Ceridor (Danubian #4)

17. Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen

The next day

Ceridor

Father, the Regent of East Helvetica, sat back in his chair and asked a follow-up question on the update I'd just finished giving him about the machinations of the petty regional Danubian kings. As regent, he was most concerned with economic issues, primarily trade or laundering that came through the border, and also the stability and state of West Danube, the region that shared our eastern border.

Magnus sat nearby as I stood in front of Father. My little brother listened to the update, chin on his fist, elbow on one knee, ankle propped against the other knee. His eyes danced occasionally, clearly looking forward to us catching up together after this, but overall I couldn't react with our father in the room, and only took in my baby brother in my peripheral vision.

Father had gone completely bald some time ago, and though his head was a bit bulbous it overall didn't look too bad on him, so if Magnus and I were destined for the same fate I wasn't too worried. His brows were thick and black, furrowed as he confirmed a couple of details and noted some things down. I was grateful to take after my mother, which allowed me to travel throughout even neighboring lands without being recognized as a prince regent of East Helvetica. Magnus was not so lucky, so it was good that I was the one who wanted to travel around and he was the one who wanted to take over as regent.

I gave Father the information he needed, but I saved a deeper and more detailed trove of information for Magnus. My relationship with my father was chilly to say the least, and had been ever since I'd come into my own.

The night of my eighteenth birthday, Father had called me to his office after my birthday dinner. Since I had come of age, he planned to do an official announcement with lots of pomp and circumstance to name me as his heir and successor to the position of regent. Helvetica was a republic with feudal tendencies. If a Regent was successful at running his lands, the people of the region would likely allow the regent's son or daughter to take over if they promised to run things the same way. However, if the public became dissatisfied, a minimum number of signatures on a petition could trigger an election and a changeover of those in power.

It was thus quite the issue for me to tell Father that I did not want to take over for him, and that I wanted to work as a bard, to travel the lands collecting folk songs and singing to kings. In Father's eyes it was stupid, but to me it was my precious dream that I had been quietly working on for years. Mother had allowed me to take singing lessons since I was twelve, and those lessons had saved me through my early teen years when I realized I was attracted to men in addition to women.

I'd suspected Father might not approve, and, worried about his disdain, I'd asked Mother if I should hide such things from him. She'd firmly told me that both my sexuality and my singing lessons were none of his business. That gave me the right framework in which to protect my dreams while I fostered them out of sight throughout my teen years.

Father had doubted my bardic admission at first, refused to believe it, since I had never once defied him before that. Then, when it finally sank in that I wasn't taking over no matter what, and that Magnus—who then was only six—was his only hope for a legacy as regent, Father became livid.

I hadn't known Magnus had been listening at the door. But that likely saved my life, because the sounds of Father thrashing me had sent Magnus running to alert our mother, who had put a stop to it and gotten us both out of there and to our maternal grandparents' home.

We'd stayed with my maternal grandparents for months while Mother began divorce proceedings against Father, claiming that even one assault against me was not to be tolerated. That had taught me a lesson about my importance, that Mother valued me that much, and that I should thus value myself that much, by her example.

Once I'd physically recovered, Mother had contacted a monastery deep in the Alps south of our lands and encouraged me to travel there and study their memory techniques, since they would help me to work as a bard. Magnus had stayed with Mother and our maternal grandparents until all three of them had passed, and then at fifteen he'd returned to Father. I had visited often once he moved back in order to make sure Father didn't beat or manipulate him, but thanks to Mother's strength and courage, Magnus too grew up strong and eventually decided he wanted to train to take over as regent someday.

Father couldn't retire soon enough, and though I brought him information, I had ceased to trust or respect him ever since that night. By the look on his face as I finished my report, he felt much the same about me, only begrudgingly acknowledging me as his son.

My update complete, Father dismissed me, and Magnus followed me out of the office. Once the door closed, my baby brother took my hand. With a twelve-year difference between us, he'd grown up holding my hand as I watched over him and led him around. The fact that he'd continued wanting to do that even into adulthood I found to be so sweet.

"Update me later," he said softly, giving my hand a squeeze before letting go. "I'll swing by to see Effie."

" Ja, okay ."