Cowboys & Navy SEALs

Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Gracie wandered aimlessly through the Ft. Worth Botanical Gardens for several hours and had just taken a seat on a bench when Gertrude caught up to her. She motioned to the empty space beside Gracie. “May I?”

“Suit yourself.” A light breeze was blowing, raising goosebumps over Gracie’s flesh. She folded her arms tightly across her chest and turned her attention to the picturesque scene in the distance that was a stark contrast to the conflicting emotions rumbling in her gut. A wooden garden bridge, curving sharply across the placid creek, reminded Gracie of the top section of a waterwheel that had been cut out and artfully placed to serve as a focal point in the otherwise natural landscape. Sculpted bushes of varying heights framed the bridge, and lush trees provided the perfect backdrop. The scene was exquisite, even in early March when things weren’t in bloom. She could only imagine how magnificent the scene would be next month, when spring arrived.

“The Japanese Gardens are my favorite too,” Gertrude said, speaking in low tones, so as not to disturb the serenity. “I’m always amazed at how perfect everything looks. It takes an expert horticulturist to create such perfection in an ever- changing environment. It must require daily maintenance to keep everything trimmed so precisely.”

Gracie acknowledged the comment with a curt nod. Leave it to Gertrude to get all scientific. Why couldn’t she simply enjoy the beauty without analyzing it to death?

A heavy silence settled between them until Gertrude spoke. “We need to talk about what happened at the gym.”

She blew out a breath.

“Gracie.”

That’s all it took for everything to come tumbling out. She gave Gertrude an accusing look. “Why? So you can reprimand me some more? Tell me what I fool I am for having feelings for Sheldon?”

Gertrude let out a weary sigh. “That’s exactly what I would do … if I thought it would do any good.”

She thrust out her lower lip. “He’s not the devil you think he is.”

“And he’s not the angel you think he is.” She rubbed a hand over her brow. “Look, I’ve tried every way I can think of to warn you about him. Despite what you think, he doesn’t have your best interest at heart.”

Frustration splattered over Gracie. “Why do you always see the worst in everyone and everything?”

Surprise tinged Gertrude’s features. “Sheldon is on the road to becoming a dark angel. I don’t have to look very hard in order to see the bad.” She peered over her glasses, making Gracie feel like an errant child. “Frankly, I’m surprised you can’t see this for what it is.”

Unable to withstand Gertrude’s piercing gaze, Gracie turned and stared once more at the garden bridge in the distance. She felt like she was treading in deep water, and Gertrude’s words were a massive waterfall, pounding on her head and threatening to push her under. “Oh, yeah? And what exactly is it that you see?”

“Let’s look at this logically. At the very least, he’s trying to distract you from accomplishing your mission.” A shadow fell over her face as she shuddered. “At the very worst, he’s trying to turn you.”

Dismay throbbed through Gracie. In those suffocating moments when her fears had risen up and become menacing monsters, she’d feared the same thing. But putting a voice to it made it all the more terrible. “Into a dark angel?” she croaked.

Gertrude nodded, her eyes filling with concern.

She let out a shaky laugh. “No, you’re wrong. He wouldn’t do that.” She quickly swept the fear aside before it could overtake her. “That’s ridiculous!”

“Is it?”

“Yes! There’s good in him. I’ve felt it.”

Gertrude was unconvinced. “Have you really felt it? Or is it what you want to feel?”

Gracie’s heart began hammering in her chest as a cold sweat broke over her. She hated the rational way that Gertrude was laying everything out. Had she been furious or hotheaded, her argument would’ve been easier to discount, but her icy logic was stopping her cold. “I don’t know,” she admitted, tears filling her eyes. She looked at Gertrude. “What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to say that you’ll exercise caution when you’re around him. Maybe ask yourself why he’s singled you out.”

The comment struck a nerve. “Is it so hard for you to believe that he might like me … find me attractive?”

She paused, stroking her chin. “You’re as attractive as the next girl, I suppose.”

Had she really just said that? “Geez! You sure know how to make a girl feel good,” Gracie said sourly.

“I’m not trying to insult you. I’ve known Sheldon for a long time, and beautiful women are his stock and trade.”

She gasped like she’d been punched in the gut. Sheldon with other women … beautiful women? Not the picture she wanted in her head!

“Oh, don’t get your feathers ruffled,” Gertrude huffed, “all I’m saying is that I’ve never seen Sheldon settle on one girl for this length of time. You mark my word, there’s more to this than simple attraction. I just can’t put my finger on what it is.”

A thundercloud of irritation rained down on Gracie. Regardless of what Gertrude said, her female intuition told her that Sheldon cared about her. She could feel it in his touch … the way he looked at her. She was sure of it! Gertrude didn’t know everything.

“Just promise me that you’ll be cautious around him. No more of this silly schoolgirl romance nonsense. You’re an angel-in-training, and you need to act accordingly.”

Trying to follow Gertrude’s train of thought was like riding a seesaw. One minute, she was plunging to the ground and the next, flying towards the sky. Hope sprang in her breast. “You’re not forbidding me from ever seeing him again?”

“Heavens no! If I forced you to stay away from him, how could you ever become a real angel? You must learn to choose the good on your own accord. I can’t protect you from everything. And it’s obvious that Sheldon has no intention of staying away from you.” She shook her head sadly. “For better or worse, you’ll have to see this through.”

Gracie squared her jaw. “Okay, I can do that.” She relaxed in her seat. “I’ll be careful. You have my word.”

Gertrude looked her in the eye. “For your sake, I sincerely hope that’s the case.”

It was a huge relief to have that conversation out of the way, and it had gone much better than she’d dared to hope. She could see Sheldon again … and she wouldn’t have to feel guilty about it. Hallelujah! Her mind jumped forward to another topic. She cast a surreptitious glance at Gertrude, who’d turned her attention to the garden bridge. Now was as good a time as any to voice the concern that had been eating away at her for some time now. “Do you ever think about what your life would’ve been like if you hadn’t died?”

“What?”

She shifted in her seat. “I guess your situation is a little different because you’re older, but I died so young. I know I was shortsighted and selfish, not to mention that I was so caught up in acting, I couldn’t see anything else. But, deep down, I always assumed I’d get married one day and have a family … and now I never will.” She swallowed the cold lump in her throat.

Understanding touched Gertrude’s features. “Is that why you’re so fixated on Sheldon?”

Heat blistered Gracie’s cheeks. “I’m not fixated on him.” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and clasped her hands together tightly.

“Sure you’re not,” Gertrude said dryly.

Gracie rolled her eyes.

“It’s perfectly normal to have regrets about your life.”

She grunted. “Some of us obviously have more regrets than others.”

“You think I don’t have regrets?”

She made a face. “What? Miss Perfect who always follows the rules to a T? What regrets could you possibly have? Did you let a kid get away without paying the proper fine for an overdue book?” It was a nasty thing to say, and she felt a twinge of guilt when she saw Gertrude’s face shrivel and draw into itself like a turtle going into a shell. “I’m sorry,” she amended. “Don’t mind me. I’m just ticked right now.”

“Despite what you think, I’m not perfect,” she countered testily. “I made my share of mistakes. And I have my share of regrets.”

This piqued Gracie’s interest. “Such as?”

“I really don’t see how any of this is relevant to the situation.”

“Oh, no, don’t keep me at a distance. Tell me a regret that you have. I thought the purpose of you being my mentor was so that we could learn to trust each other. How in the heck am I supposed to trust you if you never share anything?”

Gertrude looked thoughtful. “I suppose that’s fair.” Her eyes took on a faraway look as she adjusted her suit. “I wasn’t always this old and severe.” She chuckled wistfully. “In fact, I wasn’t half bad looking.” She gave Gracie a sly look. “At least as attractive as the next girl.”

Gracie let out a half laugh. “Gertie, I do believe you have a smidgen of a sense of humor in you,” she joked.

Gertrude ignored the jab and went back to her narrative. “I was working on my graduate studies when we met. He was smitten with me from the very beginning. It took me a little longer to come around, but when I did …” Her face went pink, and she pushed back her hair in a self-conscious gesture. “Anyway, we had a whirlwind romance …” she cut her eyes at Gracie “ … that would’ve impressed even you.”

It was hard to imagine that Gertrude would have had any kind of romance, much less a whirlwind romance, but she certainly wasn’t going to say as much. She was trying to break herself of blurting out the first thing that came to her mind. When Gertrude paused a little too long, Gracie scooted in closer. “What happened next?”

“He wanted to get married, but I wasn’t ready. I was too caught up in my studies. We decided to postpone things. He took a job out of state. For about a year, we tried to maintain a long distance relationship, but we eventually drifted apart.” A pained expression overcame her face.

Gracie put a hand on her arm. “What happened?” she said gently.

She smiled regretfully. “By the time I realized what I had lost, he was engaged to someone else.”

The futility of it all got under Gracie’s skin. She made a face. “Why didn’t you go after him … tell him how you felt?”

She shrugged, and Gracie was struck by how bony her shoulders were. For the first time, Gertrude looked vulnerable. “I did go after him,” Gertrude continued. “But …” she cleared a frog from her throat “… but it was too late. He’d fallen in love with the other girl, and he didn’t want me anymore.”

Tears pressed against Gracie’s eyes. “I’m so sorry.” Gertrude was much more complex than she realized. “What happened to the guy?”

Gertrude pressed her lips together into a grim line. “He married and had a family.”

“And you?”

She sat up straight in her seat, her voice growing practical. “I did the only thing I knew how to do. I locked my heart and poured myself into my work.”

“Is that why you became a relationship angel?”

She shrugged. “I suppose that’s one of the reasons.” Her voice was distant, and she was staring into space.

“Has it helped?”

She shook her head, as if coming out of a fog. “What?”

“Has it helped?”

“I don’t understand what you mean.”

“Well, I’m wondering if helping other people find love has helped to ease your pain.”

She smiled. “I suppose it does help … a little. It feels good to help others. Makes me think less of myself and my own regrets.”

Gracie knew this was a dig towards her, but this time, she didn’t mind. She felt a surprising kinship with Gertrude and had to fight the urge to fling her arms around her and give her a tight hug. “Thanks for telling me.”

Gertrude nodded. And then, as was so characteristic of her, she instantly switched gears. “About Brooke.”

“Please tell me that you’re going to give me another assignment. Even you must realize how impossible this is. With Sheldon on the scene, I don’t stand a chance of finding someone for her.”

“Oh, no! We never give up.” The matter-of-fact tone of her voice left no room for argument.

“Really?” She wanted to scream! Or get down on her hands and knees and pound the ground! Was giving up really so bad?

“Brooke needs you.”

She let out a cynical laugh. “I seriously doubt that.”

“You’ll see,” Gertrude said, giving her a cryptic smile. She pressed down the loose strands of hair that had gotten caught by the wind. “Anyway, I’m going to help you. Stewart, Brooke’s dad, just lost his assistant, who took another job. He’s interviewing for her replacement.” She made a point of looking Gracie up and down. “With a few tweaks, I think you’ll be perfect for the job.” She peered over her glasses. “How’s your typing?”