Death and Desire (Love in Cairo #1)

Chapter Eighteen

S tanding in the dark , staring over the moonlit garden, Violet sipped gin from a delicate glass. The pain had dulled to a persistent ache. Blame it on the liquor, but truly, she could blame no one but herself. Shame had taken root somewhere between those tense moments at Club Cairo and her hasty request for room service to deliver a cold bottle of her favorite gin.

How she’d managed to return to the hotel without a scene proved a masterful stroke of luck with a healthy dose of determination on her part.

Caught between rage and regret, Violet discovered a balance and managed to stem her tears long enough to locate Dina. Feigning illness, she begged her friend’s forgiveness before retreating from the club. Dina had offered to escort her to the hotel, but she didn’t wish to ruin her friend’s evening...as she’d ruined every other outing in Cairo thus far.

Besides, Violet craved isolation. Anything to keep from having to explain this sudden shift in her demeanor. Dina’s brow furrowed with concern. As much as she wished to bring her friend into her confidence and relay every detail of the disastrous encounter, Violet felt nothing but shame at having been tricked and betrayed—yet again—by a handsome stranger.

The cab ride to the hotel passed in a blur, and she hurried through the hotel lobby, praying she wouldn’t encounter her father or brother. Or David. There was nothing she desired more than the confines of her room and a bottle of strong liquor to numb the pain.

Armed with her second glass, Violet’s unfocused gaze skimmed the garden expanse before her. The events of the evening slowly receded, replaced by darker, carnal thoughts of stolen moments in the greenery below. Her face warmed at the memory, and while she indulged the slow unfurling of desire in the pit of her stomach, she refused to let memories linger lest she call out for him in a moment of pure desperation.

It had taken all her restraint not to call for him when she found her prized possession gone.

He chose his path. She would do well to remember that.

Violet tensed as a familiar sensation snaked along her limbs, curling through her body like a mist over the morning sea. Warmth flooded her veins that had nothing to do with gin. The caress lingered for only a moment before fading to a whispered breath, leaving her body humming. She closed her eyes and sighed.

Violet was no longer alone.

“Why have you come?” Her voice trembled as she posed the question.

“Do you wish for me to leave?” The silken tenor held a rough edge.

She didn’t need to turn to know Anubis stood behind her. Not Khalid. There was a subtle difference in his voice when he changed forms. Khalid had the edge of an Arabic accent, while Anubis’s cadence reverberated with an ancient authority.

Violet despised how attuned she was to him in both forms.

“I should never have come to Egypt.” The confession slipped from her lips before she could think better of it. The darkness and the liquor had loosened her inhibitions. There was no reason to lie. Not when he could read her thoughts and sense her emotions.

There were no barriers between her and Anubis. Not anymore. She saw him for what he truly was—a mythical god born of a long-forgotten civilization. A monster.

“Why do you remain?” Anubis half murmured the question over her shoulder.

Violet shivered at his proximity. He stood directly behind her, his heat and scent surrounding her with every breath. In this form, he towered over her. How he fit in the room, she did not understand. Part of her wanted to turn, to face him, commit every detail of his face to memory. But she knew if she did so, her nerves would falter and reveal every fragile piece of her soul.

A tear slipped free. Then another.

“Damn you,” she cursed him.

He plucked the empty glass from her and set it aside. His enormous black clawed hand was deceptively delicate in the simple action.

“You did this to me.” Violet spun, bracing herself for the god before her but failing miserably.

Her heart stuttered at the sight of him. His height and breadth were formidable in the confines of her room, yet he looked at ease in her presence, as though he belonged there. His brilliant golden eyes regarded her with a softness she hadn’t anticipated.

“I am sorry for any pain I caused you. It was unintentional.”

Her breath caught at the unexpected apology, but it did nothing to soothe her ire. “Unintentional?” She scoffed, swiping angrily at the tears betraying her emotion. “Every single word out of your mouth has been full of intention. Every time you stepped into my dreams. With every gentle nudge urging me to come to this cursed place, you made your intention clear. It was never me you wanted...only your precious stone.”

He straightened but said nothing. His canine expression remained as immovable as his human one, as though carved from stone. She pushed her hand against his chest and felt the slow, steady beat of his heart beneath her palm. A reminder of his intent. His goal.

“You have your heart. Now leave me mine.” Her voice cracked on the word, shattering what remained of her resolve. “I–I can’t...”

“Why did you not call for me tonight?” Anubis traced a finger along her jaw.

“What?” Violet snapped, startled by the question, her body thrumming with awareness of his touch, the soft scrape of his nail along her throat as he caressed her skin.

“Did you think I would not remain true to my word? That I would cast you aside once I retrieved my heart?”

“You are under no obligation to protect me.” Restraint stretched tight beneath tension as it pulled them closer.

“But I am.” He tilted her chin as he knelt before her, bringing them eye-to-eye. “The bond between us remains. A golden thread from your heart”—he pressed a fingertip to the valley of her breasts—“to mine. No distance can come between us. Not even death.”

Heat flared beneath his contact. His eyes glowed, an eternal flame flickering in darkness, searching the depths of her soul.

“I saw you take his hand. Felt the beat of your heart when he stole your breath.” Anubis’s fingertip blazed a trail over her abdomen before resting on her hip. “You surrendered to him so easily.” He inclined his head. “Why?”

No words would form. He’d followed her to the club. Felt everything she felt. How could he not know?

“You chose your heart over me.” She ignored the press of his hand, the heat swirling around them, and redirected her fury. “You saw what transpired, yet you did nothing? You could have stopped him.”

“Stopped him from doing what?”

“Making a fool of me.” She bit back a sob. “He stole my locket. The last connection I have to my mother is gone.”

“He stole your jewelry, but he can never steal her memory .”

“But she gave it to me, entrusted me with it.” Violet relented to the flow of grief inside her. “Now I have nothing left of her.”

“You will always carry her with you.” He closed his eyes.

A soft, effervescent light filled the room. Violet blinked through tears to admire the glow of stardust encircling them. Then she saw it, figures in the swirling sand. Her mother playing the piano. Laughing over tea. Picking wildflowers in the meadow. Reading her favorite books to Violet on the sofa in the library.

They were her memories.

“How?” She reached out to touch the glittering image, her fingers drifting through them, scattering them into darkness.

Anubis opened his eyes and studied her face. “You carry them. Here.” He touched her temple. “And here.” He pressed a fingertip to her heart.

Violet grasped his hand, holding it between hers, the velvet of his fur soft beneath her touch and the warmth of his presence filled her with comfort.

Her tears fell freely. She missed her mother dreadfully. The ache surrounding her loss had never truly healed. Even this trip to Cairo had been some sort of desperate attempt to bridge the insurmountable chasm between her and her mother. But it was no use. She would never again see her mother in this life nor fill the void of her absence.

“Over the course of my existence,” Anubis began, his voice rough but tender, “death and I have become well acquainted. Those who enter my domain are touched by him. I see their lives. Their loves. Their deaths. In the stolen moments before they meet judgment, I uncover the heart of their humanity.”

Violet met his gaze. Lost in luminescence, she listened, still clutching his hand between hers and drawing on his strength, his presence. This was no mortal man, and yet, he was far more than an ancient deity.

“I grew... attached .” Anubis paused, his jaw twitching as he clenched it closed, almost as if the confession left him ashamed.

With a gentle brush of her fingertips across his palm, Violet wordlessly coaxed him to continue.

“Each soul entrusted to me had lived . Their experiences, no matter how limited or vast, gave them depth. They found love and purpose. Their life gave them value.” His heavy sigh echoed through the room. “I envied them.”

“But you are alive.” She stroked the inside of his wrist, stopping at the gold bands encasing his forearms. “I can feel your heartbeat.”

“I live, yes, but I never knew passion from a life of my choosing.” He regarded her thoughtfully before shaking his head. “Seeing those in my care with such a gift left me despondent and frustrated. So I asked Ra to remove my heart...to return my focus to my purpose.”

“When your mother left Egypt, she unknowingly took my heart with her.” A ghost of a smile appeared on his canine lips. “And entrusted it to you.”

“Anubis, I—”

He pressed a finger to her lips. “For years, I was furious at the thought of a child holding my single greatest treasure. I grew angry at myself for removing it, for placing myself in such a vulnerable position. But over time, my anger and regret subsided.”

“I watched over you from a distance, unable to do anything but reach out to you through the bond.” His voice deepened, betraying emotions his face couldn’t show. “I planted the desire in your heart to come to Egypt to return what had been wrongfully taken.

“The moment you arrived in Cairo, your presence pulsed through me like a drum.” He licked his teeth, as though remembering long-forgotten hunger. “Dreams were no longer enough. I had to see you. Touch you.”

Anubis removed his dark hand from her grasp and traced his fingertips along her jaw. “The bond between us pulled sharp and hard somewhere beneath my ribs, twisting until I relented.”

Violet hummed at his caress. “The gala.”

“You came to me without prompting, without invitation.” His smile appeared again, more prominent this time. “As though our fates were woven together.”

What was he saying? Was there more to this than the jewel and the bond it had created? Hope unfurled in her chest, warm like sunrise over the treetops.

“What if it was just the jewel calling you?” Violet asked, dazed and captivated.

“I believed the same.” Anubis cradled her jaw in his hand. “When you returned the jewel, I expected the bond to break.”

Her heart thundered in her chest, and the soft brush of his thumb on her lower lip left her knees weak.

“I saw you with him tonight. I felt your reaction to him. Your desire.” Anubis growled, low and menacing. “Tell me, little flower, did you want him to claim you?”

“I—” Heat blossomed across her cheeks as fear skittered down her spine. Not of him, but of his unwavering assessment as he delved into her thoughts and stripped her bare. She dropped her gaze, unable to face him.

“Look at me, Violet.” He waited until her attention returned to him. “There is no shame in desire.”

“Then why bring it up?” She seethed. “It was a lapse in judgment. A mistake! I was hurt and lonely and...you had your heart. There was no longer any reason for you to remain with me.”

“Violet.” He said her name slowly, the syllables ringing in her head. His tone shifted. Soft and firm, like chastisement, bursting with sensual implications, leaving her body trembling, her undergarments damp. “The bond remains.”

“Wha—?” She snapped her mouth closed and shook her head. “How is that possible? I no longer possess the jewel.”

“I know.” Anubis’s soft growl made butterflies take flight in the pit of her stomach.

“But...how?”

“I do not have the answer.” He toyed with a lock of hair that had escaped her simple braid.

“What does it mean?” Violet inhaled, savoring his scent as she drew closer. She placed her hand on his chest, just beneath the gold plate covering the place where his heart rested.

“It means you are not safe.”

“Not safe?”

“Seth knows the truth. He will do whatever it takes to possess the jewel.”

“How does he know about the jewel...your heart, I mean?”

“I wish I knew the answer.” Anubis drew her hand from his chest and held it in his. “The only one who knew of it was Ra.”

“Why was it so important to keep secret?” Violet asked, leaning closer, distracted by his comforting touch.

“In the right circumstances, it could be used to give immortality.”

“But Seth is already immortal. What good would that do?”

“With it, he could destroy anyone who challenged him.” Anubis’s confession drifted through the air like smoke. “He will use any and all means at his disposal to take the jewel.”

“Why would he come after me ?” Violet struggled to make the connection. Without the jewel, she was nothing. A worthless human to be crushed without effort.

Anubis pulled her into his embrace. Stunned, she fell against his solid warmth and wrapped her arms around his neck. He buried his nose in her shoulder, inhaling deeply. She shivered and clung tighter to him, ignoring the way her body reacted to being cradled to his towering form.

“He will come for you because of me.” His soft nose teased the skin of her neck. “Because of our bond. Because...”

Violet held her breath, basking in his confession. Her hold on him tightened.

“I desire no other as I do you,” he finished.

She drew back, forcing him to meet her gaze. His golden eyes burned with flicking heat. “You desire me?”

“With every fiber of my being.” His voice reverberated through her. “Since that stolen moment of passion in the garden, I can think of nothing but you. Nothing can purge the memory of my fingers deep in your slick heat or the sweet sounds of your pleasure.” He licked his teeth again. “I want to taste you. Devour you. Nothing will sate this hunger. Desire has consumed me. I long for you alone, my little flower.”

Violet shuddered when Anubis slid his hand from her waist to her thigh. The folds of her dressing gown fell open, and she wrapped her legs around his hips. All that lay between them were his gilded kilt and the silk of her undergarments.

She rocked against him, craving the heat of friction and the pleasure he promised.

“Anubis, show me.” She sighed against his muzzle and pressed a soft kiss to his midnight skin. “I am yours.”