

“It was pretty bad.” Charlotte snorted again and wiped the tears from her eyes. “Oh my…” She took a deep breath and immediately covered her nose. “Is cleaning this up part of my job?”

I scratched the back of my neck. “I don’t think we discussed hazmat duties.”

“I’ll flip you for it,” she suggested.

I glanced at the murky water and my stomach turned. There was no way I could do it without actually vomiting. “How about I pay you an extra hundred bucks instead?”

She cocked her head from side to side, considering my proposal. “Deal. I hope you have bleach.”

“In the laundry room closet.” I looked at my daughter, who’d fallen asleep on the rug. “Who knew someone so little could do so much damage?” Picking Carina up, I cradled her in my arms. “I’ll put this little terrorist to bed. Thank you, Charlotte.”

“I think after what we’ve been through tonight, you can call me Charli now.” She pushed back the wet hair on her face, revealing a black line dripping down her cheek where her mascara had run. She was a complete mess.

I liked it a little too much.

“Good night, Charli.”