Cosy Nights & Snowball Fights (Little Duck Pond Cafe #36)

CHAPTER TWENTY

‘Are you okay?’ Ellie asked.

‘Er... no. Not really,’ I said shortly without thinking. I could feel myself simmering inside with a mixture of panic and fury. Then I saw the confusion on Ellie’s face. ‘Sorry. I didn’t mean to snap like that. It’s just... well, it’s not someone I wanted to hear from – ever.’

‘Right.’

I sighed. ‘It’s my mother – my biological mother, that is. And it’s... well, it’s complicated.’

Ellie gave a sympathetic smile. ‘I thought your real mum was lovely,’ she said, and I felt the tears well up at that. Ellie understood. That’s exactly what Sally was – my real mum . She was the complete opposite of Jackie, the heartless, selfish woman who’d given birth to me... the woman who now clearly thought she could write me a letter saying how sorry she was for everything and pleading for my forgiveness, and that would make everything all right...

‘There’s only one place this letter deserves to be,’ I said, tearing it up. ‘And that’s in the bin.’ With a bitter smile at Ellie, I marched through to the kitchen, threw the ripped-up letter in the pedal bin there and banged on the lid to emphasise the point.

Forget about it, Laurel! Don’t let that woman have any power over you!

Arranging a smile on my face, I walked out onto the café floor and greeted a pair of customers at the counter, talking almost on auto pilot.

In my mind, though, I was still fuming about Jackie and recalling the day she wrecked what should have been one of the proudest days of my life...

*****

I’d invited Jackie to my graduation ceremony.

We’d been growing closer over the years that she’d been sober, and she’d even come round to the house for dinner a few times. She always made an effort, dressing in skinny jeans and a pretty top, her make-up perfectly applied, dark hair newly dyed. And Mum and Dad warmed to her. She made them laugh and she was good company. She’d always been good company when she was sober.

When I broached the subject with Mum and Dad, they agreed immediately that I should invite Jackie if I could get a third ticket, so I did, and Jackie seemed to be over the moon that I’d thought of her. She was worried about what to wear, though, so we went shopping together and spent a lovely afternoon together, giggling like teenagers and trying things on. Being so slim and attractive, Jackie looked good in pretty much everything, but she eventually settled on a silky, lilac and cream polka dot shirt-waister and cream heels. The knee-length dress was rather prim for her, but she looked amazing and I found myself feeling quite proud of her and really looking forward to my graduation day.

The day arrived.

We were picking Jackie up in Dad’s car and driving her to the ceremony. But when we got to the house, there was no answer. My heart sinking with foreboding, I kept knocking and I eventually let myself in using the key she kept under a plant pot.

Upstairs, I found her crashed out on the bed fully-clothed, stinking of alcohol and the remains of a couple of spliffs on the bedside table. Her new dress was hanging up on the wardrobe door, all ready for the occasion. But she was clearly in no state to do anything that day, let alone attend my graduation ceremony.

Choked with disappointment, I left a glass of water by her bed and went back out to the car. I told Mum and Dad it would just be the three of us as Jackie was drinking again, and I could tell they were sad for me.

We drove there in silence and I sat in the back, biting hard on my lip so I wouldn’t cry. I should have realised Jackie would let me down all over again.

But worse was to happen.

Later, the ceremony over, we were standing in the grand hall sipping drinks, the three of us, along with all the other graduates and their proud parents, when I heard someone call my name.

We looked over and there was Jackie, framed in the doorway, posing with her hand on her hip. ‘Hey, everyone, that’s my daughter over there,’ she slurred. ‘Isn’t she lovely? She’s ashamed of me, though. Aren’t you, Laurel?’

I stared at her in horror. Everyone was looking at her. And at us. It was blindingly obvious she’d woken up and started drinking again immediately and all I could think was how quickly could we bundle her out of there before she caused even more of a scene?

We hurried over to her to minimise the damage, but not before she’d staggered towards us, swiped a glass of bubbly off a passing waiter’s tray then flung out her arm shouting, ‘Congratulations!’ and knocked the loaded tray to the floor in an excruciating shattering of glass.

Mum and I managed to steer her, protesting, out to the car, while Dad stayed behind apologising to everyone, guests and staff alike.

It was all my fault for inviting her.

Jackie had ruined what should have been one of the best days of my life.

But then, I should have known that she would...

*****

Later, a few minutes before closing time, I was wiping down tables while Ellie mopped the floor, when the bell on the door jangled.

Ellie glanced at her watch and I thought she was going to apologise and say we were closing. But seeing who it was, she smiled broadly and said, ‘Come in! Come in!’

I spun round – and there was Marcus.

Josh followed close behind, and at the sight of him, I felt my heart pick up speed.

Marcus glanced around him, and spotting the gaily flashing tree in the corner, his eyes widened. ‘Should we be thinking about decorating the radio station, Josh?’

Josh grinned. ‘Definitely. In fact, I think you should do your show from now till Boxing Day in full Santa Claus gear.’

‘What a good idea,’ said Ellie. ‘I can actually imagine you doing that, Marcus.’

I chuckled. ‘You’d definitely suit the long flowing beard.’

Marcus grinned, the showman in him looking as if he rather liked the idea. ‘Actually, I did play the cheery, red-cheeked fella a few times on the Christmas cruises. I was suitably jolly and I actually really enjoyed it.’ Maddy had told me that Marcus once worked as part of the entertainment team on various cruise liners.

‘I bet you did,’ said Josh and I, at exactly the same time.

I exchanged a glance with Josh and we both laughed.

‘Sorry, Ellie, are you closing up?’ asked Marcus.

‘Well, we are, but that doesn’t mean you can’t come in and have a coffee before I do.’ She attacked a set of muddy boot prints by the counter – customers had been tramping in snow off the village green all day long – then she set the mop aside and pointed to a table in the window. ‘If you sit over there, most of my floor will stay nice and clean. Maddy’s in the back somewhere. I’ll go and get her –’

‘It’s okay. I’ll get her.’ With a brief smile at Marcus and Josh, I escaped into the kitchen.

I remained there, stacking the dishwasher and tidying up, and trying not to listen to the conversation Maddy and Ellie were having with Marcus and Josh while they drank their coffee. There was a lot of laughter going on and a part of me was wishing I was there, too. But something was holding me back from chatting naturally to Josh again.

Or rather, some one .

I stood there, tea towel in my hands, staring out of the window and wondering who the someone was. Was it Gavin who was holding me back? He’d destroyed my trust in men so of course it was. But in that case, wasn’t it really me who was holding me back from admitting to myself that I liked Josh. Really liked him. The problem was, I was looking at Josh through a faulty lens... a lens that was warped by Gavin’s horrendous deception...

Maddy popped her head round the door. ‘Ellie says to leave whatever you’re doing until tomorrow and get yourself home.’

‘Oh. Okay.’

‘What were you doing, anyway?’ She glanced around.

‘Oh, just tidying up.’

‘Okay, well, grab your coat.’ She grinned. ‘I really don’t trust Marcus when there’s snow around. Honestly, he’s like a big kid. He’s gone but I saw the twinkle in his eye and I’m certain he’s planning something, so I’d rather we went out there in force, just in case.’

I did as she said and collected my coat and bag from the cupboard. ‘Has Josh gone as well?’

‘Well, yes.’ She threw me a mischievous look. ‘Why would you need to know that?’

I didn’t reply, just shrugged with a mysterious smile.

We said goodbye to Ellie and walked out into the snowy winter wonderland together.

I scanned the empty village green and shrugged. ‘They must have gone. There’s absolutely no one around,’ I pointed out – a second before a snowball whizzed past me and a second hit Maddy on the back.

‘Bloody Marcus! I knew it!’ shouted Maddy, brushing off the snow and turning. ‘Watch out, Laurel!’ She pointed. ‘They’re behind that tree beside the café.’

I looked round and sure enough, there were Marcus and Josh, laughing like two naughty schoolboys as they rolled up more snow and patted it in their hands ready to hurl at us.

‘Right, I’m warning you, boys. This is a battle I’m not prepared to lose,’ called Maddy. ‘We’re coming for you!’

She started gathering up handfuls of snow, forming balls and hurling them back at our opponents. Most of them fell short, but then finally she sent one flying that hit Marcus on the arm when he wasn’t looking. And then it was an outright battle of the sexes, with the two of us versus the two of them, haring around the green, out of breath and cheering madly at any victory, however modest.

At one point, while Josh and Marcus were in a temporary huddle, building their store of icy weapons and talking tactics, Maddy – who was standing a short distance behind them – grinned at me, put a finger to her lips and ran up to them. Shouting ‘boo!’ at close quarters, they both spun round in surprise and Josh lost his balance and fell backwards, landing on his butt on a handy pillow of snow that looked as if it might have been a snowman in a previous existence. Seizing the advantage, I stood over Josh, grinning and brandishing a snowball as he held up his hands to defend himself in laughing protest. I wasn’t intending to do anything with it, but Maddy suddenly collided with me and I found myself slipping over in the snow and almost landing on top of Josh. And then we were all laughing.

Poor Josh looked soaked through, although he was taking it all in good spirits, I thought, as I lay spreadeagled in the snow, unable to get up because I was helpless with laughter.

‘I think we’re the winners,’ I squeaked, as I watched Maddy aim three snowballs at Marcus in quick succession and hit the bullseye every time.

I liked that Josh was so relaxed and laid-back and good-humoured by nature. I also liked his smile and his runner’s physique, plus the cute way he raked his dark hair back from his forehead when he was trying to think of a witty reply, as he was doing now...

‘We’re definitely the winners!’ shouted Maddy, holding her thumb up at me.

Still laughing, Josh and I got up and brushed ourselves down, then we all trudged exhausted across the green.

‘I’m so hot after all that running around,’ said Maddy.

Marcus grinned. ‘Make the most of it, my dear, because it’s going to be minus two degrees tonight.’

‘Is it?’ I shuddered at the thought. I’d contacted my landlady and left a message explaining I couldn’t get the central heating to work, but so far, she hadn’t got back to me. ‘I guess it’s the log-burner for me again tonight.’

‘Nice.’ Josh smiled, falling into step with me and making my heart leap around wildly. ‘I always think log-burners are such a luxury.’

‘Actually, it’s a necessity at the moment. Without it I’d probably need to dig out my sleeping bag to watch TV in.’

‘No central heating?’ He looked surprised.

‘It’s probably me,’ I told him sheepishly. ‘I can’t get the hang of the thermostat. It was set on a timer when I arrived here in March and working brilliantly, but now...’ I shrugged. ‘Still, it’s a great excuse to keep using the log-burner.’

Josh frowned. ‘It might be something really simple.’

I nodded. ‘When you know, you know. But when you don’t...’

‘True. Erm... I could have a look at it if you like?’

‘Oh.’ I looked at him in surprise. It was certainly tempting. I’d no idea when my landlady was going to get back to me.

He shrugged. ‘I’ve wrestled with a few thermostats in my time. I’m happy to give it a go.’

I smiled at him, feeling suddenly shy. ‘That’s so kind of you.’ My cheeks were glowing and I knew it wasn’t just because of the snowball fight.

‘I could come over now if you like? Unless you’ve got something on.’

‘No, no. I very rarely have something on.’ Realising that made me sound very boring indeed, I added hastily, ‘I’m quite new to Sunnybrook so I’m just getting to know people. And the good places to go.’ Could March be considered ‘quite new’?

‘Right, well, why don’t we go back to your place and you can show me your thermostat?’

‘That’s the kinkiest chat-up line I’ve ever heard,’ Maddy whispered to Marcus, and I swung round to give her the evils. She was trying not to laugh. Luckily, Josh didn’t appear to have heard, so that was a relief.

I smiled at Josh. ‘That would be great. Do you want to follow me in your car?’

‘Only thing is, Marcus drove me over. My car’s back at the radio station.’

‘No problem. I’ll drive you over there later.’

‘Right. Lead on.’ He got into the passenger seat and we said our goodbyes to Maddy and Marcus. Cue raised eyebrows and suggestive winks at me over the roof of my car from Maddy, followed by a big double thumbs-up. Marcus was already striding away and seemed totally oblivious to her antics, which was just as well. She had to run, slithering in the snow, to catch him up.

‘Phew, is it hot in here or is it me?’ I flapped the neck of my T-shirt.

‘I think it’s you.’ Josh threw me an amused look. ‘It probably means you had to work a lot harder than me to win that snowball fight.’

I snorted. ‘Er, I don’t think so. It just means I’m fitter than you and my perspiration system is in better working order to cool me down.’

‘It’s not working very well, then,’ he pointed out. ‘Your personal cooling system.’

‘It just takes a bit of time to kick in, that’s all.’ I flapped my T-shirt again, met his eyes and we both started to laugh. I was sure my cheeks must be as vibrant as a freshly-plucked Discovery apple.

‘On a scale of one to ten, that BS of mine was an easy eleven,’ I said as I started the car. ‘It’s obvious you’re a great deal fitter than me with your morning runs.’

‘Well, I try, although some days when the alarm goes off, I just ignore it. But I’m doing the London Marathon next year so I can’t really afford to slack off.’

I nodded. ‘Impressive.’

There was a lull in the conversation as I put the car in gear and we set off. Josh’s nearness in the confined space of the car was making me weirdly nervy and I racked my brain for something to say.

‘So you don’t go out running every morning, then?’

He gave me a mischievous look. ‘Depends what else I feel like doing.’

‘Oh. Right.’ I swallowed. If my cheeks weren’t already on fire, they certainly would be now. Was he implying what I thought he was?

‘I mean, there are some mornings I wake up and I think forget the run, there’s something else I’d much rather be doing right now.’

‘Yes?’ I risked a look over.

He grinned. ‘Reading thrillers. I’m a big fan.’

‘Thrillers. Right. Yes, I like police procedurals myself.’

‘They’re good, too. Your traditional whodunnits?’

‘Exactly. I love a good mystery.’

‘But not necessarily the mystery of why the central heating won’t work?’

I laughed, having just about calmed down from imagining what Josh liked to get up to in bed in the mornings. ‘Not keen on that particular storyline, no.’

‘Very nice,’ said Josh as I turned into the lane and parked outside my little cottage.

‘It’s compact but perfect for one.’

As it turned out, Josh couldn’t get the central heating to work, either, which made me feel a little less useless. (I’d been terrified he’d just click a button and go, ‘There! Working fine! What was the problem?’) There was a message on my phone from my landlady saying she’d be round after six that evening to look at it.

I glanced at my watch. It was almost six now, so I explained the situation to Josh and he said he was fine to wait until she’d been because obviously, I wouldn’t want to miss her visit by driving him back to the radio station.

So I made coffee and we sat across from each other at the little table in the kitchen, and Josh told me all about his work and how he was learning the ropes from Marcus.

‘You’ll be a real live celebrity one day.’

He laughed. ‘God, I hope not.’

‘But your dream is to be a radio presenter, isn’t it?’

He shrugged. ‘The industry excites me although I’m not sure I’d be good enough to be behind the mic, so to speak. We’ll just have to see. But I hate that term, “celebrity”.’

‘I know what you mean. You don’t have to be particularly talented to be a “celebrity” these days. And so many people seem to want to be famous, as if that would be sure to transform their life for the better.’

‘Exactly.’

We exchanged a smile and a warmth crept through me. It seemed we were in tune about some things, at least. And there was lots more to find out about him. I glanced at my watch. It was after seven and still no landlady. ‘Do you... would you like some pasta while we’re waiting?’

He looked surprised.

I was surprised myself, to be honest.

I hoped he wouldn’t think my offer was a come-on, because it really, really wasn’t. I was off men for the duration and I should make that clear. Otherwise, he might get totally the wrong idea...

‘I mean, it’s not like I’m inviting you for dinner or anything.’

‘No, of course not.’

‘It would just be new friends getting to know each other a bit better?’

‘Sounds perfect.’

I nodded, relieved. ‘It’s nothing special, I’m afraid. Just a shop-bought sauce. Spicy.’

He grinned. ‘You just said the magic word so it’s a no-brainer.’

‘You like spicy?’

His eyes held mine a little longer than was completely necessary. ‘I like spicy.’

I swallowed and lurched to my feet. ‘Great. Good. So do I. Right, I’ll just put the kettle on to boil for the pasta. Now, pasta. What have I got? Oh, yes, it’s those little bow things at the moment.’ I reached into the cupboard and waggled the packet about, without turning. ‘Is that all right for you?’ I was fully aware I was prattling on nervously, but there was something in those green eyes of his that made me act weirdly!

I heard him chuckle and push back his chair. ‘Farfalle.’

‘For what, sorry?’ I turned, confused, and he was standing there, reaching out to me. For one heart-swooping moment, I thought he wanted to take my hand, and I was about to respond when he said, ‘That bow pasta. It’s called farfalle, I think.’ He took the packet and checked. ‘Yes. Look.’

Instead of looking, our eyes met and lingered, and I felt my insides begin to melt like an ice-cream cone on a sizzling July day.

‘I tend to buy those twists myself,’ Josh murmured, his amazing eyes still fixed on mine.

‘Twists?’

‘Fusilli, it’s called.’

‘Yes. Fusilli.’

‘Your eyes are incredible.’

I swallowed hard. ‘So are yours.’