Ceridor (Danubian #4)

4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four

Ceridor

After I finished singing the legend of the eagle and the bear, King Ott said that I needn't continue to entertain them. I could have dinner and boarding tonight in thanks, but that was all that was needed.

Not a good sign, especially considering the other guests in the hall this evening, ones I recognized as local warriors and rulers under the regional rulership. King Ott had his support gathered around him already, as if he were planning an attack.

Princess Alodia waved me over, scooting so as to clear the chair between her and her twin. My smile stretched into a grin as I sat between them and both twins leaned into me conspiratorially. Some things certainly hadn't changed since they were little: these two were still mischievous siblings with no shortage of mirth that would drag Magnus into trouble with them.

"Master Bard," Effie prompted, "you look so familiar to me. Are you sure we haven't met before?"

I decided to let her try to guess before I gave it away. I turned to my right, and one look into Prince Johannes's beautiful brown eyes told me he knew the truth.

For an instant fear flashed across my skin that he might not have wanted to see me again, but the shy smile on his lips and the hopeful gleam in his eyes put my heart at ease.

"It's good to see you," said Johannes, as if he couldn't believe I was here.

"It's good to see you too, my prince," I answered, so proud that he had grown up strong.

" Oi! " interrupted Effie, patting my knee urgently. "Johann, how do you know who he is and I don't? Ceridor doesn't ring a bell, but if that is your bardic name...is there another name you go by?"

I decided to put her out of her misery. I turned to her with the indulgent smile I'd always used with my brother and the twins. "Magnus says hallo ."

Effie's beautiful brown eyes grew impossibly wide, then she gasped and exclaimed, "Christian!"

" Shhhh! " I hushed her and Johannes all but leapt across my lap to cover Effie's mouth with his hand. Thankfully King Ott was distracted by the festivities and hadn't heard.

"Where have you been ?" Effie asked through Johannes's fingers.

Johannes released her with a bashful apology to both of us and slunk back to my other side, making me chuckle at his antics.

"I work as a bard," I said, stating the obvious. "Magnus hammers me with questions about you two whenever I visit home, so I've actually been dropping in and singing to your father at least a couple of times a year, in the guise of an old man."

I'd never risked appearing as myself at this court until now, when I needed to project my full strength to get my message across. What protected me from recognition by King Ott was the sheer fact that I looked much more like my late mother than my father, the Regent of East Helvetica. The petty king of West Danube had no reason to remember a Prince Regent, even if our lands were neighbors.

"Why would you hide?" Johannes asked.

"I need my anonymity for a number of reasons," I answered, dodging the fact that King Ott had frankly delusional ambitions of becoming a High King himself, and ever since Queen Ott had died, my father the Regent of East Helvetica understandably hadn't trusted him.

"Could Magnus visit?" asked Effie hopefully.

Sadly, I shook my head. "My baby brother unfortunately looks exactly like a younger version of our father—I worry he'd be recognized."

"He's bald already?" Johannes asked. He covered his mouth with his hands when I pinched his leg and shot him a look. "Sorry, Christian."

"Please, call me Ceridor."

He nodded.

Effie's bright demeanor had grown subdued. "Those were happier times. I wish we could visit."

The three of us fell silent a long moment. In the fifteen years since the last playdate, both our mothers had passed from illness.

Effie excused herself to the restroom and Johannes spoke up. "I've wondered about you ever since. Mother said she'd heard from your mother that you were studying at a monastery."

I nodded. A servant brought my dinner and I tucked in. "Father didn't approve of my wanting to become a bard, so Mother moved back in with her parents and brought Magnus until they could finalize a divorce. I went to study at Diana Monastery in Helvetica. They taught me more official bardic studies and lots of memory techniques. After five years there, I felt like I could strike out on my own."

The monks there had also taught me esoteric western paganism. And magic, the same magic I used for my disguises, but I didn't share that with the young prince.

"Are you happy?" Johannes asked, catching me by surprise. "Do you have a wife waiting for you somewhere?"

I found it strange that he equated the two things—happiness and being tied to someone—but I answered him honestly all the same. "I'm doing well enough, and no, I don't have a partner. My profession is too demanding. Though I wish I had a husband."

That took a moment to sink in, then Johannes's eyes grew very wide in recognition.

"Th-that," he stammered, then cleared his throat and started over. "M-me too. My mother helped me to understand it when I became a teenager. She said that in the larger cities in Helvetica it was treated like no big deal."

I smiled and patted his shoulder, just like I used to, though Johann was now definitely a fully grown man. "She was right. We're treated just like anyone else, even in the more remote areas, though it depends on the village."

"That's wonderful," he replied.

His gaze lingered on mine for a long moment and I struggled to breathe. Finally my brain caught up and I realized Johann wasn't the only one experiencing a sudden and unexpected attraction. Desire flushed his cheeks as he scanned me, unabashed, and my skin tingled as if he were coasting his fingertips all over me.

"I had the biggest crush on you when I was little," he whispered, his eyes looking off into a different time. "I all but worshipped at your feet. It wasn't until I became a teenager that I realized what that meant."

I blinked at him. "What did it mean?"

He jumped in his seat and snapped out of his reverie. " Entschuldigung —excuse me, that was inappropriate."

I still wasn't sure of the point he was trying to make, and though I harbored a guess, I didn't want to assume. Instead I patted his knee and smiled at him. "You always were my biggest fan aside from Mother."

That seemed to do the trick—Johann lit with joy. "I'd known for sure you'd make it as a bard, and you have!"

His enthusiasm was infectious and for a moment we just beamed at each other.

Effie returned and, while I ate, she peppered me with questions about what it was like working as a bard, how far I'd traveled, and how I'd come to my calling. All the while I felt Johann's eyes on me, but whenever I'd turn to glance his way, he'd jump and bashfully stare at his tea, his cheeks flushed red.

Johann was fully grown, having filled out his bulk. From observing his muscled tone and his athletic posture, it was clear he trained. But I could not believe what my lying eyes were telling me. If I weren't mistaken, his furtive glances and soft brushing of my shoulder whenever one of us moved were indications that he was indeed attracted to me.

That shift in perspective settled over me as Effie drew my attention back and asked something about the legends of the Nibelungenlied , but I continued to feel Johann's gaze. He was an adult now: twenty-one, the same age as Magnus. It had never occurred to me that we could have an adult relationship, but I found that I was willing when I took a moment to consider it. I knew that he was a good soul who had grown into a strong and good man. If I was what he wanted, then I would bask in his desire and let him come in pursuit.

As dinner ended, Johann touched my thigh in question and I turned to him, feeling my cheeks burning now after all this build up.

"Shall I show you to your room?" he offered.

" Wunderbar, danke ," I answered in kind.

Effie bid us goodnight and Johann led me to a room just down from his and that of his twin's, then told me where to find the toilets and bathing facilities.

"Thank you, Johann," I said, then waited as I noticed him lingering in the hallway, clearly hesitating.

"W-would..." He coughed into his fist and cleared his throat. "Would you like to come to my room? I can call for some of the honeyed alpine tea we're famous for. There's an herbal one we drink at night to help us sleep."

"Just tea?" I asked, unable to resist teasing him.

Though the hallway was only dimly lit by torches, I could see enough to make out poor Johann's face go red as a beet.

"Well, um, we could have tea and... conversation," he stammered.

Just tea and... conversation? I nearly replied, but held back, relenting in my torment and granting him some mercy.

"Sure," I said with a smile, and followed him to his room.