Deviant

Chapter 26

Rowen

After Henry leaves, an uncomfortable silence stretches through the room, as we continue to stare at each other, wondering which title belongs to who.

Murderer.

Murderer.

Murderer.

I feel as if that one word is tattooed on my forehead for everyone to read. I can still see it in bright neon red written on the wall, taunting me. If anyone here finds out what I did to Nora… Elias might not get his chance to kill me after all. Ruby immediately comes to mind as the one who wouldn’t think twice to end my life.

But then again, they all have secrets too.

Deep, dark, disturbing secrets.

‘Every person chosen… every last one selected… has a secret they don’t want anyone to know about.’

Those had been Joe’s exact words when we discussed The Scourge all those weeks ago. If only I could see my friend again just to tell him how right he was.

“Fine! I’ll fess up. Since no one is going to be the first to do it, might as well be me who gets the ball rolling,” Andy says, stepping into the center of the den, everyone’s eyes on him. “I’m not proud of it,” he begins, looking honestly ashamed for whatever he’s done, “But I was the one who burned down the gym three years back.”

“That was you?!” Harper’s eyes widen in surprise.

“The fuck, Scott!” David shouts like Andy’s confession is the worst thing he’s ever heard.

“I knew that he had some skeletons in his closet. Never trust a nice guy.” Ruby shakes her head.

Everyone shouts all at once, but the only question he actually responds to, is Harper’s.

“Andy… why?” she asks, confusion and distrust starting to mar her pretty features.

He sits next to her on the sofa, looking deeply ashamed for what he’s done.

“It was just supposed to be a joke,” he starts, his voice trembling slightly. “I set up some firecrackers around the gym for a laugh, but one of them hit a wire and caused a fuse to blow. I swear I looked for a fire extinguisher, but by the time I realized I was in over my head, the bleachers were already engulfed in flames. Panic took over, and instead of owning up to my mistake, I just ran away. This secret has been eating away at me and haunting me ever since.”

“Oh, Andy,” Harper coos, cradling her head on his shoulder. “I wish you had come clean earlier. That must have been weighing on your heart forever. Thank you for telling me the truth.”

“Are you for real, Harper? Are you just going to let that shit slide?” Ruby chastises. “The whole school could have burned down, and with us in it!”

“But it didn’t burn down, now did it?” Harper snaps at Ruby.

“God, you cheerleading chicks are all sorts of dumb.” Ruby shakes her head.

“Hey! Don’t fucking talk to my girlfriend like that. I would never lay a hand on a woman, but don’t fucking try me! Not where Harper’s concerned,” Andy defends passionately, looking ready to give Ruby a piece of his mind.

“I’m your girlfriend?” Harper swoons beside him, not even caring that Ruby called her dumb.

“Yeah…. well… that is, if you’ll have me?”

“Oh, Andy!” she cries out in utter glee, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“You two are going to make me barf,” Big Mike says before putting two fingers in his mouth and pretending to gag.

“Okay, so dipshit number one over there is the arsonist. That still leaves eleven more fucked-up shitty things that haven’t been accounted for yet,” David interrupts, eyeing all of us suspiciously.

“Actually, I think you did the math wrong on that one. By my count, we only need to find out who the other ten are, since we already established that you’re dipshit number two—the narcissist.”

“Fuck you. Who says I’m not the psychopath?” David counters, as if psychopath is a step up from being labeled a narcissist.

“You just proved my point. You’re too dumb to be a psychopath. That takes brains,” Lucas antagonizes by pointing at his head, gaining David’s middle finger for his troubles. “But he’s right. As much as I hate to agree with David, there was some pretty fucked up shit on that wall. Killer… murderer… that is pretty goddamn heavy if you ask me.”

“Don’t forget fucking rapist,” Harper says, purposely lowering her gaze to the floor, so she doesn’t make eye contact with anyone. “I think that one might top all of the others. I’m sure the rest of the girls will agree with me.”

“Okay, I admit it.” Chris steps into the small circle we’ve created.

“The fuck? You raped someone?” Andy asks, completely bewildered by Chris owning up to it so cavalierly.

“What? Me? No, no, no. God, no. I’d never do that to a woman. Never.” Chris shakes his head like the very thought of harming a woman churns his stomach. “No, what I meant to say is that… well, how should I start this?”

“Take your time, Chris. Just tell us what you meant,” I try to encourage him. It’s clear that whatever he’s hiding has been weighing on him for quite some time. I, more than anyone, understand what it’s like to keep a secret you’re ashamed of.

He gives me a thankful nod and takes a fortifying breath.

“The first thing you need to know is that sometimes The Scourge money my folks get isn’t enough for us to live on. My pops loves to play cards. I’m pretty sure he loves it more than my mom, me, and my little brothers. It wouldn’t be a problem if he wasn’t so bad at it. He loses more than he wins, which means most times, money is tight around our house.”

“We get it. Your old man has a gambling problem. Just get on with it, Chris. We don’t need to hear your whole life story. Just tell us what you’ve done,” Ruby says with a roll of her eyes.

“Will you give him a minute, Ruby? Can’t you see he’s having a hard enough time as it is?” Lucy comes to his defense.

“Thanks.” Chris smiles at her. “When my granddad was still alive, he taught me a lot about plants and shit. He was known for his green thumb back at Blackwater Falls. And though I never really did well in school except for playing football, I soaked up everything he taught me like a sponge. Looking after flowers, herbs, or any other type of plants felt like child’s play compared to the classes we had in school.” There’s real pride in his voice and demeanor as he confesses his love for botany, but all too quickly is that pride replaced by shame. “When things got so tight that we no longer had enough to put food on the table, I used my grandfather’s cabin up in the woods to plant… weed.”

“Did he say weeds?” Abbie whispers, confused.

“What I think the idiot is trying to say is that he’s the drug dealer.” Big Mike smiles like he’s actually prouder that his friend sold pot than he is that Chris found something he actually enjoyed doing.

“I know it’s bad, but I got desperate,” he says, staring at me for some reason. “Please don’t tell your dad, Rowen. My parents would lose their minds if I got locked up. I mean, how would they even survive? My whole family depends on that money to get by. I know it’s a crime, and that I should be punished for it, but if you could keep my secret just between us, I’d be forever grateful. So please, don’t tell the sheriff on me.”

“Jesus,” Elias mumbles, forcing me to elbow him in the gut to keep his mouth shut.

“I promise. My father won’t hear a peep from me. I’ll give you my word.” I smile at him, Chris’ face lighting up instantly.

I try to keep my smile intact, while inside I’m sobbing for him. It’s like he’s either refused to accept that he might die here in this house, or is too naive to even realize the predicament he’s in. The other alternative is that Chris found a way to completely extract himself out of the situation, allowing his mind to lie to him and feed into the illusion that he’s safe. That this is just an adventure he’s on with his friends, and nothing else.

When Chris turns his back to me, I stare everyone down with a menacing glower, not wanting them to say a word that might burst his happy bubble. If this is the way Chris has decided to cope with the games, then who are we to deny him that small ounce of comfort?

“Do you feel better now, buddy?” Lucas asks him, patting his shoulder.

“I really do.” He lets out an exaggerated exhale. “I feel lighter. You guys should try it.” He grins widely.

And with that, Harper raises her hand, announcing that she wants to go next.

“I may have manipulated a nerd or two back in school to do my homework for me. Okay, maybe more than that,” she grimaces. “I’ve never written a paper or have done my own homework since the seventh grade. There, I said it.” She breathes out like she’s finally free of all her burdens.

“Fuck me. Is this amateur hour? I thought you people had more in you than this pathetic drivel,” David scolds, unimpressed with the sins admitted so far.

“Hey, you jerk! It was really hard for me to admit that. For years I thought what I did made me the worst person alive, so shut it!” Harper shouts at him, offended that he didn’t think her admission of guilt was juicy enough for him.

“It wasn’t a very nice thing for you to do, Harper. No one likes being used like that. But I don’t think it makes you a bad person. Just a bit flawed, like any human being is,” Abbie says softly.

“Thank you, Abbie. You really are the sweetest.” Harper smiles widely at her, only for her grin to drop when Big Mike starts talking.

“That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Compared to the rest of us here, that’s nothing.”

“You should know,” Harper mumbles through gritted teeth.

“If you got something to say, then say it,” Big Mike challenges, looking like he actually wants to hurt her. “I know you’re dying to. You’ve been eyeballing me all night.”

“Don’t you dare intimidate my woman, asshole. Or you’ll have to deal with me.” Andy gets up from the sofa, ready for whatever Big Mike has in mind.

“Shit. Now that Andy’s balls have dropped, he thinks he’s hot shit!” Big Mike laughs. “You think you’re scary now that you’ve gotten some pussy?”

“He might not be, but I sure as fuck am,” Elias says, his tone cold and threatening.

Big Mike has the good sense of mind to not say anything else, knowing that Elias wouldn’t think twice about showing him what scary really looks like.

“Fine. Now that we have our narcissist, arsonists, drug dealers, and manipulators out of the way, that still leaves us eight sins, four huge ones at that,” Ruby exclaims, needing to get to the good stuff.

“If you’re so eager to find out ours, why don’t you tell us yours?” Lucy asks.

“I lie. Big whoop. That’s my big secret,” Ruby admits with a shrug.

“No. That’s not yours,” Mackenzie utters for the first time since we came into the den.

“Shut up, Mack,” Ruby warns.

“Why? Are you scared I’ll out you?” Mackenzie smiles sinisterly.

Ruby just stares at her while Mackenzie looks at her painted nails with no care in the world.

“The thing about being the mayor’s daughter is that I have to attend loads of dinners with my parents. Since Ruby’s dad is the head of the hospital, we go to Ruby’s house… a lot. Which means I know exactly what word best describes her.” Her disturbing grin widens, as she focuses all her attention on Ruby. “I’ve seen how you love to emotionally blackmail your parents into giving you whatever you want,” she says, before using a whiny baby voice, “Oh, no! Daddy is too busy to play with me! And all Mommy cares about is her bridge game and her tiny sleeping pills. Not even the girl I love wants anything to do with me. Waaah, waaah, waaah.” Mackenzie pretends to cry like a baby, rubbing her fists over her eyes to push her point across. “You want to know who’s really pathetic, Ruby? Why don’t you take a long look in the mirror.”

“And what are you, huh? You’re a bitch! If there’s a psycho in our midst, it’s this bitch right there!” Ruby points to Mackenzie

“Maybe I am. Maybe I’m not. Who knows. But say that I am… what are you going to do about it?” Mackenzie taunts with an ugly sneer.

“Stop! Just stop!” Lucas shouts, trying to be the voice of reason within our group. “We’re not getting anywhere if we keep antagonizing each other. Remember what Henry said. We can’t physically hurt each other, or else the Hosts will have a field day punishing us.”

Once he’s made sure that both Ruby and Mackenzie are composed enough not to start a fight, Lucas directs his attention to the whole group.

“I very much doubt the killers and rapist amongst us will out themselves. Am I wrong?” he says, waiting for someone to say anything in return. When all he gets are crickets, his shoulders slump. “That’s what I thought. Henry left us here to decide on who we want to choose as our partners for the games. I say we forget the wall, since it is obviously a ploy by our hosts meant to split us up and turn on each other. I say let’s not give them the satisfaction and just do as Henry asked. My partner is Lucy. Andy, who’s yours?”

“Harper,” Andy replies without missing a beat, wrapping his arm around his girlfriend.

“Elias, what about you?” Lucas turns his attention to us next.

“Rowen.” My heart skips a beat hearing my name spill out from his lips with such conviction.

“David, your turn. Go.”

“Mackenzie,” David states, winking at her.

“Of course it is.” Lucas shakes his head.

“Wait! Why do the guys get to choose? I didn’t figure you to be part of the patriarchy, Lucas,” Ruby reprimands.

“Fine, Ruby. Choose. Who will be your partner?”

She looks at Big Mike and Chris and decides that if she wants to win, she needs brains as well as brawn.

“Big Mike.”

“Good for you. That leaves Chris and Abbie together. Are you two cool with that?”

Abbie looks at Chris and nods.

“Then we have our partners. The task is done. So, if you don’t mind, I would rather go back up to my room with my girl, and spend whatever hours we still have in peace. If I’m to die tomorrow, I don’t want to spend my last night with you assholes.”

“Ditto,” Andy agrees, gaining a side eye from Lucas. “Wait. No. You’re not the asshole. I meant them. Fuck. You know what I meant.”

Lucas throws him a little grin before lacing his fingers through Lucy’s and strutting out of the den, with not so much as a goodnight.

“And on that note,” Andy says, jumping off the couch and offering his hand to Harper, “Shall we, my lady?”

“We shall, my lord.” She giggles, placing her hand in his so he can give it a quick kiss before pulling her up. Harper waves over to me and Abbie, while completely ignoring Ruby and Mackenzie.

“I think that’s our cue to leave,” Elias whispers in my ear, entwining his hand in mine.

I throw a sincere grin over to Abbie and Chris, but then take a page out of the Harper Thomas playbook and pretend that everyone else doesn’t exist to me. They all showed their true colors tonight. Not that I didn’t have an inkling to how rotten they were already.

“I’m exhausted,” I say, leaning my head on Elias’s shoulder as we walk up the staircase to our room.

“It’s been a long day and we didn’t get much sleep last night.”

My cheeks heat up at the reminder, as does the rest of my sore body.

“Don’t worry. You get the night off tonight.” He chuckles softly.

My sore bones thank him, while my heart can’t help but be disappointed.

Once we turn into our corridor, we see Andy waiting for us at his door, the sound of a giggling Harper coming from inside the room.

“I would have thought you two would be in bed already,” Elias goads, halting his step to talk to Andy.

“That can wait.”

“No, it can’t!” Harper yells from inside.

“Baby, please, just one second,” he pleads with her, while Harper answers by throwing a pillow at his head.

“I don’t think you have one second.” I laugh.

“It’s like I told ya, this… is addictive.” He winks, pointing to his scrawny chest, before closing the door behind him, leaving it slightly ajar.

“Stop flirting and start talking,” Elias grunts, letting go of my hand just to snake a protective arm around my waist.

“I don’t know about you, but that shit that went down tonight kind of made my flesh crawl.”

“Yeah, it creeped me out, too. I’m not sure any girl here will feel safe knowing there is a rapist in our group. By my count, it’s either David or Big Mike. The narcissist could easily be Mackenzie.”

“We can’t shrug off Lucas either,” Elias points out.

“No, not him.” I shake my head.

“Why not?” he counters.

“Because…”

“Why? Because he has a girlfriend? Because he’s well spoken? Because he’s a nice-looking guy?” Elias stares at me like I should know better. “Ted Bundy was all those things, and he still found time to rape and kill women.”

“Fine. You’re right. But we can’t jump to conclusions without proof.”

“And how do you suggest we do that?” Elias cocks a brow.

“Maybe we ask someone who knows.” I chew on my bottom lip nervously.

“And you think one of us knows?” Andy asks.

“I think maybe your girlfriend might,” I tell him. “At least, I have this nagging feeling that she knows.”

“Harper would have told me something like that.”

“Not if she’s one of the victims.” I frown. “A thing like that is hard to admit, much less talk about. Much easier to pretend it never happened and move on.”

“You think you can get that info from your woman?” Elias asks Andy pointblank.

“I’ll try, but I still think you’re wrong,” Andy says adamantly. “Harper and I don’t keep secrets from each other.”

“Hate to be the one to tell you this, kid, but you just started dating the girl three nights ago.”

“Doesn’t matter, Elias. We could have met three minutes ago, and I would still know her heart. The same way she knows mine,” Andy rebukes, insulted that his friend would throw such a thing at his face.

“You’re right, Andy. Time is inconsequential when it comes to love. I’m happy you two found each other,” I tell him, trying to take the sting out of Elias’s reminder.

“Yeah. It took us years, but we finally got here.” Andy’s cheeks tint crimson.

“Let’s throw the fireworks after we know who the rapist is, yeah? Ask your girl what she knows,” Elias says, only this time it doesn’t sound like a request, but more like an order.

“Okay, I’ll ask,” Andy concedes, his shoulders hunching in defeat.

“But not tonight.” I press my hand on Andy’s shoulder. “Tonight, make it memorable for other reasons. Okay?”

He smiles timidly. “Thanks.”

“No problem. Good night,” I say, pulling Elias with me down the corridor before he says anything else that may cost him his friend.

But we’ve barely managed to walk to our door when Andy whistles for us to turn around.

“Wait. Wait,” he whisper-yells. “Who do you think is the murderer and killer in the group? Shouldn’t we be on the lookout for those two, also?”

“Oh, that one’s easy.” Elias grins at him. “You’re looking at them.”

And with that, we turn around, slip into our bedroom, and close the door behind us.

“That wasn’t funny.” I try to hide my smile as Elias strolls into the room with a sly grin on his face.

“I thought it was.” He chuckles, amused, pulling his t-shirt over his head, followed by his pants.

“Thankfully, I doubt Andy believed you. But it was still a pretty risky joke to make.”

“I’m all about taking risks, Roe. Now, why don’t you take those clothes off and come to bed?” he instructs, plopping on the bed and slapping the space beside him.

I do as he says and begin to peel my clothes off my body, his penetrating gaze following every move I make. Once I’m only in a bra and panties, I slide into bed, only to have him pull me to his side, my head instantly finding purchase over his bare chest.

“I know you said we weren’t going to do anything tonight, but did you really mean it?”

“Why are you asking?”

“I’m still really sore from last night,” I confess, a bit embarrassed, though I really shouldn’t be, since he’s the reason every inch of my body feels tender to the touch.

“Hmm. I figured as much. It’s fine. There are plenty of other ways we can enjoy ourselves tonight.”

I place my chin on his chest and stare at him.

“How can you think about sex after everything that happened tonight?” I ask, honestly puzzled as to how he can switch off so easily. “I mean, look at where we are. Aren’t you just a little bit… oh, I don’t know… concerned?”

“About The Scourge ?” he asks while fiddling with a lock of my hair.

“Yes, The Scourge !” I slap his chest lightly. “This whole house… Henry and the twins… that white room… it’s all…”

“Terrifying?” he finishes for me.

“Yes. Very much so.” I chew on my bottom lip. “Aren’t you even the tiniest bit scared about what will happen tomorrow?”

“No.” The word falls from his lips with such conviction that I can’t help but be in awe of him.

“Nothing scares you, does it?”

“No,” he replies with that same assured, confident tone of his, as he continues to play with my hair.

“Must be nice to be you then,” I mumble, resting my head on his chest. “I’m petrified.”

“What scares you most?” he asks, sounding intrigued with my confession. “I know that you don’t fear death, so where is this fear coming from?”

I look up at him again, his blue eyes shimmering with genuine curiosity.

“We’ve made friends in this group. People like Harper, Andy, and young, sweet Abbie. It’s been a long time since I’ve made such a connection with someone. I forgot how good it felt to have that camaraderie, to have friends that care for you. I just don’t want them to get hurt, which I know is naive of me, since we were literally sent to this house to die. But still… they’re my friends.”

“I see that you left out my name from that list.”

“Is that what you are? My friend?”

“I’d say I’m your best friend since I’ll be the one to give you what you desire most.”

My shoulders relax at his remark and the insinuation behind his eyes.

He’s right.

Among all the people I’ve bonded with on this journey, this is the friendship I value most.

Maybe that’s the real reason I’m so scared.

Yes, I’m worried about what may happen to our friends in the morning, but what really petrifies me is wondering what kind of games The Scourge might have in mind for him.

I’m so lost in my head that I only snap out of it when Elias pushes me to lie on my back, his strong body looming over mine.

“How about we stop talking about shit we can’t control and start focusing on what we can?” he says before leaning down to press his lips on mine.

It takes me a second to register what’s happening, but just a second. All too soon do I let myself enjoy the feel of his warm lips, the way his teeth tug at my bottom lip, his tongue teasing his way into my mouth. My heart feels like it’s about to leap out of my throat with the way he hums approvingly each time my tongue wrestles with his. By the time he lets up on his kiss, I’m seeing stars and counting rainbows.

“What did you do that for?” I ask breathlessly.

“Because,” he says, his voice low and gentle. “If I’m to die tomorrow, I would want to have done that at least once.”