Class Clown (The Thornback Society #4)

1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Ruby's Truth: Sometimes a girl's gotta mope, sure. But keep it brief.

Swirls of water circled the drain in my miniscule bathtub, as I sighed heavily. Then I sighed once more for emphasis. Then, because it echoed so beautifully around my bathroom, I sighed again. Much like the lukewarm water draining away from my body, my hopes for a Summer of Love had slipped away. This kind of stuff did not happen to heroines, but only to side characters. Apparently, I was still a side character.

A month or so ago I’d been stopped in my tracks by Bohdi Gallager, the world’s most beautiful elementary school janitor, and for a flicker of a moment I’d seen a real shot at being the heroine in my own romance tale. Yet alas, the only thing left was the puff of smoke he had left behind. Even playing Michael Bublé’s soothing music hadn’t been able to make my heart pitter-pat again. If his smooth-as-melted-chocolate voice couldn’t do it, nothing could. It was over.

Sure, I was being slightly dramatic, but regardless of knowing better I’d fallen straight in to full on infatuation with Bohdi. I’d been helpless against his riots of dark curls, and his smokey eyes, and the loose-limbed way he’d moved about the school hallways. When he’d told me that my dark brown eyes were irresistible, and that I was different from other girls I’d fallen for it.

Gah! I knew better than to believe that line. I’d had enough experience with men who found me entertaining and unique to know that those things weren’t enough to build a true relationship on. Eyeballs were not the measuring post for true love.

Maybe it had happened because the last of my friends had found love, and I’d seen Bohdi as my chance to finally find my own Mr. Right. He’d appeared in that hallway, standing in my path, his charisma shooting straight into my vulnerable heart, and I’d cast away all the lessons I’d learned and thrown myself at his feet.

Lies. It had all been lies.

The worst part were that they were lies I’d told myself, which tended to hurt a little more than lies told by others.

Cold air hit my skin as the last of the water ran down the drain, and rather than immediately climbing out of my apartment-sized bathtub, I flopped my head backwards and - you guessed it - let out another gusty sigh. I was shivering and alone.

And honestly, getting a little bored of my own moping at this point. I’d gone whole hog on it, but now it was pep talk time.

Hadn’t all the best heroines hit rock bottom? Hadn’t they had to kiss a few frogs before their prince came along? So sue me if I’d thrown myself at a few duds, assuming they were princes in disguise. Suffering was good for the heart, and everyone who knew anything said a person could learn more from her mistakes than from her successes.

I counted to ten, picturing myself rising up to face the world again, before standing up and grabbing my fluffy pink towel off the countertop.

My phone began to buzz as I finished drying off. I wrapped the towel around myself and stepped onto the bathmat, immediately knocking the side of my knee on the toilet lid as I leaned toward the phone where it was resting on the counter. For one heart-pounding moment I expected it to be Bodhi calling to tell me that our connection was real. He’d felt my angst across the universe and was answering the call. He’d been wrong, we were fated to be together. Our dark moment would now resolve.

Honestly, I was pretty quick to forget my pep talk.

I scrambled to swipe the screen with still-wet fingertips and answered with a breathless, “Hello?”

“I need you to come to Arizona for the summer.”

The voice was not Bodhi’s. It was my younger brother Cole, and as usual there had been no warm-up before the request. No, hello, or other warm greeting. And if we’re being precise, it hadn’t even been a request, but more like a directive. Because he’s the youngest.

I sat down on the closed toilet lid, my wet hair slapping against my back. “Nope.”

He’d interrupted a perfectly deep and fulfilling self-reflection session and I wasn’t interested in whatever shenanigans he’d found himself in. A girl needed to spend a minute pulling herself up from rock bottom before she could crawl back out and have hope for her ongoing search for Mr. Right. I also needed to start all over because the fact I’d excitedly hoped it was Bodhi was a bit of a problem.

“Rubes, I’m serious.”

“So am I.”

He huffed; a big whoosh of air meant to convey his desperation. Cole was often desperate, and it would not be considered exaggeration to say his calls always caused a few ripples in my world. Every family has that one member that cannot settle into adulthood gracefully, and he was ours. We’d all been raised in the same house, with the same life instruction, but he’d been the Teflon Kid, letting all those lessons bounce off him. He lived in a perpetual state of near-poverty, and seemed happy about it until he wasn’t - and that’s when the phone calls came. He could have been calling for a million different reasons and I was never sure if it would improve my life or throw it into turmoil, but I did know that he wasn’t messing up my summer. Bodhi had already done that, and I sure didn’t need two men stomping on my dreams.

“Mom says you haven’t found a summer job yet,” he stated.

Ugh. I sank into a slouch and rested my elbows on my knees. My long, still wet, hair draped forward and tickled at my arms.

“Thanks for the reminder,” I replied sourly.

I always got a summer job - because let’s be super real about the fact that an elementary school nurse position pays enough to keep a girl in baked potatoes and butter noodles, but doesn’t exactly bring home any bacon. I always supplemented with summer income. However, due to having been sucked in by a pretty thing named Bodhi Gallagher, I’d been too busy daydreaming about our epic Summer of Love to get around to job hunting.

That made me a fool twice over. And I did not like feeling foolish .

“Ruby?” Cole broke the silence. I made a non-committal noise. “Why aren’t you working?”

“I had summer plans,” I replied, grumpily, reflecting on that moment two short days ago when Bodhi had disappeared from town with only a text saying he’d ‘catch me on the flip side’.

What did that even mean? I mean, I know what it means, but really? Who says that? Flip this side, Bodhi. Catch this , Bodhi.

“Had?” Cole sounded rudely happy about the past tense.

“Might still have.” This was a lie. I had no plans at all. Unless you count eating cinnamon rolls morning, noon, and night a plan – which I technically did, because delicious.

“Is this about a guy?”

I scoffed. “Not everything is about a guy.”

He made a humming noise. “In my experience with you, it’s usually about a guy.”

“It recently ended.”

“Well, can you afford not to work? Because I can pay you.”

“Come again?”

He chuckled. “I can pay you if you’ll come.”

Hmmm. I was going to have to find a job, and the pickings would be slim since I’d waited this long. I sat up, suddenly remembering my mom mentioning something about Cole working at a sleep-away camp for kids. I was always interested in what Cole was doing, but didn’t necessarily think much about it because his employment changed so frequently. And honestly, I did my best to not get sucked into his schemes, but money coming to me rather than toward him was new.

“You can pay me?” I clarified. “Because it usually goes the other way.”

“I’ll ignore the dig and assure you that you will be paid.”

I wiggled my toes on the cold black-checked linoleum and considered the uncomfortable fact that heartbreak can’t be redeemed at grocery stores for actual food.

“How, exactly, would you pay me?” I asked, intrigued because he’d poked at a weak spot. “And why Arizona? Last I heard you were living by Mom and Dad and doing some sort of kid’s camp counselor gig.”

“I was, but that same company runs a summer sleep-away camp in Arizona and hired me to be their camp director. ”

I tried really hard, I did, but my voice came out heavy with skepticism. “You’re in charge of an entire summer camp filled with dependent children and other staff?”

“Yes, Rubes.” I could picture his eye roll. “I’m a capable adult. Look, I happen to know that all your best friends are coupled up and you’re going to want to hang with them all summer, but they’ll be too busy, and you’ll wish you’d taken a summer job after all. You’re going to be bored.”

Stung, I huffed, “Only boring people get bored, Cole.”

The silence stretched for a second and I could practically hear his brain working on his next angle. I reached behind me to flush the toilet. No, I hadn’t actually used it, but I knew he would think I had and I was looking to poke back.

“What was that noise?” he asked.

“I’m in the bathroom.”

He grumbled. “Gross. I don’t want to talk to you when you’re in the bathroom.”

“Then don’t call when I’m in the bathroom.”

“How about don’t answer when you’re in the bathroom?”

Getting under his skin was improving my mood. “Unless you can provide me with life altering information about why you need me in Arizona, and how you’re going to actually pay me money, and make it more tempting than a summer here with my friends, I’m hanging up on you.”

“The camp is called Camp Windsong and it’s outside of Flagstaff. The state that a registered nurse be on site all summer.”

“And you thought to find a nurse, what, a couple of weeks before it starts?” Now it was my turn to laugh. “Nice, Cole.”

“I had one on staff, actually. But her dad had a stroke last week and is going to need in-home care for a while. She’d signed on with the camp, so technically I could have forced it, but I’m not that guy. Family first, right?” I nodded even though he couldn’t see me. “So, I’ve been reaching out to a few people, but most RN’s have jobs in a health care system that doesn’t allow them to be off for three months. Then, I thought of you.”

“Who is off for three months.” I left the bathroom and sat down on the edge of my bed, feeling a little less resistant to his request as I sank into the soft comforter.

“Mom said you should be free. ”

Kids were my weakness. I couldn’t ruin their camp dreams. It’s a simple fact that nature heals, and as a nurse I’m not out here trying to stand in the way of healing. And even though Cole was a jerk level ten for reminding me my friends would be busy with their boyfriends and lives this summer, he wasn’t wrong. I flopped back in my bed, Bodhi’s face flashing before my eyes. The reality was that I could use a distraction. Something exciting and different. Not necessarily because I was heartbroken, but because I could recognize the stink of stagnation on myself.

Same Ruby, same location, up to her same tricks. Find a cutie, flirt, go on a few dates, and get let down before it really went anywhere. It had become my only hobby, really. What a shock that nothing had changed in my life for a very long time. Maybe I could use a jump start in a new direction.

“When does camp start?” I asked.

“Next week. But I need you here in three days. Me and some of the staff are already on site. You’ll need time to set up the health center and take some employee safety trainings.”

“Three days?” I groaned.

“Does this mean you’re in?”

“Give me a minute to weigh my options,” I muttered.

Pros: Kids, nature, a job, adventure, no memories of Bodhi and my other failed attempts at love lingering around.

Cons: Distance from my Thornback besties, having my brother be my boss.

“Do it for the kids, Rubes. Imagine their little faces surrounded by mountains and wildflowers,” he nudged. “Starry nights, campfire songs, s’mores.”

“I do like those things.”

“Please say yes, Ruby. I need you.”

Dagger.

“Alright,” I replied, and grinned at his cheer.

“Send me over a copy of your nursing license, your driver’s license, and verification of your school district employment. I also need your social security number for a background check.”

“And bank information for pay?” I asked, my tone firm. “I’m not doing this for free.”

“Someone else will get with you about that, but yes, you’re getting paid. ”

A tiny flare of hope lit my chest. “When nothing goes right, go left, I suppose.”

His laugh was warm. “Thanks so much for this. And, who knows, maybe this guy will recognize his mistake and still be there when you return in August.”

I smiled to myself. “He won’t. But that’s okay. He was never the real thing.”

Cole offered a comforting word, promised to send me more details, and said goodbye.

So, yeah. I was going to summer camp.

The crunching of a plastic tarp being walked on woke me from a restless sleep three days later. The same tarp that I’d pulled over me in the night to minimize condensation in my sleeping bag had now become my alarm clock. I kept my eyes closed, pondering on if some of my registered nurse knowledge could help me slightly maim my baby brother. I took a deep breath, and when the frigid morning air attempted to ice my lungs, I coughed hard. Frowning, I wiggled farther down into my bag and felt a tug at my hair. That was strange. I shifted my head sideways and the pillow moved with it. Hmm. Not normal. I snaked a hand out of and felt around, assessing the situation, only to realize that my long hair was full of ice chunks and was now stuck to my damp pillow. A good morning indeed.

I opened my eyes, blinking a few times as the rising sun attempted to blind me, and took in my surroundings. Azure blue sky, deep green pines, and zero clouds. Every experienced camper knew that a clear night like we’d had would make for chilly overnight temperatures, but my idiot brother had taken it one step further by setting up our sleeping area next to a stream. The moisture from the water had clearly floated over to us and created an ice trap. Glorious.

The tarp over me crunched again as footsteps neared, and I rotated my eyes to meet the grinning face of that genius younger brother of mine. He looked pretty snug in a red coat and black beanie, but the hem of his jeans and the toes of his hiking boots were definitely covered in dew. I hoped they sprang a leak and he had raging frostbite by the end of the day. I would refuse him treatment.

“Morning Rube,” Cole chirped. “It’s sure brisk.”

Brisk is an old-person word used when they’re delighted by the iciness of the air. Brisk is seventy-six-year-old Barb coming in from her morning walk with pink cheeks and sparkling eyes, telling her husband Harry about the weather and how he should enjoy it before things start to heat up. Brisk was not the mood I was in.

I decided to let my predicament speak for itself, so I simply sat up, and watched his dark, up-turned eyes grow large as my pillow followed me, matted to my head, one side dangling and tugging at my scalp.

“Oh,” he moved closer, pulling a face. “Yikes.”

“Just had to camp near water, huh?” I asked.

“The running water is a soothing sound to fall asleep to.”

I nodded. “Yeah. Made me have to use the bathroom all night. Now I’m wondering what antibiotic I’ll need for the UTI that will be caused by my dangerously over-full bladder.”

“Why didn’t you go to the bathroom?”

I sighed. “So many reasons. A, I’m a woman and the forest is not my toilet, which means, B, I’d have had to find a bathroom, and C, while I was walking in the forest I might have seen glowing eyes looking back at me in the dark, which would have caused me to empty my bladder on the trail.” I shot him a look. “I’m still trying to understand why we couldn’t sleep in our cabin. Or at least in a tent?”

“The fumigation was supposed to be done before you arrived. Sorry, sis,” he replied as he squatted down, the soles of his shoes squeaking against the dew-covered tarp. “I’ve been camping here for and thought it would be okay. Want me to free you?”

I slouched. “Yes, I really do. While you’re doing that, think on the fact that I’m pulling out of our contract and you’re on your own.”

He tapped my shoulder. “No can do. It’s legal and binding. Don’t make me sue you.”

I scoffed. “I’ll arm wrestle you for it.”

He yanked lightly on my hair and the pillow shifted its weight. “That might have worked ten years ago.”

“You might be bigger than me these days, but I’m still tougher and have righteous anger on my side. ”

He laughed, working the strands free. “Which is exactly why I need you at camp. Angry nurses are the best kind.” With one last yank my pillow fell to the ground. “There you go. No big deal.”

“Says the guy who has short hair and wore a beanie last night.”

“It gets cold,” he joked as he stood, his expression telling me how much he was enjoying this.

I rubbed at my eyes. “I need a hot drink.”

“Guess I owe you that.”

He moved away and I kicked my feet inside my sleeping bag, hoping to warm them up before standing on them. I looked around the field and took in the scene. It was as beautiful this morning as I’d imagined it would be when I’d arrived at dusk the night before after a whirlwind packing adventure. I’d arranged for my friends to check on my apartment, and headed to the mountains, not knowing what to expect.

It was kind of magical here, actually. Romantic in a way.

I got excited wondering once more what to expect, and coming up with possibilities. I knew that Windsong was a sleep-away camp for kids ages eight to sixteen and that each session ran from Sunday afternoon through Friday mid-morning, with the camp closed from Friday at noon to Sunday at noon. I was still a bit fuzzy on how Cole had landed the job. Sure, from his point of view it had all the things he loved. It was seasonal, requiring no long-term commitment, was outdoors, and he got to be a social butterfly. However, I didn’t see him being orderly, disciplined, and handling the business details very well.

And kids? They are wonderful, a gift from heaven, and the future of our world, sure. They’re also masterminds of diabolical thinking, and will come for you when you least expect it, sneaking past your defenses and rewarding you with surprises you never wanted. Did he know to be on guard?

When I’d expressed some concerns about a Lord of the Flies situation, he’d assured me that he had an assistant director, and a head cook, and a bunch of counselors to handle the kids and teach the classes. So, yeah, this wasn’t some rinky-dink campout. In fact, it appeared to be a legit, nationally accredited camp. I’d had to interview with someone above him, provide documentation showing I was an actual practicing RN, and pass a background check, so that was something. Also, I’d be getting paid. It was pennies thanks to them providing room and board, but it was something, and my bank account needed whatever it could get.

He had said all the right words, but I was still waiting to see if I’d somehow end up as his secret background director and run the camp for him while he frolicked in the reservoir and shot kids with water guns. We’d been down that path before. But the need to pay my bills had won out this time.

I shivered and received a cramping reminder that it was time to use the facilities. I crawled out of my bag, tugged on my freezing cold hiking boots, and made my way across the meadow to a big gathering area where Cole was standing near the camp fire pit, heating water on a grate over the flames.

“It’s been a long time since the two of us got to spend a summer together,” he said. “Cheers to this being amazing.”

I mean, I wouldn’t call it amazing so far. Amazing wouldn’t involve a cabin that required fumigation and having to camp under the stars in freezing temps. Oh, and did I forget to mention that I’d be sharing the infested cabin with my brother? Something he’d forgotten to tell me until last night. Apparently, when they’d found out we were siblings, they’d shuffled me in to bunk up with Cole and solved some sort of numbers issue by doing so.

Exactly what a thirty-two-year-old woman wants - to share bunk space with her twenty-eight-year-old brother. I sincerely hoped the stinky cave smell of teenage boy years had passed, because I wasn’t looking forward to having to spritz air-freshener all summer.

“It’s pretty here, I’ll give you that. It’ll be even prettier when you tell me all about the lovely flushing toilet nearby,” I said as I approached him, rubbing my hands together.

He rolled his shoulders and neck before looking over the field area where we’d camped. “Just think, pretty soon this field will be full of kids and counselors, having the time of their lives.”

I followed his gaze until mine landed on the log building he’d pointed out as ours. “Is there a bathroom in our cabin?”

“Sure is.”

“Oh my gosh, thank goodness.” I took a few steps in that direction and then remembered why we were out there in the first place. “What, exactly, needed to be fumigated?” I asked .

His eyes lit up in anticipation of my reaction. “Bed bugs and termites.”

“How splendid,” I replied, suddenly caring a little less about the ice still dangling from the ends of my hair. “Don’t these temperatures freeze them out?”

He shrugged. “How should I know?”

I puffed out a big breath. “Cole, the camp director should probably know that stuff.”

“Well, the director does know that you’d be better off using the toilet in the main lodge. It’s the biggest building and the sign over the door says ‘Bearadise’. Go in the front door, hook a left down the hallway, and you’ll find it. It’s right past the staff bunk area.”

I’d started walking, but at his last words I turned slightly. Which to address first. The fact that the name Bearadise made me ridiculously happy, or the fact that there were beds in there. Obviously, I went with beds.

“There’s a bunk room in the lodge?” I asked.

“Yeah. But the cook staff and maintenance crew sleep there.”

I bit my lip and gave him laser-beam sibling death eyes. “So, we could have slept in there?”

“The beds were all full.”

“Mmm-hmm. But the building is usable and we could have maybe put sleeping bags on the floor and been warm?”

“Now that you mention it . . .”

I threw my hands in the air and stomped away. Day one of Not Summer of Love was off to a great start.