Christmas with my Off-Limits Alpha (Feuding Hearts Christmas)

5. Ava Mooney

Ava Mooney

Chapter Five

T he familiar scent of motor oil and grease fills my nostrils as I tinker with the bike in front of me. My mind’s still reeling from the encounter with Liam, his intense blue eyes seared into my memory.

Footsteps echo in the garage. I turn, and my breath catches. Kat’s standing in the doorway, her pixie-cut, chin-length hair as wild as ever, a grin lighting up her face.

“Ava! You’re really back!” She rushes forward, enveloping me in a tight hug.

I return the embrace, breathing in the scent of leather and her signature perfume. For a moment, I’m transported to fun days before my life became a supernatural mess.

“God, I’ve missed you,” I mumble into her shoulder.

Kat pulls back, her green eyes sparkling. “So, spill. How was life on the road? Bet it was more exciting than this sleepy town.”

I force a smile, pushing down the memories of why I left in the first place. “Oh, you know, same old same old. Lots of riding, seeing new places. Nothing too crazy.”

“Come on, there’s gotta be more to it than that.” Kat hops onto the workbench, swinging her legs. “Any hot bikers catch your eye?”

My mind flashes to Liam, his strong jawline, the way his muscles ripple under his shirt. I swallow hard. “Nah, nothing worth mentioning.”

Kat’s eyebrow quirks up. “Uh-huh. Sure.”

“It’s complicated, Kat.”

She slides off the bench, coming to stand beside me. “Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to push. I just... I worry about you, you know?”

Guilt gnaws at me. Here’s my best friend, trying to help, and I’m shutting her out. But how can I explain what I am? What I can do?

I force myself to meet her eyes. “I appreciate it, Kat. Really. It’s… I guess I don’t know what I feel yet. Being back is not bad, just not what I thought it might be.”

She nods, but I see the concern lingering in her gaze. “Well, whenever you’re ready to talk, I’m here. No judgment, promise.”

If only I could be certain… My hand unconsciously moves to cover the fox tattoo on my wrist. If you knew what I really am...

Kat’s eyes narrow as she takes in my appearance. “What’s with the oil staining over your shirt? You look like you’ve been wrestling with an engine.”

I glance down, noticing the dark smears for the first time. “Oh, this? I, uh, ran into Liam earlier. We were working on his bike.”

Her eyebrows shoot up. “Liam? As in Liam Shadds? The Shadow Claw MC alpha? Your teen heartthrob? The reason you were shunted off to boarding school?”

I nod, trying to keep my expression neutral. “Yeah, that Liam.”

Kat’s face tightens, her earlier playfulness vanishing. “Ava, be careful. Getting involved with a biker like Liam... it’s not a game.”

“Who said anything about getting involved?” I snap, defensive. “We just talked about bikes.”

She sighs, running a hand through her short hair. “Look, there’s something I want to tell you. I’ve been... seeing someone. Benny Silverson.”

My jaw drops. “Benny? For how long?”

“A couple years now,” Kat admits, her voice low. “And it’s been hell, Ava. The secrecy, the constant fear of being found out. Do you know what it’s like to love someone you can’t even hold hands with in public?”

I listen, my stomach twisting.

Kat continues, her words tumbling out. “We have to sneak around, always looking over our shoulders. If the town found out, well, I don’t think townys care. But if the Shadowclaws discover us... God, Ava, it would be a disaster. And Liam’s the alpha. It would be even more complicated for you.”

“But... if you love Benny, isn’t it worth it?”

Kat’s eyes flash. “Is it worth the risk of tearing this town apart? Of putting everyone we care about in danger? Sometimes, love isn’t enough.”

Her words hit me like a punch to the gut. I think of Liam’s intense blue eyes, the way my skin tingled when he touched me. But I also think of my father, of the town’s unspoken rules. Of the secret I’m already keeping.

Kat’s eyes cloud over, her usual spark dimming as she leans against the workbench. “It’s... it’s like living two lives, Ava.”

I put down my wrench, giving her my full attention. The weight of her words settles over me like a heavy blanket.

“What do you mean?”

She runs a hand through her short hair, a gesture so familiar it makes my chest ache. “I can’t tell my family. Hell, I can barely talk to you about it. And Benny’s MC pack? They tolerate me because I’m a rider and social member in the club, but there’s always this... wall.”

I nod, understanding all too well the feeling of being an outsider. “They don’t trust you?”

“Not completely.” Kat’s laugh is bitter, hollow. “It’s like I’m allowed to peek behind the curtain, but never fully step through. And if they knew about Benny and me, I’d be persona non grata and tossed over that wall, never to return.”

As she speaks, I feel a knot forming in my stomach. Is this what awaits me with Liam? A life of secrets and half-truths? Is this how my mother lived?

“There’s always... tension,” Kat continues. “Like we’re one wrong move away from everything falling apart. The town has its rules, Ava. Unspoken, sure, but breaking them? It comes with a price.”

I swallow hard, my mouth suddenly dry. “But you still think it’s worth it?”

Kat’s eyes meet mine, a fierce determination burning in them. “For Benny? Yeah. I love him, Ava. But I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t hard.”

I nod, unable to form words. My mind is a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. Part of me admires Kat’s strength, her willingness to fight for love despite the odds. But another part recoils at the thought of living in constant fear, of always looking over my shoulder.

“How do you do it?” I finally ask. “How do you handle the pressure?”

Kat’s smile is sad, tinged with a weariness that seems out of place on her usually vibrant face. “One day at a time. And a lot of faith that what we have is worth the struggle.”

As she speaks, I picture Liam. His intense blue eyes, the way he made me feel seen in a way I haven’t in years. Is that worth the risk? The danger?

“I don’t know if I could do it,” I admit, the words barely above a whisper.

Kat reaches out, squeezing my hand. “Nobody’s asking you to, Ava.”

I nod, but inside, I’m torn. My heart pulls me toward Liam, while my mind screams caution. And underneath it all, there’s the whisper of something else—a reminder that I’m a Kitsuné, caught between two worlds, belonging to neither.

She leans against the workbench, arms crossed. “Look, I didn’t mean to dump all this on you. I just... I care about you, you know?”

“I know.” The words come out barely above a whisper. I set the wrench down, wiping my oily hands on a nearby rag. “It’s just... complicated.”

Kat snorts. “Understatement of the century.”

I crack a smile at that. It fades quickly as the reality of the situation settles back in. Why am I even thinking of getting involved with Liam? It’s dangerous and puts everyone I care about at risk. Can I handle what Kat’s describing? The secrecy, the constant fear?

But then I think about Liam, of the way my skin tingles when he touches me. Can I walk away from him?

“I don’t know what to do, Kat.” The admission feels like it’s being torn from my chest. “My head’s telling me one thing, but my heart...”

“I get it, Ava. Believe me, I do. Think about what you’re risking. There’s more than your heart on the line.”

“I know that.” The words come out sharper than I intend. I take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm of emotions raging inside me. “But what if... what if it’s worth it?”

Kat’s expression softens. “Is it? That’s something only you can decide.”

I turn away, running a hand through my hair. My fingers catch on a tangle, and I wince. It’s a small pain, but it feels like a metaphor for my life right now—all tangled up, with no clear way to unravel it.

I whisper, more to myself than to Kat. “I don’t know how to fall out of love with Liam.”

She reaches out, gripping my hand. “You have to try, Ava. For everyone’s sake. Including your own.”

“I don’t know if I can stay away from him, Kat.” The admission feels like both a relief and a weight on my chest. “I don’t want to run anymore, Kat. I’m here to stay. There’s no place else I want to be.”

I close my eyes, letting out a shaky breath. Liam’s face swims before me again—the intensity in his gaze, the way his presence fills a room. But then I think about my father, about the town, about the secret I’m already keeping.

“What if I make the wrong choice?” The question slips out before I can stop it.

Kat steps forward, wrapping me in a hug. “Then you deal with it. That’s all any of us can do.”

I lean into her embrace, feeling like a kid again—scared and unsure. But as I pull back, I catch sight of my reflection in a nearby mirror. The woman staring back at me isn’t a kid anymore. She’s strong, determined. A survivor.

“Thanks, Kat,” I murmur. “For... everything.”

She gives me a small smile. “That’s what friends are for, right?”

I nod, but inside, the war between my head and my heart rages on. Liam or safety? Passion or practicality? As I turn back to the bike, I realize I’m no closer to an answer than I was before.

“Now, what say I give you a hand on that bike? What do you diagnose, Doctor?”

We laugh and I step aside to show her what I’m working on. Friends, true friends, pick up where we leave off, no matter how many miles or years separate us.

The rumble of motorcycles cuts through our conversation like a knife. Kat and I whip our heads toward the garage entrance, the easy atmosphere evaporating in an instant. The door swings open with a bang, and my stomach drops.

Diggs Fireclaw saunters in, flanked by his Iron Wolves crew. The air thickens, charged with an undercurrent of danger. I take an involuntary step back, my fingers curling around the wrench I’d been holding.

Diggs’s dark eyes sweep the room, landing on me with predatory intensity. A slow, cruel smile spreads across his face, revealing teeth that seem too sharp to be human. “Well, well. Look what we have here.”

My throat tightens. What the hell are they doing here? This can’t be a coincidence.

I shift closer to Kat, positioning myself slightly in front of her. My voice comes out steadier than I feel. “Diggs. This is private property.”

He chuckles, the sound grating against my nerves. “Is that any way to greet old friends, Ava?”

“We’re not friends,” I snap, my grip on the wrench tightening.

Diggs takes a step forward, his gaze a lecherous leer, never leaves mine. “Maybe not. But we could be so much more.”

The implication makes my skin crawl. I force myself to stay still, to not show weakness. “What do you want?”

His eyes narrow, that predatory smile still in place. “Just checking in on the competition. Heard you might be joining the Holiday Race this year.”

My jaw clenches. How did he know that? I haven’t told anyone...

Diggs’s next words confirm he’s fishing. “Liam’s got himself a new rider, huh? Interesting choice.”

The mention of Liam’s name sends a jolt through me. I struggle to keep my face neutral, but Diggs catches the flicker of emotion. His smile widens.

“Oh, touched a nerve there, did I? You two getting cozy?”

I feel Kat tense beside me. “That’s none of your business,” she interjects, her voice hard.

Diggs’s attention snaps to her, his expression darkening. “Wasn’t talking to you, sweetheart.”

“Don’t call her that,” I growl, taking a step forward. The air around me feels charged, my Kitsuné abilities thrumming just beneath the surface. I push them down, aware that I don't know how to control actions my fox side thinks are right and I can’t risk exposing myself here.

Diggs holds up his hands in mock surrender, but his eyes are cold. “Easy there, fox. Just making conversation.”

Huh. Haven’t heard that nickname in years. What does he know? My mind races, piecing together the implications. “You should leave.” My voice is low and dangerous. “Now.”

Diggs takes another step closer, invading my personal space. I smell leather and a darker, feral odor. “Or what? You gonna make me?”

The tension in the room ratchets up another notch. I’m acutely aware of Kat behind me, of the other Iron Wolves blocking the exit. This could go bad, fast.

Just as I’m considering my options, a new voice cuts through the standoff.

“I think the lady asked you to leave.”