Calamity Rayne Knocked Up (Calamity Rayne #4)

23. That’s Not a Red Rider BB Gun

That’s Not a Red Rider BB Gun

M y mom and I did all the Christmas cooking, which meant the food would be mediocre at best. But dinner tasted like childhood and brought back memories. And, for that, I was happy.

I wasn’t sure what Hale said to Remington, but he was there. He came over Christmas morning with a reasonable amount of gifts that didn’t outshine Santa, and managed to keep his commentary to a minimum.

I wanted to avoid a tit-for-tat gift-off in which the men tried to outdo each other. I would not let my daughter’s personality pay the price for their competitive spoiling. She already lived the life of a toddler princess in extreme privilege. As her mother, I felt it was my job to set boundaries and keep her grounded.

Hale didn’t hold the same concern I did about things like that. He simply accepted that it was the top one percent’s right to live a life built entirely around excessive luxury. But I stood my ground because I didn’t want my kids to grow up as an entitled little assholes.

Some privilege I’d allow, but I still wanted Elara’s upbringing to resemble mine. There could be a car when they turned sixteen, but nothing over the top. She would only need something dependable and safe to get her to work, because my kid was going to have a job. I didn’t care how big her trust fund was. Employment gave a person a greater purpose, and I wanted her to learn the value of a hard day’s work.

Birthdays would be reserved for the family unless it was a milestone year—double digits, turning into a teen, sweet sixteen, eighteen, and of course, twenty-one. Filler years would be reserved for classroom cupcakes, random sleepovers, and casual picnics around the pool. There would be no private chefs, yacht galas, island excursions, or ski resorts in Aspen. Not for my babies .

These were not pressing concerns of Hale’s, but they were the thoughts that kept me up at night while I was growing a human in my womb. Other mothers in Davenport’s social circle were already whispering about waiting lists for private pre-K academies and middle-grade prep-schools.

One woman at a function mentioned her son’s private tutor. She expected him to be multilingual in four languages and fluent before age five. I told her that Elara figured out Blue’s clue almost every single time.

She wasn’t impressed. But I was.

As I carried out a tray of mangled sugar cookies Elara and I made, I walked them around the table to each guest so Elara could hand them out. She was so proud of her work and happy to share her cookies with those she loved.

“Did you make these, Meyers?” Remington frowned at the lopsided confection

“Elara and I did.”

He smiled at his granddaughter. “Thank you, angel.”

“Eat it, Pop-Pop.” She pushed his hand toward his mouth, forcing him to take a bite.

“Mmm,” he said, looking up at me with concern. “Is there milk?”

My mom carried out a tray of milk and coffee. Marta served a red velvet cake she made, which—I’m not gonna lie—totally overshadowed our cookies.

After supper, we moved to the den and watched A Christmas Story. The Davenports didn’t understand our affinity with the movie, and Barrett earned the stink eye when he called it stupid.

I survived countless fundraisers, balls, auctions, elaborate dinner parties, and mind-numbing business functions for these people. They would stomach my cheesy Christmas traditions -- even if they had to choke them down one dry swallow at a time.

Hale lifted my socked feet onto his lap and massaged my swollen ankles as I watched Ralphie suck on a bar of soap. To this day, the movie made me laugh.

Marta fussed over Elara’s new toys, as she showed them off to her. Remington and my mother chatted quietly in the dining room while Seraphina texted friends and updated her social media with holiday selfies.

There were no outsiders. Only us. And, for once, things seemed imperfectly perfect.

When the movie ended, everyone said goodnight. I forced leftovers on Remington, which confused him, so he handed them off to Marta with a mumble about being mistaken for a food bank.

“Thank you, Ni?a, ” Marta said, accepting the doggy bag of cookies and ham then kissing me on my cheek. “You did a beautiful job. And,” she pinched my cheek, “everyone was civil.”

I smiled. Small victories shaped big changes.

My mother took Elara up for a bath and when the house was finally empty and silent, I collapsed on the couch with a satisfied sigh. I was exhausted.

“Do you regret not letting me hire a chef?”

“No,” I said stubbornly grateful for the ache in my back and the soreness of my feet. “This was perfect.”

Hale gathered up some plates and cups and carried them to the kitchen. He returned with a long, Tiffany blue gift box. “I have one more gift for you.”

“Hale…”

He sat beside me and placed it on my lap. “Open it.”

I pulled the satin ribbon, and he lifted the lid. “ Oh my gosh.”

A vine of diamonds twinkled from a bed of black velvet. He pulled the necklace from the box and draped it around my neck, closing the clasp and sending shivers down my spine. I ran my hand over the diamonds and looked up at him lovingly.

“Thank you.”

He kissed my temple and hugged me close. “Merry Christmas, baby.”

After Christmas, things were quiet. That lingering magic slowly faded as the cookies disappeared and the garland yellowed, but I refused to pack up the holiday until after the New Year.

We watched the fireworks over Times Square from the penthouse of The Plaza as the ball dropped. Elara loved the sparkles and cheered every time one exploded in the sky. By twelve o’five, I was in bed and half asleep.

When we returned to the Keys, the holiday décor was packed away, and the house felt empty.

“What’s that smell?” I sniffed the air. Pregnancy had given me a bloodhound’s sense of smell.

Hale set down our bags and sniffed the air. “I don’t smell anything.”

“It’s like…” I sniffed again. “Paint.”

“Hmm. Where’s it coming from?”

I waddled to the staircase, following my nose as the scent grew stronger. “Upstairs, I think. Did you have painters come to the house while we were gone?”

He followed me up the steps. The smell was coming from the spare room. Elara ran ahead and disappeared into her playroom. I pushed open the guestroom door and stilled.

“Hale... What did you do?”

He watched my response cautiously. “Do you like it?”

The room had been transformed into a baby boho sanctuary. Natural wood furniture blended perfectly with the neutral walls painted in white and beige. Tropical plants formed an awning in the corner over a bamboo glider with a big cushion and ottoman. Darling designer clothing items hung from the bar in the closet, and wooden baskets overflowed with rattles and bottles.

It was a haven. “I love it.”

“Here, Mommy.”

I looked down at Elara and frowned as she held out a cupcake. “Oh, careful, Peanut. You can’t have food in here.” I took the cupcake out of her little hand. “Wait. Where did she get a cupcake? ”

“Aunt Phina!” She pointed to the door.

I looked up at Hale suspiciously. “Is your sister here?” We had just left her in New York, so that didn’t make sense. I followed Elara into the hall when Hale stayed silent.

“Surprise!”

I staggered back into Hale’s chest. Andrew, my mother, Hale’s mother, Seraphina, Marta, and Tyler clustered outside of the new nursery. “What are you guys doing here?”

“It’s your baby shower, silly,” Phina announced.

I looked down the hall, but the house seemed otherwise empty. I’d been expecting some over-the-top nightmare for a baby shower, but these were my people. “It’s just you guys?”

“Just us. Well, there’s one other person, but we think you’ll be happy to see her.”

Her? My stomach knotted, and I shot Tyler a paranoid glance, fearful they might have invited Elle. It had been a difficult but healthy choice to cut her out of my life, and I wasn’t looking for a reunion.

Tyler shook his head and looped his arm through mine. “Trust me, you’ll be happy.”

We walked into the guestroom, which had been transformed with flowers and balloons. The sight brought tears to my eyes. “You guys!”

Baked goods spread across a dressed table like a scene in Alice in Wonderland, and the bed had been adorned with piles of ruffly pillows to resemble a throne.

“Hello, Rayne.” Willow crossed the room with angelic grace and hugged me. “You look wonderful.”

“Was this why I couldn’t get an appointment with you yesterday when we were in New York?”

She laughed. “I knew I’d see you soon enough.”

I was truly surprised. “I can’t believe you’re here! I can’t believe any of you are here.” I laughed and wiped my eyes. “Mom, you just left!”

“No, I didn’t. Hale sent me to a spa for a few days.” She preened. “I’ve been dipped and waxed in places that haven’t seen the light of day in decades. You should feel how smooth I am?—”

“I’m good.” I held up my hands when she pulled at a button on her dress. I grinned at Hale. “Sneaky. I’m totally surprised.”

He bent to kiss me. “You deserve it.”

“That’s enough smooching, you two. Let her sit down, Hale.” Phina ushered me toward the bed where I noticed several crystals on the end tables. “Later, Willow is going to do a private Reiki session with you.”

“Oh, I can’t wait.”

My mom handed me a frosted mini cake. “Chef Dubois sends his love.”

I took the confection, and my eyes welled. I lifted it like a champagne toast. “To all my favorite people.”

“To Rayne and Hale and the new baby,” Tyler said holding up a mimosa. “Cheers.”

“The real shower’s next week with a hundred and fifty women from your wedding.”

The blood rushed from my face and Hale’s sister laughed. “Not funny, Phina.”

“You’re so easy. We wouldn’t put you through that in your condition, Rayne.”

I sighed, grateful that we had reached a point where the Davenports were truly getting to know me and what kind of shindigs I enjoyed. “This is perfect.”

We spent the afternoon relaxing, eating, and telling stories that had me laughing until my bladder was about to explode. I opened a few presents, but nothing overwhelming. Hale had taken care of everything, and the gifts we received were incredibly heartfelt .

My mother gave us a blanket, and Naomi gifted us with couture Christmas stockings, one for each of us with our names embroidered on the cuff. Phina gave us a silver-plated baby brush to be engraved when little Conley or Keeley was born.

Tyler had canvas prints made of animals he’d photographed at the Washington Park Zoo. Marta made my favorite meal for dinner and told me to expect enough frozen suppers to fill an industrial fridge when the baby was born.

“You guys are the best.” I blew my nose and mopped the tears of gratitude from my face. “I’m sorry. I just cry all the time now.”

After dinner, I returned alone to the guestroom, where Willow did her magic.

“Your heart chakra’s no longer as closed off as it once was, Rayne.”

I sensed as much. “I’ve been doing the affirmations we discussed, and I try to meditate a few times a week.”

“Good.” She placed crystals over my protruding stomach and walked me through several breathing practices.

“I’d like to help you cleanse the house of negative energy while I’m here.”

“That would be great.” Then I had an idea. “How do you feel about coming out again when I’m due?”

“I could do that.”

“Good. You can be my spiritual doula.” Willow had such a calming effect on me.

“As long as you understand I’m not an actual doula. I have no medical expertise where babies are concerned.”

“I know. But you're good for the mommy, and what’s good for the mommy is good for the baby. I’ll tell Hale to arrange your flights. We’ll take care of everything.”

That night, when I told Hale my plan to fly Willow in for the birth he was confused. “You want me to what?”

“Fly her in. She calms me down, Hale.”

He frowned. “That’s my job.”

“This is different. What’s the big deal?”

“You’re talking about the hippy who works underground in New York, right?”

“Don’t be disrespectful. She’s my spiritual doula.”

“That’s not a thing, Rayne.”

“It is now.” I rubbed cocoa butter on my belly. “Don’t you want me to be happy?”

“You know I do. But what happened to keeping things normal ?”

I paused. This was a little excessive, but the thought of having Willow’s calming presence nearby for the birth really relieved some of my fear. I was terrified of labor pain and worried my vagina would be ruined after passing a human through it. Honestly, a C-section and heavy drugs seemed like the Cadillac way to go, but that wasn’t an option right now.

“I want this one bougie thing. I’m giving you a child, so I think you can give me this.” It wasn’t like Hale didn’t give me everything I wanted anyway. We all knew he’d say yes. He was just having a hard time understanding that Reiki was more than an energetic scam job.

“Fine. I’ll make the arrangements.”

“Thank you.”

The following day, Hale arranged brunch for our guests. I insisted on inviting Remington, Miles, Alphonse, and Raoul since they weren’t included in the baby shower.

Willow fluttered to Remington like a moth drawn to a flame, and plucked at the air around his head. “Your aura has some darkness to it.”

He shot me a look and growled, “Meyers.”

“Willow, I don’t think he likes that.”

“Negative energy pollutes the soul. You should let me help you unblock your chakra.”

“For pity’s sake, where do you pick up these strays?” He glared at Willow. “I like my aura just as it is. Put back anything you took.” Taking his fruit plate to the table, he grumbled, “Worse than a Roman pickpocket.”

I chuckled and ate my French toast.

After brunch, Alphonse drove Tyler and Willow to the airport. My mom stuck around to spend the day with me. We watched some of our favorite movies like Overboard and The Princess Bride, then topped off the day with some trashy reality television—the kind Hale hated but was secretly invested in.

Every time he entered the living room, he stared at the screen, watching the drama unfold until he caught himself watching. Then he would shake his head and mumble how ridiculous our shows were. Yet he always conveniently needed something from the living room whenever there was drama with the characters.

“You’ve got yourself a good one there, Ray,” my mom said, after Hale brought me a cup of tea. “You’re very lucky.”

My mom never complained about raising me as a single parent. My dad had been around when she was pregnant, but I couldn’t imagine him being anywhere near as supportive as Hale.

“I guess Dad was nothing like Hale.”

“No, but I’m not just thinking about your father. Hale’s special. He truly cares about your well-being.”

We rarely spoke about my father, mostly at my request. After the wedding, I wanted to forget my Dad existed—much like he’d forgotten I’d existed for most of my life. But becoming a parent changed my perspective about a lot of things.

“I was scared at first.” I kept my voice low so Hale wouldn’t overhear me.

My mom frowned. “Of what, sweetie?”

This wasn’t an easy confession for me, but it felt good to get it off my chest. “I sometimes think that’s why I didn’t get pregnant immediately. I was afraid of doing it alone. You made it look so easy, Mom. Even when we were barely making it, you made sure I always had everything I needed.”

“Oh, honey, Hale would never abandon you.”

I believed that too, but there was still that deep seated fear that no man could tolerate me forever. “Sometimes dads leave.”

She squeezed my hand. “And sometimes they stay and break the cycle. Hale loves you and Elara with all of his heart. He’ll love this new baby just as much. You’ll see.”

“I hate that his abandonment left such a prominent scar.”

She paused the television and turned to fully face me. “Honey, your father didn’t abandon you. He left because I threw him out.”

“What?”

She wrung her hands. “You have to understand. I only wanted to protect you. I always tried to make the right choices, but you see now there’s no one-size-fits-all playbook for parenting.”

My mind was reeling. “Hold on. You’re saying Dad never actually left?”

She scoffed. “Believe it or not, getting him out was quite the chore. But I knew it would be for the best.”

“How was that for the best?”

“Rayne, a mother’s love is so overwhelming and all-encompassing, I don’t know if men can fully grasp what we feel as mothers. Fathers are different. You were precious and perfect and I would have done anything to protect you. Even if that meant protecting you from a lousy father.”

A few years ago, I would have questioned my mom’s assessment of the man who shared my DNA. But today I was wiser. My father would have continuously let me down and hurt me. I believed she protected me from that, even if it was sometimes lonely and confusing not to have a dad around. “You did a good job, Mom.”

“I did my best.”

I never thought of my mom as tough, but it took a strong backbone to throw a man out, knowing life would be hard in other ways without him. “Was it because of Laura?”

“Laura, and the others. Your father has always been an extraordinarily selfish man. Ray was always worrying about Ray. The funny thing is, our life actually got easier without him. There were no more surprise collection notices, no more missing paychecks. What we had, we earned, and I made sure we kept everything that was ours.”

My hands rested on my belly. “I think you made the right choice.”

“I hope so.” She pressed play and the drama on the screen continued.

That night, when I went to bed, I was still thinking about the things my mother said. Unlike my father, my mother had kept her word. She did her best to raise and protect me, always putting my needs before her own.

When I was younger and he’d stand me up, I’d cry and she’d say, “You don’t need him, Rayne.” It took me more than thirty years to realize she was right.

I never told my mom that I met Laura or that I had two half-sisters. Just like she wanted to protect me, I wanted to protect her.

As I lay in bed, I wondered how she managed. I was a frantic mess the first time Elara got sick, but Hale was always there to calm me down and help with the decisions, the way a true partner should. We had the financial stability to give our children everything they could possibly need. My mother had no such security, yet she still made sure my needs were always met.

I wondered how much she had to sacrifice to make that happen. I couldn’t recall her ever having her nails done at a salon or splurging on a pretty piece of clothing simply because she liked it. As a matter of fact, my mother was still wearing clothes she’d owned since my childhood .

Unable to sleep, I put on Hale’s robe and tiptoed down to his office. I logged onto the laptop and opened a search engine. An hour later and I had a list of addresses and names.

“There you are.” Hale appeared at the door, bare-chested and holding a bottle of water.

“I couldn’t sleep.”

He came into the office and glanced at the computer screen. “What are you doing?”

“You know how you’re always telling me not to feel bad that we have money?”

“Yes.” He chuckled nervously. “Are you impulse shopping?”

“I haven’t bought anything yet, but I’ve decided you’re right.”

“Is that so?”

“Yup. I’m about to cost you a ton of money, sir.” I clicked open a tab and turned the screen so he could see what I found. “We’re buying my mom this house.”