Beyond the Stix (Warrior Black #2)

Chapter 16

SIXTEEN

Connor

What the fuck did I do?

The absolute ire on all on my friends’ faces has me stepping back from them. If I had kept my big mouth shut about Jessup, I wouldn’t have been shoved in the back bedroom, again, and be bombarded with questions I don’t want to answer.

But John pissed me off. He shouldn’t have gone through my phone—through my messages. I had the situation with Jessup handled. Besides, how in the hell did he get my password? And what does a deep dive mean?

Granted, I’ve been going half-cocked since Dad passed. But I have every right to blow a fuse over what John did. Still, why didn’t I ask him why he did it? I don’t suppose it matters anymore, though, since Danny told Tobias to get John off the bus.

At the moment, John’s the least of my worries. I gawk at my friends, who are crowding around me like fucking vultures, hungry for answers.

Rafe folds his arms across his chest and glares. Bobby rips open the end of a pixie stick, his brown eyes filled with hurt.

“Back the fuck up,” I bark, but none of them move.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Callum steps up, matching Danny’s solemn face.

It’s too late to hide anything about Jessup. There’s only one thing to say, the truth. “It happened once… I think. I barely remember it myself. But seriously, I haven’t thought about it for a long time. In years,” I finally admit to my friends.

“Is that why we never saw your uncle when we were at your house? The parties your parents threw? I don’t remember him,” Rafe says as he tugs on his left earlobe.

“Me either.” Bobby crunches the last bit of candy off the stick. “And I’m glad. What if he did…”

“Don’t even go there.” Danny points to our drummer. “I need to talk to Connor. Alone.”

“Here we go again,” Rafe mutters and rolls his eyes. He unlocks the door and walks out.

“We’ll be just outside,” Bobby says with a thumbs up.

Callum just stands there. “I can’t believe you didn’t trust us with your secret.” He then storms out of the room, like my silence is a betrayal of our friendship.

“Give me a second.” Then Danny rushes out.

“Shit.” I rub my face in frustration. I knew eventually this was going to happen, but I didn’t think it was going to implode in a way that made my friends mad at me .

I glance out the window, and realize the bus has stopped. Muted voices catch my attention, then I see Bobby’s blue-black, afro mohawk pass my view, along with Rafe following along.

As Bobby and Rafe head inside the gas mart, I spot John talking with Tobias. They are in a heated discussion, until a red sedan pulls up and a guy slides out of the driver’s seat.

Shit. My jealousy rears up like a mad ogre, as I catch sight of a gorgeous man—who is smiling at John as though he has the power to make the world spin around. The driver rounds the front of the car and stands way too fucking close to my bodyguard.

John’s not your bodyguard any more. You kicked him out.

No matter if John isn’t mine, my possessiveness overrides my common sense and I want to rush out there and sucker-punch the stranger in the throat for touching what’s supposed to be mine. But then John hugs the guy, and my insides seize up and I can’t seem to take in a whole breath.

Get a hold of yourself, asshole. You don’t need him.

I keep repeating those words in my head, hoping I’ll eventually believe them.

Danny storms back into the room. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

I swivel my head his way. “What?”

“What do you mean what? John’s gone,” Danny says, annoyance lining his frown. “And now, Callum is upset. And you know what happens when he’s stressing.”

“Why the fuck is he mad? So what if I didn’t tell you guys what happened. It has been years. I’m not affected by it.” The second those words are out of my mouth I know them to be a lie.

The shift on Danny’s face from anger to one of dejection hits me harder than a punch in the face.

“First and foremost,” he declares between clenched teeth, “…we are family. The five of us. Remember how hurt you all were when you learned that Siles was abusing me? What happens to us—even if it was in the past, affects all of us. We all were hit when your father died. What did you think would happen when we found out about that son of a bitch—being a sick-fuck who did shit to you when you were a kid?”

I don’t have a good answer for Danny. Because there isn’t one, so I keep quiet.

“You can’t just brush this off, Con. And not telling the guys—me, the truth? That hurts more than you realize. Don’t you see that?”

I drop onto the bed and cover my face with both hands. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Tell me the full truth,” Danny says as he sits next to me and puts a hand on my arm.

So, I do, at least everything I can remember. Then I tell him what Jessup said to me, and all of the text messages he has left on my phone.

“Jesus,” Danny utters. “What about John?”

“He went snooping in my phone without my permission. And you know how I feel about that.”

“I do. Did he at any point ask you who sent the texts and what they were about?”

I pause, looking at my friend with guilt. “Not exactly.”

“What do you mean not exactly?” One of his eyebrows arches high in question.

“He asked me who was blowing up my phone, and I lied, and told him it was nothing,” I say with an expelled breath. “I’m a fucking idiot.”

“I’d say so,” Danny agrees with an inkling of a smile.

I glance out the window again, and my heart lurches at the sight. John is getting into the passenger side of that red sedan and then they take off. Suddenly I feel bereft, like all the air in my lungs has evaporated, and I can’t breathe.

And the next thing I know I’m on the ground, and I’m looking up at Danny and Tobias, who are hovering over me.

“He passed out.” I think that’s what Danny says, but I’m not too sure since there’s ringing in my ears. The sudden brightness in the room isn’t helping either.

“Lay him in bed.” I think that’s Pen or Dom talking.

“Should we call an ambulance?” someone else asks.

“I want to lay down,” I whisper to no one specifically. In fact, I want to keep my eyes closed and sleep, as misery bleeds into my body.

“Good idea.” I’m sure that’s Bobby.

Tobias and Danny help me into bed. I don’t bother with my clothes, but my friend takes off my shoes. “Call me if you need anything,” he says, before quiet settles in the room.

The overwhelming grief I’ve kept at bay is now drowning my heart with remorse for sending him away.

The idea that John’s gone, by my actions—my insecurities—my lack of forethought. And for the first time in over a year, I hate the solitude I once craved. But it’s done. John left. And he might never come back.