Destined for the Fae King (Courts of Faery #3)

Chapter 18

I turn down a path in the hedge maze, not looking or caring where I go.

“This is going great. So great,” I mumble, my voice squeaking more than I’d ever admit.

I want this, don’t I? I was so excited to get to Faery. And the prospect of marrying a king, becoming a queen? I was genuinely thrilled about it. Who doesn’t want to be a royal? Yes, my uncle kind of shoved me onto this path, but it’s one I wanted to go down.

I want to be here.

Entering this contest, winning it, could fix everything. As queen, I’d have more than enough money to support my family for generations. Check the box on keeping Mom and my brothers taken care of, as well as pleasing Uncle Matias and Aunt Dalia. Selena would be taken care of too. I’d get to stay in Faery, the world I’ve dreamed about all my life. I’d marry a great man who is handsome, respected, and powerful. I would be respected and powerful, not just some poor girl on the outskirts of the coven who doesn’t fit in anywhere. It’s the life I’ve dreamed about for years. It’s what I want .

“But what if I don’t want it?” I fling my hands down in exasperation as I round another corner, the hedges a blur of color in my periphery. I hardly notice them, or anything, beyond my thoughts racing one after another.

It’s not like I didn’t try. He was only going to pick one of us anyway, right? So, it’s okay if it’s not me. No one can say I embarrassed the family name. Hopefully, I’ll still get some gifts or something to support the family. Maybe they’ll even let me stay, you know, far away from here, where my uncle can’t find me and call me an embarrassment or something? Yes, Mira, excellent idea.

I let out a groan and drop my face into my palms.

Damn it, this is not how things were supposed to go.

It was supposed to be magical. Fireworks and all that. He was supposed to realize he wanted me, I was supposed to want him, and we would live happily ever after like in a fairy tale.

A bird call snares my attention, and I glance up, taking in the bright blue sky above. One breath after another fills my lungs, calming some of my racing thoughts. I didn’t know I wasn’t going to feel anything. How could I know that?

“Maybe the feelings will come?” I ask a bird as it flies by. “Just because there’s nothing now doesn’t mean it can’t be something, someday, right?”

But even as I say it, I know it for the lie it is. The king is not mine. He never will be. There would have been something there. The little sparks I’d felt around him wouldn’t have faltered and gone out so completely.

“Not the kiss you’d hoped for?” says a deep voice.

The sudden question has me nearly leaping out of my skin. As it is, I spring off the ground, nearly falling in my haste to twist around. I might have screamed, had a gasp not lodged itself in my throat .

Lysandir stands in the middle of the pathway. His crossed arms are the only thing that belie the apparent carefree ease with which he stands there, legs spread, taking up far too much space.

“You.” I fill the word with all the accusation I can muster. “Why are you here?”

“You appeared to be in distress, so I followed you to make sure you were okay.”

Distress! I almost laugh at the nonsense of it all.

“I’m fine. Perfectly fine,” I blurt.

His brows pinch, head twitching in apparent confusion before a look of clarity sparks in his eyes and his features smooth out. He sighs. “You humans and your lies.”

I’m not lying, I want to say. But I am. I so am.

A hard look settles over his features. One hand lifts like he might reach for me, before he drops it again. “Mira, did my brother do something to you?”

Heat rushes to my face. I want to sink below the dirt and hide. “How much did you see?”

“Enough.” He crosses his arms. “Kissing someone you hope to marry shouldn’t leave you like this.”

“Shouldn’t it?” I ask, voice filled with bite. “When I know that he’s probably kissing all the other women too?”

Lysandir winces at that. The small tingle of satisfaction I feel isn’t nearly enough, but it’s something.

“Still,” he continues, “a kiss should make you feel something but not—”

The calm tone of his voice raises my hackles.

“The only one making me feel anything right now is you,” I snap. He doesn’t deserve my anger. Distantly, I know that. But all my walls are crumbling, and he’s the only one nearby to fling the debris at .

“I was going to say, happiness. Joy. Pleasure,” he replies with that same annoyingly even tone. “Not…” He gestures toward me. “So, what did he do, Mira?”

“He just kissed me, okay? Nothing else. He was perfectly respectable.” A bit too much.

Lysandir crosses his arms again. Something flickers across his features that I can’t decipher. “So, it wasn’t him then, but your reaction to the kiss?”

The words land like a shove to my chest, and I step back, lips thin.

“Just leave me alone, okay?” Let me wallow in peace for goodness sake! I turn on my heel and hurry back down the pathway, as fast as I can go and still call it a walk. I don’t need to look behind me to know that Lysandir follows. I can feel him. I always feel him, like he has his own kind of gravity that inevitably pulls me toward him.

I turn a corner, not slowing down. The path forks just ahead, and I make another quick right, hoping to lose him. Another two steps and the path splits again, so I make another sharp turn.

My feet skid on the dirt pathway as I come to an abrupt stop, taking in the sight before me. The narrow path has opened into a circular space with a fountain in the middle and a few benches around it, varying trails leading off in two other directions.

But that’s not what has my eyes flying wide.

Adeline is locked in an embrace with one of the guards. His hand is fisted in her hair, tilting her head back so he can kiss her neck. A soft moan slips from her pink lips.

Adeline. Sweet, innocent Adeline, kissing someone who is decidedly not the king we’re supposed to be wooing. It’s against the rules. Treasonous. But beyond the shock of seeing her like this, there’s a little thought whispering in my ear that’s louder than all the rest.

You’re not the only one.

Her cheeks are flushed, eyes closed in pleasure. But they could open at any moment, and she’s at the perfect angle to see me standing there gawking like an idiot. It’s not me she needs to worry about though.

I rush back around the corner, encountering Lysandir just a few steps from coming upon a scene that he can’t see.

“Mira?” He looks me up and down, a question in his eyes as well as his words.

Without thinking, I wrap my fingers around his upper arm and try to haul him with me as I move past. “Let’s go this way.”

But I might as well be trying to move a tree for all that he budges.

“What…” He stares at my hand on his arm like it’s an alien thing then back toward the direction I’d just come from.

Another ungentle tug and his attention whips back to me.

His gaze narrows. “There’s something there.”

Shit. Maybe they’re done. Maybe he wouldn’t see anything too damning, but every instinct in me screams that’s not the case. He rolls his shoulder, trying to pull free from my grip, and I panic.

“Lysandir.” I practically jump in front of him, blocking the way back. “Please.”

There’s a moment of hesitation, a slight widening of his eyes that makes me think he’s listening to me. But then he glances past me, and my stomach drops straight to the ground.

So, I do the only thing that I know will stop him.

I grab his face with both hands, stretch up on the tips of my toes, and drag him down until I smash my lips against his .

The reaction is instant. My body jolts like I’ve been shocked. My chest constricts like my ribs are trying to reach my spine, and there’s a sudden wobble in my legs that wasn’t there a moment ago.

The kiss should be nothing. A distraction. A con.

But God, it feels like I’ve been knocked down by a wave and swept under. And those are Lysandir’s arms wrapping around me, holding me up and cradling me like I’m something precious. At some point, I closed my eyes, and I open them, catching sight of his soft lashes along his closed lids. Something caught between a sigh and a moan rumbles amid our kiss, and he pulls me tighter.

Like he feels something too. Like this isn’t a farce.

Like I’m not bound to his brother and trying to become his bride.

That thought douses me in ice, and I pull back, breathing hard and head spinning. Lysandir lets me go but not fully. His strong palm still rests against my lower back, the touch firm and possessive in a way that melts something in me.

But it shouldn’t. It’s not him I’m supposed to want, damn it.

Lysandir’s eyes flutter open. The pupils are blown wide, leaving his eyes dark. His chest rises and falls, and all his attention is glued to my face.

“Mira.”

The way he says my name has my insides flopping over themselves. He fills it with so much—heat and fire that have nothing to do with his magic. I can almost understand why women swoon.

A crunch of gravel and rustle of the hedges are the only warning before Adeline and her guard round the corner, but it’s enough. Lysandir drops his hand and steps back so quickly I nearly fall, and do end up leaning back against the hedge, its stiff branches poking into my back .

“Oh, hello!” Adeline’s voice is a little too high. “We thought we heard someone else here.”

The giggle that comes out is so forced and off it’s a dead giveaway for her nerves. The guard doesn’t look at us, instead keeping his eyes averted toward the ground like a scolded kid caught stealing a cookie. Or in this case, a kiss.

Look more guilty, why don’t you?

I recognize him now. Erymis, the guard assigned to her. He’s the same one she often talks to after yoga. I thought it was just friendship, but clearly I was way wrong.

I shove off the bushes, wincing as a branch scrapes my forearm. “I just got a little overwhelmed at the party and Prince Lysandir walked with me to make sure I was okay.” I spear him with a glance that dares him to say otherwise. “Very gallant of him.”

“Oh, me too.” Adeline shoves at her hair as if that could fix the section at the back that the guard thoroughly mussed. “Erymis kept me company. It was so nice of him.”

Erymis studiously avoids looking at us and gives a little bow. “Since Lady Adeline has companions once more, I shall depart.”

His words still hang in the air when he vanishes.

“Erymis …” The dejection in her voice is so clear it’s a wonder Lysandir hasn’t mentioned anything about it. In fact, he hasn’t spoken a word, and I’ve been too nervous to even look at him.

“Walk with me.” I slide my arm through Adeline’s and tug her alone like we’re two Victorian ladies on promenade.

Lysandir falls into step somewhere behind us. If not for the steady feel of his gaze leaving tingles down my back, I might have thought he’d stayed behind. But no such luck. Every step back toward the party, all I can think about is our kiss. It’s marked me like a scarlet letter across my chest, haunting me with the thought that somehow everyone will know what I did .

“Why are we going so fast?” Adeline asks.

The question drags me back to the moment, and I slow my pace. I hadn’t even realized I was dragging us along like a champion speed walker.

“Don’t you want to see the king?” It’s a cruel jab, and I regret it the moment it’s out.

Adeline flinches and pulls away, coming to an abrupt halt. “How much did you see?”

I drop my voice to a whisper. “Too much. And you should be glad I kept Lysandir from seeing it as well.”

Said fae prince has stopped further back on the path, giving us some semblance of privacy, thank goodness.

A deep flush colors her cheeks below her freckles. “Mira, I can explain.”

I sigh and loop my arm through hers, turning her back in the direction we were headed. “You don’t need to. I won’t tell.”

Her head snaps toward me. “You won’t?”

“Not a word.”

“But why?” She leans her head back, almost like I’ve slapped her, as if this act of decency is some kind of trick or deception. “You could damn me.” Her whisper is almost a hiss. “Destroy my chances.”

“You’re interested in someone else.” I shrug. “That’s no big deal.”

She stares at the dirt as we walk. “It is here.”

The reply is so soft I barely hear it.

And damn, don’t I know it. The back of my neck burns at the memory of what I just did, the feel of Lysandir’s lips against mine that I can’t erase no matter how I try to block it out.

We round a corner, sounds of the party growing louder, and Adeline quickly looks up and over at me. “And what were you doing in the maze? ”

“Taking a moment to breath, as I said.”

She cocks one brow. “With the prince?”

I attempt a shrug with our linked arms.

“He followed me. Apparently, he’s good at that.” I shoot a glare over one shoulder before we make another left.

“Wrong way,” Lysandir calls from behind us.

I jerk to a halt, more annoyed than I have any right to be. How can I long for him in one moment and loathe him the next? Adeline and I turn around and head down the other side of the split in the path.

“Thank you,” I reply with a little courteous nod.

Lysandir gives a little bow and sweep of his arm in return, which I swear is a mocking gesture meant to get under my skin. Bastard.

Finally, we make it out of the maze, and Adeline sucks in a deep, steady breath as she takes in the many fae milling about. Her arm tightens on mine.

“You promise you won’t tell?” she asks, leaning in so only I can hear her.

“Promise.”

She untangles from me but then takes my hand in hers and gives a little squeeze. “Thank you. For that and…understanding.”

More than you know.

The moment she hurries off, the air around me grows thick and tense. I’d swear the temperature rises too—and this is the Court of Fire, so maybe it does. It wouldn’t surprise me if Lysandir’s presence alone could affect that. Or maybe he only has that effect on me.

Tension coils around my chest, leaving it tight and hollow all at once as he steps to my side. In his hand, he holds the thick green stems of two massive, red flowers. A sweet, heady scent wafts from them, only addling my senses further. If you could drug someone with a whiff of a flower, this one would do it.

“Take these.” Lysandir holds them out to me.

They might as well be snakes for how terrifying the offer is.

“You’re giving me flowers? Here?” In front of everyone? I stare at him wide-eyed. My God, he really does want to paint a scarlet letter on me.

“Hurry and give one to your friend.” He practically shoves the stalks at me. “Fae sense of smell is much greater than a human’s. These are pungent and will help cover the scent.”

“The scent of what?”

Lysandir stares at me hard, his face impassive and still save for a blink of his eyes. The answer hits me square in the chest.

“She—They weren’t—” I blurt.

But he knows.

Damn it all, he knows exactly what they were doing, despite my attempted distraction.

“Please.” I reach for him, dropping my hand just before I grab his sleeve. His gaze snaps to it, eyes widening as he follows the path of my hand as it drops. “I promised. You can’t tell.”

His gaze snaps back to my face, his form still cold and impassive like the fae royal he is, other than his eyes which swirl with emotion.

“Please.” The readiness with which I’d drop to my knees and beg him shocks me. “Don’t give her—them—away. For me. Please.”

His throat bobs, the only sign of emotion in his features. Finally, his impassive fa?ade cracks, and his shoulders droop on a sigh. “I won’t.”

The single phrase releases the noose of panic from my neck .

“No one will hear of it from me.” His stance loosens, and he rubs the back of his neck. “But she has to be more careful. Keep her distance for now, disguise the scent.”

I nod. The advice is for her, but I can’t help feel like it’s more for me than anything. And with that, all the emotions of moments ago rush back, flooding me with a fire that makes me want to char to ash right there.

“What I did, back there in the hedges… I—” I want to say I’m sorry, that I regret it, that it was a trick, but the words don’t come out, almost like the magic that binds the fae to truth is trying to hold me to it as well.

“You wanted to keep me from seeing whatever you saw.”

My lips wrinkle themselves up then flatten out. It’s true. I did, but hearing him say it sounds so callous. And what I felt in that moment was anything but that.

He steps closer, and I suck in a breath, but there’s almost no air to inhale.

“I won’t tell anyone about that either.” His hand closes over mine where I clutch the stems.

The touch has me nearly jumping out of my skin, and from the way he stiffens and his hand tightens on mine, I know he feels something too. But any hesitation is there and gone in a flash. He guides the flowers up until the soft petals brush against my cheek then across my lips.

The party disappears as I stare into his eyes of molten gold, the crimson blooms a slow blur of movement at the bottom of my vision.

“To cover the scent.” He releases my hand, and I let the blooms drop down to my chest.

Because I can’t have his scent on me. Because someone might know, might suspect. I don’t have the heart to tell him Vasilius could already smell him on me, had already commented on it earlier. At least he didn’t have reason to suspect it anything other than innocent assistance in a yard game.

But what we did in the maze… It might have been impulsive, a tool to distract, but the lingering effects are anything but innocent.

“Thank you.” It’s all I can come up with before I turn and hurry after Adeline.

Staying with Lysandir a moment longer, the strange blooms flooding my senses, would have led to disaster. Because there’s one thing I know with certainty as I search for my friend.

Kissing Lysandir was everything.

Magic and heat and a force all its own.

It’s what kissing Vasilius should have been but wasn’t and I know deep down could never be. The rush of feeling in that moment, the way I can still feel his lips against mine and taste him on my tongue, has to mean something. It does mean something, the thing I’ve been trying to deny for days and can’t any longer.

I’ve gone and fallen for the wrong fae royal.