Celebrities Don’t Date Bookworms (Texting the Boyband #1)
Chapter 3
18%
three
“No,” I said. I pulled myself free from her grip and laughed. “That’s ridiculous, Sloane.”
I continued on walking and wiped my shirt a little, my lip curling in disgust. Of course, I’d spilled coffee on myself when I was wearing my only non-stained white shirt. The one plus side was that it was going to get colder soon, and I would have to wear the sweater part of my uniform again so I didn’t freeze in school, which would cover up the stain. Until then, I guess I’d have to wear the black shirt instead—one of the only good parts of our uniform was how many choices we had.
“No, it’s not,” Sloane said. She grabbed my arm again to make me stop. I rolled my eyes but looked at her. “Trust me, Megan, I know what Hudson Shaw looks like. Grace has his poster on the outside of her bedroom door, so I have to walk past it every day, and that—” she pointed at the coffee shop over her shoulder “—was him. I’m positive. ”
She looked serious enough that I didn’t think she was just pulling my leg for some reason, but I still thought she had to be mistaken. After all, what would Hudson-freaking-Shaw be doing hanging out in our local Starbucks on a Thursday afternoon? Celebrities didn’t just hang around here… except we did know for certain that the band was in Bibridge. And his bandmate had been spotted at another coffee shop. Was that what the barista meant when she said they were just as lucky as the people at Sunset Cafe?
“That doesn’t make sense,” I said hollowly, even though I was quickly realizing that it actually did.
“It doesn’t matter if it makes sense,” Sloane said, “because it happened.” She checked her watch and huffed impatiently. “Look, I’d love to keep talking, but I have to get home. Just…” She shook her head and blinked. “Megan, you met Hudson Shaw.”
“I met Hudson Shaw,” I repeated. The words sounded wrong on my lips. I was just some nobody, and he was one of the biggest celebrities in the world. What were the chances of that happening?
“Call me tonight,” she said. She started down the road towards her house but kept her eyes on me, and a hand pointed in my direction. “We need to come up with a game plan for Monday.”
“Monday?”
“Don’t tell me you’ve already forgotten,” Sloane said. “He’s starting at our school. And trust me, I am sure he is going to remember you.”
The idea of Hudson Shaw, of all people remembering me, sounded insane, but I didn’t argue with her. It wasn’t worth the effort—she would see the truth when the boys started at school next week, and Hudson didn’t spare me a single glance. Why would he remember some random girl he met in a coffee shop when he was constantly meeting socialites and celebrities and other pretty girls who were obsessed with him? I would give it twenty minutes before he forgot what my face looked like.
My phone dinged loudly as I walked home, and I pulled it out of my pocket to check again. I had five text notifications on my home screen since the last time I looked. A little megaphone emoji told me that someone had tagged me in the group, which was strange. Even though they had all been talking a little today, this was the first time anyone had engaged with me directly.
Group: I promise this isn’t a group chat, Dad
Members: Ni-Ni, Bay, Sharky, Tis Moi Luca, Zesty
Bay
I just did the most mortifying thing
I’ll tell you when I get home
Tis Moi, Luca
Can’t wait
Ok so Z told me he is in fact not in this group chat
So who are you @zesty
I grinned to myself as I looked at the message. All things considered, I was now feeling confident that this wasn’t some weird prank because nobody would have the dedication to keep it going for this long. Between that and everything that had happened today, I was in the mood for a little bit of mischief, and this seemed like the perfect time to do it.
Zesty
Wouldn’t you like to know?
Ni-Ni
I know it’s our fault you’re here
But this group chat is supposed to be private
So you need to leave
Zesty
Make me
There was something about being behind the screen that made me feel stronger. Cooler. Like I could be anyone I wanted, instead of the pathetic part I played in real life.
Ni-Ni
@Tis Moi, Luca you’re the only one with admin privileges
Tis Moi, Luca
But I don’t want to kick them out :((
Ni-Ni
Luca we don’t know them
Tis Moi, Luca
Bay always says a stranger is just a friend you haven’t met yet
Zesty
Hey, my mom says that too!
Tis Moi, Luca
Omg twinsies
Wait does that make you and Bay twins?
Sharky
No it makes you twins because Bay is the mom friend of this group
Ni-Ni
I thought you were the mom friend?
You’re always telling us how we need to be healthier, and blah blah blah
At least I think you do
I kinda tune it out
Sharky
Thanks.
Tis Moi, Luca
I think he’s more of a dad friend
I will not take questions or elaborate at this time.
Sharky
Great
Now going back to what’s actually important
@zesty who are you??
Zesty
I asked you first
Sharky
No you didn’t?
Zesty
Scroll up
It was the first thing I said
Checkmate
Ni-Ni
Should we tell them?
Zesty
Ooo you have something to tell me?
Color me intrigued
Sharky
Are you kidding?
George and Rob will kill us
Tis Moi, Luca
That’s a risk I’m willing to take
@Bay thoughts?
Ni-Ni
Yeah Bay, get in here
Bay
They seem trustworthy
I vote we tell them
Zesty
Majority rules, tell me
Sharky
I’m not sure this is a majority rules situation
I think it should be all or nothing
Tis Moi, Luca
You’re just saying that because you’re the only one voting no
Bay
Wait we should get Z in here
He deserves a vote
Zesty
You guys realized you forgot to add your friend to a group chat…
And your first thought wasn’t to add him?
Z needs better friends
Tis Moi, Luca
Hey! We did not FORGET to add him
We just accidentally added you instead
Sharky
“We”
Tis Moi, Luca
Don’t be rude
Zesty
Speaking of which, how did I end up here?
Tis Moi, Luca
Z changed phone numbers, and I saved it wrong in my phone
But so did everyone else!! So it’s not my fault
Sharky
It absolutely is still your fault
Tis Moi, Luca
You want to fight?
Meet me outside
Zesty
Not to make this even worse
But you still haven’t added him
Tis Moi, Luca
SHOOT
Bay
Haha, he’s going to kill you
Tis Moi, Luca
Shut up Bay
Nobody even likes you
Bay
Tell that to my 500k twitter followers
Tis Moi, Luca
They obviously all hit the button by mistake
Tis Moi, Luca added Not Zesty to the chat
Bay
FINALLY
It only took you 24 hours
Tis Moi, Luca
BEING AN ADMIN IS A LOT OF WORK
Not Zesty
Heyooo
Wait why is this my name
Tis Moi, Luca
Because your name was supposed to be Zesty
But then somebody (not naming names) added the wrong person, and named them Zesty
So now you’re Not Zesty
Sharky
To be clear, it was Luca
Tis Moi, Luca
NOT NAMING NAMES
Sharky
It was Luca
Bay
It was Luca
Ni-Ni
It was Luca
Zesty
It was Luca
Tis Moi, Luca
STAY OUT OF THIS MYSTERY PERSON
Zesty
YOU’RE THE ONE WHO KEPT ME IN THE CHAT
Tis Moi, Luca
Well shame on me for trying to make new friends
Not Zesty
We should talk about this in person
Meet in the living room
Tis Moi, Luca
Are you guys home??
Sharky
…Yes
Bay
Not me
I’m on my way back
Ni-Ni
Me and Z have been playing video games for hours
Can’t you hear us?
Tis Moi, Luca
That’s you?
I figured it was a raccoon
Bay
What
Sharky
You thought there was a raccoon in the house…
And you just accepted it?
Tis Moi, Luca
I figured if it was still there when I went downstairs then I would adopt it as a pet
Or force Fi to deal with it
One or the other
Sharky
What is wrong with you Luca
Tis Moi, Luca
That’s not very nice
Sharky
Says the guy who would use me as a human shield against a raccoon
Zesty
So you guys all live together then?
Tis Moi, Luca
Omg I forgot you were here
You’re so quiet
Zesty
Yeah I’m fantastic at sneaking up on people
Usually in person
Not Zesty
Luca get down here
Group meeting
Tis Moi, Luca
Coming sir
Not Zesty
Quit calling me sir
Tis Moi, Luca
Would you rather I go back to Gramps?
Not Zesty
I’m only a year older than you
Forget it, I’m not having this argument again
Zesty
Ok so you do all live together then
I’m guessing siblings?
Maybe cousins because five kids is a lot
Especially in three years
Unless any of you are twins or triplets or something
Tis Moi, Luca
Nope, try again
Zesty
Hmmmm
Can I get a hint?
Sharky
Quit texting, and focus Luca
Tis Moi, Luca
Hypocrite
And hint: we only moved in together recently
Not Zesty
Luca stop telling them so much
And focus
Tis Moi, Luca
Take five, Zesty
Not Zesty
LUCA JUDE
Tis Moi, Luca
Ooooh full first name, got to go
I laughed to myself as I read Luca’s message. I liked that he hadn’t immediately removed me from the chat like the others wanted him to, but it also did leave me with more questions than answers. Who were they, and why wouldn’t they tell me immediately? What was this secret that they had to have a meeting about? Why did they live together if they weren’t siblings? They were all hopefully questions I would get answers to in due time…, but I wasn’t exactly known for my patience.
The boys didn’t get back to me for a while, and the longer I waited, the more my anticipation grew. What was this big secret that they were so concerned about? It had to be something good if they were this nervous about telling me. My phone didn’t buzz again until I was home and sitting on the couch, some mindless reality show playing on the TV to distract me.
Group name: I promise this isn’t a group chat, Dad
Members: Ni-Ni, Bay, Sharky, Tis Moi Luca, Zesty, Not Zesty
Tis Moi, Luca
Okay we have deliberated, and come to a decision
We’ll tell you our secret if you tell us your name
I stared at the message for a few seconds until I felt like it was imprinted on my mind. If you tell us your name . There were a couple of possibilities here. The first one was that this was still part of some long-standing ruse that was making less and less sense by the second. The second was that they genuinely had no idea who I was, and they wanted to figure it out, but my name would be of no benefit to them if they didn’t know me at school, right? Had I unknowingly tipped them off to something I didn’t want them to know by mentioning that I went to Summerfield? They seemed like nice people in this chat, but people could easily hide their true intentions behind a screen. Look at me, pretending to be confident and cool on here when in reality, I was an insecure mess. If they figured out who I was in real life, there was no telling what they would do.
Zesty
No can do on the name
I don’t know you well enough for that, y’know?
I waited for one of them to answer with bated breath. I didn’t know why I was so worried about what they were going to say in response; it wasn’t like I actually knew them. They couldn’t do anything to me. The worst they could do was kick me out of the group, which would just make everything go back to the way it was 48 hours ago. I should have felt relieved by the idea, but instead… all I felt was sadness. How had I gotten attached th is quickly?
Sharky
We understand
Tis Moi, Luca
Could you at least give us a nickname?
Not Zesty
And maybe a photo
Doesn’t have to show your full face
We would just feel better knowing you actually are the same age as us, and all that
Zesty
If I’m sending you a photo of myself, you have to promise to send one too
Tis Moi, Luca
Of course
We are gentlemen, after all
I’d kind of assumed by now that they were all guys, even though I had nothing substantial to base that on, but it felt weird getting confirmation of it. I was in a group chat with five boys. I wasn’t even sure I could name five boys that I’d had a non-school-related conversation with in the last year. Funny how that worked out.
Zesty
I guess you can call me eggo
That’s what my brother called me for ages before he could pronounce my nam e
I felt a little weird sharing a personal story like that—it wasn’t exactly anything ground-breaking, but I was pretty sure it was something nobody outside of my family and Sloane knew about me, but if I was going to be in this group chat long-term, it was probably about time that I get used to giving out details of my life. Things would come up, and I would want to share, so it was easier to start now, right?
Tis Moi, Luca changed Zesty’s name to Eggo
Tis Moi, Luca
Hope you don’t mind
I was getting confused by Zesty, and Not Zesty
Sharky
And whose fault was that?
Tis Moi, Luca
I didn’t ask you
Eggo
I’m cool with it!
And here’s a photo
I attached a recent selfie I’d taken of myself at the airport. In the photo, I had a face mask and glasses on, and my hood up, so only the top half of my face and a tiny bit of my hair were visible. I was hoping I wouldn’t be very recognizable from it since I hardly ever wore glasses, and my most distinct feature—my blonde hair—was mostly hidden. I thought the photo at least showed enough for them to see that I was actually a sixteen-year-old girl.
Ni-Ni
So you ARE a girl!
Eggo
Yes?
Tis Moi, Luca
Sorry we just had a bet going
Eggo
Now your turn
Tis Moi, Luca
One sec
The photo came through a minute later. It was a group of five boys at the beach with the wind blowing in their hair. Even though I knew next to nothing about the band, it took me less than ten seconds to recognize the photo was the poster of Take Five that Grace had up in her room.
Eggo
Nice try
I know that’s Take Five
Tis Moi, Luca
Omg you know Take Five?
Eggo
Everyone in the world knows the m
I hesitated for a second before deciding that it was worth being honest and added:
Eggo
Unfortunately
Bay
Unfortunately?
Isn’t it a good thing?
Eggo
Not when all anyone at school can talk about is how Take Five is coming to our school next week
If I never hear their names again it will be too soon
Ni-Ni
oh
Tis Moi, Luca
Damn :((
Bay
You might not like us then…
I frowned. I hadn’t expected them to take it that hard.
Eggo
You guys big fans?
Tis Moi, Luca
I guess you could say that
Sharky
Now seems like a good idea for the secret
Eggo
Are you pausing for dramatic effect?
Because I’m dying here
Sharky
Right sorry
Tis Moi, Luca
You’re taking too long
SURPRISE: WE’RE ACTUALLY TAKE FIVE!
Eggo
Wait what?
What does that mean?
Bay
We’re the band
Hudson, Jude, Finn, Zach, and Neil
Eggo
Funny joke guys
Seriously send a real photo
Ni-Ni
You don’t believe us?
Eggo
Why would I?
Ni-Ni
Because it’s true…
Eggo
Why would a boyband have a random girl in their group chat?
Tis Moi, Luca
Because we added you by accident
Don’t you remember
Eggo
Of course I remember
But if you were the real boyband then you would have kicked me out
Ni-Ni
It wasn’t for a lack of trying
Tis Moi, Luca
HEY
Don’t be mean to my new friend
Ni-Ni
You don’t even know her name
Bay
And she doesn’t believe who we are
Tis Moi, Luca
I don’t care
We’re nice in this house
Eggo
Aww thank you Luca
And seriously, can I get a pic of you guys?
Ni-Ni
WE ALREADY SENT ONE
Eggo
a) I know that’s not you
b) even if it was, that photo is on a poster so you obviously got it from online
Bay
Maybe we just want you to think we’re cute
Eggo
It’s not like I look cute in mine
Bay
Beg to differ
Tis Moi, Luca
Stop flirting
Here’s a new photo
The photo loaded a second later. Once again, it was a group of five boys, but this time, they were all sitting next to each other on a couch. Similar to my photo, they had hoodies on, exposing almost none of their hair, but instead of wearing face masks, they were wearing sunglasses to hide half their faces. It wasn’t much to go on, but at least I was reassured they were my around age.
Eggo
Much better
So how do you guys know each other?
Tis Moi, Luca
We can’t reveal ALL our secrets eggo
Eggo
Is this friendship really based on secrets Luca?
Tis Moi, Luca
Apparently it is
According to you
Eggo
Is this just because I won’t tell you my name or show you my face
I mean now that I write that out, it makes sense
But still
Not Zesty
We have to go
See you later
Eggo
All of you have to go?
Together?
Suspicious
Sharky
How is it suspicious?
Eggo
I’m…
not sure
I just wanted to say it
See ya later
Tis Moi, Luca
BYE
Eggo
BYE
It was too bad that we weren’t sharing our real identities. If they were actually like this in real life, I probably would like to be friends with them, but then, I wasn’t anything like “eggo” in real life. If they saw who I was in real life, I doubt they’d like me at all.