Bound by Darkness (Bound By Series)

16. Rusted Hinges

Chapter 16

Rusted Hinges

THALIA

Sitting on the slowly deflating couch, my foot tapped against the creaking floor as I watched the door for signs of movement—for any indication he was back. I planned to light a fire when Ivan walked through it for leaving me here with a man I hardly knew.

Well, at least a man I knew less than him.

Fin shifted against the chair as his fingers delicately flipped the pages of his leather-bound book, his cedar eyes roaming over the text in great sweeps.

Hours of faelight had crept into the room, illuminating bits of floating dust as it fell to the equally coated flooring and yet, he had not uttered one word to me. One syllable of why I sat on this couch alone.

Fin’s lips pursed together as he flipped the page, the edges crinkling with each turn. His hair was tied back in a sloppy bun, highlighting the hard angles of his cheekbones and youthful appearance. A few wrinkles creased his forehead, his smile lines barely apparent as strands of black hair curled around his temples. His pointed nose wrinkled as his lips curled into a frown.

Picking at a loose thread that would likely unravel the ancient couch, I tore my gaze from the silent statue to the spread of books cluttered on the floor, table, and bookshelf.

Well-loved and well-read, many were stained with bits of rouge and kohl. Some were yellow and faded; the corners ripped back to expose the crumbled pages beneath. Much like the book he read in his hands.

Picking one from the table between us, my fingers floated over the blue cover. A warrior dressed in fighting leathers occupied the majority of space, her golden hair spilling onto her shoulders and back like roaring flames. A jeweled crown rested on her temples as she focused on the mountainside behind her covered in bits of white.

Running my hands down the spine, the text jumbled into unfamiliar words and phrases beyond my basic knowledge.

“That’s a good choice.” His voice was light as he nodded his head toward it. “The woman on the cover is the main character. She spent most of her life locked away in prison, both physically and mentally, until she guided her homeland to victory.”

“Spoiler much?”

“Depends on your interest in the ending or the journey.”

“Ending,” I stated over him. “The journey is the most boring part of a book.”

“I’d disagree.” He flipped another page. “The journey teaches you character depth, realization, and the impact of the ending. The ending doesn’t make sense unless you study the journey.”

“Endings make perfect sense without the journey. I bet she fell in love, defeated the enemy, and regained her title and kingdom by the end.”

“Perhaps, but she also lost loved ones and gained knowledge into who she is.”

“That’s part of living. Understanding doesn’t change what she accomplished by the end.”

It never did. Even the stories mother used to read to me and Yeva were nothing more than nightmares appearing as dreams.

Fin scratched the stubble lining his jaw, a hint of mischief high in his voice. “You sound delightful to read with.”

I placed the book back on the table. It landed with a soft thud. “If it has unrealistic endings, it’s a boring book,” I said. “Speaking of boring.” My head jerked toward the door. “Did Ivan mention where he was going or when he’d be back?”

“Why would I actively seek out a conversation with him?” He laughed, but lightness did not reach most of it. “Trust me, I’m just as pissed as you are. You were both supposed to be out of my house already.”

“The feeling’s mutual.”

I wanted to leave this dust-infested place itching my nose every few seconds.

Fin’s fingers paused on the page. “What are you doing with him anyway? Given your level of disdain toward him, I assume you’re not intimate with him, but what’s in it for you? Your loyalty doesn’t make sense to a man of his… status.”

His words lit embers under my skin as I willed my fingers to remain stretched, even as they desperately wanted to curl against my palms. “It’s none of your business.” It was none of his business to know about the deal.

“Oh, but it is. You enter my home, use my bedroom, and sit on my couch. I have every right to know.”

“Bring your concerns to Ivan. He is my keeper, after all.” The words scorched my throat as I spoke them into existence. Despite our conversation last night, he still controlled much of my life.

“Hm,” he said, his brown eyes narrowing. “I don’t entirely believe you.” His nostrils flared as he assessed me the way Lord Haville had. “I smell death on you. You reek of its stench. Surprising for a half-breed.”

He inched forward, the slow movement alluring as a smile crossed his lips. “You’re a caster, aren’t you? The stench of death rots underneath your skin. The same way every caster I’ve ever encountered reeks of it. You’ve seen and tasted death’s vices, and it runs”—he pointed toward my neck— “in your blood, boiling you from the inside out.”

His hands pressed against the table at my silence. “What casting do you have?”

He had to have made a guess. There was no way he could smell the casting lingering in my body, right? “How do you know?” I asked, my eyes following his movements.

Fin shrugged. “You casters all give off a smell. Everyone thinks I’m crazy, but each one I meet smells like a rotting corpse.”

“Lovely,” I muttered.

His eyes flicked to me. “What casting do you have?” he asked again.

Swallowing, I spoke, “Dark.” My throat struggled to state the word I had so carefully hidden since birth.

Fin blinked, his face frozen as his hands gripped the table’s edge. “Impossible.” The sound was barely audible. “No one has that elemental casting. The only ones to possess that were the Fae gods, but they have all vanished.”

“You asked. I told you the answer,” I said as my eyes narrowed. He would not find weakness in them.

He seemed to mull over the statement, his brows furrowing into a deep arch until a look of shock appeared among his sharp features, his eyes widening. “Gods, you’re not—“ His words stopped as he gaped. “But it can’t be you. This… this changes everything. Everything about casting, about Cethales… about the war.”

It clicked, his face twisting into a tight line as he slumped back against the chair, his hair spilling from the messy bun in dark waves. “You’re her, the half-breed sentenced to prison, aren’t you? Because?—”

“That’s enough.” He needed to stop.

How was he so good at guessing? How were both of these men able to figure out my past in seconds when I barely knew myself?

He continued, delight shining in his eyes. “You’re a legend. Ivan collected you from the prison, didn’t he? And I bet he roped you into the war. What does he have on you? Money? A promise of a future? Perhaps someone?”

My eyes flashed with contempt, but it edged Fin further. His guess had been correct again. “You’re on a suicide mission.”

“I don’t have a choice.”

“The person you’re doing this for must be exceptional to throw away your life.”

“I’m not throwing away my life,” I snapped. “He’s the one chance I have at breaking back into Armas.”

“You want to go back to Armas? A place filled with psychic casters? You are suicidal.”

“Maybe, but it’s my deal. Your opinion doesn’t matter.”

He held up his hands. “I hear you, but I’ve worked with Ivan for years. He’s not as helpful as he seems,” he added. “I’m not sure what deal you made, but any deal with him is stupid.”

“Stupid deals are better than none.”

“Not when he’s going to kill you. Where’s he taking you anyway?”

My brows furrowed as my bones grated against each other. The words flowed from me, hot and heavy. “Laias.”

Fin stayed deadly silent, his knuckles white as he gripped the chair. “Laias?”

“Yeah.” My head angled at the lack of color on his face. Almost as white as the pieces of dust continually raining down on my skin.

“Why?” he commanded, the song-like lull to his voice gone.

“Ivan says there’s a possibility of an attack?—”

Fin stood, knocking over the books from the table as his knee slammed into it. He didn’t seem phased by the injury as he stormed over to the couch, his body lingering above mine.

“Tell me everything. Now,” he growled, the airiness in his voice replaced by a heaviness I hadn’t even seen Ivan use before.

“I don’t know much,” I said as I squared my shoulders. “He told me last night we are aiding Laias as the rebels are planning to attack. ”

“Fuck. Fuck ,” he repeated, his eyes black with rage and… a hidden sadness. “How long ago?”

“I don’t know.”

“How long ago?” he repeated, his face directly above mine. Pure terror shone back.

“I don’t know,” I spat, my neck hurting from the angle I had positioned myself into. “That’s all I know. I swear.”

“He knew. He had to have known for months.” His breathing grew ragged, feral even as he glared at me, the full brunt of his words seeping into my pores.

“What’s going on here?” Ivan stood at the door, his pack lazily slung across his shoulder. Clothing, medicine, and food parcels threatened to spill from the top. “What the hells is going on here?”

The pack slapped against the ground with an echoing thud in the silent house .

I took a deep gulp of air as Fin stepped back, the air lighter as he whipped toward Ivan.

“You good?” Ivan asked from the door, his eyes not moving from Fin.

“Yeah,” I said. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Laias?” Fin asked, kicking the books from his path. “When were you going to tell me about Laias?”

Ivan’s eyes flicked to me, and I avoided his gaze as I sank into the couch. Shame and guilt were growing in the pit of my stomach, acid bubbling beneath.

“Not your business.”

“Not my business?” he yelled, the veins in his neck popping. “You know I have important people there. We have important people there!”

“You abandoned those duties the minute you left the battlefield,” Ivan said. “I don’t owe you any explanations or information about war plans. You quit being my partner… my friend when you left them to rot.”

Fin fisted his hair as he stepped over the fallen books. “You are an absolute piece of shit,” he spat. “You’d seek her help? So what if she possesses elemental casting? She has no proper training and won’t be of any help to the people. She’s been in a prison !”

“At least she won’t run away,” Ivan snapped.

“She won’t be able to when she’s dead!” His eyes softened. “Do you even care what might happen to her?”

Ivan brushed Fin aside as his eyes met mine. “Grab your bag. We’re leaving.”

“That’s it? You’re still going to leave with her?”

“Grab your stuff. Now ,” Ivan repeated as he ignored him.

Fin stepped in front of him. “I’m going too.”

“No.”

Fin crossed his arms over his chest. “You can’t deny me this. They are indispensable to me, too. I’m not doing this for you. I’m doing this for them.”

A muscle ticked in Ivan’s jaw as he stared at Fin, resilience shining back at him. Ivan would not win this fight.

Even if he said no, Fin would tag along at the anger exuding from him.

A war waged in Ivan’s eyes before his mouth opened— “The horses,” he blurted. “You provide us with both of your horses in exchange for Laias.”

“Deal,” Fin said quickly.

“We leave in a few minutes. One wrong move and I’ll gift you the death you deserve.”

“Sure. You and I both know how well you keep promises. It’ll be a shame when she does the same to you.”

I opened my mouth to say something, but Fin walked away, the door to his room shutting.

Clearing my throat, I turned to Ivan.

“Don’t,” Ivan said, his fingers caressing the bridge of his nose. “You’ve already caused enough trouble.”

“How is this my fault? I thought you were grabbing supplies!”

“I was. I didn’t expect to return and find you’d loosened your lips. I figured he’d find out who you are, but when he’d ask, I believed you smart enough to keep your mouth shut,” he snipped. “I guess I was wrong.”

“Yeah, blame it on me,” I barked as my bones groaned and screamed from my boiling blood. “You were gone for hours , Ivan. How long does it take to grab a few items?”

“I went back to get you?—”

I stepped up to him, my arms outstretched as I shoved against leather, his words dying in the stale air. “You know what Fin also said while you were lounging around town? He told me you would break your deal. He told me you can’ t be trusted.”

“You’re going to believe him after everything I’ve sacrificed to get you here? After what we discussed last night?”

“I don’t care about your sacrifices! You should have left me alone.” Maybe it was the heat of the moment or maybe it was Fin’s words clinging to my head that had me verbally swinging.

Ivan’s jaw clenched tightly as he backed away, his lips pursed together. “Fine. Be outside in 10 minutes,” he said before closing the door shut behind him, the cream drapes billowing from the draft.

The three of us stared at the back of the house as a shingle fell to the ground, the rusted hinges swinging back and forth freely as neither acknowledged the other.

What a trio we made.

Fin shifted the weight of his bag on his back. “Well, this is awkward as hells.”

I gave him a quick nod in agreement as Ivan stared at the looming forest beyond the quaint town, his lips pursed together tightly. He had not spoken since the argument in the living room and from the way his shoulders and back were taut, he wouldn’t say anything for a while.

I didn’t mind it, honestly. Silence suited him best.

“Well, seeing as no one else is going to talk,” Fin muttered. “I guess I should mention the horses are ready.” He pointed toward the makeshift fence, pieces of wood sticking out of the wet grass like stakes. “Onyx and Beau.”

There were only two horses for three people.

Shit.

“You’ll have to share, seeing as the two of us won’t fit, and I would prefer not to cuddle next to him,” Fin said as he motioned between him and Ivan. “Potential opening for stabbings and all.”

I knew no logical way for them to ride together existed, but it still pissed me off to hear it. I’d have to ride with either one of them?—

“I want to ride with you,” I blurted, the words tumbling from my lips.

“With me?” Fin asked.

I nodded quickly, my hands wringing behind my back.

He raised his shoulders, his white button shirt rising above the buckle of his pants in a loose shrug. “Alright.”

Ivan’s face remained neutral beside me, but his hand gripped the fabric strap across his chest, his knuckles gleaming white.

Fin mounted Beau, the gorgeous horse with the brown coat. The smaller of the two. Beau stepped to me, her head nudging my arm gently.

Lifting my hand, her nose planted against it. A silent request as I ran my fingers over her smooth coat in long strokes, heat seeping into my hand. She neighed once, her hot breath tickling my palm as her kohl eyes met mine. I saw it then. A deep hurt mirroring mine.

“She’s an excellent horse,” Fin stated, his arm scratching beneath the braided locks. “She’s been through a lot, but she’ll make it a steady ride.”

His fingers spread enough for me to grab hold as he hauled me onto the saddle.

I adjusted slightly against the leather, angling myself forward onto the pommel to avoid unnecessary contact with the Fae male behind me. My efforts were rendered useless as he reached around me, his hands resting on my thighs as he gripped the leather reins.

His muscles flexed as he tugged on the leather straps, Beau turning in response.

“How badly do you want to piss him off?” Fin whispered in my ear as it tickled my slightly flushed skin from the summer air.

“What do you mean?” I whispered back, my eyes fixated on the mist drifting in and out from the tree line in waves.

“Do you want to get back at him? For what he’s made you do? Continues to make you do?”

My fingers ran over the hard leather. Is that what I was doing? Getting back at him for yelling at me? For spilling secrets I knew he had warned me to keep silent?

I knew I was in the wrong—for going against his advice, but the nagging feeling in my stomach remained as I said, “I’m listening.”

Fin’s chin rested against my shoulder as he whispered the sentence into my ear as Beau shifted.

“That’s—”

My gaze floated to Ivan’s. His jaw clenched tightly as his hands fisted the black reins. They turned a shade purple as he averted his eyes, and a twinge of guilt rested in my stomach.

“Ah, there it is.” Fin chuckled against my ear, bits of stubble scratching against it. “A man who does not like to share his property.”