Darkness

30. Cain

Thirty

Cain

“What took you so long?” I ask Tess as she walks over to me, and sits on the wall.

“I was hoping you would go back.” She looks behind her, and down the black hole. “You want to die, and The Pit is where you come?” She turns to face me, but she looks sad, hurt. “Cain, what are you doing here? Why aren’t you fighting?”

Is she crazy, why would I fight? I can be with her now.

“This was home for so many years, and I knew you’d find me here.”

“Cain-”

“Tess, we can be together.” I take her hand in mine, planting a small kiss on there.

“And what about her?” Tess points to the ground, and I see Autumn sitting on the bed next to me, talking about the flower shop. “She loves you-”

“You love me?” I ask, not able to take my eyes away from Autumn sipping on her tea.

“I will always love you, but-”

“Don’t say but.” I don’t know what she’s thinking, but we can be together and she’s pushing me away.

“You can’t leave her, she’ll be in danger.” Tess turns to face me, and leans in closer. “Cain, you were my first love, the man I wanted everything with. I knew the boy who fought to live, I loved the man it made you. But Autumn-Rose, she loves you with all the darkness, and the demons who carry with you. She loves you for who you are, including all the scars, your past, and even the danger she’s in. Yet, she loves you, think of the amount of tears she has cried over the last three days for you, prayed for you. She loves you so much more than I ever could.” She leans her forehead on mine. “Give her your beautiful heart, Cain, it belongs to her, not me.”

Tess pulls away from me, and looks down at Autumn laughing, she’s telling me the story about a customer coming to the shop and what they had written on the card.

“She rambles all the time.” I listen to Autumn, before tuning back to Tess.

“Do you love her, Cain?” The question I’ve been asking myself, and don’t know what to say.

“Tess, I tried to push her away from me, I can’t let her live in fear. Before when it was just me, dying didn’t scare me, but I’m so scared I’ll lose her. I don’t want to lose her.” I look back down at Autumn wiping the tears away, as Hayden stands behind her rubbing her shoulders.

“You know Hayden has done so much for you. He helped when I was around, and he’s there for her. You owe him a lot.” Tess lets out a chuckle, and now I see Hayden from here, that man has done a lot for me.

“She would be-”

“Cain. You’re so scared of hurting again, you won’t open yourself to her. You would rather her feel the pain of losing you, than for you to feel the pain of loving again?” Oh, Tess has hit it with this statement.

But is she right?

Am I too scared to give Autumn everything, because I’m scared of being hurt again?

“The demons still live inside me, families are after me all the time, how can I make her live this life?” My voice breaks a little, because I can’t have anything happen to Autumn because of me. I can’t allow it.

“And you told her all this, and she’s still here. I knew she would be perfect for you. I did everything I could to push you two together. I can’t believe how stubborn you are.” I shake my head, and turn to Tess when she gets off the wall, looking down at Autumn shouting.

“What’s happening?” I ask her.

“They’re losing you, and I’m not letting you stay here. Fight this, Cain. Be the man I fell in love with. Fight. Fight this Cain.” Tess leans in closer, gives me a soft gentle kiss, then pushes me into The Pit.

I wave my hands into the air, I don’t have a rope around me, I’m going to hit the ground hard.

Without warning, a sharp, searing gasp jerks me awake. My lungs inhale the air because it feels like I’ve not had any in them for a while. Raw and agonizing as if my body had temporarily forgotten how to breathe. I cough violently, my chest burns, as I come back to consciousness. The sound of my racing heartbeat thumps in my ears, and the pain in my chest returns with a vengeance, burning and more intense than a few seconds ago.

Fuck.

Blinking a few times, I try to focus on what’s happening around me, but everything is blurry.

“Cain, stay still.” I hear a voice, but can’t think whose it is.

“Cain, man let Doc work on you.” Lincoln, I know that’s Lincoln.

“Autu…Autu-”

“She’s here, she’s safe. Let’s get you checked out first,” Lincoln shouts.

I fight my body to calm down, but it feels like it’s on fire at the moment. Reminding myself I’m in the best hands, Doc will get me back to one hundred percent. My body slowly relaxes, as I look around the room wanting to see Autumn.

There she is in the corner of the bedroom, her arms wrapped around her waist, she looks so scared, tired.

Hayden has his arm around her. Comforting her as best he can. She looks at me, and I smile, well the best I can. She needs to know I’m good, I’m fighting this fight.

Doc told me to stay in bed for the day just to recover which made everyone laugh. I’m awake and I'm not laying in bed. Right now the only thing I want to do is show my girl how much I’ve fucking missed her. But I haven’t been able to move because Doc is taking his time removing all the wires.

I watch Autumn talking to Lincoln and she shakes her head, she looks like she’s not slept in days. Lincoln will catch me up with everything, and by the end of the day I will know what’s happening, and what my next step for Yang is.

“Cain, you need at least a week before you fight, or go to The Pit. I’m wasting my breath telling you this because I know you well enough.” Doc finally removes everything, and I push the covers off me.

“Everyone out.” Without a word, everyone leaves my bedroom. The family has never been to my apartment and now they’re in my bedroom. But I don’t care, because while I’ve been unconscious, they’ve looked after my Rose.

Getting out of bed, I wrap my arms around Autumn, I feel her muscles relax against me. Her arms are tight around me, as if she’s scared of losing me again, her tears fall onto the fabric of my shirt. The sound of her sobs echoes in the small space between us. I hold her close and let her cry, knowing this is what she needs right now.

“I…I was so…scared.” She stutters on the words, but I don’t say anything to her, because I can see how scared she was, and right now no words will help her. Kissing the top of her head, I pull her away from me, and she finally looks up at me.

Wiping the tears away from her cheeks, I smile. “I’m a hard man to kill, I’m not going anywhere.” I lean down and kiss her. I’ve missed her lips and missed her touch.

“Please don’t joke about this. You can’t leave me.” She grips my t-shirt and looks down at my chest. “You were shot, twice, and I was scared-”

“Autumn, I have no plans on leaving you. You’re stuck with me for a long time, because you are my English Rose, and I love you so fucking much-” Her lips crash into mine before I can finish what I wanted to say, but her whole body feels relaxed next to mine, so I don’t care. Finally she pulls away from me, and smiles. “I love you, Autumn-Rose.”

“I love you so much, Cain.” She blinks and more tears escape her beautiful eyes.

“Why are you crying?” I ask her.

“Because I’ve found my Prince Charming, and he loves me.” I can’t help but laugh.

“I’m no Prince Charming, but I can be the dark romantic villain.” I kiss her once again, all I want to do is kiss her every second of the day.

“I’ll take it. I’ll take you anyway I can.” She smiles, which I wasn’t sure I would see her do for a while, but it's a beautiful sight. “Shall we go out, not sure what your brothers are going to think we are doing. They are some characters aren’t they? And did you know Miles doesn’t even need his glasses, he just wears them because he thinks it gives him character. Seriously?” she asks, and I say nothing, because they probably have kept it quiet for her.

She goes to walk away from me, but I pull her back, and kiss her once again. Leaning my forehead on hers, my hand softly placed on the side of her neck.

“I’m sorry for bringing you into my darkness, but I promise nothing will ever happen to you. I can’t lose you, my heart can’t take it.” My voice is low and soft, because I need her to know how much she means to me, not just now, but until my last breath.

“And mine can’t take losing you,” she whispers back.

Everything around us fades into a blur as we stand in silence, lost in our own world. Her body fits perfectly against mine, her warmth seeping through my clothes and igniting a fire within me. I hold her close, feeling the steady rhythm of her heartbeat against my skin, a comforting reminder she's here with me. The moment feels suspended in time, and I never want it to end.

Taking her hand in mine, we leave the bedroom, and Aunt Jane is the first one to wrap her arms around me, followed by Uncle David, and then the boys. Lincoln stays where he is, and I turn to face him.

“You had me scared there for a minute, you fucker. Don’t do it again.” He walks over to me, and pulls me into a bear hug, patting my back a few times, which fucking hurts, proving my body needs time to heal.

I look around, surprised I don’t see mom. “I said to call her, but your Uncle said no,” Aunt Jane informs me, and I give Uncle David a nod, because I’m happy with his decision.

“Time to catch me up.” I turn to Lincoln, because I know he’s the only one who will tell me everything and not worry about pissing me off.

“These four have been enjoying the sixth floor, they said they can’t leave the building, and have an itch they need fixing-”

“It was meant to stay between us,” Mason and Hayden both joke with Lincoln, and I shake my head at them both.

“The fifth floor is out of service, a fight broke out, full of assholes, and before you say anything, the asshole is paying for the damages. Rowan is here, and has made-” Lincoln stops when I put my hand up and turn to Autumn.

“I think this is something you should have mentioned.” She smiles, not sure why, because I’m annoyed this is something she should have told me. I knew Yang had connected with Rowan, and if he wanted to bring him to the States, it would have been while I was shot, and fighting to live. It would be when Autumn was vulnerable, and could get to her. I know Yang well enough to know how his mind is working, he’s going to hit me with everything he can, and Rowan is going to be part of the game plan, I just won’t know how yet.

“You said I love you to me, I wasn’t going to ruin your mood.” Autumn’s smile is even bigger now.

“Fuck, you said it?”

“Oh my God, the man has a heart.”

“Fucking hell.”

The guys all say something in shock, a part of me doesn’t blame them for being surprised.

“You know I'm not dead inside,” I snap at them all, and they all start laughing.

“Are you sure?”

“Could have fooled us.”

“Have you met yourself?” Again they all throw a comment or two my way. Ignoring them I turn back to Lincoln who has a smile plastered on his face.

“Like them, I’m happy to punch the smile off your face too. Now carry on.” I take the beer from Hayden, how can my head be hurting with the amount of pain medication Doc has given me,

“Rowan was at the shop, Autumn has been here the whole time.” Lincoln stops when Aunt Jane stands in front of me.

“I know you need to talk, but we need to eat. Autumn and I will get something ready.” She places her hand on my cheek with a smile, then kisses the other cheek. They both walk over to the kitchen, and I watch Autumn for a moment, and I hope now Lincoln will tell me what's happening with her.

“She’s not sleeping, every time she closes her eyes, the night replays in her head.” I turn back to Lincoln, and the boys. “She fell asleep, but woke up scared to the point she was shaking, I think it was about thirty minutes, if that.” He looks over at Autumn smiling. “It’s the first time she looks like her normal self. Crazy, but I’ve missed her rambling.”

“She watches a lot of crap on T.V.” Mason laughs.

“Rowan called the shop, and he's been there every day. He might even call again. He didn’t say much, just that he will get her back, but before you freak out she’s been here, and hasn’t left. There’s been nothing from Yang, no movement, he’s not even left his apartment.” Lincoln finishes what he’s saying.

I take a slow sip of my cold beer, the sharp, rich mixed with sweet sits on my tongue. I instinctively move to the window, my eyes scanning the area where the bullet had pierced my skin. My gaze travels up the side of the building across the road, searching for any signs of movement or danger. He might wait for me to wake up and walk around, ready to tell Yang I’m not dead. He must have been on the roof, watching me with his finger on the trigger. But the burning question is, how long had he been watching my every move? Was it days, weeks, months? I let my guard down, and it sends shivers down my spine as I continue to look over the rooftop.

“Miles check the CCTV footage for the roof, see how long he was watching me?” There is silence, telling me he’s already done it. “How long was he watching me?”

“Two weeks.” Miles' voice hits my ears, and I look up at the roof, the bastard was waiting until I let my guard down that night.

“Cain?”

“Yeah?” I turn back to Lincoln.

“What's the plan?” All eyes are on me, even Aunt Jane’s, and Autumn’s from the kitchen. Everyone in this room is my family, and I know, no matter what, they will protect Autumn from anything that comes her way. But what Yang wants they can’t help me with.

“Two choices, not give Yang what he wants, and wait for the next attack, or give him what he wants and end this all.” My eyes lock with Lincoln because he knows what Yang is capable of, and how hard I’m going to have to fight.

“And we’ll fight together,” Uncle David is the first to talk, but my silence already answers the question he wants to ask. “You’ll have to fight alone.”

Finishing my beer, I place it on the table, giving myself a moment. “Let’s see what he wants first. Lincoln, Hayden, Uncle, and Mason you’re with me. Miles, Declan you good to watch over Autumn?” They both nod, and I look over at Autumn hoping to give her some reassurance that everything will be fine. “Hayden, can I have a word?” I ask walking outside to the balcony, and he follows. I wasn’t really giving him a choice but to follow me.

“They made me go to the sixth floor,” Hayden quickly tells me as the door closes behind him, and I roll my eyes. They know I don’t say anything to them about going up there, but they need to ask before they go. Hayden leans on the wall behind him, placing one foot on the wall.

Opening up and expressing myself has never been my strong suit, especially with my family, but it's time Hayden knows just how much he means to me, and saying thank you to him for everything is a good start. I rack my brain for the words, but I’m coming up empty.

Placing my hand on my wound, I start feeling the pain hitting me.

“Cain-”

“Hayden, I’ve never said thank you to you. You were there for Tess, when I couldn’t be. No matter what happens you will always be there for me, and I’ve never said thank you.”

“And I never wanted you to. You’re my brother, it might have taken you some time to realize it, but we’re family. No matter the time, the place, the situation I will always be there. Like I know you would for me.”

“You wouldn’t even have to finish the sentence. I’ll kill whoever you want.” My reply makes Hayden laugh,

“You said I love you today, but killing someone is still what you’re thinking about.” Hayden shakes his head and pushes himself off the wall and stands in front of me. “Don’t push us away now.”

I look over his shoulder at everyone standing in the kitchen. “I don’t think I could get rid of you guys even if I wanted to,” I joke, and Hayden laughs agreeing with me.

Tonight the fight continues, but it will end soon.