Cabin Fever With My First Flame (Sweet Christmas Kisses)

1. Bailey

Chapter one

Bailey

“Mom, If I have to listen to one more Christmas song on this trip, I’m going to pull out my hair and end up looking like Uncle Baxter,” my oldest daughter, Ella, says dramatically as she reaches for the radio controls to change the channel. I’ll be the first to admit that my brother, Baxter, is a bit thin on top, but he’s a far cry from being bald.

I smack her hand away and give my 14-year-old the stink eye, refusing to listen to K-pop or another Disney actress-turned-pop star. “As pilot of this ship, radio controls belong to me, Miss Thang. When you have your own car, you can play whatever you want. Besides, Christmas music is the ‘bomb diggity,’ and I get to listen to it for only one month out of the year.”

Ella folds her arms across her chest, staring out the window and watching the snow that is starting to fall in earnest now. It’s coming down heavy enough that I’m becoming concerned. “Don’t pretend that you haven’t been listening to it since July, Mom. And what is ‘bomb diggity,’ anyway? Who talks like that?”

We’re driving on a winding backroad that leads into my hometown of Lake George, New York—a small tourist village that boasts picturesque views and amazing skiing this time of year. It also boasts two-lane highways butted up against a mountain with blind curves and a cliff. I grimace as the lines in the road start slowly disappearing under a blanket of white fluff and use my daughter’s question as a distraction from my fraying nerves. The last thing I need is for Ella to see me panic.

“Oh, forgive me. You kids say, ‘It’s slay,’ now. How could I forget?” My sarcasm doesn’t go unnoticed by Ella, who is the spitting image of me when I was a teenager. She has the same long, blond hair and large, blue eyes that stare back at me every day, but the similarities don’t stop there. Ella also has my spit-fire personality and a mouth that gets her in trouble—like right now.

She turns her head slowly in my direction and leans away from me, a slow smile forming on her lips. “Because you’re old .”

“I’m 35! That’s not old!” I retort, falling into her trap. Ella takes great pride in trying to get a reaction from me, and I hate to say it, but she succeeds more often than she fails.

“Well, you drive like you’re old. At this rate, I can get out and walk to Nana’s faster. Want me to drive?” Ella asks hopefully.

I bark out a laugh that Ella doesn’t find amusing in the slightest. “You’re 14 and have two more years before you can drive. No, Sweetheart, you get to be my passenger princess for a little while longer.” I glance over my shoulder at my other two princesses, Ava and Mia, who are sleeping soundly in the jump seats of my food truck.

“Dad would let me drive. He’s done it before,” Ella says with her lower lip turned out. She’s trying to pit me against her father, but that’s one trap I don’t fall for. I may not be in love with Daniel anymore, but I’ll never say a bad word about him to our kids. It doesn’t matter that he cheated on me, sold our restaurant, and ran away with the hostess. His relationship with our daughters is between him and them, and his actions will speak for themselves. I’ll be there to help pick up the pieces when he inevitably breaks our daughters’ hearts, even if I pray every day that’s not what happens.

I grip the steering wheel almost to the point where my knuckles are as white as the ground outside. “Ella, when you visit your dad for the summer, then you can ask him to let you drive. I’ll even promise to give you some driving lessons when the snow melts. But now is not the time. We’re in the middle of the snowstorm that wasn’t supposed to hit until tomorrow, and I can barely see the road.”

Ella senses the tension in my voice and knows that it’s time to hold back on the snark. She’s quiet for a long time, which basically means she lasts until the end of “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by Andy Williams. Four minutes must feel like forever for a teenage girl with a lot on her mind.

“Mom, do you think that you’ll ever get married again?” Ella asks hesitantly. “Or do you believe that true love only comes around once?”

My poor baby left behind her first and only boyfriend back in Myrtle Beach, along with all of her friends. She’s feeling the loss of them as much as she is the loss of her father. I reach over as far as my seatbelt will let me and hold out my hand. Instead of joining our palms together, she gives me a ‘low five’ and then points toward the road.

Returning my eyes so that they’re focused out the front window, I tell her, “Yes, Ella, I believe that true love comes around more than once. Believe it or not, I’ve loved two men in my life. As for getting married again, I honestly don’t know. If love finds me a third time, I’m open to it. If it doesn’t, I’m okay with that, too.”

“Is Finn the guy you loved before Dad?” Ella asks, throwing me completely off guard. I can’t remember a single time that I’ve ever mentioned Finn since he left me back in high school, and I know for a fact I never brought up his name around the girls.

“Uh. Um. How do you know about Finn? Did your father say something to you?” My parents wouldn’t have said anything because they knew that Finn Hollister was a topic that was always off-limits in our household. As once my high school sweetheart and Daniel’s best friend, Finn didn’t just leave me. He left us both.

She shakes her head, but then nods. “Dad didn’t say anything to me directly. I overheard him talking on the phone with his friend, Bryce. He told Bryce to keep you away from Finn since your paths are bound to cross.”

“What? Why would he…” I’m interrupted by a slight rumble in the truck and a lurching motion that warrants my full attention. I glance down at the gas gauge, which is still showing half a tank. I frown. It’s in the same position as when we passed through Albany a few hours back, and I can’t help but wonder how long it’s been stuck.

“Is everything okay?” Ella asks worriedly.

“Maybe,” I say, tapping the glass on my dashboard. “The gas gauge is stuck, and I don’t know how long it’s been like that. We’re seven miles from Pop’s and Nana’s place, so if I can make it to the top of the hill, we can coast down the other side, right into town,” I say, spewing my thoughts out loud.

“We should have filled up in Albany,” my daughter says unhelpfully.

She’s not wrong. Regardless, I didn’t have enough cash left to purchase a full tank and the credit cards are maxed. Prior to the divorce, Daniel sold our restaurant and paid off the mortgage on the house. He planned to offer me the food truck in exchange for him getting to keep our home. Thankfully, the truck was in my parents’ name, and the judge mandated that either the house be sold or that Daniel buy me out. With the sale still pending, I’ll have to wait for my half.

After the final turn, I can see the crest of the hill up ahead. I channel my “Little Engine Who Could” and mutter out a chant, “I think I can. I think I can. I think I can.” When the truck sputters and comes to a stop less than 50 feet from the top, I bang my forehead against the steering wheel. “I guess I can’t.”

Refusing to go into full-blown panic mode, I pull out my phone and check to see if I have any bars in the right-hand corner. Reception in the Adirondack mountains is spotty at best, but with heavy snowfall and ominous clouds overhead, it would be a miracle if I could even get a text through. The “SOS” is prominently displayed where the stair-stepping bars should be, so I hold the side and volume buttons to access emergency services. The call doesn’t go through, and I’m forced to use the satellite feature to get routed.

When the dispatcher answers, I explain the situation and give her my location. I also inform her that I have three children with me, hoping to be bumped up on the priority list. She reassures me that help is on the way, but it could take up to a few hours. “Sit tight, and don’t venture out. There’s a blizzard passing through the area, and it is expected to drop seven to ten feet of snow,” the friendly dispatcher tells me.

When I hang up the phone, Ella gazes at me with frightened eyes. “It’s going to be all right, Sweetheart,” I say, unbuckling and pulling her into a motherly embrace. “Snow in this area is not uncommon, and people need to be rescued all the time. We have sleeping bags in the back to stay warm, plenty of food and water, and the new cold-weather gear Nana sent you girls for this trip. Let’s be grateful to God we have shelter in this storm.”

Ella nods. Mia and Ava both wake up now that the vehicle has come to a stop and the temperatures inside are slowly dropping. It’s no surprise that both girls have to pee, so I dig around in the back of the truck through our belongings to find a bucket. While Mia is on the makeshift potty, Ella asks more about Finn.

“Why did you and Finn break up in high school?” Ella asks.

“It’s a long story, Ella. Maybe another time,” I reply, darting my eyes between Ava and Mia.

She waves her hand toward the front window where the snow is well over a foot deep, and a plow has yet to come by. “It’s not like we’re going anywhere, and we have the time.”

I sigh. “It’s not that big of a deal, Ella. Finn was a year older than me and a grade ahead. When he graduated, he went to Buffalo to train as a firefighter. He was supposed to be gone for six months and then come back for me. Our plan was to get married when I graduated. I waited for him, but six months turned into a year, and there was no sign of Finn. The calls slowly stopped coming until I received a letter in the mail saying he was moving to California to fight the wildfires—without me.”

My six-year-old daughter, Ava, comes over and sits in my lap, asking where we are. I tell her that we ran out of gas and that there are knights in shining armor coming to rescue us. Ava giggles, but ten-year-old Mia is less enthusiastic about our impromptu camping trip. Pulling up her pants, she comes over and sits crisscross on the floor next to Ella. “What happened next? Is that when you fell in love with Dad?”

I nod. “With Finn, I loved him from the moment he moved to town my freshman year. Our chemistry was off the charts, and we were inseparable for those three years before he left. Your dad was his best friend, and the three of us always hung out together. So, when Finn never came back, the friendship between your dad and I grew into something more. We dated for a couple of years, fell in love, and then got married.”

Ella’s eyes twinkle with mischief. “So, Finn was the hot firefighter who burned you, and Dad was the rebound guy. Any regrets about not chasing after Finn after everything that has happened between you and Dad?”

I narrow my eyes at Ella. “I can always count on you to call it like you see it, Ella. However, I wouldn’t have put it quite that way. I loved your father very much. I never saw your father as a rebound, and our relationship took time to develop. My love for Finn was instant and intense. My love for your father grew from friendship. I loved them differently, but no less than with all my heart. I have no regrets, especially since God gave me the three of you. I wouldn’t change a thing.”

We have a group hug before Ella sits back on her haunches. “Do you think you might run into Finn? How cool would that be to get a second chance?”

I shake my head adamantly. “Finn lives in California, Sweetie. There’s not a chance…”

Ahh! My girls scream in unison when a man in a black ski mask begins pounding on the window, but I can’t get a good look at him from my position. “We’re here to rescue you, miladies. We got a call that you were in need of assistance.”

Three more sets of eyes hidden behind neon-colored ski masks peer at us from over the hood of the truck. The person wearing the bright yellow ski mask rolls his eyes. I can’t see his face, but I get the feeling he can’t be older than 15 or 16. He waves us over and then points to two quad runners that each seat four people. “We’re your ride. Grab your stuff, and let’s go.”

I give him a grateful smile and then make sure each of the girls is bundled up in their new coats, boots, scarves, hats, and gloves. They each have a backpack with a few changes of clothes and basic toiletries. The wind is picking up, and the visibility is getting closer to zero with every passing second.

I wrap a scarf around my face before opening the door and falling knee-deep in fresh powder. The man doesn’t bother to look at me as he hastily helps each of the girls and gets them settled into the back of the quad runners. When he comes back to give me an assist, he stops in his tracks, and his eyes widen in surprise.

I turn around to see what has caught his attention, wondering if there is a bear behind me. When I see nothing, I shrug and move past him, taking the last available seat in the ATV. When he hops into the driver’s seat, I tap him on the shoulder and give him the address that we’re staying at in town.

“No can do,” he replies. “Visibility will be zero within the next ten minutes, and it’s too dangerous to stay out here in the middle of a blizzard. Our cabin is on the other side of the hill, less than a mile away. You and your girls will be safe with us while we ride out the storm. Don’t worry, Bailey Bug. You’re in good hands.”

Bailey Bug ? Only one person has ever called me that.

“Finn?”