Better than Sex (San Francisco Sex Gods #1)

Chapter 36

THIRTY-SIX

Spencer

Spencer found it difficult to focus on his photo editing. His mind kept wandering to thoughts about Mickey and Keith. He didn’t even know what this Keith guy looked like. Resigned to the fact that he wasn’t going to get any work done, he opened a new window and searched for local dog rescue shelters.

The closest one was called Underdogs. He clicked on the About tab, and the first staff member listed was the general manager – Keith Steller. “That’s got to be him.” He zoomed in on the headshot. “Damn.” He was a good-looking guy. Nice smile. Great hair. And he was cuddling a puppy.

How do I compete with puppies?

He switched over to Instagram and scrolled through Keith’s photos. In addition to the expected pictures of dogs from the shelter, there were pictures of Keith with his friends doing all the outdoorsy shit that held zero interest for Spencer – hiking, camping, kayaking.

An image popped into his head of Keith and Mickey hiking a wooded trail with the two rescue dogs they adopted, holding hands and kissing by a waterfall.

Spencer bristled at the thought of another man kissing Mickey. His whole body tensed and his fingernails dug into his thighs. I bet Keith smells like a wet dog all the time. He closed his laptop with an angry huff and threw himself back against the couch cushions.

His phone rang. “What now?” When he saw it was Xander, he rolled his eyes and answered. “Xander, I told you I don’t want to come out tonight. I’m not in a sex vulture kind of mood.”

“Hello to you, too. I thought you’d want to know that Mick is here with his friend.”

“Oh, the wonderful Keith?”

“Who the hell is Keith? He’s here with that girl he hangs out with.”

Spencer sat up straight. “He’s with Jazz?”

“Yeah, sure, whatever her name is. He signed up for speed dating.”

“So, he’s not there with a guy?”

“Well, one might say he’s here with a bunch of guys.”

“Xander,” Spencer warned.

“Look, you like him, right?”

“Yeah, I like him.”

Xander was silent for a moment. “Do you love him?”

Spencer raked his fingers through his hair. “I think I might.”

Xander’s sigh was clearly audible, despite the background noise of the bar. “Then get your ass down here and get your man.”

Spencer sprang to his feet. Was he going to do this? Was he going to rush to the Blind Tiger, crash the speed dating event, and bare his soul to Mickey? He paced back and forth in the living room. “Should I take a shower? I should change my clothes. Should I change?”

“Dude. You’re fine. Just get here as soon as you can.”

Spencer cradled his phone against his shoulder and pulled on his sneakers. “I’m on my way.”

“You better hurry,” Xander teased. “He looks really good tonight. Somebody might scoop him up.”

“Don’t let him leave,” Spencer barked before hanging up and jamming his phone into his back pocket. He grabbed his helmet and scooter and ran to the elevator. He pounded the call button over and over, but was too keyed up to wait for the car.

Fumbling to put his helmet on with one hand, he raced down the five flights to the ground floor, taking the stairs two at a time. As soon as he reached the lobby, he started his scooter and rode it past the wall of mailboxes and out the front door, which a surprised neighbor held open for him.

“Thanks!” he yelled over his shoulder as he zoomed off in the direction of the bar.

When Spencer stepped through the door of the Blind Tiger, the men in the front booths and several guys seated at the bar all turned and regarded him with quizzical looks. A few of the bastards even smirked. Dressed in a hoodie and slouchy sweat shorts, it looked like he’d stumbled in wearing his pajamas, which wasn’t far from the truth. It certainly didn’t help that he was carrying an electric scooter. To say he stood out like a sore thumb was an understatement.

Clearly he hadn’t thought this through. He should look his best for Mickey. He could go home, text him to meet after the event, hop in the shower, put on a nice shirt…

An unmistakable laugh cut through the buzz in the bar.

Mickey was less than twenty feet away, looking incredible, laughing with his date – a young man with dark hair, an obnoxious raspberry-colored blazer, and the audacity to touch Mickey’s hand while they chatted.

Galvanized, Spencer marched over to the table where they were seated. It was only when he was three steps away from them that he recognized the man sitting across from Mickey. Fuck my life.

Mickey’s smile morphed into open-mouthed surprise. “Spencer? What? How…”

“Xander told me you were here.”

Mickey’s date sat back in his chair. His mouth slid into an unctuous smile. “Aren’t you going to say hi to me?”

Spencer exhaled heavily. “Hello, Rafe.”

“You two know each other?” Mickey’s gaze darted between the men.

“Well, know is a strong word,” Rafe said. “Let’s just say we’re acquainted. Intimately.”

“You’ve hooked up.” Mickey stared at Spencer, shaking his head. “Unbelievable.”

“The helmet is a good look for you,” Rafe teased. “Afraid you might get a concussion from hitting a headboard?”

Spencer rifled through his wallet and pressed a twenty-dollar bill into Rafe’s hand. “Go and get something to drink.”

“Aw, I didn’t know you cared.”

“Rafe, please,” Spencer said, an edge of irritation in his voice. “I’d like a few minutes to talk to Mickey.”

“Fine.” Rafe gracefully rose from his chair and tucked the bill into his breast pocket. “I’m keeping the change.” He bowed his head to Mickey. “Good night, Mickey. It was lovely meeting you.”

“You too,” Mickey said. He crossed his arms and turned his attention to Spencer while Rafe made his way to the bar. “And where did you and Rafe meet?”

Spencer groaned. “Bingo night. For charity.”

Mickey broke into a smile and muttered under his breath. “Oh my god.”

“Hear me out?” Spencer slipped into the chair and clasped his hands on the table.

Mickey glanced at the red numbers on the oversized digital timer. “You have five minutes and thirty-eight seconds.”

“I’m sorry,” Spencer blurted. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about my fuck-it list. You were right. I should’ve told you. But when we had sex…” He hesitated, a phrase he rarely used dancing on the tip of his tongue. Until this moment, it had never felt right, but now that phrase was the only way to adequately describe what he and Mickey had shared. “When I made love to you – it meant something. You have to know that our night together wasn’t just me checking something off a list.”

“Xander said you slept with me because of your list.”

“He was wrong,” Spencer snapped, causing Mickey to flinch. Men who were seated nearby fell silent and turned to face them. He rubbed his hand over his mouth, took a breath, and said quietly, “He was wrong, okay? If all this was just about the list, we would have had sex on my birthday. We almost did.”

Mickey leaned forward and rested his crossed arms on the table. “Why didn’t we do it that night? I basically threw myself at you. Why did you reject me?”

“I didn’t…reject you. You weren’t ready. You were drunk, and high…Look, I didn’t want to do to you what Garrett had done to me.”

Mickey held up his hand. “Wait. Who’s Garrett?”

“My first boyfriend.” Spencer sighed. He’d come to apologize, not rehash his past heartache, but there was no sense holding back now. Mickey deserved to know everything, and this might be his only chance to tell him.

“My parents’ marriage was a sham. They didn’t love each other, they just used each other to get what they wanted. So when I was old enough to date, I wanted the opposite of that. The real thing. True love.” Spencer shook his head bitterly.

“I thought I’d found that with Garrett. We met at a party my freshman year of college. He was there visiting a mutual friend. Since he went to a different school, most of our relationship was long distance. We would talk during the week, visit on weekends. For spring break, though, we got to spend a whole week together at the beach. On our first night there, I gave him my virginity. It was beautiful, with the moonlight reflecting off the ocean, and the sound of the waves – I couldn’t have imagined a more perfect night.

“He visited me a few times that summer. On my birthday, I finally told him I’d fallen in love with him. And he basically laughed at me. He thought we were just having fun. The whole time we were together he’d been fucking other guys. All those feelings I had about my perfect first time were ruined.”

A man behind Spencer gasped. Spencer spun in his seat and found that the speed dating event had come to a standstill. Every man was facing their table, listening with rapt attention. “ Oh for Chrissake, ” he mumbled.

He turned back to Mickey. “Garrett broke my heart. I decided then and there that love was a lie. Later that night I went out to get drunk and I met Xander. We spent the night drinking and riling each other up. We were fed up with feelings and getting hurt. That was the night we started calling ourselves sex gods. We came up with the rules and we dedicated our lives to sex.

“And for the last ten years, it’s been great. I can’t tell you how many guys I’ve slept with. It was just one after another, and it was hot and really fun…” Spencer trailed off when Mickey’s expression turned icy and he leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms tightly in front of himself.

“And I’m just one guy in a long line of hookups,” Mickey said, his lower lip quivering slightly.

“That’s just it, you aren’t. You’re different.”

Mickey let his hands drop to his lap. “Why did you offer to make me into a sex god?”

Spencer averted his gaze. “Um…”

“It’s because I was a virgin, and you needed me to finish your list.”

His knee bouncing under the table, and desperation creeping into his voice, Spencer said, “At first, yes, but—”

“And the makeover?”

“It wasn’t to fix you, or make you good enough for my friends, or anything like that. I was attracted to you from the moment we met outside of the diner. I wanted to help you find your confidence, so you could see yourself the way I see you.”

Staring at his hands, Mickey asked, “How do you see me?”

“Mickey? Will you please look at me?” When Mickey met his gaze, Spencer continued. “You’re beautiful. Maybe the most beautiful man I’ve ever met.”

Mickey scoffed and shook his head.

“It’s true. I love everything about you – your eyes, your lips, your hair, your body. But it’s more than physical. You’re thoughtful, and sensitive, and honest…” Spencer’s voice grew thick. He cleared his throat. “Listen, I know I went about this all wrong. I should’ve been honest with you right from the start. And when I realized I was starting to like you as more than a friend, I should’ve said something.

“So I’m saying it now. I like you. I want to be with you. And only you. I want to be your boyfriend.” Spencer slid his open hands palm up across the table. “Please give me a chance.”

Tentatively, Mickey placed his hands over Spencer’s. He said nothing, though, and his expression was unreadable. Spencer glanced at the timer. Ten seconds left.

He gripped Mickey’s hands, clinging to him like a lifeline. The entire bar had fallen silent. Spencer’s dry throat clicked when he tried to swallow.

5 seconds.

“Mickey?” Spencer’s heart was a rapid, insistent thump in his ears. “Please say something.”

The buzzer went off, and men started to stir in their seats. The date was over, the big moment had passed. Everything was going to move forward without him.

He couldn’t give up yet. If these were the last words he’d get to say to Mickey, he was going to make them count.

“The first night we were here, I should have written your name on that ballot rather than listen to all the bullshit stories in my head. I should have picked you.”

Mickey sat in silence, staring at their joined hands.

A blond man in a green and white striped shirt stepped up to the table and awkwardly fidgeted with his cuff buttons. “Um…”

Mickey pulled his hands from Spencer’s.

Stinging from rejection, Spencer muttered, “I’ll let you get on with your night.”

As he was rising from his chair, Mickey lunged across the table and grabbed Spencer’s hoodie with both hands, closing the distance between them and pulling him into a kiss. Melting with relief, Spencer cradled Mickey’s jaw and kissed him back, licking Mickey’s lower lip and moaning with satisfaction when their tongues finally met.

The guy standing near their table cleared his throat. “Time’s up.”

Reluctantly, Mickey pulled back from the kiss and wiped his lips with the back of his hand. “Sorry. I’m leaving with him.”

Taken aback, the man frowned. “Then what do I do?”

“You go on a date with me,” Xander said, stepping up to the table.

With obvious interest, the guy looked Xander up and down and smiled. “Okay.” He turned to Spencer and pointed to his chair. “Do you mind?”

Spencer held up his hands and backed away from the chair. “Be my guest.”

Xander peeled the name tag off Mickey’s shirt and pressed it onto his own. He patted Mickey on the back. “Go be mushy somewhere else.”

“Thank you,” Mickey said.

“Uh-huh.” Xander slipped into Mickey’s chair, his focus squarely on the handsome blond gentleman sitting across from him.

Spencer threw his arms around Xander’s neck and planted an exaggerated kiss on the top of his head. “Thank you, roomie. I love you.”

Laughing, Xander pushed him away. “Ugh! Go. Make looove with your boyfriend ,” he teased, adding a full-body shudder for good measure.

“Shall we?” Spencer took Mickey’s hand and grabbed his scooter from where it had been leaning against their table. On their way to the bar, Madge blew them a kiss and held her hands over her heart.

Mickey looked over his shoulder. Xander was sizing up his date, watching him intensely with his cool, calculating gaze. “Xander’s going to be okay, right?”

“Oh yeah,” Spencer said. “He’s being a sex vulture tonight.”

Mickey snapped back to face Spencer. “I’m sorry, what?”

Rolling his eyes, Spencer chuckled. “Never mind.”

Jazz smiled as they approached where she was seated at the bar. “This is an unexpected surprise, Spencer.” She pointed at his scooter. “Did you rob a teenager on the way over to win Mickey back?”

“Ha ha,” Spencer said, trying unsuccessfully to be indignant. “A scooter is a completely respectable mode of transit for adults.” When Jazz and Mickey laughed, he held out for three whole seconds before he joined in. “I know it looks silly, but it’s fun.”

Jazz turned her attention to her friend. “So he’s apologized? Everything’s good now?”

Mickey looked fondly at Spencer and nodded. “We’re good.”

“We still have a lot to talk about,” Spencer said, bringing Mickey’s hand to his lips for a kiss. “I think we’re going to head out.”

Mickey looked between his best friend and his newly-minted boyfriend, his smile wavering. “I feel bad for leaving early. Do you want us to stay?”

Nathan brought Jazz a fresh cocktail. “If you want to hang, I can give you a ride home at the end of my shift.”

She lifted the maraschino cherry garnish off her drink, closed her lips around it, and slowly slid it off the tiny plastic sword. “Offer accepted.” She hopped off the bar stool and hugged Mickey. “You guys have fun tonight.” In a volume only he could hear, she added, “I told you you’d meet the man of your dreams tonight.”

Smiling from ear to ear, Mickey and Spencer said good night and hurried to the door.

“Want to go back to my place? Xander’s here, so we’ll have the apartment to ourselves.”

“My place is closer,” Mickey said, a glint in his eye. He hooked his fingers in Spencer’s belt loops and pulled him forward until their half-hard dicks were pressed together. It was a very compelling argument.

“Yup, your place is good. Here.” Spencer unfastened his helmet and secured it on Mickey’s head. He unfolded his scooter and stepped onto the board. “Hop on.”

Mickey positioned himself on the board behind Spencer and wrapped his arms around his waist. “This is new.”

“Birthday present. Ready?” He turned on the scooter and carefully navigated to the first dip in the curb that granted him access to the street.

“Is it legal to ride double?”

“Nope. We better get to your place as quick as possible. Hold on tight!” Spencer squeezed the throttle, and they were off, their laughter joining the whirr of the motor as they zoomed down the street toward Mickey’s neighborhood.