Breakneck Hockey (Heartbreak Hockey #3)

5. Obsessed

Chapter 5

Obsessed

Casey

S utter’s fucking pissed about something that isn’t me for once, and I don’t even wanna know. We’re not fucking because we like each other. We’re fucking because we had a taste of the good drugs, and we liked them.

Drugs are bad. This is why you don’t do drugs, kids. They’re addictive. Painful. They’ll destroy your life.

My addiction to Sutter is the same reason he’s at my damn house with everybody home, knowing what we’re gonna do. I broke, okay? He hasn’t texted me in a few days. Before that, he’d been acting like he’d been bitten by a snake, and I was the only known antidote.

The way he sucked on my everything. I jerked off more than once thinking about it and then felt so damn naughty because I’d touched my dick and cum without Sutter’s permission. Hell, I went down a whole sex-induced coma of what it would be like to tell him how bad I’d been. What a brat I was because I’d disobeyed him. Yeah. Tell on my fucking self. Who does that? But I was gonna and it woulda led to some phenomenal sex.

It was a shock and a half to have him ghost me for days after living in a lust-filled haze with him. One day turned to two and two turned into a thousand for all I was concerned. I bitched about his negligence so hard the guys banned me from uttering his name more than ten times a day. I was the one who came up with the grand idea to go out with full intentions of finding someone other than Sutter to manhandle me.

I might have played coy when I got his text, but it made me salivate. My ass was no longer interested in finding anyone else’s dick. It needed his. I guess I could have met him at his house, but that would have taken longer. We weren’t downtown—where his apartment is—we were at a house party in Kitsilano where I live. On a desperate, primal-inspired whim, I told him to come to mine.

Instantly regretted it, of course, but when don’t I when it’s to do with Sutter?

I shut the door to my room, closing myself inside with a feral dog. He doesn’t wait, pushing me against the wall, mauling my mouth. Sutter sucks a large inhale and moans.

“Fuck, Alderchuck.”

I haven’t gotten over my need to punch him in the face, but my dick is a powerful negotiator telling me to “just hear him out” and “maybe rub against his leg a little”.

My dick is such a dick.

What we’re doing isn’t really kissing. It’s tasting. We’re trying to eat the flesh off each other without actually eating the flesh off each other. Fucking Sutter, tasting so damn good.

Gah! I wanted to yell at him at least a little for his rage sulking, but I’m too far down our self-made rabbit hole. I need him more than air. I only push back a little. I love going pliant for him for some reason. Especially, when he’s like this. Wild. Unstoppable. Besides, I can handle brutality. Live for it.

We rip each other’s clothes off and we’re both so damn horny we’re humping against each other, hard dicks sliding together. At least he seems to want me as much as I’ve wanted him.

“Get your mouth on my dick, Alderchuck.”

Fuck. That order goes straight to my groin, setting it on fire. I drop to my knees and swallow him whole. It’s a special talent of mine, and if he thinks he’s gonna find someone who can suck cock like I can elsewhere, he’s dreaming. Sutter’s got a hog of a dick, but my mouth can fit a lot. Bet he doesn’t find men who can take all of him that often.

I know I’m right. He lets loose a groan and his hips thrust on instinct rather than intent.

“That fucking mouth, Alderchuck. It’s so damn good. God, do I hate you for it.”

I pull off. “I can stop.” I let the smugness bleed off me. I’m not planning to stop, but it’s nice to get to tease his dick for once. It’s usually the other way around, him edging me until I’m crazy.

“Do I need to tie you to the bed?”

“You don’t have your fancy rope here, Sutter.” I looked up that rope he was using. Marine rope. That shit’s spendy.

“I’m fucking MacGyver, Alderchuck. I’ll find a way to tie your ass to this bed.”

Laughing, I swirl my tongue around the head of his dick and take him all the way in again. He fucks my mouth slowly but with hard thrusts that hit the back of my throat. So much saliva. A little choking. Tears run freely.

He cums down my throat with long cries, and I swallow him without spilling a drop, wiping the back of my arm against my lips.

“Come up here,” he says. Sutter kisses me some more with the taste of himself on my tongue. “Yep, I still taste watermelon.”

I roll my eyes. “Did that take the thorn out of your paw, dude?”

“No. Get on the bed. I’m not done with you yet.”

At least he admits there’s a thorn in his paw.

“I fucking hate you, Sutter,” I say, as I do what he says. Because I just know he’s gonna use his tongue somewhere and his tongue is better than watermelon Jolly Ranchers.

Yeah, I said that. Don’t tell him I said that.

I’m right. He spreads me wide, gripping under my knees, and his tongue slots into my pucker. Oh, sweet Jesus. It swirls over the wrinkles and tries to fit inside. All my nerve endings heighten. It’s a lot but not enough. Only enough to turn me needy and writhing.

“Don’t make me wait tonight, Sutter, please. You got off.”

He smiles against my asshole. “Doesn’t mean shit, Alderchuck.”

“You fucking sadist.”

“But what if you fucked me tonight?”

“Say what?”

I’m usually a proud power bottom—I’ve often been known to top from the bottom—but I’m not that way with Sutter, and I don’t want to give it up. It’s our exact power dynamic that I crave like sugar. I can let go enough with him to allow it, for some reason. I don’t even prefer to be in charge of sex or anything really. But I’ve never found someone, well, like Sutter, who seems to effortlessly dominate the fuck out of me.

Fucking, Sutter. Why does it have to be Sutter? It’s a grand universal prank.

“Don’t worry, I’m not handing over the reins to you. Being fucked feels good and I like it. I’ll still be owning your ass.”

Wow. Fuck, yeah. Don’t think I’ve tried that before.

Crack! His hand connects with my ass. “Good talk, Alderchuck. Now shut the fuck up.” He returns to eating me out. I would ask him what the fuck he’s doing if I’m gonna be fucking him, but it’s pretty damn obvious. He’s enjoying his work, delighted to take me apart.

Well, mission accomplished. That tongue. It’s something else. Wet. Hot. Knows just the right rhythm. Every sensation buzzes through my dick. It strains, leaking, getting ready to slide between Sutter’s greased-up cheeks. Fuck, that’s gonna feel good. Sutter has a nice ass.

His tongue’s gone. I whine. But it’s quickly replaced with a hand and a condom. He strokes and rolls the rubber down my shaft. Then there’s lube—so much lube—and my cock’s at his entrance.

“No prep for you?” I arch a brow.

“Your dick’ll open me. It’s how I like it.”

I shrug. Alright.

“Besides, it’s not like you’re me in the dick department or anything.”

I punch him in the ribs for that. He laughs. Yeah, yeah. My dick’s not the fat zucchini his is, but it ain’t small either.

He takes his time, working himself down my dick, slowly splitting himself on me, opening himself with my dick instead of fingers. Once he’s all the way on me, he pauses there, pressing his monster hands against my chest, looking to the ceiling for … something.

I’ve lost him. He’s somewhere else.

In the spirit of me, I thrust my hips. That brings him back, along with a murderous glare.

“No,” he says. “Hold fucking still.”

I get a good look at him from this vantage point. Sutter’s huge. A monster on skates. If I were to categorize him by dog, I’d have to go with rottweiler because of his tendency toward aggressiveness, but he’s also loyal. I’ve picked up on how committed he is to his friends, even if that doesn’t apply to me. Wait. The seventy-leven locks on his doors. He’s part Doberman, too. Protective. Sutter’s a Doberweiler.

He's also mean-looking until he smiles. Sutter’s always on guard, never resting from a vigilant perch in his mind.

Somehow that energy’s bleeding into me right now in a sexual way. Ownership. He owns me. At least he thinks he does, and I get why. I turn into needy puddy when I get near him.

He takes both my wrists in one hand, pinning them above my head and proceeds to fuck me with his ass. Fucking hell. My dick’s gonna feel this tomorrow like my ass would.

“You’re so tight, Sutter. Feel so fucking good.” I’m gonna cum quickly like this, but he slows down, reminding me that I’m not in charge of when I cum. He is. “Please. Please let me cum. I won’t even be a lippy little shit for once.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

He holds me in place with his mega grip. I’m all his. Trapped. Prey. His sex doll he’s using to get off.

“Okay,” his voice husks into my ear. “Cum, kitten.”

Sutter rides me through the most intense orgasm of my life and he shudders too, his ass trembling around mine. He falls to the side of me, on his back.

“What the fuck was that, Sutter?”

“I came from my ass.”

“Just your ass? Like, like an assgasm?” Nothing came out of his dick.

“Yeah, dude. Never had one? You’re missing out.”

I haven’t. But now I wanna. “Do it to me later,” I demand.

“Later,” he promises. “So? Who was in charge?”

I shouldn’t give him the satisfaction, but I want that again. Trapped beneath him. Owned and used like that.

“You. You’re a bossy asshole even when you’re taking my dick, Sutter.”

“Thank you for reminding me.” Huh? He reaches over the bed and returns with his phone.

“What are you doing?”

“You’re so fucking wrecked. Need this for my spank bank.”

“I don’t know whether that’s creepy or hot. No, I do. It’s both. Why do you need a photo album of me on your phone?” Posing for his weird-ass picture with two fingers shoved into my mouth isn’t gonna deter him, but fuck it. If I’m gonna be spank bank material, I’m gonna be fucking great material.

“Because I’ve gotta wean myself from your ass somehow.”

“Are these pictures the equivalent of a nicotine patch?” I sit up, looking for a towel before I remove the messy condom.

“Something like that.”

“I think we’re bubblegum,” I tell him, pulling the condom off, tossing it in the garbage can, wiping myself off.

“Bubblegum?”

“Yeah. Bubblegum is fucking awesome when it first hits your tastebuds. Best flavor adventure of your life. But ten seconds later? That’s when you lose the tang and spit it right in the trash. Then you pull a brand-new piece of bubblegum from your pocket.”

“Can’t believe you compared our fuck fests to bubblegum.”

“Show me the lie.”

He can’t. “Fine, Alderchuck. This is all just bubblegum and one day we’re gonna lose our flavor. I hope to fuck that it’s sooner than later because I’m already tired of your fucking nonsense.”

“Same. This is going to ruin my reputation. Do you know how many Ted Talks I’ve given about what an ass you are?”

“Sounds like you’ve devoted a lot of your time to talking about me.”

Fuck. That does make it sound like it’s all I do. My mind scrambles for the clever comeback that should be sitting in my arsenal, waiting for me to pluck it, but it’s not there. Sutter’s fault. He’s fucked me into submission.

“Nothing?” he says.

“I’m feeling generous. You deserve a little charity after a fuck like that. It was good, Sutter.”

I still win. He’s stunned to silence by the compliment.

Awkwardness sets in quickly. Beyond fucking, there’s nothing for us, and all the shit he does that I hate returns to the forefront, mad that Sutter’s in my bed at all. It’s time for him to go.

I’m about to tell him to get the fuck out and relish in it. But he swings his legs over the bed, sitting up, and whatever brought him here in a nasty mood’s gripped him again. He rubs hands over his face.

I fight instinct, keeping my mouth shut. If I don’t, I’ll ask him what’s wrong and we don’t do that. His shit is his shit; mine is mine. But it’s easy to see that he’s going through some shit. Ugh. Fuck me. My mom raised me to have too much empathy, even when it’s the world’s biggest asswipe going through something.

“Wanna watch a movie?”

“A movie?”

“Yeah. You promised me an assgasm, but I need food and a break before that can happen. No way am I holding a conversation with your ass until then. A movie’s a great way to ignore the fuck out of each other until then.”

His body lets go, releasing all the air pressurizing his insides.

“I swear to fuck, your stomach’s the third person in this situationship. Yeah, let’s do that. No way I’m talking to you either.”

I have a few oversized sweatshirts and jogging pants that just fit him. I toss on a t-shirt and a pair of pajama pants. He follows me into the kitchen, taking a seat at the island. The rest of the guys are still up, also in lounging clothes, a movie already playing. Dash is drowning in one of Stacy’s oversized sweatshirts. Stacey’s foot’s resting on his thigh, and he’s leaned against the arm with his eyes closed. It’s a long couch, but three of us on it’s a bit much. We usually squish ourselves onto it. Dirk’s on the other side, his foot rested on Dash’s other thigh. He’s the only one watching the movie, though. Dash is on his phone.

Dash and Dirk sneak a peek. I don’t know why it matters that they see me with him when they already know. It feels just as weird as I thought it would, and an odd sting of embarrassment burns my skin. Am I ashamed of my addiction to him? Yep. Am I willing to give it up, yet? No fucking way.

I take out four boxes of Kraft Dinner or as we Canadians affectionately call it, KD. Otherwise known as best mac ‘n’ cheese in the known universe.

“Oh, shit. Where are my manners? You want some, Sutter?”

He wrinkles his nose. “No way. Some of us care about our bodies.”

I shrug. “Suit yourself. Anyone else?”

“No!” sings the chorus.

Guess it’s just the four boxes then. I ignore Sutter from then on out, giving all my focus to making the perfect mac ‘n’ cheese. It’s an art form and if you do it wrong it tastes like shit.

“Didn’t know you were the Gordon Ramsey of KD, Alderchuck,” Sutter says.

I continue to ignore him, but he doesn’t like that, getting up to put his arms around me from behind. Sucking on my neck. I turn on him with my wooden spoon. “Sit your ass in that chair, or I’m kicking you the fuck out.”

He holds his hands up, biting his lip to keep from laughing. A few chuckles rise from the couch. They were probably waiting for me to go feral on Sutter. When I’m cooking, it’s do not fucking disturb.

I use the largest bowl we have to serve it up and pull a bottle of ketchup from the fridge. Sutter watches me, fascinated.

“Okay, fine. Gimme a bite, Alderchuck. You’re making it look good.”

I sit beside him at the kitchen island, placing my bowl down. “Forget it. You had your chance. We share dicks, not food.”

My brother groans from his sleep. “Please don’t talk about your dick when you’re three feet from me.”

“You were supposed to be asleep.”

I catch movement from my athlete-level periphery, but I’m too slow. Sutter’s arms trap me, and he wrenches the fork from my hand. I squirm and writhe but only break free after he’s stolen a hefty bite of my mac ‘n’ cheese. His cheeks puff. He’s smiling so hard it reaches his eyes.

That’s fucking better.

I don’t know why Sutter’s shit mood bothered me at all but guess it did.

And fuck. Watching him eat my KD does things to me. It’s the turn-on I didn’t know I needed. We may not have to wait for a whole movie before he introduces me to the world of assgasms, but I’m still making him watch at least half of the first Back to the Future movie with me.

Goosebumps wave over my flesh. “I haven’t added the ketchup yet. Maybe another bite, with ketchup, yeah?” I breathe.

He gets real close to my ear. “This is turning you on.”

It’s not a question. “So, so much.”

“Guess we have to mark down food fetish for you,” he whispers as if it’s our little secret.

He forks another bite of my mac ‘n’ cheese and I’m letting him steal my food—chest bubbling, but it’s worth it. What’s he gonna do?

Ketchup. He adds the fucking ketchup, opening his mouth wide for a large bite. I catch the minute nose wrinkle. Huh, guess he doesn’t like ketchup on his mac ‘n’ cheese, but he’s going through with this for the sake of turning me on.

Do I have to count that as sweet in a Sutter-ish kind of way?

Nah. He just wants to plow me.

It works. “What do you say we skip the movie and take this back to my room?” I suggest.

“I need to bleach my brain,” Dirk complains. “I accidentally witnessed that shitshow. I do not kink shame, but I also don’t need to see it. I vote take it to your room. All in favor, say aye.”

There’s a chorus of aye’s, even from Stacey who can’t know what’s going on. He’s mostly asleep.

Sutter and I laugh. “C’mon.” I grab the bowl of KD.

“Wait,” he says. He snags the bottle of ketchup off the counter. “I just got seven dirty ideas and they all involve ketchup.”

Okay, even I can admit it. The two of us are seriously fucked, but am I gonna avidly participate in every one of those dirty ideas no matter what they are? Yes. Yes, I fucking am.