Cocky Secrets (Cocker Brothers #29)

101. Luke

ONE HUNDRED ONE

Luke

G rabbing a bunch of clothes takes no time since I’ve done it so damn often. My toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, razor, they’re always ready in a small leather bag I carry on the road.

The porch is quiet when I walk out. Only Mom and Sage are waiting. They stand as I drop my saddlebags near the steps. Mom fiddles with her necklace as she walks to me, long red hair streaked with silver and straight as mine. “Your father is dying inside, he hates to have you go. He couldn’t wait here with us, he’s so upset.”

“I know, Mom. I saw him fighting for me. He’s just trying to keep the code.”

“He’d be here to say goodbye, but he has a problem softening.”

“He’s not supposed to be soft. He’s who he is.”

She gives this sad smile. “You know I love that about him. It’s just, this is tearing him up and I want you to know that. We both will miss you so much.”

If they knew Atlas had thrown me under the bus, I don’t know what they would do. But I won’t do to my brother what he did to me. If I don’t stand by my own integrity, I’m nothing. I decide the man I’m going to be, and nobody, not even my brother, can take that away.

Pulling Sage into a hug, I kiss her head, “Watch after Mom.”

“I will. And Atlas is here, too.”

“You need to do it, okay? Because I know you can. No matter how cute and short you are.”

She hits my chest, tears in her eyes. “Shut up.”

“You shut up,” I offer her the best smile I can, but it’s not much.

Have to pull Mom in for the next hug. Her arms fly around me and she squeezes like she won’t let go. “I love you, Luke, please call me every day.”

“I’m not going to do that.”

“Can’t you just pretend?”

“No, I can’t lie to you.” Letting her go I hoist my bags onto my shoulder, walk down the creaky old steps for my bike, still parked far up the drive where we left them.

Mom calls out, “Luke!” and I look back, slowing down. “I love you.”

Chewing on my lips I nod, “Love you, too.” My eyes catch movement upstairs as a curtain opens. Celia’s watching me from their bedroom window. She touches the glass and I throw my chin up to her in goodbye.

At our bikes I slow down because there sits my father, the darkness and my mood cloaking him until just now. “Dad?”

“Where you headed?”

“Don’t know. Don’t care.”

“You gassed up?”

“You took it out on a beer run.”

“Oh yeah.”

I check out the gauge. “Enough to get me out of Louisiana.”

“You got a credit card?”

“The club’s. You want me to use it?”

His eyes flash. “Yes, I want you to fuckin’ use it! You think I’m throwing you on the streets with no way to eat? Use the card. Let’s see how much you can piss off Jett by buying stupid shit.” We both awkwardly smile. “Use the card, Luke. Don’t starve. Stay in any hotel you need. Best they have. Get her out of your system.”

My mouth goes dry. “She’s not in my system. She’s just a friend.”

“I don’t buy that. Out here Jett’s not listenin’, so I’m gonna tell you what I see. Sofia Sol has you by the balls, just like she has any single man who comes near her. She’s powerful, capable. When we’re on a job we never have to worry if she’ll carry her weight. And on top of that she looks how she looks. How could you not have done what you did? What I’m saying is, I understand how this went down. Between you and me, I’m surprised you showed as much restraint as you have. But I watched you, son, and I know you care for her more than you should.” He pokes my chest. “Get her out of here . Go find someone like your Mom, that’s what you need. Someone like my Meg. Life is more than I ever thought it could be because of her. You go out and find that kind of woman for yourself. One who’ll stick by you through all the bad shit and make you feel more like a man.”

He pulls me in for a quick, gruff hug, and releases me as quickly as he grabbed me. I give his shoulder a slap and throw my bags over the back of my Harley.

“Let us know where you end up.”

“I won’t stay in one place.”

“I thought the same about Nevada City.”

The strap on my helmet slides into position, and I start my engine. “What if I get the Ciphers out of my system instead? Ever thought of that?”

“Yeah, I thought about it.” He starts for the plantation, fog rolling in over the grass in both directions, the driveway cutting it down the middle.

“And?” I call after him.

He calls over his shoulder, “It’s not possible.”