Cowboys & Navy SEALs

Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

D on’t panic , Lemon’s mind screamed. This is only a dream. “Dreams can’t hurt me,” she murmured, sinking deeper into the pillow. An image of Jaxson flashed through her mind. She saw the tenderness in his eyes, the strength of his character. She was safe now. Safe to remember.

Lemon held her hand above her eyes, shielding them from the bright sunlight. A glint of metal caught her attention. She strained to make out the object. It looked to be a box, resting in the center of a field. A nondescript, gray metal box that should have held no significance. And yet, she couldn’t take her eyes off it. It called to her, beckoning to be opened. She took a tentative step. Brittle grass cracked beneath her feet. One step and then another, the sound keeping rhythm with her accelerating pace. She went over and picked it up, turning it over. It was a curious thing, more of a cube than a box. There seemed to be no lid. She examined it carefully, noticing a thin line an inch from the top, running along the entire box. Exerting all her strength, she pulled. Finally, the lid gave way, revealing the contents within …

Lemon ran a finger over the smooth mahogany wood of the dresser. It was modern, sleek with silver pulls. She took in the two plush striped chairs in muted wheat and gray-blue colors. Beneath the chairs was a fluffy, white shag rug. Airy linen drapes framed the large picture window. The view of the ocean was magnificent. For a moment, she let her mind get lost in the white-capped waves crashing into shore.

With a sigh, she turned. She needed to stop dilly-dallying and get ready. She frowned at the crimson gown draped over the bed. Tightening her towel around her body, she padded across the plush carpet of the enormous guest bedroom where she was spending the weekend. She stuck her head out the door and peered down the hall, looking for Jacklyn, the kind, quiet-spoken maid who’d made a point of staying near Lemon’s side ever since she’d stepped foot on the palatial estate. Where was the woman when she needed her?

With a heavy sigh, she stepped back into the room and closed the door. Lemon had been looking forward to this weekend for several weeks, but it wasn’t turning out like she’d hoped. The estate was incredible. Too bad she couldn’t say the same about her relationship. She’d always prided herself on being independent, but lately, she was feeling smothered. Her hand went to her hip as she studied the gown in disdain. A knock sounded at the door. “Who is it?” she called.

“It’s me, ma’am,” a timid voice replied.

She let out a breath. “Jacklyn, come in.”

The maid stepped in, a solicitous expression on her lined face. “I saw you stick your head out. Did you need something?”

“Yes, where’s my gold gown? Was there a mix-up at the dry-cleaner?” Frustration welled inside Lemon. Earlier today, she’d asked Jacklyn for an iron to press the wrinkles from her gown. Jacklyn insisted on sending it out to get dry cleaned. The banquet started in a little over an hour, and she had the wrong dress!

Jacklyn clasped her hands tightly as she wet her lips. “I picked up your gold gown from the dry-cleaner.”

“Okay, then where is it?”

She ducked her head slightly. “I’m sorry, ma’am. Mr. Livingston took your gown and told me to put this one out instead.”

A disbelieving cackle rose in Lemon’s throat. “He what?” Fire zigzagged through her brain as her voice went shrill. “This is ludicrous!”

An apologetic smile trembled over Jacklyn’s lips. “The gown is the same size as yours. I’m sure it’ll look beautiful on you.”

Lemon paced back and forth. “I can’t believe he would have the audacity to switch my gown!” They’d argued earlier because he wanted her to wear the red gown. She’d laughed lightly, insisting that she was a grown woman, perfectly capable of choosing her own clothes. It had seemed so trivial earlier, something she wouldn’t have thought about again … until now. She stopped in her tracks, glaring at Jacklyn. “I won’t wear it.” She lifted her chin.

Concern trickled over Jacklyn’s features as she glanced over her shoulder and then back at Lemon. “Please,” she urged in a low tone, “for your own sake, wear the dress.”

Alarm prickled over Lemon’s skin. “What do you mean?”

Jacklyn’s eyes darted around the room like she was afraid someone might be listening. “When this weekend is over, do yourself a favor and get as far away from this place and Mr. Livingston as you can.”

Lemon looked, then looked again. She’d thought Jacklyn was older, but in reality, she was young and beautiful. Her eyes were filled with a deep sadness that drilled into Lemon’s soul, making her want to weep.

The scene shifted and Lemon was standing at the bottom of the stairs. Her heart pounded like the march of doom as she grasped the handrail and began her ascent. Perspiration popped a string of pearls over her nose. Dread wrapped her like a shroud, but she kept going. She reached the door and cocked her ears. Was that sobbing she heard on the other side? Then came the crescendo of a panicked voice. “ You said you loved me. That we’d always be together. I trusted you!”

Lemon’s throat tightened. She swallowed, sucking in a fragment of air as she reached for the doorknob and turned it.

A scream pierced the air. Lemon recognized the voice as her own.

Terror seized her heart.

And then she was falling.

“Help her! Please!”

“Lemon, wake up.”

“Stop,” she sobbed. “Leave her alone. She’s my mother. I’m so sorry … I’m so sorry for what he did.”

Hands shook her arms.

With a gasp, Lemon shot up in bed. Panic gripped her lungs as she gulped for air.

“It’s okay,” a voice soothed. “You’re okay.”

Her brain shifted into focus as she realized what was happening. She’d had a nightmare. Her cheeks were wet with tears. Jaxson was sitting on the edge of the bed, trying to calm her down. She took in a breath as a hot embarrassment suffused her. “I’m sorry,” she lamented.

“No worries.” Pale moonlight bathed the room, coming in through the partially open blinds.

“Breathe,” Jaxson commanded. She did so, feeling like the situation was a repeat of earlier when Lucas had helped her calm down. She forced herself to breathe in through her nose slowly. She held her breath for a few counts before pushing it out through her mouth. She kept repeating the process, taking in a little more air each time. A few minutes later, she felt the blood returning to her face. It was then that she had enough clarity to pay closer attention to Jaxson. He seemed to be doing remarkably well, considering his fall. Doctor Jepson had called, helping to ease everyone’s fears. He said that Jaxson was the best judge of how he was feeling, and Jaxson agreed wholeheartedly, insisting that he was perfectly fine. To prove his point, he’d polished off three slices of pizza and drank every drop of his large smoothie.

“You’re gonna be just fine,” Jaxson assured her.

A small grin touched Lemon’s lips. Jaxson sounded boyishly cute, his voice coated with sleep. His hair was sticking up in all directions. Her breath froze when she realized that he was shirtless. Jeepers creepers, he was fit! His torso was so chiseled it might’ve belonged on a Greek statue. Her throat went dry as she swallowed.

Tenderly, he pushed a strand of hair away from her face. She realized that her hair was damp. She winced inwardly. He probably thought she was gross … all sweaty.

“You wanna tell me about it?”

“The nightmare?”

“Yeah.”

She let out a heavy sigh as she moistened her lips. “Sure. I’ll tell you as much as I can remember.” A shaky laugh left her throat. “Maybe you can help me make sense of it.”

He chuckled. “I’ve never claimed to be a dream analyzer, but I’ll do my best.”

Simply having his presence in the room helped to restore a sense of calm and normalcy. She scooted. “Care to join me? I promise I don’t bite,” she quipped.

“It’s not the biting that I’m worried about,” he countered, repeating the words she’d said to him.

She held up her hands. “No funny business. I promise.” Even though she was trying to be cute and funny, the truth was, she was unsettled and didn’t want to be alone right now.

He climbed in the bed, groaning slightly with the movement.

“Oh, my gosh! I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking. Your ribs and ankle.”

“I’m okay,” he said, his voice strained. “I just need to get somewhere and stay still.”

“Do you need me to prop up your ankle?”

“No, not right now.” He draped his arm around her shoulders, pulled her close, and relaxed against her. “Okay, tell me.”

The warmth of his skin seeped through her t-shirt, making her feel cozy and protected. Lightly, absently, he brushed his fingers against her arm. It tickled her skin, sending tingles of awareness over her. She chewed on her bottom lip, compiling her thoughts. “I was in the bedroom of an estate. Somewhere near the ocean. I was getting ready to attend a banquet. I had brought a gold gown to wear, but a man changed it to red.”

Jaxson tensed. “What man?”

She bunched her brows. “I’m not sure. I never saw the man’s face. A maid was there, helping me. She said the man’s last name.” She searched her memory. “I can’t remember,” she sighed in frustration.

“What else happened?”

“I was furious that the man had switched my dress. It seemed like it was a form of manipulation and control. The maid told me to wear the dress.” Echoes of her fear returned as she swallowed hard. “The maid told me to get away from the man and the estate. At first, I thought the maid was older, but then she transformed in front of my eyes, and I realized she was young and beautiful. And incredibly sad.” A shiver ran down her spine.

He rubbed her arm. “Are you okay? You’ve got goosebumps.”

“Yeah,” she sighed, “I’m okay.” Sinister shadows crowded around her, threatening to rip away her sanity. She sucked in a breath, willing herself to continue. “My dream changed, and I was walking up a long set of stairs. I heard a woman crying. I was terrified to open the door, but I forced myself to do so.” Her stomach twisted. “Then, I fell.” She was glad it was dark enough in the room so that Jaxson wouldn’t realize that she had tears in her eyes. “You came in and woke me up.” Her voice hitched. “I have no idea what any of it means. Was it just a dream … or my memories trying to surface?” She blew out a frustrated breath. “I have no idea.”

“Either way, you’re safe here with me,” he murmured into her hair.

She rested her head against the curve of his shoulder. She reached for his hand, lacing her fingers through his. “Thank you.”

He sounded surprised. “For what?”

A smile tipped her lips. “For being you. It can’t be easy for you to deal with my memory loss. And your ankle and bruised ribs. I’ve completely disrupted your life, and yet, you’ve been so patient and understanding.” She turned to look at him. “Have you always been so altruistic?”

“Not hardly.” A low chuckle rumbled in his throat. “I have ulterior motives.”

Her voice lilted. “Oh?”

“Yep, I have you back in my life.”

Her heart practically melted. “Tell me about us,” she implored. “We must’ve been so in love.”

“Not at first.”

“Really?”

“You couldn’t stand me, at first.” He laughed wistfully. “I’m afraid I was a bit of a terror in junior high, tormenting you relentlessly.”

She grinned. “Really? I wish I could remember.”

“No, you don’t,” he said quickly.

“Tell me something you did.”

His voice shot up an octave. “Why would I want to incriminate myself?”

She grinned at how his voice got higher pitched anytime he was excited or nervous. “Just one incident. Please.”

“Let’s see. Okay, you got these new designer jeans. You were flaunting them around.”

“I hardly think I was flaunting them,” she retorted.

“Hey, I’m the one telling this story.”

“Okay. Continue.”

“As I said, you were flaunting them around. A peacock couldn’t have been any prouder.”

She guffawed, nudging him slightly.

“Watch it,” he warned.

“Oops. Sorry,” she said contritely.

His voice grew recollective. She didn’t have to look at him to know that he was smiling. “You were about the cutest thing I’d ever seen in those tight jeans, showing off those long legs.”

She warmed at the compliment, nestling closer into his shoulder.

“Back then, you wouldn’t give me the time of day. I was gangly, awkward. You were gaga over Trevor Phillips. He was a senior and the starting quarterback at the time.”

“Ah, so it was all about the quarterbacks,” she mused playfully.

“I guess so,” he chuckled. “Anyhow, I got tired of watching you try to get Trevor’s attention in biology, so I grabbed a lighter from one of my buddies. I sat behind you and held the flame up to your back pocket.”

“What? That’s terrible! I’m sure I was livid.”

“Yes, ma’am. You didn’t realize what was happening at first. Then, you felt the heat. You jumped up out of that seat and nearly turned yourself inside out to see the back of your jeans. Afterwards, you called me every name in the book. Slapped me hard in the jaw. This got you a round of applause from the class, as well as a commendation from Mrs. Blevins, our teacher.”

She giggled. “You make me sound awful.”

“Nah, it was beautiful. I was hooked from that day on.”

“How long did we date?” She was eager to know everything about them.

“I asked you out a hundred times our sophomore year, but you turned me down.”

“I don’t believe that.”

“It’s true,” he asserted. “But I was persistent. I kept asking you out, until I finally wore you down. You said yes . We went to Six Flags together, right before the start of our junior year. The rest is history, as they say.”

A contented silence settled between them as Lemon ruminated over everything he’d said. In the semi-darkness, it was easier to be more open—say things they might not have said in the stark light of day. “Why did we break up?” Feeling him tense, she pushed out an irritated breath. “Look, I know you’re trying to protect me, which I appreciate, but the best thing you can do for me right now is to tell me the full, unvarnished truth.”

Surprise wrapped his voice. “You sure about that?”

“Yes.” No, she wasn’t sure of anything right now, but she was tired of running scared. She needed to face whatever monsters were under the bed. While she didn’t have the nerve to confront the biggest and scariest ones at the moment, she felt that she could handle hearing what had gone wrong between her and Jaxson.

“Okay. Everything fell apart the night of our senior graduation party.”

She wanted to pepper him with questions but sensed that she needed to remain quiet to give him space to get it all out.

“Things had been rocky. We argued a lot. You were ready to shake the dust off your heels and move to the big city.”

She made a face. “Which city?”

“You didn’t care. You wanted to do big things with your life. I wanted to stay around Franklin, or at least Tennessee. We got into a fight. Lucas was at the party. You asked if he’d take you home. He agreed.”

His voice was strained like he was building up to something. She braced herself for whatever it was.

He continued, “I went to your house to apologize …” His voice trailed off.

“It’s okay,” she said gently. “Whatever it is … I can handle it.”

He took in a breath. “Lucas’s truck was parked in your driveway. I was going to the front door, but then I heard voices, so I went around back. You and Lucas were sitting on the swing, locking lips.” He spoke in a monotone voice, as if the events had happened to someone else. “I went ballistic, accused you of being a two-timer. Then, I punched Lucas—broke his jaw. You and I never spoke again. We went our separate ways.”

Gloom settled over Lemon, her thoughts buzzing around her like frenzied bees. “I’m sorry,” she finally said, her voice sounding small in her own ears. She wanted to defend herself, to say that she’d never felt anything for Lucas, but how could she? She couldn’t even explain to Jaxson what she’d been thinking. Self-loathing crawled over her. “You must’ve hated me,” she said quietly.

“Hated you … loved you … missed you. All of the above.”

She took in a breath. “I’m so sorry,” she said again.

“It’s okay,” he replied genuinely. “It was a long time ago.”

Her heart hurt. “I cost us a lot of years,” she uttered. “Why didn’t I come back to you sooner?”

“We were kids. Both of us had a lot of growing up to do.”

Questions pressed around her like aggressive reporters, trying to get the full story. Where had she gone? What had she done with her life? Had there been other loves? Or had it always been Jaxson? She’d not felt the slightest inkling of attraction to Lucas. She couldn’t imagine a world where she’d find herself kissing Lucas, even if she was ticked at Jaxson. No wonder Jaxson had gotten so upset when he saw Lucas comforting her and thought they were together.

“Is that why you and Lucas hate each other? Because of me?”

He pushed out a long breath. “Lucas and I don’t hate each other. We just don’t always see eye to eye.”

“Could’ve fooled me,” she fired back.

“The two of us have always been rivals, practically since birth.” He paused.

“And?” she prompted.

“Things got much worse in high school, when we both fell for the same girl.”

Lemon’s stomach lurched. “You mean me?”

“Yep,” he clipped. “Lucas was madly in love with you.”

She gritted her teeth. “For the record, I have zero feelings for Lucas.”

He grunted out a chuckle. “That’s good to know.”

“I wish I could tell you why I did what I did back then, but I can’t.” She hesitated. “All I can tell you is that I’m not that same person.” A hot blanket of shame covered her. “I truly am sorry for all of the pain I’ve caused you.”

“It wasn’t all your fault. I should’ve been more understanding of your need to go out and conquer the world.”

Tears brimmed in her eyes. “Did I?” she squeaked, “conquer the world?”

“Yes,” he said ardently, squeezing her shoulders. “You did that and more! I’ve never been prouder.”

A sob rose in her throat. She choked it back down with a hard swallow. “I don’t feel like a success.” Tears spilled down her cheeks. “I feel like such a failure.”

“We often fail to see our own greatness,” Jaxson said practically.

“Thank you for not giving up on me,” she sniffed. “It seems so crazy that I wanted to go away to the city. The mere thought of living in such a big place turns my insides green.”

He chuckled in surprise. “Maybe you got everything you wanted and realized it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.”

“Yeah, maybe.” Her brain jumped forward. “When we were at the hospital, you said my mother’s in a care center in LA.”

“Yes.”

“I’d like to go and visit her.”

“Okay,” he said warily.

“Would you go with me? We can wait until you get better. Maybe seeing my mom will help trigger my memory.” She frowned. “We’ll have to figure out which care center she’s in.”

“You’ll be happy to know that my daddy’s having someone look into it.”

Her eyes widened. “Really? That’s kind of him.”

“He just wants to help you through the process.”

“Your parents are awesome,” she said with a tinge of awe.

“I think so.” There was a smile in his voice.

“It must be nice to have parents who are still so much in love, even after being together for so many years.” Watching them tonight—their lingering gazes, how Birdie would touch Knox’s hand when she spoke—had evoked a longing inside Lemon, making her realize that she wanted what they had, with Jaxson. Crazy that some core part of herself knew her inner desires, even though she couldn’t remember anything.

“My parents aren’t together.”

For a second she wondered if she’d heard him correctly. “Huh?”

“Nope,” he said regretfully. “They’re divorced. Have been since I was a teenager.”

“But they’re so close. Anyone looking at them can see that.”

“Yeah, it’s a strange situation, for sure. I’m grateful that they’re now close friends.”

She tried to wrap her mind around what he was saying. “What happened? If you don’t mind my asking,” she quickly added. It seemed to take forever for him to answer.

“My daddy had an affair.”

The air left her lungs. “No!” she exclaimed in dismay. “I can’t believe that,” she finished quietly. Despondency settled over her. It was silly, feeling that her and Jaxson’s future somehow hinged on what had occurred between Knox and Birdie. Maybe she was just searching for something solid and substantial to hold onto.

Jaxson must’ve sensed her gloominess because he angled to face her. He stroked her cheek with his thumb, giving her an encouraging smile. “Lemonade, you and I are gonna be just fine.”

More tears wet her eyes as she hiccuped a laugh. “You think so?”

“I know so,” he said with such certainty that it immediately soothed her fears.

He sighed. “I guess I should head to my own bed, so you can get some rest.” A low chuckle sounded in his throat. “I did promise my mama that I’d be a perfect gentleman.”

She giggled. “I’ll vouch for you.”

When he moved to leave, she placed the flat of her hand on his chest. “Stay, please … just until I fall asleep.”

“You got it,” he murmured.

They lay back against the pillows. Lemon scooted close. The steady beating of his heart was more calming than a lullaby. Her eyelids grew heavy. Just before sleep overtook her, a slice of memory slipped through. “Livingston,” she said groggily. “That’s the name of the man who took my gown.”