Duncan’s Honor (The Aegis Network: Jacksonville Division #7)

Chapter 6

6

D uncan had been taking cold showers for the last year.

Freezing showers since he’d gotten a taste of Chastity.

For the last few days, it was all he could to contain his growing excitement to tell her that he’d changed his mind.

And now he sat in a four-seat, 850 horsepower Lancair Evolution aircraft, flying the woman who’d been under his skin for months to the small town of Millersburg, Ohio, to her family farm knowing he’d have to set aside his feelings for a few more days.

Not the right time or place.

He’d do anything for any team member, including lay down his life. So, helping Chastity was an easy choice.

Being around her proved more difficult. So much so, he often contemplated putting in for special missions with the Aegis Network, but every time he went to make the request, he backed out, waiting for his rotation.

But deep down, he knew Chastity had played a large part in that decision, and that had terrified him.

After he’d made love to her, twice, the memory of the overwhelming crushing pain that his ex had caused him gripped his mind and soul so tightly he had to back away. He’d been a coward. He didn’t want to be that man anymore.

He wanted Chasity.

“How long until we land?” Her voice crackled through in his ears. His lips tugged into a short smile.

“About forty minutes.” He glanced at his copilot. Her long blond hair, which she pulled tight in a ponytail at the nape of her neck, cascaded over her right shoulder. Her soft, tanned skin reflected the sun’s rays, making her sparkle like a diamond. And her cobalt eyes shimmered with a certain sweetness you could only find in a genuine person. Everything about her tugged at his heartstrings.

“You want to take over the controls for landing?” She had a hundred hours in flight school and could easily pass her pilot test, but she kept putting it off.

“Nope,” she said firmly.

“Come on. You’ve done it perfectly before.”

“I know I have, but I prefer to be a passenger, you know that.”

“What if I want a break?” He dipped the nose of the plane lower, heading toward a small landing strip not far from her family’s farm. He almost felt as if he knew her family after many late-night conversations. Their upbringings were so different, yet so similar. She should have been perfect for him, but she’d left her ex because he was pushing too hard to get married.

And she didn’t want to. Or at least that’s what he believed.

And Duncan had no longer wanted that life.

Yeah, right.

He’d wanted it in the worst way, but Robin had stolen it from him and he couldn’t allow his heart to take it back.

But everything had changed. He just needed the right time to tell Chastity that. And maybe a little courage.

“Come on, Chastity. Land the plane, and then you should sign up to take your test when we get home.”

“Why do you push me so hard to get my pilot’s license?”

“Because you’re good,” he said, staring into her soft, ocean-colored eyes. If they were pools, he’d jump in and float around, never to leave. She had to be the smartest person he’d ever met. Bravest too. Not to mention strong. Hell, she was fucking perfect, and he was the moron who was too chicken to tell her how he really felt. “And if you didn’t intend to get your license, why do the training?”

“Truth?” Her thick lashes fluttered as she lowered her gaze. Her cheeks flushed.

“Always,” he said.

“To spend time with you.”

“Huh?” He did a double-take. His heartbeat increased. He’d always known that she liked him more than a friend. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t returned the feelings, but they spent so much time together as a team, it surprised him she’d take flying lessons to be with him.

“When I first moved here, you commented you wouldn’t fly with me without taking lessons first, so I signed up.”

He shook his head. “I would have taken you up regardless.”

“I wanted to impress you with my skills.”

“You impressed me the second you walked into the station house.” He’d been enamored by her since their first training session together. So much so that he screwed up and nearly broke his ankle, tripping over the hose. Her instincts as a firefighter were sharper than those of many seasoned firemen. He trusted her with his life.

But he hadn’t been able to trust her with his heart.

That was all going to change.

A long silence filled the cockpit. He concentrated on his checklist for landing. A rental car would be waiting for them at the airport, and he planned on going to her parents’ first so they could look through her sister’s things for clues.

Then, based on what Darius had found out, they would go to the young man’s house to ask probing questions. He couldn’t wait to land so he could check his email for that information. What little they had didn’t seem to add up to anything but trouble.

He glanced at the beautiful woman next to him, who peered out the window, chewing on her fingernail.

“Are you okay?”

She turned her head. “Not really. Going home under these conditions isn’t going to be fun.”

“Well, you’ve got me to hold your hand.”

“Ah,” she said, turning her gaze back out the window. “My one-night stand is my knight in shining armor.”

“Ouch. That hurt.”

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I’m just stressed.”

“I understand.” If he weren’t preparing to land, he’d reach out and make her look at him. Her attitude about everything, but especially him, made him batshit crazy. Not that he wanted her pining over him, but hell, he cared more about her than he thought he could ever care again.

He wanted to laugh out loud.

He’d never told her that.

“But it wasn’t a one-night stand. We care about each other and I don’t like you reducing what happened to something so meaningless,” he said.

“Why are we hashing this out at eight thousand feet when we’ve discussed it before?” she asked.

“Because maybe I have a bit of regret.”

“Excuse me?” Her voice screeched. “What the hell does that mean? I thought you said you’d never regret being?—”

He took his hand off the control for a second, covering her mouth. “I sometimes think maybe I made a mistake by not giving us a chance.” Shit. Not exactly how he expected to say those words, and especially not while flying an expensive plane he didn’t own. He’d planned on telling her that tonight over dinner, since he’d tricked her into thinking there was a gathering at his place when, in reality, it was just the two of them.

“If you think that is going to get me to land this plane, well, the answer is still… oh, fuck it, hand over the controls.”

“Are you changing the subject?”

“Hell yes,” she said, glaring at him. “We’re friends. Not lovers. Not boyfriend-girlfriend. Just friends.”

He didn’t like the sound of that, but he switched the controls to her side of the plane. “She’s all yours.” He flipped the comms switch. “Riley Tower, this is Booker requesting landing permission.”

“Booker, this is Riley Tower. Permission is granted. Come in east to west for landing.”

“You have to circle?—”

“I know,” she said, turning the plane three degrees to the left so she could come around the runway from the east.

Duncan smiled. “Let me know if you need a hand.” He eased back in his seat and tried not to stare at her too much while she masterfully brought the plane to the runway, landing it with the precision of a sniper. The aircraft barely bounced as she skidded to a stop.

She followed the ground crew to a spot near the small aircraft hangar. They went through the shutdown checklist for the next ten minutes before jumping from the plane.

He tossed both their rucksacks over his shoulder.

“I can carry my own,” she balked.

“I know you can.” But he would be the gentleman his mother raised him to be. He tossed them in the trunk of the Charger he’d rented. Nothing like a good old-fashioned muscle car. Glancing at his phone, he opened the passenger door for Chastity. “Shit, nothing from Darius yet.” He tucked his phone in his back pocket and blocked the entry to the vehicle.

She tipped her head, staring up at him, eyes blinking.

He reached out, tucking a stray strand of blond hair behind her ear. Screw being a gentleman. Gently, he brushed his lips over hers in a sweet and tender kiss. It wasn’t overtly sexual, but a promise of something more.

Something real.

Her hands rested on his chest, and he half expected her to push him away. When she didn’t, he took that as a sign he could deepen the kiss. Circling his arms around her back, he pulled her tight. He could get drunk on her kisses. For an entire month, he told himself lie after lie about why he couldn’t be with her, but at that moment, there wasn’t a single one that made sense.

“Duncan,” she whispered. “What are you doing?”

“Trying to tell you I made a horrible mistake walking away from you. I’m sorry. I can’t stop thinking about you and what happened between us. I’d like to give us a try. I’ve given it some serious thought. You know I got burned?—”

She patted his chest. “I know some chick broke your heart, but I have no idea why. What the hell did Robin do?”

What a fucking loaded question, and did he dare tell her the truth?

“Does it really matter?” Most of the time, when he thought about Robin and what she did, his chest would tighten with a combination of the most excruciating pain and raw anger. However, over the course of the last few days, thanks to some serious soul-searching, those emotions lifted from his body.

“You say you made a mistake and want to give us a shot. Well, before I’m willing to do that, I need to know what happened. If you can’t tell me, there is no way we could ever be anything but friends and co-workers.”

“She was pregnant but decided it was too soon, so she had an abortion.” Wow. He wasn’t sure he’d ever said those words aloud, except to Buddy over a year ago when he’d found out. Buddy had been the best friend a man could ever ask for. He never judged, lectured, or even interjected his thoughts. He sat and listened and was there for Duncan. They even became roommates until Buddy fell hard for Kaelie.

Literally.

Chastity gasped, covering her mouth. Her blue eyes grew wide, then narrowed into tiny slits. Fire erupted from them like a volcano. “Without talking to you?” she asked in a faint whisper.

He nodded. He might not have followed the church doctrine as his parents did, but abortion wasn’t something he believed in. At least not for him, and especially with the woman he loved and wanted to marry.

Only Robin hadn’t loved him.

But it was Robin not wanting to get married that threw him over the edge.

And he could have even understood not getting married right away, even though his parents would have lost their shit, but he could have done it, easily.

However, Robin took away any choice they had, and their relationship ended because of it. Over a year later, he’d come to understand that Robin wasn’t the right woman for him. They didn’t have the same core beliefs, and she wanted his money more than she wanted him—a cold, cruel fact he had to learn to live with.

“Duncan, I’m sorry.”

“It gets worse.”

“How?”

“It might not have been mine.” That had been the toughest pill to swallow. At first, he thought perhaps Robin was just being cruel by tossing an affair in his face, but as it turned out, the baby could have been someone else’s, and that fact nearly killed him.

“Fuck,” Chastity muttered. “She’s one cold bitch.”

Though entirely inappropriate, he laughed. Not just at what Chastity said, but swear words sounded so innocent and sweet coming out of her mouth for some odd reason, and it eased the anger that filled his heart every time he thought about what Robin had done.

“That she is, but now I have a question for you.” He took her chin between her thumb and forefinger. “What about Todd? It seems he’s always around. I mean, he moved to Florida to be with you.”

“And he moved back to Ohio two months ago.”

“He did?” That was news to Duncan.

“He’s seeing someone else. Actually, everyone is waiting for them to get married.”

And that brought Duncan to the fear he told himself was driving him away from Chastity.

“I heard he proposed to you a while ago,” he said. Marriage, kids, the white picket fence with a couple of dogs and maybe a cat or two was all he’d ever wanted. Well, besides being a fireman.

He’d given up on all of that the day he left Robin. But Chastity made his heart burn with desire again and for an instant, he thought maybe he could have it all.

“He did, but I didn’t love him, and he knew it. He kept thinking I’d grow to love him. He moved to Florida after I broke up with him, hoping to win me over, but I finally got through to him and he went home.”

“Wait. What?” He stepped back, scratching his head. “You introduced him at a few parties as your boyfriend.”

“No. I didn’t. That’s how he introduced himself.”

“Seriously? That’s a little stalkerish, but you never corrected him.”

“Oh, trust me, I corrected him plenty. He finally gave up months ago when I told him I hooked up with you.”

“We didn’t hook up till last month,” he said, taking a long breath.

“I lied to him. I know. That’s bad, but I needed him to understand he was better off with someone who actually loved him.”

He smiled. “But we did hook up, didn’t we?”

Once again, she patted his chest. “We had sex. But I should thank you for helping get through to him that he and I were never going to happen.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t know he wasn’t your boyfriend this entire time. God, I’m clueless.”

“You’re not clueless. You’re just still reeling from what the bitch did to you.”

He cupped Chastity’s cheek, drawing her in for a single, but sweet kiss. “I’m past that and when this is over, I’d like to see where this might go.”

“I’ll need to think about it.” She pushed past him and slipped into the passenger seat.

He tapped his aching heart. “Ouch.”

Chastity rubbed her hands together, hoping Duncan didn’t notice her body trembling like an earthquake. She’d always prided herself on being cool under pressure. It’s how she survived firefighter school as a woman and being around Duncan in general. Her entire life, acting as if, or faking it till you make it, had been her only coping mechanism, and right now, she worried Duncan may have destroyed it in a tiny, but powerful kiss.

“Grab my phone. It’s vibrating.” Duncan lifted his ass cheek, exposing his buns of steel. Every day she was surrounded by hot firemen, but none of them were anywhere near as sexy as Duncan. Even on his worst day, he was hotter than sin with his chiseled abs, perfectly styled hair, tanned skin, and deep orbs that commanded one’s attention.

“Looks like an email from Darius.”

“Open it.”

“I need the passcode.”

“It’s 242784,” he said.

“I never use numbers, always go by the alphabet. So, this would be”—she tapped at the keypad—“ C-H-A-S-T-I… ” She let the last letter trail off as she dropped the phone to her lap. Her eyes blinked wildly as she stared at his profile going in and out of focus. “That’s the beginning of my name,” she stated the obvious.

“Really? Huh.” He turned his head and smiled.

With shaky fingers, she picked up the phone and cleared her throat, deciding it had to be a coincidence. “Shall I read it?”

“Please do.”

She did her best to ignore her thumping heart.

“Hey, Duncan,

Joey Richards is twenty. He’s from Walnut Creek, but he’s a bit of a drifter. He’s been picked up for dealing and spent the night in county lockup a few times for writing bad checks.

Chastity glanced over the phone. “Who writes checks these days?”

“Don’t your parents?”

“We’re Mennonites, not the Amish. We live in the modern world and use much of the technology it offers.”

“So, your dad doesn’t have this long beard?”

“He has a beard, but no, nothing like that.”

“Good to know. Keep reading,” Duncan said.

“He’s also been arrested for a few bar brawls and possession of illegal substances. His last known employer is a mechanic shop up near Akron, but I can’t find current employment for the last nine months. I have found some pictures of him hanging out with the Rossini boys, sons of Gandolfi Rossini who is currently spending life in prison for human trafficking.”

“Fucking wonderful,” she muttered.

“Wow. You just like swearing, don’t you?”

She laughed nervously, understanding he was trying to lighten the mood. “The first time I said fuck, it was like licking the bowl after my mom made brownies.”

“It doesn’t even sound like a bad word when you say it.”

“That’s not what my mother said.”

He reached out and squeezed her knee. His gentle touch comforted her aching soul, and right now, she needed to draw on his strength.

“Anything else?” he asked.

“Just that he’ll be in touch.”

He laced his fingers through hers. “You okay?”

“No. I’m not.” She pointed. “Take the next right.” Cornfields reached toward the sky with their stalky ends. A slight breeze sent them swaying back and forth in a seductive dance. A cow and horse pasture, filled with the finest animals, lined the left side of the road. Miles and miles of her family farmland stretched on for as far as the eye could see. It amazed her that her father could take care of the farm and be the local doctor.

“We’ll find your sister.”

“It’s not just that.”

“What is it, then?” The car jerked over a few potholes. The large white farmhouse that she’d called home for her first eighteen years came into view around a bend. Her father’s older model Chevy station wagon graced the driveway.

“First, you should know my father is a doctor.”

“What kind of doctor?” he asked with a crinkled forehead.

It reminded her of a cute little baby pug. “He’s a general practitioner. Think Doc Baker on Little House on the Prairie .”

Duncan scratched the back of his neck. “I have no idea what that is.”

She laughed. Of course he didn’t. The show was older than dirt and geared toward young girls. “He treats everyone in our church for basic ailments, does physicals, helps deliver babies, and encourages specialists when someone is really sick.”

“Does he do house calls?”

“Yes. Dark ages, I know.” She laughed, though quickly subdued the noise and cleared her throat. “There is something else I need to tell you.”

“That sounds ominous.”

It could be, depending on how he decided to take this little tidbit. “My mother might think you’re my boyfriend.” She closed her eyes, tight. It had been a stupid thing to tell her folks she’d been dating, but hell, they, too, had prayed God would help bring her to love Todd. She figured if they believed she had a man in her life, they’d give up on the idea that Todd could be the one who got away.

Duncan coughed, taking the turn into her parents’ home a little too tight, stirring up pebbles. “Say what?”

“I’m sorry,” she said. “But ever since Todd came home and started dating the girl who works at my mom’s family store, my parents have been on my case, and it shut them up, sort of.”

“How long have we been dating?” The car came to an abrupt stop. “Just so I can get the story straight.”

“Since last month.” She blinked open her eyes and gasped.

His mouth was only a couple of inches away. He licked his full lips. “What do they know about me?”

She leaned back, but he cupped her neck, drawing her closer.

“I don’t want to mess it up for you, so you should tell me before we go in,” he said with a teasing tone. But his bourbon eyes conveyed a sincerity that made her melt like a chocolate bar in the hot sun.

“Just that you come from a long line of military men and that before you were a firefighter, you were in the Air Force. I might have mentioned that you’re a nice Christian boy.”

His moist breath tickled her skin, sending warm pulses to the places he’d played like a harp that glorious night.

“I’m nice, but I’m no boy,” he teased. “Do they know how old I am? Will that be a problem?”

“Yeah, they know and I can’t say it pleased them,” she whispered. Her chest tightened, and her muscles turned to putty.

His mouth hovered centimeters from hers. His gaze dipped between her lips and eyes.

“Duncan?”

“Yeah,” he whispered.

“Are you going to kiss me?” She held her breath, not understanding why she’d asked the silly question or why she needed to feel his skin on hers. Comfort. That’s all it was. The need to feel connected to another human. “Or do I need to do everything?”

He slipped his tongue between her lips. An audible groan filled her mouth as she wrapped her arms around his strong shoulders. Her fingers dug into his thick muscles. The smell of strawberries filled the inside of the car, making her dizzy.

Tap, tap.

She jumped, turning her head, coming face-to-face with her baby sister, Lilly, who stood with her face scrunched against the window, giggling. Her bonnet covered her long blond hair. She danced in a circle with her blue floral dress twirling around her skinny body. At eleven, she was still so pure and innocent. Part of Chastity had to appreciate the lifestyle to which she’d been born just for that reason.

“She’s cute,” Duncan mused.

But Chastity focused on her father as he stepped from the front door. He stood tall at six-two and had an intimidating, broad frame. At fifty, he looked fitter than most men half his age. His curly dark hair touched the collar of his blue button-down shirt. His beard, trimmed short, was dotted with gray hair. His turquoise eyes caught the sun, making them a sharper green that commanded respect.

People who didn’t know her father might be terrified of him, but he was really a big old teddy bear. Loving, kind, generous, and always the voice of reason. His family had lived more in the modern world than her mother’s and it had caused some friction in the family, but as the years went on, she believed her mother had seen that the twenty-first century wasn’t as horrible as she thought.

“Is that your father?” Duncan asked.

“That’s him.”

“He’s not much older than me.”

“About the same age difference as we are.”

“I think I’ll drop you off here and go find a hotel,” Duncan said with a slight tremble to his voice.

She laughed. “His bark is worse than his bite.”

“I doubt that, and he thinks I’m your much older boyfriend?”

Lilly lifted her dress and raced up the porch steps. “I saw them kissing!”

“Shit, I’m a dead man walking.”