Done (Harmony Haven #1)

Chapter 36

Chapter Thirty-Six

EASTON

Sending me a text on a random Thursday afternoon asking me to come over so we could talk was a dead giveaway that it wasn’t going to be good. She was ready to try her big escape, away from what we had and what I knew we could be. But from the moment I got there, she was shaking and breathless. It was hard to resist kissing her and touching her when we both so clearly needed one another.

As I walked her up the stairs, it felt like it could very well be the last time. That no matter how perfect we were, and how much I insisted I’d wait for her, she’d still be too scared and adamant to change her mind. I didn’t know shit about being a parent, but I knew that if she thought not being with me was best for Max, then it was a decision she’d make regardless of either of our hearts.

I loved her even more for that.

“You’re gonna break my heart,” I whispered. But I didn’t give her a chance to refute. It’d have been a wasted breath and if I only had one more chance to make her breathless, it wouldn’t be spent disputing our feelings.

Taking one finger, I traced between her breasts, pulling the top of her dress down. Her nipples hardened as soon as they were exposed to the cool air of the room, and I moved my mouth down to cover one and then the other. Fingers ran through my hair and she pushed on the back of my head, making me suck harder.

My cock was throbbing, my jeans were uncomfortable, and sweat had started to form over my entire body. When I lifted my head and looked into her eyes, she could tell I was having a hard time controlling myself. I intended to go slow, but my body needed to be inside of her as soon as possible.

When she reached down, she cupped my cock through my jeans and her legs spread open. It only took a few rough squeezes and I felt spineless again. So weak that I couldn’t stop myself from pulling the dress off her body and throwing my clothes around her room.

Climbing over top of her, I pushed my cock against her core, finding that soft opening, where the wetness from her pussy pulled me in and warmed me up . It was all I could do to tease her, tempt her. Make her needy with anticipation.

Once I was inside of her, though, I felt at ease, like I was home, right where I belonged. It didn’t keep the urgency at bay, but it did remind me that I needed to savor the feeling.

Slowly, I pulled out and then pushed back in, watching intently as her eyes widened and her lips quivered. Every few thrusts, I’d kiss her, passionately and with intent. To show her that us making love should last forever. That we should always be connected the way we were.

Eventually, the slow and methodical movement wasn’t enough for either of us, and I held tightly to her head with both of my hands while I moved with more force. Her breasts were jiggling, rubbing against my chest and making me want to put my mouth back on them.

“Don’t give up,” I pleaded, with a husky tone. “Don’t make me leave, Jess.”

It was pathetic of me to beg, especially as we peaked from the love we were making. But I was desperate. I could feel her starting to squeeze and convulse beneath me. She was going to come, and then she’d return to her senses and tell me we had to stop. That she couldn’t risk her heart. That she couldn’t risk the emotions because of how it would affect Max.

“What if we don’t work?” she cried.

“I don’t know,” I confessed. “Doesn’t seem like that’s plausible, so I don’t know.”

“I can’t risk it. I’m already too far gone as it is.”

“Just come for me, baby.” I sped up slightly, hoping to push her over. “Let everything else go and just come.”

“Easton!” She cried, with tears falling down her cheeks as she climaxed beneath me.

“Fuck,” I yelled back, unable to articulate any other words as I came as well.

My mind was blank, a completely dark space where nothing mattered except the pleasure between us. It was so deep, there was a chance some of my memories would never return. Would Gramps even believe me if I told him I forgot how to shell butter beans?

“Oh God,” I breathed, then kissed her as I came back to the light.

As I rolled off of her, I pulled her with me, wanting her to stay close and not run immediately away. She didn’t fight it and wrapped her arm around my waist, holding me close to her as well.

After a few quiet minutes, I laughed. “I really do go blank, Jess. My mind just forgets everything when we’re together.”

Instead of laughing, she nodded and sighed. “Maybe that means you understand why I can’t do this. I can’t afford to lose my focus.”

It wasn’t like that, and she knew it. We may have gotten lost in each other when we could, but we were adults that knew how to focus on the things that mattered. We were responsible and we…

“Oh shit,” I sat up quickly, suddenly realizing we were the opposite of responsible. “I didn’t use a condom.”

Jesse’s eyes widened with realization and she rubbed her legs together, as if the proof of my statement was running down her skin. “Oh no.”

“I don’t know what came over me. I just?—”

“Lost focus and control,” Jesse finished for me.

Fuck.

“I’m on birth control,” she sighed, “I’m not worried about getting pregnant, if that is what you’re thinking.”

“Isn’t it what you’re thinking?”

“No,” she stood from the bed and grabbed a robe, wrapping it around her as she walked toward the bathroom. “But…”

She shook her head, not finishing her sentence. Then she turned and headed into the bathroom while I threw my jeans on in a panic.

A few minutes later, she returned and I was standing in the middle of her bedroom with my hands on my hips, wanting to know what she was going to say.

“But what?” I asked, reminding her of where she left off.

“What’s the deal with Rory?”

“Excuse me?” That had been the very last thing I expected from her mouth. “What do you mean?”

“I heard that you and she have a past. That she left after you got her pregnant, and when she came back, there was no baby. Which means?—”

“It means she's a goddamn liar,” I yelled. “It's hard to get someone pregnant when you’ve never touched them.”

“But you went to prom with her.”

“Jess, that was fourteen years ago, and I took her because I felt sorry for her. We danced, I drove her home, and a few days later, she acted like we were a couple. I told her I just wanted to be friends, and after several attempts, she gave up. Or I thought she had. She left town, but not before she told her parents, who told the entire town, that I had gotten her pregnant and she had to leave. Jess I have never been with her. And even if I had, I’m not sure what happened 14 years ago matters when it comes to you and me.”

“It doesn’t,” she agreed. “And I feel silly even bringing this up. But I heard that you two may still be seeing each other, that she was seen leaving your room the other day. I know I’ve told you we couldn’t be together and I meant that , so I really have no right to care who you?—”

“Stop!” I had heard enough. It wasn’t Jesse’s fault, because how would she know not to believe a damn thing she hears in town. But… “I have done nothing but show and tell you how much I care for you. From the moment I first saw you, I was done for. No more nights out, no more flirting and no more letting Rory get away with her shit.”

“It’s not that I…”

“No Jess, no ma’am. You know damn well it matters. The only thing I’m guilty of is not telling you every time Rory pulled some shit, but honestly, every time I’ve seen you, Rory is the last person I’m thinking of. I forget everything. You’re all I see when I’m with you.”

My fists were clenching, my jaw was ticking. I was angry, I needed space, but Jesse needed to hear me out before I left her alone. She needed to know how far I had fallen for her so she never had a reason to resort to believing anyone else but me.

“Wanna know why I was late to our first date at Wal-Mart? Because before I could read your answer to question five, I lost the binder. Or I thought I had. I retraced my steps from the station, then back to Fiddler’s, then back to the station. Captain Reed had grabbed it from Rory’s hands, and when I confronted her about it, she flipped. Acting like I was crazy. I should have told you, Jess, but once I saw you again, it no longer mattered. It wasn’t something I cared enough about.”

“Easton,” Jesse cried softly. Her arms had wrapped around her waist and she looked sick to her stomach.

“The morning after the first night we spent together, I went straight to work. I was tired, happy, and a thousand percent sure I was going to make you fall in love with me if it was the last thing I ever did. But when I walked into my room, intent on falling asleep, I didn’t even turn the light on and you know there isn’t a window. Rory was in my bed and…”

I swallowed, taking a minute to shake off how pissed I still was that she dared to cross a hard line. But now that I was talking to Jesse, realization was hitting me like it never had before.

“She did it on purpose. She knew I’d never go for it. Even before I met you, I never led her on. I never made her think that would be okay. She wasn’t drunk, and there was no misunderstanding.”

“She created a situation for Harmony Haven’s gossip mongers to chat about,” Jesse scoffed.

“Yeah,” I sighed, thankful Jesse could see it so clearly. “That’s exactly what she did.”

Fuck.