Christmas Cancellation

21. NOELLE

Chapter twenty-one

O nce my hair was dry, I splashed cold water on my face, trying to erase the evidence of hours spent crying. Grabbing a towel, I patted my skin dry and glanced at my reflection in the mirror. My eyes were still a bit puffy, but the redness had faded. I dabbed on some concealer, swiped mascara over my lashes, and ran a brush through my curls. There, that was better.

My breakdown in the cemetery had been cathartic, like lancing a wound that had festered for too long. I’d never let myself go like that in front of anyone—not even Amanda, and especially not Blake. He would have just scoffed and told me to get over it. But Kol…Kol had stood there calmly, letting me rail and cry and blame myself. And then he’d shared his own pain, his own guilt.

I leaned against the bathroom counter, remembering the warmth in his eyes, the understanding. No man had ever been that emotionally available to me. It was shocking really. When I’d first met Kol, he had struck me as anything but compassionate. The way he’d set me straight at the airport had made me think he would be cold or dismissive—like Blake always was. But he had turned out to be the opposite of all my assumptions in every way that mattered. His thoughtfulness and kindness didn’t align with my preconceptions about Army Night Stalkers or airline pilots, and he surprised me at every turn.

I let out a small laugh. Misjudging Mr. Captain had been easy when he was calling me out for being an obnoxious brat at the airport. My cheeks burned as I thought about how rude I’d been. Yet, Kol hadn’t held it against me; instead, he’d offered me a ride.

My thoughts drifted to last night, to that other side of him—the dominant, possessive one. It sent a shudder down my spine and made heat pool in my belly. That side had commanded and teased and pushed me to the edge of pleasure. I’d never experienced anything like it. It was delicious, intoxicating. And I wanted more.

I took a deep breath, steeling myself for what came next. I didn’t know what this thing between Kol and me was, but I knew I wanted to explore it. I wanted to see where it could go. And that meant putting myself out there. It meant taking a risk.

After finishing up in the bathroom, I made my way downstairs. While waiting for Kol, I danced around the kitchen and gathered a few ingredients for a special treat, humming along to the Christmas tunes playing from my phone. I was glad my ankle was only a little sore now.

I glanced at the clock, excited for him to return with the pizza. I hadn’t baked in ages, but these cookies were my jam—yummy and always a hit. Plus, they were pink, which made them even better.

Christmas Eve would be special for the first time in a long time. I was grateful for Kol’s help. Without him, I would have never made it to Holly Winters’s office or discovered the truth about everything that had happened after my parents’ deaths. Kol had been my rock, carrying me into the house when I’d twisted my ankle and then again after I broke down in the cemetery. He was my guardian angel, like in…what was that old movie? Oh yeah, It’s a Wonderful Life .

I stirred the dough one last time and started dropping spoonfuls onto the baking sheet. Chocolate cherry chip cookies were my secret weapon. They were easy to make and always perfect. They didn’t even require an electric mixer—just mix, drop, and bake.

I popped them into the oven and set about cleaning up the kitchen, which we’d left a mess after dashing off this morning.

When the timer dinged, I grabbed the oven mitts, pulling out a tray of perfectly pink cookies with golden edges. I set them down to cool, resisting the urge to shove one of them straight into my mouth. Kol would be back any minute, and I wanted him to try this unique twist on the classic chocolate chip cookie.

As if on cue, the front door creaked open, and Kol’s deep voice echoed through the house. “Noelle? Where you at?”

“In the kitchen!” I called out, wiping my hands on a festive towel.

Kol stepped in, carrying two large pizzas and a bag of drinks. Snowflakes dusted his hair like powdered sugar on brownies.

“Got dinner,” he announced, setting the pizza boxes on one counter and the drinks on the other. He scanned the room, his eyes lingering on the tray of cookies. “Mmm, what’s that tasty smell? ”

I grinned, leaning against the counter. “Cookies. The best you’ve ever had. You said your favorite was chocolate chip, but these take it a step beyond.”

He raised an eyebrow at the sight of them. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Those are pink!”

I laughed, rolling my eyes. “You’re not wrong. Pink is my favorite color. So I waved my magic wand, and poof, they were pink. Try one.”

Kol eyed the cookies skeptically.

“Oh, don’t be a baby,” I teased. “They’re pink because they’re chocolate cherry chip cookies. When I saw the cake mix in the pantry, I knew I had to make them.”

His brow furrowed. “Wait, what? Did you make cake or cookies? I’m so confused.”

I chuckled, shaking my head. “I made cookies from cake mix. Now, take a bite.”

Kol wrinkled his nose, looking adorably uncertain. “I don’t think so.”

“Come on,” I coaxed, picking up a cookie straight from the pan and waving it in front of him. “You said you love chocolate chip. These are even better. Don’t be a Scrooge.”

He sighed, giving in. “Fine, fine. But if I die from pink cookie poisoning, it’s on you.”

I zoomed the cookie toward his mouth like an airplane landing on a runway. With an exaggerated sigh, Kol took a big bite. His eyes widened as he chewed.

“Well?” I asked expectantly.

He grabbed the cookie from my hand and popped the rest of it into his mouth all at once. Then he reached for another. “These are…amazing.”

I grinned triumphantly. “Told you so! Are they better than those you bragged about on our drive up here? ”

He moved closer, kissing me softly. His lips tasted like chocolate and cherries, and I melted into him. “They’re even better than my momma’s,” he murmured against my mouth. “But don’t ever tell her I said that.”

Laughing, I wrapped my arms around his neck. “Your secret’s safe with me.” I stole a quick kiss, my heart suddenly light and carefree. I didn’t know why his praise meant so much to me, but it did, and a smile spread across my face. For the first time in forever, I was truly happy—here, in this sweet moment with Kol.

I pulled back, still smiling, and moved to the counter. “Okay, okay, as much as I’d love to keep kissing you, I need to get these cookies onto a plate so I can get the next batch in the oven.” I grabbed the spatula, humming softly as I carefully transferred the warm cookies from the pan.

For some reason, I felt like I was floating, like I’d downed a bottle of champagne and the bubbles were fizzing through my veins. I turned to Kol and tried to put this into words.

“You want to know what’s really odd? After everything today—after what happened in the cemetery and all the tears—I shouldn’t feel this…happy. Should I?”

He propped himself against the counter next to me. “It’s not that you shouldn’t feel happy. It’s that you’ve let go of something you’ve been holding onto for a long time. All that pain—it’s been sitting there, dragging you down. You finally let yourself feel all of it. You’ve had all that hurt, all that anger buried deep inside, eating away at you. And today at the gravesite, and with me in the tub, you finally let it out. You let yourself feel everything you’ve been avoiding. And that release—it’s powerful.”

I frowned, scooping more cookie dough onto the pan. “But it feels weird, as though I shouldn’t be this…okay after what happened. Like I’m betraying them. ”

Kol stepped closer and placed a hand on my back. “It’s not weird, Noelle. It’s normal. Suppressed grief starts to control you, even when you don’t realize it. But now that you’ve let it go—even just a little—it’s like your mind and body can finally breathe. That’s the euphoria. Subconsciously, you probably thought letting it go would mean losing a part of your parents. But that’s not what’s happening.” He squeezed my arm gently. “What you’re feeling right now, that lightness, that happiness—it’s because you’re finally allowing yourself to move forward.”

I bit my lip, turned, and opened the oven to put the last batch of cookies in. “So, this is normal? Feeling happy after all of that?”

“Completely normal. Trust me, I’ve been through it. It doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten or stopped caring—it just means you’re allowing yourself to feel joy again.”

I let his words sink in, glancing toward the living room and catching sight of the decorations. An idea struck me. “I haven’t really celebrated Christmas Eve in years. But tonight, I want to.”

“What do you have in mind?”

“I was thinking…what if we made a big picnic right there in the living room by the fire? We’ve got pizza—one with extra cheese—cookies, and if you can find some more of that wine…it would be lovely! We could relax and enjoy tonight…and maybe each other as well,” I added with a playful wink.

His grin widened, and he pulled me into a hug. “A Christmas Eve picnic by the fire with a gorgeous blonde? Now, that sounds perfect.” He kissed my forehead softly, then turned toward the fridge. “And as for the wine…I think there might be just enough to make this celebration happen.”

While I set to work grabbing plates and napkins for our impromptu indoor picnic by our cozy fireplace, Kol synced his Christmas playlist to the little speaker he’d found. Soon the soft strains of “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” filled the room. He headed to the fireplace, tossing on a few logs and stoking the embers until the flames danced and crackled, then disappeared back into the kitchen.

I set the plates down by the fire, opened the pizza boxes—one with the works and one with extra cheese, spinach, and tomatoes—and placed a few cookies on a plate nearby. Kol returned with two glasses of wine and a bottle tucked under his arm. He handed me a well-filled glass before settling down beside me on the blanket.

“To new beginnings,” he said, clinking his glass against mine.

I took a sip, wondering if he was hoping for a new beginning with me as much as I was with him. “To new beginnings.”

We dug into the pizza, the cheese stretching deliciously between slices. I laughed when he took a bite and a string of cheese clung to his chin.

“You’ve got a little something…” I teased, showing him the cheese on my finger.

He grinned, capturing my hand and licking it off my finger. A shiver ran down my spine all the way to my toes.

“Delicious,” he murmured, his eyes locked onto mine.

I swallowed, my face heating. “You really do make the best fires,” I said, scooting to sit closer to him. The flames flickered, highlighting the gold flecks in his eyes. “That’s awfully romantic for a Night Stalker.”

Kol chuckled, settling back on his elbow and giving me a crooked grin. “Romantic, huh? Didn’t know firebuilding could score me points.”

I nudged him with my shoulder. “Oh, it does. And don’t even get me started on how cozy this whole picnic is.” I gestured at the crackling fire and the blanket beneath us. “You’ve got this whole vibe down.”

His smile grew. “What can I say? I’m a man of many talents.”

“You sure are.” I sighed, wishing I could lose myself in him again.

He moved his face to within inches of mine, his gaze dropping to my lips. “Well, if the fire’s that good, maybe we should see if we can make things a little hotter in here.”

My pulse quickened. I eased closer, brushing a kiss across his cheek, teasing him with just enough contact to keep him guessing. “I could use a little warming up,” I whispered, my lips grazing his ear.

He wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me closer until our faces were almost touching. “You keep talking like that, and we might burn the house down,” he said in a rough way that made my stomach flip.

Biting my lip, I ran my hand over his chest, feeling the muscles beneath his shirt. “I think we can handle a little heat,” I said, trailing my fingers down to rest on his thigh.

He captured my mouth with his, kissing me softly at first, then quickly deepened the kiss.

He pulled away slightly, just enough to break the kiss, and his expression made my heart leap. His usual cocky grin was gone, replaced with something new, something vulnerable. For the first time, I saw him without his defenses—and the way he looked at me stole my breath. He was mine, completely, and the realization both thrilled and terrified me.

He brushed a lock of my hair behind my ear, his fingers lingering on my cheek, then trailed kisses from my temple down to my jaw, each one deliberate. When his lips met mine again, it was unlike anything I’d experienced before—soft yet intense, filled with an emotion I couldn’t quite place but didn’t want to let go of. It was tentative and sweet, as if he was trying to show me all the love in the world. He was pouring everything into this kiss. It was tender, almost reverent, a promise of things to come .

He cradled my face in his hands, his thumbs stroking my cheeks. Taking his time, he explored my mouth, savoring the moment with gentle affection. It was the kind of kiss I’d only ever read about in books or seen in movies, the kind that made your knees weak and your heart race. And it was happening to me, with Kol.

He eased back, his eyes searching mine briefly before he reached for the hem of my flannel pajama top. I lifted my arms, allowing him to remove it, leaving me bare to him.

“You’re perfect,” he murmured, his gaze sweeping over me. “Every inch of you.”

The sudden chill of the room caused goose bumps to rise on my skin, but the heat in Kol’s gaze was enough to warm me from the inside out. He leaned forward, pressing gentle kisses along my collarbones. His lips traveled downward, over the swells of my breasts, lingering at the valley between them as he lay me down on the blanket. Then his fingers began tracing the curves of my sides. He took his time, worshipping my body with a tenderness that made me feel adored.

“You’re so beautiful, Noelle,” he whispered against my skin. “And you’re all mine.”

Arching into his touch, I tangled my fingers in his hair, needing something to ground me. This differed from the aggressive, passionate sex we’d had before—this Kol was all about giving, about showing me how much he cherished me.

I gasped when he lowered his head, taking one of my sensitive peaks into his mouth. For a few delicious, fervent moments, he lavished attention on it, swirling his tongue around the tight bud before turning his attention to the other.

Too soon, Kol broke away long enough to remove his shirt, revealing his broad chest and defined muscles. My fingers itched to touch him, to trace the lines of his tattoos, but he was already moving, his hands sliding down to the waistband of my pajama bottoms.

He hooked his fingers under the fabric, wiggling them down my hips. He took a moment to appreciate the sight of me, his gaze roaming over my body with a hunger that made it clear how much he craved me.

Quickly, he removed his own pants, revealing the evidence of his arousal. But instead of rushing to take things further, he positioned his face between my thighs, his breath hot against my skin. His tongue started tracing a path up my inner thigh, making me shiver with anticipation.

When he finally reached my center, he didn’t waste any time. He lapped at my flesh, his tongue delving into my folds with a skill that left me breathless. His tongue flicked out, tracing slow circles around my clit before dipping lower to taste all of me. He was relentless in his pursuit of my gratification, his mouth working tirelessly to bring me to the brink.

His fingers joined in, sliding inside me while his tongue continued its ravenous torment of my clit. He used just enough pressure—just enough teeth. An orgasm was building within me, a slow burn that grew more intense with each passing second.

“Kol,” I gasped, my fingers twisting in his hair. “Please…”

He looked up at me, his eyes dark with desire. “What do you need, baby?”

“You,” I breathed. “I need you.”

He smiled a slow, sexy smile that made my heart flutter. Then he lowered his head. His tongue circled my clit, and his fingers moved faster, pushing me closer to the edge. My raging need built, coiling tight in my belly, ready to explode.

And then, just when I thought I couldn’t take any more, his finger curled in a way that left stars dancing behind my closed eyelids. He’d found that sweet spot within me, and I shattered, my body convulsing as the most intense orgasm of my life ripped through me.

He didn’t stop, not even as I came down from my high. He continued to lick and suck and tease, drawing out every last drop of pleasure until I was a boneless, sated mess beneath him.

When he finally pulled away, his lips were glistening with my release. I reached for him, pulling him up to lie beside me. Wrapping my arms around him, I pressed a kiss to his lips and tasted myself on his tongue. It was intimate and erotic, and it made me want him all over again.

Kol positioned himself between my thighs and hovered above me. I reached up, tracing the lines of his tattoos with my fingertips.

He gave me a smile then, one that set my heart ablaze, its heat spreading through my chest and down to my core. At that moment, I was acutely aware of just how perfect he was—not just physically, with his chiseled features and strong, muscular body, but in his heart. He had been so patient, taking care of me when I was at my worst.

We had only just met, but it felt like I had known him forever. My heart was his, completely and irrevocably, in a way I had never imagined possible. And when he looked at me, with that knowing glint in his eyes, I wondered if he felt it too—this magnetic pull that defied logic and time.

I watched, entranced, as he took his cock in his hand, stroking it a few times before running it along my folds, paying particular attention to my clit. The sensation ignited a spark, another orgasm already coiling in my core, ready to explode at his command.

With a tenderness that belied his size, he inched his way inside me, his eyes never leaving mine. My walls clenched around him; the fit was so deliciously tight. He lowered himself to his elbows, his body pressing against mine as he began to move.

“You’re so beautiful, Noelle,” he murmured, leaning down to capture my lips with his.

His kiss was tender, but there was a hunger beneath it that rivaled my own. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer, needing more of him.

Each of his thrusts was slow and deep, stroking against my bundle of nerves, giving me the friction that would send me over the edge. Our lips melded together as he swallowed my moans.

I dug my heels into the floor and met each of his thrusts with my own, urging him on. Our bodies moved in perfect harmony, the rhythm building with each passing moment. He was close; I could see it in the tension of his jaw, the way his muscles strained. I could also sense he was holding back, refusing to let himself go until I did. The knowledge that he was so attuned to my pleasure that he was willing to sacrifice his own for mine unleashed an inferno of need that tore through me, consuming every last bit of restraint I had.

“Kol,” I gasped, squeezing his shoulders hard. “I’m so close…”

He looked down at me, his eyes filled with an affection I’d never known. “Come for me, baby,” he murmured. “Let me feel you come.”

With all my might, I clamped down on his shaft. And with his one last thrust, my climax hit, waves of ecstasy crashing over me. Kol’s control shattered, and he tumbled over the edge with me, his body shuddering as he found his release.

He collapsed on top of me, his weight a comfort rather than a burden. His fingers tangled in my hair as he nuzzled into my neck, pressing tender kisses against my heated skin.

“You’re incredible, Noelle,” he whispered, his breath warm against my body. “I can’t get enough of you. I never want to let you go.” His words were soft, a murmur of praise that filled my heart to the brim.

In a split second, it all made sense: he was just as addicted to me as I was to him. It was there in the way he held me, in the way he touched me, in the way he looked at me like I was the only woman in the world. And although the word love lingered on the tip of my tongue, it was too soon to speak it aloud. Instead, I showed him with my touches, with my kisses, with the way I melted into him, surrendering myself completely.

My eyes fluttered closed as exhaustion swept over me. I was beyond emotionally and physically spent; my body was limp as his strong arms held me.

He pulled out of me slowly, and a soft sigh escaped my lips at the loss of contact. But before I could mourn the separation, he lifted me into his arms, cradling me against his chest like I weighed nothing at all.

The world blurred around the edges while he carried me up the stairs, the soft glow of the Christmas lights casting a kaleidoscope of colors on the walls. I hazily registered the coolness of sheets against my skin as he laid me down on the bed, tucking me in.

“Sleep, my firecracker,” he whispered, kissing my forehead. “I’ve got you.”

And with that promise hanging in the air, I let the darkness swallow me whole, slipping into the warm, comforting embrace of sleep, secure knowing that Kol would be there when I woke up.