Cinnamon and Spice Conundrum (Cinnamon Rolls and Pumpkin Spice)

Chapter 28

Ryan

Wilbur’s fish fry is a big success, and much to my surprise Agnes and Georgeanne attend. I suspect the two ladies came mostly for the free food and to watch a man wallow in the mistakes he’s made. During the meal, while the old codgers gripe about rising prices and the lack of a stop sign on one of the main streets and the danger that creates, I eat in contrite silence.

“Tell the group why you duped us,” Wilbur says after everyone’s eaten their fill of fish. Dilbert, Stuart, Julio, and the two ladies pin me with their gazes. By the expectant looks on their faces, I wonder if this scandal is the most exciting event this crew has had to discuss in a long time.

“When I was named one of Denver’s twenty-five most eligible bachelors—”

“You were?” Agnes squeaks, fanning her face. “I knew you were a hunk!”

I grin at the interruption—though I’m not sure how to feel about a seventy-year-old thinking I’m sexy—then proceed. “As I was saying, when I got on that darn list, women came out of the woodwork. A few tried to accost me at work, and several tried to get past the concierge at my condo.”

Dilbert shakes his gray head. “Sounds like a good problem to have, if you ask me.”

“It wasn’t,” I say. “How could I trust whether these women were interested in me or if they were just interested in my money?”

Stuart, who’s been quiet up to this point, says, “Research indicates that 56 percent of singles want a partner who provides financial security more than love. The thirty or younger set particularly suffer from a lack of financial planning, so they’re seeking wealth in a partner rather than romance.”

Murmurs float around the group, agreeing with Stuart’s data dump.

Deciding not to challenge Stuart’s unattributed research, I say, “Sam knew Sadie’s barista had quit, so he convinced me to be a temporary fill-in. I worked at a coffee shop during college, so I was a natural choice. I could hide out in Pinecone Pines, help Sam’s sister, then return to Denver after a few weeks, giving women there time to forget about the list.”

“Sounds like altruistic motives,” Stuart says, and the gray-haired group nods their heads in agreement.

“Sam and I came up with the not-so-bright idea to have me masquerade as his assistant Jack. Take on Jack’s persona. I even traded vehicles with him.” What I’d give to be driving my Land Rover rather than Jack’s rust bucket.

“Did you design your dumpy outfits after what this Jack character wears?” Agnes asks.

I nod, wincing at the term dumpy, but she has a point. “Don’t get me wrong, Jack’s a great guy, but he reminds me of one of those characters in the commercial about becoming your parents.”

“I love those commercials! Dr. Rick is such an insightful therapist,” Dilbert says, as if the actor is a real counselor.

“And he’s handsome to boot,” Georgeanne adds.

“He cracks me up,” Julio chimes in.

Wilbur holds up his hand. “Let’s get back to Ryan’s story.”

Tossing Wilbur a grateful look, I clear my throat and continue. “I wanted to make sure no one would recognize me, on the off chance someone from Denver came in to the café. Looking back, I’m not sure why Sam and I didn’t let Sadie in on the ruse.”

“Big mistake,” Georgeanne says with a tsk-tsk , the group again nodding their heads in agreement .

Her comment suddenly puts me on the defensive. “I was only supposed to be a fill-in barista! Do a little fishing. Help Sadie, then return to Denver. No harm, no foul!” I exclaim.

The group stares at me wide-eyed for several seconds after my outburst.

“But?” Agnes asks, her eyes boring into mine.

My shoulders slump. “But I fell in love with Sadie.”

The group erupts, giving each other high fives, fist bumps, and an occasional slap on the back.

“What did I tell you?” Wilbur says, sporting a proud smirk.

“I was the one to point this out weeks ago,” Georgeanne says.

“It’s been obvious for a while, Ryan,” Julio adds. “The steamy looks you and Sadie give each other. Whew!”

As the group raucously debates who knew about me falling in love with Sadie first, I kick myself for the fiftieth time about not being truthful with Sadie from the onset. I wouldn’t be in this fix right now if I had been.

Clap! Clap!

Wilbur gets the group’s attention, and they fall silent. “Time to come up with the battle plan. We need ideas for what Ryan can do to get back in Sadie’s good graces.”

The geriatric crew has a raft of ideas for winning Sadie back, and they offer them excitedly.

Gift Sadie with a spa day at the Cones and Conifers Spa. Georgeanne promotes this idea as a way to get Sadie to become chill enough to listen to my apology.

“Agnes and I will be happy to accompany Sadie so we can tout your merits and ensure a successful outcome,” she says generously. Of course, this spa day will all be on my dollar.

I roll my eyes.

An “I’m sorry” serenade. “I’ll offer the services of me and my band to accompany you as you serenade Sadie outside the café,” Julio says .

I groan. “I hate to tell you, but my singing voice sounds worse than a hound dog. I doubt it will win anyone over, and I might drive Sadie’s customers away.”

Write her an apology haiku. Surprisingly, this one comes from Dilbert. Apparently he’s a recurring participant in the monthly poetry slam at the Coniferous Confections candy store. “I’m happy to assist you in writing the haiku. That’s a poetry style I haven’t explored yet,” he adds.

I pinch the bridge of my nose and sigh. Each suggestion sounds worse than the previous one.

Apology balloon bouquet. When I told the group about my epic failure with the wilted daisies, Agnes suggests this one. “The Pick and Save has a limited supply of mylar balloons, so you might have to mix in a Happy Birthday and a Congratulations on the New Baby with the I’m Sorry one,” she explains.

Why do they think any of these are good ideas?

With Wilbur taking notes on an ancient iPad, we do finally come up with what he calls the Team Ryan Battle Plan.

First on the list is for the group to personally encourage Sadie to listen to my apology. As frequent visitors to the café, they will all drop hints that I want to apologize, breaking down Sadie’s resistance. Then I will swoop in, grovel at her feet, and win her back. That’s how Agnes describes the plan—in a rather dramatic fashion—based on a Hallmark movie she watched the previous weekend.

Second will be a series of gifts, all designed to appeal to Sadie’s romantic nature. I insist that I come up with my own list of gifts, nixing all the suggestions from the group except for the spa day. Sadie could really use one of those after how hard she worked during the festival.

The group will reconvene at the cabin in two days to discuss progress. Wilbur volunteers me to provide a spaghetti dinner with all the fixings. I guess I owe them a free meal, especially if they convince Sadie to listen to my apology.