Crave (Beneath The Secrets #3)

63. Alexei

CHAPTER 63

ALEXEI

I’m pacing around the bedroom like a caged bear.

I don’t want to leave her. I don’t even want to utter the words. But Tatiana's threats are loud in my head.

If I don’t do this, Lara isn’t safe. In reality, this is the worst of the evils I am protecting her from.

A billow of steam comes from the ensuite as Lara dries her hair. She stops when she spots me.

“What’s up? I could hear you stomping around even with the water going.”

She tosses the towel in the laundry basket and tightens the one around her breasts.

“Words, Alexei. I’m a grown woman, I can handle it.” She frowns and looks at me.

“Unless you’ve cheated. Then we have a serious problem and Mikhail will have to hide your body.”

I shake my head.

Is this worse? No. I don’t think so.

“God, no. Can you umm, sit down?”

“You’re worrying me. Spill.”

Oh no. Her hand is on her hip. She’s getting mad.

“I have to go away for a little while. I promise, once I’m home, we tell the truth and we have our forever. Together.”

She sighs, sitting on the bed, I take a spot next to her, placing my hand on her knee.

“Tell me you’re not going to Russia.”

She won’t look at me.

“I vowed to keep you safe, pchelka. That never stops, I can’t stop until the ones who took you are buried. The threat against you has to die. No matter what it takes. This is the only way.”

“You aren’t going on your own.”

“Mikhail will come with me. Now in the meantime, I need you to stay with Niki. Take Sheila and Bruce.”

I don’t need to add more worry by telling her that Mikhail is simply dropping me off.

“How long?”

I shrug my shoulders. “I don’t have the answer to that.”

I hear her sniffle and wrap my arm around her, tugging her into my side.

“I need you, sweets. I don’t want to be without you.”

Fuck.

Turning to face her, I kneel on the bed and take her face in my hands.

“There isn’t anything you can’t do. You never needed me, not really. You need to let me go, and I need you to be fierce. Be the girl that stole my heart all those years ago, pchelka.”

I see fear in her eyes, I can feel it.

“We will find our way back to each other, I promise. I simply cannot exist without you.”

Resting my forehead against hers, I inhale her scent, like coconuts from her shampoo.

“Our love isn’t just inevitable, it’s destined. I’m going to need to you fight for us, pchelka. More than anything, look after yourself, fight those demons until I’m back to help you. I need you to be okay while I’m away. Please try for me, baby.”

I kiss her and then wrap my arms around her holding her as close as I possibly can.

“I will try my best, Alexei. Don’t worry, just come home to me.”

I always will, it’s my purpose.

“When do you leave?”

“Tomorrow.” I hold my breath, waiting to see her reaction.

Her jaw tightens. “I can do this. I’ll be strong for us.”

“I love you, Lara.”

“I love you, all of it.”

I kiss her, like it’s possibly the last time. I will fight my damn hardest to make it back to her so we can finally live our lives how we were meant to, together.

“I’d never spend a single second away from you if I had a choice. I’d glue you to me if it was safe to do.”

We snuggle up under the covers and she settles in my arms.

I hold her tight. I don’t want to ever let her go.

I’m going to be empty without her by my side.

There is no me without her.

And feeling her body shudder from her silent cries is enough fuel for me to make sure I kill whichever motherfucker I’m sent there for.