Breaking through the Bond (Espen Jetties #2)

40. Hayes

40

HAYES

How was it possible for one person to fill my heart with so much love and also have it breaking for them?

Jamie was going through a lot. More than King and I ever knew. Signing those papers wouldn’t make him happy. That was what we wanted. Nothing else. I just worried that by him not signing them, he’d destroy any relationship he had with his dad. I didn’t want that for him. I knew what it was like to have no parents and it was brutal.

“What happens with your dad if you don’t sign?” I asked.

Jamie ran a hand down his face. “If I don’t sign these, he’ll push me to pick another one from his list. In his mind, if I’m not working a lowly computer job , then I should want to run a company of my own.”

“And if you tell him no? That you refuse to sign anything he brings you? That this isn’t the life you want?”

Jamie scoffed. “Then you don’t know my father very well. He doesn’t give up. He’s been at me my entire life about running my own business. He’s only ever seen MIT, the work I can do with computers, as a hobby. The fact that I waited until I was forty to take this step is unfathomable to him. Had I moved up through Equistris liked I’d always hoped, this wouldn’t even be a question.”

“We hate seeing you go through this,” King said. He put his hand on Jamie’s hip. King didn’t like seeing people he cared about upset. I could tell by the look on his face how much it was hurting him to see Jamie like this. “Like Hayes said, we only want you happy. Do you want to tell your dad no? From what I can tell he won’t take it well and then it could damage anything between the two of you. There are two choices, sign and let him rule your life. Because I have a feeling it won’t stop there if he’s this pushy about you buying a business. Or tell him to fuck off and do what you want.”

“Honestly, I’d rather not do either. I don’t want my dad to rule my life, but besides my choice of career, my dad has been nothing but supportive. He never even batted an eye when I came out, and his only concern with the three of us is that King loves the spotlight. I just wish he cared about what I really wanted.”

I came up on his other side and mimicked King with my hand on his hip. I needed to touch him, to feel him next to me. “You have a decision to make. We can’t make it for you, but we’ll be here with you every step of the way, no matter what you decide. But please remember, what matters in this is how you feel. What will make you smile. King and I get to do our dream jobs. We couldn’t imagine doing anything else. Not everyone is so lucky. You could be though. Whether you want to own this company, a different one, or build your own, you’re in control here. No matter what your dad says, it’s you who has to sign that paper. You who has the decision to make. No one else.”

Jamie glanced to the paper on the table then his eyes darted to the ground. “Everything I’ve ever built or designed has been something I was required to do or something I built for my own enjoyment. The games, Molly, they were all things I wanted. I wouldn’t even know where to start.”

“You have the time to figure it out. There’s nowhere you need to be. And we can help, although I don’t know how much good we’ll be.” I smiled. “We know hockey. Technology not so much.”

“Speak for yourself,” King cut in. “I can search porn with the best of them.”

“Ass.” I lightly shoved him. “We’re just trying to get you to smile, Jamie. This is a big decision and not one to make lightly. When did your dad say you have to sign the papers by?”

“He wanted me to sign them when I was in his lawyer’s office today. I only managed to bring them home because I told them I wanted to go through them one last time, when really, I wanted to drink and convince myself I was doing the right thing.”

“While drinking can be a good time, now isn’t one of them.” King glanced over to where the bottle sat on the table. “No more drinking until you decide one way or another. You need to do this with a clear head. Not one clouded by alcohol.”

Jamie stepped out of our reach and wandered over to the windows, hands in his pockets. “Even though I would have moved up through Equistris, I never wanted to run an entire corporation. I don’t want to sit behind a desk. I’ve always wanted to be hands-on. To create technology that can make people’s lives easier.”

“Then do that,” I suggested. “You don’t need to run a whole company to do so. Start with just you. Research. Figure out what you need to do to build this from the ground up. You can keep it small or make it as big as you want.”

Jamie turned to face us. “And you won’t care if it takes a shit ton of work to make it happen?”

“Nope,” King replied. “Keep in mind, Hayes and I travel a good chunk of the year. So, while we’re on the road, you can work your ass off here. And even when we’re home, we still have to bust our asses. We don’t have nine-to-five jobs. If you go this route, I think it could work well. You won’t be bored and missing our sweaty asses while we’re gone, and we won’t feel like complete shit for not always being here spending time with you.”

“He’s right,” I said. “I worry what it’s going to be like when we’re on the road. I don’t want our relationship to fall apart when you finally realize how busy we are when the season starts. This, right now, we get to see you every day. But that’s going to change. I don’t want you hating us because of it.” I didn’t want to think about things ending with him because of our careers. I wanted to hang on to Jamie with everything in me.

“If our time is going to be limited once the season starts and I figure out how in the hell to make any of this happen, it would be nice if we weren’t traveling from place to place. Would you both consider moving in here with me?”

“But… but…” I couldn’t get the words I wanted to say to exit my mouth.

Jamie wanted us to move in with him? I knew he loved King but he and I never said those words to each other.

“Are you sure?” I finally got out. “You want both of us to move in here? With you?”

Jamie walked over to me. “Of course I do. I hate the nights we spend apart.” He looked back and forth between the two of us. “Unless you don’t want to give up your condo. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed you’d want to come here.”

I stood stunned for a moment. Surely, if he wanted us to move in then he had to feel something for me, right? Something beyond lust and a strong like. But before I responded to him, I needed him to know how I felt.

“Jamie, we haven’t talked much about how you and I feel about each other. You and King say I love you often. Same with King and me. But me and you, we’ve never said it. I love you, Jamie. I don’t expect you to say it back. I just want you to know. Us moving in is a big deal but it feels right. I just don’t want to do it without you understanding the depth of my feelings.” I swallowed and glanced at King, who was smiling big but remained quiet, waiting to see what Jamie would say, just like me.

Jamie lifted his hand to my cheek and brought our lips together for a kiss. His eyes sparkled when he pulled back. “I love you too.”

“Awww,” I heard King say. Then he pushed in between us to get in on the kiss. “I love you too. Both of you.” He put his arms around us. “My men. And I’d sell that condo in a hot second if it means I get both of you every day. But Hayes will want to bring some of our furniture, if that’s okay. He likes the lived-in feel. Comforts of home and all that.”

I dropped my head. He was right. It wasn’t so much I didn’t like the modern lines of Jamie’s home. It was I missed the family feel. I missed the comfort I found at home when I first moved in with King. It was why we went shopping and bought stuff we both loved. Best of both worlds and all that. We could go shopping with Jamie or maybe he wouldn’t want to do that.

“We don’t have to if you don’t want to,” I murmured.

“As long as we don’t touch the game room, I honestly don’t care. I paid someone to design the rest of the house. If it didn’t have to do with technology, it didn’t interest me.”

“Thank you,” I whispered and leaned over to kiss him. “We’d love to move in with you.”

“Better do it before training camp,” King said. “We don’t want to deal with a move once shit gets started again. Is that okay with you?” he asked Jamie.

“Fine with me. It’ll give me something to be busy with while my dad stews over my latest career choice.”

“No matter what he says, we’re here for you,” I told him and gripped the back of his neck. “Always. You two are it for me. I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else.”

King kissed me. “Same, baby, same.”

“So, is it time for a drink now? One to celebrate? Or do either of you have any thoughts about what we should do with the rest of our evening?”

“Are you sure this is what you want?” I asked him. “To turn your dad down? I want you to be certain.”

“Do I want to have the conversation with him? No. Not in a million years. This is not going to go over well. Maybe I can bring Tim as my buffer. But I know signing those papers and buying some financial company, just to say I’m a CEO, will make me absolutely miserable for the rest of my life. I knew the two of you would be the light at the end of every shitty day, that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t hate every minute of being there.”

“We’ll be here when you get home.”

“In the nude with a bottle of vodka,” King added with a grin.

“That sounds perfect, but does that mean I have to wait until tomorrow for you to be naked with that bottle?”

“Absolutely not.” King walked over to the table and picked up the vodka. He took a swig and handed it to Jamie. “No glass needed.” Luckily, it was only half full.

Jamie took the bottle and tipped it back before handing it to me. “Now about those clothes…”

King stripped in record time. “How do you want me?” He looked between Jamie and me. “Ass up? You want me on the bottom? I’m not ready to get double dicked again. Wait, maybe you two should steer clear of that part of me for a few days. Jamie, do you want one of us to take you?”

Jamie reached down and popped the button of his dress pants. “I’m up for anything.”