Briar Valley: The Complete Duet

1. Willow

CHAPTER 1

WILLOW

RIDICULOUS THOUGHTS – THE CRANBERRIES

Tucking my short black hair into a worn baseball cap, I slide a big pair of sunglasses on then check my reflection in the rearview mirror. I’m well-disguised.

The pale blue sweater I’m wearing is loose, hiding my slimmed-down body. Eating isn’t something I manage much of these days. I’d probably starve if Arianna didn’t need to be fed.

Once a week, I brave the trip to the local supermarket, leaving Arianna safely behind. I have no choice but to leave her alone. It’s a risk, but so is breathing while Mr Sanchez still roams free.

Shaking out my hands, I switch off the car engine then recheck the handful of notes that Katie passed over yesterday in an envelope. It’s enough to get us through this week.

“Just go inside,” I whisper under my breath. “He isn’t here. Walk in there, and do what you need to do.”

Sliding my hand in my pocket, I finger the sharp switchblade. Mr Sanchez has proven that he can still reach me, even here in England, far from the darkness of his mansion.

Nowhere is safe for us.

Not anymore.

The news stories about our disappearance are relentless as he continues his savage campaign to discredit me by any means necessary.

I’m the evil, unstable mother who kidnapped her daughter and left the golden boy of the real estate business high and dry. The entire world hates my guts, and they don’t even know me.

Grabbing a shopping trolley, I keep my chin tucked down and walk into the supermarket as casually as possible. My grip on the trolley is white-knuckled.

The security guard spares me a glance, frowning ever so slightly, but he soon turns his attention to the next shopper. I blow out a heavy breath, repeating my inner-mantra.

Breathe, Willow.

In and out.

Get it done.

I keep my baseball cap and sunglasses in place even inside the supermarket, offering me some sense of protection. I’d rather look like a lunatic than risk being spotted.

By halfway through the weekly shop, my palms are slick with nervous sweat, and I’m itching to run at full speed as far away from this place as possible.

Every person who walks past causes me to freeze, then I have to mentally dig myself back out of a hole of panic to keep walking.

When the cheap burner phone in my pocket vibrates, I let out a shuddered breath before answering the phone call. She’s never a second late for our scheduled calls.

“Hey, Grams.”

“Willow.” Lola sighs in relief. “It’s so good to hear your voice.”

“It’s the same voice you spoke to last week and the week before.” I grab a bottle of juice. “How is everything? Are you okay?”

“We’re all fine,” she answers vaguely.

“What’s happening in Briar Valley?”

“The first snow fall came a few days ago. Albie is outside gritting the road as we speak. You should have seen the kids, all screaming and running around.”

I smile to myself. “Sounds lovely.”

“It was. How’s the weather there?”

“It’s cold here, but no snow. Arianna keeps waiting with her nose pressed against the window. She’s determined to see it for the first time, but I don’t think we’re far enough into the countryside.”

Lola sniffles, and I know she’s started to cry. She rarely gets through one of our scheduled chats without shedding tears. The last five months have taken a heavy toll on us all.

Tucking the phone against my shoulder, I reach over an older gentleman to grab some fresh bread, stacking it on top of the canned goods that I also picked up.

“I’m sorry,” Lola says. “It’s just… we miss you both so much. It isn’t the same here without you. The town feels so empty.”

“You spent two decades without me,” I remind her. “I know it’s hard. This isn’t easy for us either, but you know that I have no other choice. It wasn’t safe to stay.”

“I know… it just doesn’t make it any easier. It’s been months, Willow. Surely it’s safe for you to come home now?”

“He’s still on the news every single night appealing for information,” I grit out. “That isn’t safe, and you know it. Not while the world believes the lies he’s spent months spouting.”

Lola clears her throat. “Perhaps one day it will be safe again. I wish we knew when that day will come, though.”

Agony lances across my chest as I battle to remain strong for her sake. My tears are only allowed to make an appearance when I’m alone. I have to be a mum first—strong and unwavering.

“How are…?” I hesitate, swallowing hard. “The guys?”

“They’re alive, poppet.”

“That bad?”

“I won’t lie to you and pretend like everything is fine when it isn’t. They’re hanging by a thread, much like I’m sure you are.”

The backs of my eyes burn, and I clamp my hands into fists until my nails dig into my palms. I have to keep my anguish at bay. I can’t afford to fall apart here. It isn’t safe.

“Micah crashed Killian’s truck last week,” Lola reveals. “He knocked over a lamppost.”

“He crashed the truck? What was he even doing driving it?”

“He was drunk,” Lola admits.

My heart seizes, freezing into a lump of solid ice, impenetrable and alone on a mountain of misery. I’m stranded in a barren wasteland, without them to hold me close.

“Micah’s drinking again?” I ask in a low, broken voice.

“Forget I said anything.”

“Grams—”

“How is Arianna? Do you need anything?”

“Don’t do that. I need to know. How bad is it?”

Heading towards the checkout counter, I freeze when someone stops in front of me. I make myself take a breath when panic grips my throat. It’s just another shopper. They don’t even spare me a glance.

“He’s hurting, Willow.”

A bubble of anxiety lodges itself in my throat. “What about Killian and Zach? Aren’t they helping him?”

“They have their own feelings about your departure to contend with, sweetheart.”

“I see.”

If not even Zach is capable of staging an intervention for Micah right now, things are worse than I’d feared. I’ve broken them all.

“I wish I could tell you something better, but the fact is, the longer you’re away… the more it breaks them. I’m starting to think they’ve given up hope of ever seeing you again.”

Leaning against the cart, I cover my mouth with my spare hand, grateful for the sunglasses covering my streaming eyes. Not even my public surroundings can hold the tears back now.

“Willow? You still there?”

“I’m here,” I choke out.

“I didn’t mean to upset you. Let’s talk about something else. Do you need more money? I want to help you.”

“Katie… Um, she gave us some cash. We’re fine. I don’t need your help.”

“Please,” Lola begs. “You don’t have to do this on your own.”

I let out a strangled laugh. “I am on my own. Just like I always have been.”

“You’re not. Maybe it’s time to come home. These news stories, it’s all bullshit. He can’t hurt you, and you can’t keep running forever. You have to face this monster sometime.”

“I can’t do that.”

“This plan is doing more harm than good now.”

“It isn’t safe. I can’t come back until it is.”

“This investigation could take years,” Lola argues. “What are you going to do? Hide until it’s all over?”

Composing myself, I resume pushing the trolley with one hand. “Katie told you, then. So much for privacy.”

“Ethan wants to help you, poppet. He’s a good man. The entire team at Sabre Security is very capable. They can help.”

“I wasn’t trafficked, Lola,” I whisper in a fierce voice. “He was my husband and an abusive asshole.”

“You’re in denial. You have to face this.”

“Denial? Seriously? Give me a break.”

“Come home,” Lola demands. “It’s been five months. Dimitri Sanchez has slinked back to his shady corner of the globe and long since stopped checking if you’ve come back to Briar Valley.”

“That doesn’t mean he won’t check again at any moment and threaten you all to get to me. I can’t let that happen, Grams.”

“Please… Just come home.”

I swallow the scream attempting to claw up my throat. “I’m sorry, but I can’t stop running until he’s dead or behind bars. I’m not discussing this anymore.”

“Willow, wait?—”

Hanging up the call and switching off the phone with numb hands, I feel like the floor is caving in beneath me. Those damned words have echoed in my brain since Katie’s visit.

Human trafficking.

Lola’s right… I’m burying my head in the sand and feeding myself a pack of lies to scrape together whatever shallow comfort I can find. It isn’t working, but I’m out of options here.

Checking out on autopilot, I stuff groceries into bags at random. My mind is too busy yelling and going into self-destruct mode.

It’s not safe.

You have to run.

Arianna’s at risk.

The cashier gives me an odd look when I smack my fist into my forehead and whimper under my breath. I barely manage to hand over a stack of cash, my hands are shaking so badly.

All I can think about is getting back inside the safety of the old, beaten-up car outside that Katie lent us. After randomly throwing bags in the boot, I climb into the driver’s seat and slam all the locks on.

Only then do I let myself crumble completely, slumped over the steering wheel as my lungs wheeze and struggle for air. My vision is fuzzy from a lack of oxygen as a panic attack seizes me.

In my mind, a deep, grumpy voice takes over. Previously, Mr Sanchez taunted me, but now another man haunts my darkest moments. His absence delivers the worst pain imaginable.

Picturing Killian’s familiar, fire-lit eyes, his mouth curved down in a scowl, I imagine him whispering to me.

Just breathe, princess.

In and out.

I’ve got you.

“I miss you so fucking much,” I cry, my cheeks stinging with tears. “I never should’ve left. I hate myself for hurting you all.”

Searching for the lump of cool steel still resting in my coat pocket, I clutch the switchblade in my trembling hand, choking on endless sobs.

In these moments… Micah always comes to me too. Staring into my eyes with those forest-coloured orbs of pure intelligence, he offers me a tiny smile, just like he did when he found me bleeding all those months ago in the bathtub.

You don’t need to hurt yourself anymore.

You’re not alone.

“I’m alone, and I deserve to be.”

You made a promise.

Please don’t do this to yourself.

“This is all I have left, Mi.”

Blocking out his imaginary voice, I flick out the blade and roll up the sleeve of my sweater. New, shiny scars mark my skin. Anxiety is a fucking bitch, and I’m a slave to it now more than ever.

This is the only thing that gives me the strength to plaster a smile on in front of Arianna and be the best parent I can be despite all this carnage.

Even though every time I cut myself to cope, I feel like I’m failing Arianna and failing myself too. It’s the single source of control I have left as we freefall through our destroyed lives.

Dragging the blade across my arm, I release a long breath, tasting the relief of oxygen at last. Warm blood runs down to my elbow, and I quickly grab a pack of tissues from my handbag.

We’re not living, stuck here in limbo. I’m existing for Arianna yet failing her all at once. What if Lola’s right? Is this the worst mistake of my entire life? Have I doomed us all?

Shaking my head, I wipe my eyes then roll my sweater down to hide the fresh cuts. I have to go home. One foot in front of the other. That’s how I survived before, and it’s how I’ll do it again.

Finding that awful, empty space that kept me going for ten long years, I’ll continue to float there, inches from drowning, until someone comes along and pulls me out again.