Crew (Hockey Royalty #3)

25. Liv

Chapter 25

Liv

“T exting lover boy, again?” Tenley groans and hip checks me as she walks by carrying a fern that wasn’t in our apartment yesterday.

“Yeah. He’s taking his pre-game nap soon and I wanted to say sweet dreams,” I confess but I leave out the part where I just went into the bathroom and also sent him a cleavage-filled selfie in case he can't sleep and needs something to entertain himself with.

Tenley smiles. “I did not see this plot twist with you and the cool Westwood coming.”

“Neither did I but I’m so happy Ten.” I grin at her. “I feel like I can tell him anything. And that he tells me anything. Maybe because we started so… candidly. I don’t know but it’s real. And it’s good.”

“Did he ever tell you why he and Nash-hole looked like they’d lost a Fight Club match with The Rock at their dad’s jersey ceremony?” Tenley wants to know.

“Okay so maybe he doesn’t tell me everything.” I laugh as I tuck my phone in my back pocket and move to the wall she hung the backdrop on. It’s a little crooked so I tweak it. “He said he’ll explain everything when he gets back.”

“When is that?”

“Friday afternoon. They play Seattle tonight and Vancouver Thursday.” I stand back and look at the gray backdrop Tenley borrowed from the UCLA film department. It looks good.

“Look at you with the schedule memorized.” I am amusing Tenley way too much. “I love this journey for you.”

“Shut up or I’ll walk and you’ll have to find another unpaid production assistant,” I warn but she knows my threats are empty. I need to help her with the additional footage for her documentary proposal because tomorrow I have to go to court and give my side of the incident and face the guy who did this. I have no classes today no internship and no Dylan so if I don't help Tenley, I’d do nothing but stress out.

“My therapist said I should tell Mom and Dad before the trial,” I announce, and Tenley stops moving. Her head spins to face me. “So I emailed them.”

“Liv!”

“I’m better with things written down,” I argue. “And that way Mom couldn’t interrupt and freak the hell out. It was the best option. I also begged them not to jump on a plane and promised I would call as soon as it’s all over tomorrow.”

“Your mother will not respect that wish.”

“I know. But I also googled the flights and there isn’t really an easy way for her to get here in time,” I reply, and Tenley looks shocked.

“I’m almost proud of that sneaky move. And I am very proud you’re finally seeing someone about this.”

“Crew gave me the name of a very good psychologist,” I admit. “We do Zoom meetings. It’s helpful. I am also going to go to that group at school this week. Not because I’m a victim but because I’m a survivor.”

She smiles brightly at me and her face is filled with relief. There's a knock at the door. "Okay, that's the film crew. The girlfriend should be next."

Tenley rushes to the door and I walk over and get the bar stool we’re going to have this hockey girlfriend sit on. Tenley’s meeting with the Amazon guy went well, but he had two things he was requesting Tenley tweak before he brings the series trailer to his boss. He wanted more young, current wives or girlfriends and a broader representation of more teams.

When Tenley mentioned this in front of Mallory, she suggested that Tenley interview her brother Emmett's new girlfriend. Emmett Echolls had recently been traded to the Quebec Nationals. But he'd started seeing a girl from California at the beginning of the summer and they'd agreed to try long-distance. Mallory wasn't all that close to her siblings, so she didn't know much about the woman, but she got her contact information for Tenley and the woman agreed to an interview. Tenley could splice that into the trailer and hopefully, it would appease the Amazon guy.

The interview was last minute so she decided to use our apartment for it. So now a camera guy, a sound girl, and a make-up artist are cramming themselves and their equipment into our space. I stand back and let them do their thing and admire Tenley who is flawlessly running the show. She’s so confident and calm. I hope I look like that when I’m teaching class.

My phone buzzes and it’s a text from Crew.

Crew: Miss you.

Before I can write back I get a picture from him. The outline of his very hard cock through a very thin sheet on his hotel bed.

Crew: He misses you too.

Oh my God, I leave the room to go splash water on my very red, very hot face. Then text him back.

Liv: I miss you both.

I fan my face again and head back out. Our guest has arrived—and she is stunning. Long dark wavy hair, big thick lashed brown eyes, olive skin. She’s wearing an outfit I could never dream of pulling off, a silky slip dress with a business-like blazer on top. The sound girl is struggling to find a place to clip the mic.

“So I’ll ask you some really simple, day in the life, what’s it like questions,” Tenley is explaining. “And you just give me candid, honest answers. Keep your eyes on me, or my assistant, not the camera.”

Tenley motions toward me and the pretty woman’s eyes find mine. “Hi!”

“Hi!” She sounded bright and cheerful. I sound squeaky and hyper. Great.

She turns her attention back to Tenley. “This is going to be so much fun. Honey, I am just the glitter you need to make this thing shine.”

“That’s what we’re banking on,” Tenley says, and I don't know how she keeps a professional demeanor. I would want to either laugh or roll my eyes at that comment. "The long-distance aspect of you and Emmett's relationships is definitely different."

“So if your docu-thingy gets bought by someone will I be a featured cast member? Like a regular?” she asks.

The makeup artist stands back, done. Yeah, she somehow managed to make the pretty woman prettier. The sound girl gets the mic to clip to her lapel finally and she gets out of the way. Tenley starts giving her directions on where to sit, and how to angle herself. "So the casting thing? You didn't answer."

“Well, you’d likely be asked to be in a few episodes, yeah. But we don’t call it cast members as it isn’t scripted,” Tenley corrects. “Okay. We ready Anne-Marie?”

Wait… what? She has the same name as Crew’s ex. I study her, really study her, from across the room. I have, like any bed buddy who hoped to be more, googled Crew and saw pictures of his ex online with him from when they were married and she would attend games. She had darker hair and maybe a bit of a rounder face and… thinner lips but… well no. It couldn’t be.

I subtly slip my phone out of my pocket and pull up my Google search but I don’t get to punch her name in because Tenley calls my name and asks me to bring her clipboard. I rush over carrying the notes she left on the dining room table and she settles into one of the other bar stools and the next thing we know we’re filming.

Everything seems fine. Anne-Marie talks at length about Emmett and dating a hockey player and having a long-distance relationship and all is smooth sailing and I remind myself that there were four other Olivias in my fourth-grade class. There are two in my program at UCLA. There could easily be more than one Anne-Marie involved with a hockey player. And I've almost convinced myself when Tenley asks her why add the stress of long-distance to a relationship that's already difficult due to the travel and schedule of a pro hockey player.

“Because honestly, it’s not my first rodeo. I was married to a hockey player previously, so I know that the distance, being apart from them, isn’t the hard part.”

Tenley’s head snaps up from her notes. Her blonde brows are furrowed. “I’m sorry, you were married to a different hockey player?”

"Yeah. Emmett knows so I didn't think it was a secret. Did you not know?" Anne-Marie smiles and leans forward a little bit, lowering her voice. "I thought maybe that was the reason you guys wanted me. Because I've got double the perspective. I had the worst marriage possible to a player and now I'm in a healthy, albeit long-distance, relationship with a man who knows loyalty and how to be faithful to their partner."

“Who were you married to?” The cameras are rolling. I’m not supposed to be the one talking. And I am certainly not supposed to be the one asking unscripted questions. But Tenley doesn't yell cut or chastise me. She's staring intently at Anne-Marie waiting for the answer I'm scared I already know.

She flips her brown hair over her shoulder, creating a rustle in the mic but I don’t need the mic. I hear her loud and clear when she says, “Crew Westwood.”

“Cut!” Tenley bellows and jumps off her stool. She hands me the clipboard she’s holding and our eyes meet. She looks absolutely blindsided so I know she was as clueless as I am. She waves the sound woman over. “You can unmic her. This isn’t going to work out. Thank you for coming Anne-Marie. I didn’t mean to waste your time but this isn’t going to work out for us.”

“Why? What happened?” The sound woman plucks the mic from her jacket, and Anne-Marie stands up. “I’m not saying anything untrue. We were married. He had sex with other people. It’s over. All true.”

"I do not have permission to discuss anything related to your former marriage," Tenley says like she's suddenly a world-class lawyer. "Mr. Westwood has not signed on and I can't allow his name disparaged without his ability to defend it. Sorry."

The tone of that sorry says she is not sorry at all. Anne-Marie hears it too, but she doesn’t appreciate it the way I do. Her voice gets tight, her hands slip to her hips, and she gets a defiant glint in her eye. “But his dad is doing this, right? I heard from Emmett that Avery Westwood was in this. My ex-father-in-law. He knows. He knows all about it. The cheating… the three ways he wanted to have with me. And the men.”

“What?” The word hurls itself out of my mouth.

She nods, thinking she’s hooked us. I’m not a fish taking her bait. I’m a girlfriend getting her feelings bulldozed. What the hell is even happening here? Anne-Marie leans in. “So I can’t say this on camera, but we’re not rolling so, yeah. We had an open marriage and it all went south when our three ways became M-F-M. Crew is gay."

“He is not,” I say with all the firm belief I have in my heart.

Anne-Marie stares at me. “How would you know?”

"Thank you for your time. Sorry, you aren't a fit. Have a great day," Tenley announces as she swings open the front door to our apartment.

Anne-Marie stares at her completely confused and visibly annoyed. But then she snatches her bag from the table next to the fern and walks out without another word. Tenley shuts the door behind her with a firm thud and then turns to her crew. "Sorry, all. I promise I'll pay you for the full three hours I booked but you're all free to go. And please, I beg you all to remember you signed confidentiality agreements. Absolutely nothing heard at these interviews can be shared with anyone."

The group is quiet as they gather their things as quickly as possible and disappear out the door. It’s only once we’re alone that Tenley looks me in the eye. “I don’t believe her,” Tenley tells me and leans against our closed front door, pushing the heels of her hands into her eyes. “I know that intimate relationships are a new area for you, Livvy but trust me when I say that it’s rare one person is entirely at fault for a failed relationship. She came here with an agenda. She wanted to slander her ex. She’s bitter and petty and we both know Crew isn’t gay.”

"No, he isn't," I agree and then bite my lip. "I know he's not. I do. But I need to know if anything she said was true. Does that make me a bad person? A jealous girlfriend?"

Tenley smiles and shakes her head. "No, it makes you a caring one. One that is worried she's setting herself up for a fall. It's okay to be cautious and anxious. Talk to him. I'm sure you'll work this all out."

I nod and try to flash her a confident smile but I’m sure my lip is quivering. I am the opposite of confident. After we clean the apartment and set it back to normal, Tenley offers to stay with me while I call Crew, but I tell her I want privacy so she locks herself in her room to find a new person to add to the documentary.

I walk into my room, close the door, take a deep breath, and FaceTime Crew. He picks up right away. "Hey, Fireball. I was just dreaming of you."

His head is on his pillow. His dirty blond hair tousled. There’s a pillow crease on his cheek. The bruising is already fading to a yellowish color on his face. He looks so handsome and he’s all mine. I hope this conversation doesn’t change that.

“Are you stressing out about the trial tomorrow?”

“I’ve been anxious,” I start and he rubs the sleep from his eyes and focuses on me intently as he sits up.

“I wish I could be there.”

“It’s okay I told you I can handle this alone,” I remind him and take a deep breath. I just have to tell him. “But I decided to help Tenley with some extra interviews for the documentary pitch to keep my mind off of it and… Mallory’s brother’s new girlfriend was our subject.”

“Which brother? Doesn’t she have a couple?”

“Emmett. The only one who plays hockey.”

Crew nods and rolls his eyes. “Right. The douche who sold out Tate to TMZ.”

"He didn't. They thought it was him but it was the other brother," I explain and then shake my head. Stay focused. Clearly, he doesn't know his ex is dating Emmett. "Anyway his new girlfriend… we had no idea but… it's your ex."

He blinks. Furrows his brow. Sits up straighter. “Anne… Anne-Marie is dating Emmett Echolls?”

I nod. Crew says nothing, staring off into space, probably absorbing that information. When he finally looks at me I don’t see any jealousy or anger. He looks a little pained, I think, but I get that. A marriage ended. I’ve looked pained after ending relationships half that committed. “She’s gonna ruin his life if he’s not careful. Lord knows she tried to ruin mine.”

“She may still be trying,” I say and his head snaps to attention, his eyes widening.

“What?”

Oh god, I don't know how to have this conversation? I close my eyes. "She said all this stuff about your marriage and you."

“On camera? In front of how many people?”

He’s gotten off the bed now, the luxury hotel room is a blur behind him he’s moving so quickly. It hits me hard that he hasn’t asked what she said. “Yeah. I mean no. Not on film. Not all of it. Tenley called cut as soon as your name came up.”

“But she kept talking? Who was in the room? You and Tenley? Was there anyone else?” Crew wants to know. I’m looking at the ceiling of the room now because he must have put down the phone.

“Yeah a couple crew members but Tenley said they all signed NDAs which means?—”

“They legally can’t talk about anything they hear. Good, I guess, but they still heard her.”

“Don’t you…” I swallow. My mouth is dry. “Don’t you want to know what she said about you?”

The phone moves and then I see his face again. Only I don't recognize it. His jaw is tight, his eyes narrowed and cold, his mouth in a flat, hard line. He looks so mean. "That I cheated. That I forced her into three ways. It's all the same crap she threatened to go to the media with if I didn't pay her more than the prenup had indicated."

“Oh.” I want to feel better at this revelation. “So this is her slandering you for money?”

“She got the money. Now she’s just slandering me for sport, I guess. But jokes on her. I'll get my dad's lawyer involved again. He won't let her continue to do this," he says firmly, and then he swallows and scrubs his face with his hand, rubbing off the hard, cruel face I didn't recognize. When he looks at me again, I see a glimmer of the Crew I know. The one I've been falling in love with for the past few months.

"So is it all lies? Or is it true but not the way she says it happened?" I bite my lip.

“You know I married young. I told you how hard I worked to stay married even though I knew deep down it was doomed. She asked me to buy her a big stupid house and I did it. She asked me to experiment, sexually, and I did that too.”

“So… you guys cheated on each other? Because she wanted you to cheat?” The Crew I know is monogamous and happy about it. I think.

“It wasn’t cheating. We opened our marriage,” Crew explained. “With ground rules. And she broke those ground rules, not me.”

"And there were… three ways?"

He swears, the hardness coming back to his features and his voice. "Is that the part you think is horrible? Or is it the part where she says I had three ways involving men?"

"No. I don't think that's horrible. I think it's horrible she's calling you something you aren't," I don't think I'm handling this right but I don't know what right is here. All I can do is handle it the best I can and I'm trying. "Because she said you were gay and that isn't true because you have feelings for me."

He calms a minute, all the pressure I could see building in his chest, tightening his muscles, making the vein on the side of his thick neck throb, it all slows. “That’s right. I do.”

I slowly exhale. “I care about you too Crew. More and more each day.”

“I’m not gay.”

"Please know if you were I would want you to be. I'd want you to be whoever you truly are and I would be devastated because I'm falling in love with you at a blindingly fast pace, but I wouldn’t be devastated that you were gay because there is nothing wrong with being gay. I’d just mourn not being what you’re attracted to." I am babbling but I think I make sense. Please may I be making sense?

“I think I’ve made it abundantly clear that you are exactly what I’m attracted to,” Crew replies. “I’ve even provided photographic evidence today.”

I smile softly. He smiles too but it's not the kind he usually gives me. He's not lighting up any rooms today. "But… I have been meaning to tell you that… in the past, I've been with men. And I've liked it. Because I'm bisexual."

I blink. He’s staring at me with such a soft, open, vulnerable look. My head is spinning, my heart is aching. “But now you’re with me. And only me.”

“Yes. And I only want to be with you.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yeah. I’ve always believed sexuality is a spectrum,” I explain but something about this is sitting wrong. Not exactly wrong but… something is still causing an ache in my chest. “I don’t care that you’re bi, Crew. I care that you didn’t tell me until you were forced to.”

He doesn't say anything. In fact, he doesn't even look at me through the screen. I have a sudden urge to apologize, say forget it, and just brush this whole thing under the proverbial bed because I'm a people pleaser. And I don't want to lose him. But I'm trying to be stronger, like my mom, and she is the queen of speaking her mind and standing up for her feelings so I will too. "I told you everything about my biggest worries and my secrets. The attack. I didn’t want to but I did and I thought we were both sharing. That’s a big part of who you are and you kept it from me.”

“Because, I told you, I don’t trust women.”

“I’m not women,” I argue. “I’m your woman. I’ve never given you any reason to think I would do anything other than have your back. But you keep lumping me in with someone who wronged you. I can’t fix that, Crew. So I think you need to decide whether or not you can really, truly let me in the way I’ve let you in. Because if you can’t… I have to walk away.”

“What?”

He sounds angry and shocked. I feel sad and tired and terrified he’s going to let me go. But I have to stick to this. I know I do. “So think about it. I’ll see you when you get back.”

He hangs up before I can and that feels like a very, very bad sign.