Dzar-Ghan (Alien Barbarians of Vandruk #3)

42. Chapter 42

Decisions had to be made regarding the future of Vandruk, and so far, all we had accomplished was to bicker and fight. Argue over who would have the honor of dispatching Bzun-Lhan. The only thing we had agreed on so far was to leave his body to rot in the very cave he had damned our gallies to. His soul would never enter Koronae. Thlung-Rhan would find a similar end, but we wouldn’t deny his soul to meet Vorag to pass final judgment. At least that’s what we intended until Dzur-Khan spoke up, filling us in on how Thlung-Rhan had mated gallies out so young they hadn’t even bled yet to older males.

After that, we decided to wait for the final judgment on the two priests and the others until we had time to investigate all their crimes thoroughly.

A sudden silence made me look up, and my eyes met Jenna’s. A rush of joy moved through me. She was just who I needed to see right now. I was tired, physically and mentally. In her arms, I would find the peace my heart and mind craved.

She appeared slightly uneven in her steps as she moved forward, and I narrowed my eyes, torn between lunging forward and waiting to see what had brought her here. Going by the set expression on her face, nothing good, and I steeled myself for more bad news.

“I know that seeing Mynarra again changes things between us,” she started, confusing me as much with her words as with her voice, which sounded a bit slurred. “I just wanted you to know that I understand, and I won’t stand in your way”—her timbre hitched—“but I just needed to tell you that these past weeks have been incredible for me. I’ve… fallen in love with you, Dzar-Ghan, and I—”

That was all I needed to hear. Guilt seared through me, and I cried out her name before I scaled the table between us and rushed forward to press her into my arms. “Jenna, did you truly believe all this time I would choose Mynarra over you?”

Her chin lifted, giving me a glimpse of tears brimming in her eyes.

“Oh, my heart. I’m so sorry if I gave you that impression. Jenna, I love you. I would never want anybody but you by my side. You are my mate, my friend, my love. You are my present and my future, my khadahrshi.” My heart nearly shattered when I realized what I must have put her through these last two days and nights. She had been nothing but a light in my darkest hours, and I hadn’t seen how much she had suffered too. I had been too consumed with myself, my rage, to even consider how all of this must have affected her too. She was on an alien planet; I had been the only person she truly knew, and I had failed her. Failed to consider that opening the cave, finding all the dead, and realizing what had happened must have affected her too.

With sudden shame, I remembered Grohn-Vhyn asking Are you prepared to see Mynarra and me off-handedly informing Jenna, Mynarra and I were supposed to mate the day of the tragedy . Hot shame filled me. At the time, we had still expected to find Mynarra dead inside the cave, and then… then things had gone from bad to worse. I hadn’t given a second thought about Jenna’s feelings or how she must have taken my words, especially after we discovered that Mynarra wasn’t among the dead.

“Jenna, I am so, so sorry.” I knew no words could make up for the torment I must have put her through. I hadn’t come to our tent these last two nights, and I wanted to wring my own neck for the message I must have sent her.

Tears falling from her cheeks burned like acid in my stomach. This was on me. I had done this to her. She was hurting because of me.

She blinked at me as I caught a tear from the corner of her eye with the tip of my finger. I took her face in both of my hands, locking eyes with her to convey how sincere I was. My heart bled at the idea of the turmoil she must have gone through. Why had I not taken a moment to talk to her?

“My love. I swear I will never give you reason to cry again. As long as I live.”

“You… love me?” She hiccupped.

“With all that I am,” I swore, feeling as if my heart was being ripped out. I had put her through an unimaginable emotional torture, and instead of yelling at me, all she wanted to know was a confirmation of my love.

“I love you with all my heart, my soul. You are the light of my life and I don’t deserve a gallis like you, but…” The urge to humble myself before her made me go down on one knee, uncaring of what the other khadahrs might say or think. This was between my mate and me. “If you will still have me, I would be honored for you to be my khadahrshi.”

“But… Mynarra?” She forged forward bravely.

“I already told Mynarra about you. It wasn’t easy for her, but she understood. She never expected me not to find a new mate, especially not after ten years. She would also very much like to meet you.”

She sank to her knees beside me. “I would be honored and proud to be your khadahrshi for the rest of my life.”

I pulled her against me and kissed her until my head spun. Then I pulled her to her feet.

Someone in the room cleared his throat. “If we could stop this bedroom scenario and go back to business?”

“Excuse me?” Jenna poked around my chest. “Which khadahr are you?”

I turned to send a warning glare at Ghan-Thor, but he looked more amused by Jenna’s challenge.

“I am Ghan-Thor, Khadahr of Wessborg.”

“Well, Wessborg must breed some bad manners then,” Jenna chided. “I don’t think it’s very polite to interrupt—”

“A meeting regarding the future of our planet?” Ghan-Thor shot right back, and Jenna recoiled slightly.

“Yeah, sorry about that.” She turned back to me. “Not really, though.”

I pulled her against my chest and kissed her again. I wanted more, so much more, but it would have to wait until these other matters were settled.

“My khadahrshi, Jenna,” I announced proudly.

“I’ll wait for you in our tent.” Jenna’s face was flushed as she moved toward the exit. Looking over her shoulder at me, she added, “I love you.”

“Jenna!” I watched her walk into a chair and rushed to keep her from falling. “Watch out for the chair,” I finished when I caught her midair.

She giggled. “I’ll gladly fall over a hundred chairs if it means you’ll catch me.”

“Gods, Jenna.” I gave her one final kiss. “I love you.”

“Go after her, fool,” Tzar-Than yelled at me. “Let’s continue this meeting tomorrow after we all get some food and rest.”

Voices around the room agreeing was all the incentive I needed to rush after Jenna, who stood at the top of the stairs looking down.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, walking up behind her.

“I’m not sure I can walk down these stairs without breaking my neck. I’m afraid I’m a bit tipsy.”

I wasn’t sure what tipsy meant, but I had an idea. Without a word, I lifted her into my arms and carried her down the steps. She snuggled her head into my chest. Her warm breath tickled my skin, and I didn’t think I had ever felt this content in my entire life.

I could have walked with her for days like this, just holding her in my arms, feeling the beat of her heart, and hearing her say the words I hadn’t known I had longed to hear. She had been willing to step aside to make me happy. What kind of gallis did that?

“I will always treasure you,” I whispered. “And to prevent any future misunderstandings, I will tell you every morning and every night that I love you.”

“Hmm, I think I would like that.” She kissed my bare chest. Making me realize that I might have been happy to carry her for days but that my cock had other ideas. And once I realized that my entire body began to yearn for hers.

Our tent seemed too far away. At the bottom of the stairs, I turned and climbed back up with her in my arms. “What are you doing?”

“Finding us a room to finish what you started,” I growled.

“What I started?” She giggled, caressing my bicep.

“Sa, what you are continuing to start,” I scolded half-hardily, not wanting her to stop at all.

The priests had guest rooms in their Temple for khadahrs and other visitors, who were deemed high enough. I imagined some of the other khadahrs might have already chosen a room, but I vowed I would take the first empty one and barricade it if needed. It was high time my khadahrshi and I found some alone time.